 I'm Dr. Lisa Aronson-Fontes, author of Invisible Chains' Overcoming Course of Control in your intimate relationship. Course of Control describes a relationship where one person systematically dominates their partner. Over time, a victim of course of control feels trapped by the following tactics, isolating. The controlling person separates their partner from friends and family. The victim becomes increasingly isolated and dependent on the abuser. Micromanaging, telling the other person what to do, what to wear, who to speak with, how to clean the house, care for the kids and cook. The person being controlled feels less and less free. Stalking during the relationship and after it ends, constant calls and texts suddenly showing up, monitoring the victim's computer and phone use. Being stalked is like being handcuffed to the abuser at all times. Sexual coercion. The controlling person makes the decisions about sex and may require sex on demand. The person being victimized does not feel free to say not now or not like that. Physical violence is sometimes but not always present. It's one weapon of coercive control and not all controlling people use it. Loving acts. The controlling person does loving and romantic things when this seems like the best way to hold on to his partner. His occasional kindness binds her to him. A lot of relationships have some control. Maybe one person handles the money while the other controls their social life. Coercive control is different. We're talking about a relationship where one person dominates the other in several spheres. Not just bossiness, it's domination. Interested in learning more? Please check out my book, Invisible Chains, Overcoming Coercive Control in Your Intimate Relationship and look for my other videos on Coercive Control.