 The narcissist has to get their way. They have to get what they want when they want it. They have to do what they want when they want to do it. Everything has to be done in their way to suit their needs or requirements in spite of opposition. And to them that's how it's supposed to be. It's normal. Because in many cases that's what the narcissist experienced in their childhood. They had everything they wanted. They got to do whatever they wanted. Everything was designed to suit their specific needs or requirements. So now that's what they expect from you. They expect you to bend over backwards for them. They expect you to make every effort to meet their demands. And if you fall short, they're just going to see it as though you're lazy or as though there's something wrong with you. Rather than reflecting on the possibility that maybe they're too selfish and demanding. Because another thing that they experienced in their childhood. Was that they got away with a lot of things. They were never told that they were wrong. They were never disciplined. They were never showed a controlled form of behaviour. And that is why they are so out of control. That is why they feel so invincible. Like they can get away with anything. Because that's what they're used to. They're used to saying or doing whatever they choose and no one ever confronted them. No one ever telling them that what they're saying or doing is wrong. And that is why they think they're always right. That is why they think that everything should always go their way. And that they should always get what they want. Especially at your expense, misfortune or inconvenience. When there is an issue or problem. The narcissist wants to be the one who solves it. They want to be the one who comes up with a solution. But they will do it in a way that doesn't require any serious thought. Because they're just thinking about themselves. They're thinking about what solution might benefit them. Rather than taking your need to the consideration. When the narcissist is trying to decide on how to solve a problem. They're just thinking about how they can get their way. How they can get you to do what they want you to do. That's their idea of solving a problem. You may have a different or opposing idea or belief about the situation. But they will pressure you again and again. Until you finally give in so that they can get their way. In their minds the problem is now solved. They will tell you how things should be done. Rather than answering your questions or taking input from you. And in their minds that makes them a problem solver. They have a strong need for control. They have a strong need for the power to influence and direct people's behaviour and the course of events. They are dominant and overbearing. They think that they are solving problems. But they actually tend to create more problems than they solve. The narcissist has to get their way. They do not consider you because they lack empathy. But for someone to resolve a problem efficiently. They need to have empathy. They need to be able to understand you and share your feelings. They need to take your needed consideration. But rather than doing that they choose to force their way onto you. Which only causes the problem to keep coming back until you begin to resent them. The problems only get worse because they refuse to hear your perspective. Empathy allows two people to cooperate. Rather than just one person telling the other what to do. But narcissists have this sense of superiority. They think they're more intelligent than you are. They think they know more. They think your thoughts and opinions are unworthy of their consideration. If you have a differing opinion. They will intimidate you to make you do what they want. When there's a problem the narcissist will experience a lot of anger and irritability. They hate it when you have different thoughts or opinions. If you say something that conflicts with their fixed beliefs. They will become defensive. They will be very anxious. The challenge will avoid criticism. They will attempt to explain or justify their ideas. They have no interest in your thoughts or opinions. They will invalidate you. They will feel as though they cannot trust what you have to say. They will seem really shocked when you have a different idea. They will ridicule you. The narcissist has to get their way. They have a strong sense of entitlement. They believe that you owe them something. They believe that they deserve more or better than what you were given to them. They display their sense that only their opinions matter. Only their solutions matter. They impose their solutions on to you. They take advantage of you by demanding your attention and commitment. They force you to accept their unwelcome decisions. But that is not true problem solving. There's no equal exchange. There's no mutual benefit. It's just one person getting what they want. While the other person gets a short end of the stick. People have different thoughts and ideas. People have different opinions and beliefs. And that is something that needs to be taken into account. You don't have to agree with everyone. But you should at least be on the same page. You should at least understand what they are saying. To a narcissist. Everything is either good or bad. Black or white. All or nothing. When life is about variety and diversity. Life is about understanding that each individual is unique. And recognizing that we all have our individual differences. We all have our own experiences and perspectives. But the narcissist doesn't make room for that. They want everyone to fit their mold of how they think life should be. Thank you for watching. I hope this video resonates with you. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. Click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos. Check out the new Narx Viva website at www.narxviva.uk where you can read my blog posts, book coaching sessions and join the support forum. If you would like to donate, my paypal link is in the video description. Coaching inquiries, you can email me at coaching at narxviva.uk. Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.