 This time of year, the holidays, I always see my friends and their friends on the internet talking about how they dread this time of year because it's so stressful. Specifically because of their families and what they have to endure. The anxiety and the depression and the guilt and the just plain hurt that they feel is really crushing and it's the worst time of year for them. This is a message for those people. I want to say to you don't go this year. Just don't go. It's not specifically about this year. It is about this year but not only about this year. I wanted to record this last year but I didn't sit down and get my act together and do it. Unfortunately those individuals who suffer the most from the family abuse during the holidays are also the ones who would suffer the most guilt from not going. I want to tell you don't feel the guilt. The abuse comes from your family but the guilt is coming from you and you need to turn it off and feel better about yourself and the first step toward that is to just not go. The reason I'm recording this is because I think there are people who just need to hear somebody say it. Those of you out there who know somebody who needs to hear it, who you've tried to talk to about it before, send them the link to this video and let me say it. I really do think it would help to hear a stranger say it on the internet. Just don't go. Show some love for yourself this year. If you need some further convincing let me tell you those relatives of yours who are hardcore conservatives, hardcore Republicans who torture you the most, listen to me when I tell you they enjoy it. They're not just being themselves and you happen to be in the way. They look forward to this every year. They clap their hands together and say oh boy I'm gonna get to do it to her again this year and when you're not in the room they punch each other in the shoulder and say boy we really got her that time you need to believe me because it's specifically about you and hurting you. The one most effective thing that you can do to disappoint them is to simply remove yourself. It will do wonders for you and it will disappoint them and they don't like that. Just contact the family member who hosts these holiday events or someone close to them either call them or send them a lengthy email or whatever and just tell them that you're not coming and tell them why. It's because my family are a bunch of racists. They are abusive to me every year it's always been that way and I'm finally putting my foot down standing up for myself and I won't be there. Those members of your family who really love you and understand you will support you in this. They will understand. They will say good for you and the ones who say good for you you should invite them to come see you this year and the family members who say oh but you can't do that. This is family you can't do that. They are not being considered of you and you need to take note of that because in addition to the most abusive members of your family all the other members of your family have not been standing up for you all this time. They have not been helping when they could have been and they should have been and you don't need to go spend holidays with somebody else with some friends family or whatever. I've done that before and that's really uncomfortable. That's actually worse. So spending some alone time on the holidays is not a bad thing. I mean wouldn't you rather be alone for a little while rather than wishing you were alone. The friends and family who really love you and understand you will support you on this. So do it this year and if you can't take this advice from a friend or from a relative then take it from me a stranger who is saying it out loud on YouTube. Have a happy holiday and do something for yourself this year okay.