 when the narcissist realizes you were the right choice all along, when they realize that you were a benefit to them, when they realize that you were something they should have felt grateful for, the narcissist didn't think the same way as you did because they didn't have the same amount of knowledge or the same kind of understanding which is why you were never in agreement. You always argued because they had a stunted emotional development, they weren't at the same level as you were, they couldn't understand things the way you did which is why there were so many misunderstandings which is why they were always annoyed because you weren't at the same level so they couldn't understand where you were coming from. It was like having a flat tire, all of the other wheels were operating normally but you had one flat tire so the car couldn't drive properly, you couldn't arrive at the destination, you couldn't get your desired outcome or results so you end up separating, you go in different directions, you move on and you expect them to be okay without you because you saw their potential, you saw the chance or possibility that they could develop something in the future but they were never up to the mark of what you expected from them and that is why you held on to them, that is why you waited because you thought that in the future they could be something great but it never happened, it never came into fruition so you went in different directions and you assumed that they would find someone else would bring up the best in them, you assumed that they would have this epiphany, this moment of suddenly becoming aware and then there would be everything that you wanted them to be for someone else but it never works out that way because it would take years for them to do that and they have no desire to change because they think they can find someone who will accept them as they are, you may not have accepted them but they think they can find someone who will so they go somewhere else but then things start going wrong again, the new person is saying the same things that you were saying to them but they will disagree with it, they will oppose it, they will get rid of that person and then they will find someone else until that situation goes wrong too so they're just experiencing one failed relationship after another until their life passes them by and then in some situations they may develop some awareness because they may not have been full blown narcissists, maybe they just had narcissistic traits so they may start to notice a pattern, they may realize that they are the common denominator in all of these situations and now things are starting to make sense, they remember everything that you said to them and how it didn't make any sense back then but now they finally get it because they had to go through the same situation a few times before they could finally understand it but now you've moved on, you've created a life for yourself while they've been struggling and they're thinking about those times when they were with you, they're thinking about the things you said to them but they couldn't understand it or act that way and it really gets to them because they couldn't be what you wanted them to be, there's always going to be other people, they're always going to find new supply but they want the best, they want someone who's powerful, attractive, intelligent and successful and that's insufficient for the demand, they can't find high value people which is what you were to them, they're just finding people who lied to them and cheat on them, people who aren't about anything, people who are using them for money or sex, they've been through a lot and they start to realize that you are the right choice all along, it starts to sink in but they know that they screwed you over, they know that they mistreated you so they can't just come back because they don't want to put themselves in a position where they're going to be rejected, they have too much pride and arrogance, deep down they feel like they don't deserve you but they push it away, they act like they're better than you, they act like they don't need you even while their lives have fallen apart so they stay ghost, they stay gone but they will be lurking in the shadows, they will be spying on you because they know what they were doing and they want to see if you've moved on, they want to see if there's still a place for them in your life but it's embarrassing for them because they haven't made any improvements, they haven't progressed since they left you because although they did have time on their side to become something great, they were fooling around, they were evading responsibility, they weren't doing anything productive, the narcissist will never realise that you are the right choice while they are with you, they don't realise that until they're no longer around you, until you've moved on, it can take years and then they suddenly have this epiphany but by that time it's too late, even if you took them back they wouldn't be anything good to you, they would be weighing you down and you're at a different point in your life, at one point you were willing to help them but now you're no longer there for them, you've moved on, they will be thinking about how good of a supply you were for them, they will be thinking about when things were better for them but they will be forced to accept that it's too late because they lacked awareness, they didn't recognise your value when you were there so now they've just ended up with other people who are just like them, people who never valued anyone who is there for them, people who are immoral and corrupt, people whose lives are deteriorating and that's really where they belong because that's where they put themselves but they do wish that they could have an opportunity to try it again, they go in through it and that is why the older they get the more bitter and resentful they become because they just keep finding scammers and corn artists, people who aren't really about anything, people who are pretending to be something of value and they see the difference, they remember they didn't have to go through that with you, you were the right choice all along, they just never thought that they would end up in the difficult and unpleasant situation that they are now in, to where they are now struggling and desiring to relive that situation with you again because they realise that you were a blessing for them but now there's nothing they can do about it, thank you for watching I hope this video resonates with you, please like, comment, share and subscribe, if you would like to donate my PayPal link is in the video description, coaching inquiries, you can email me at coach.narc-survivor.uk, thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon