 You really have to have two for an attack. You have to have an attacker and a tacky and forgiveness and a happy dream that just isn't the two. We were talking before about you're unified with everything and everyone. So there's no two. So attack has no ability to exist as a concept in the state of unified awareness everything is unified mind and there is no attacker and a tacky. The ego is the belief that you have ripped your mind away from God and now you have a mind of your own and therefore all this game of the world is an attempt to hold on to that attack. And make it seem like it's something else. Oh, my mother-in-law attacked me or my spouse attacked me or my child or my parent or the weather attacked me or this country invaded or I was abducted by aliens. The victimization just goes on and on and on in all kinds of realms. But really the core idea underneath the law is the belief that attack is real. And the only way out of it is to be shown as Jesus says, I am not a body and my mind cannot attack so I cannot be sick. That's the formula, the Jesus Christ formula for health. I am not a body and my mind cannot attack so I cannot be sick. That's how to, I say, to remember your innocence and to keep it in awareness. But as soon as you believe attack is real and that's where the whole, that's what the specialness is. And then finally, the pleasure part, that's pretty obvious. You know, when you seek for pleasure and when that's a major goal of relationships then you do it by pain. And the more that you're able to just get into your divine purpose in relationships that's an invitation to let go of the pleasure and the pain. And it's not so much that you have to take a stand but it's more that the more you get into your divine purpose the more the distorted miracle impulses and the more that the misdirected impulses get cleared away. It's more like you start to outgrow things. You know, like a child without growth toys. It's not like you have to make a stand. It's more like you grow stronger in your purpose and those other things start to fade away. And as you keep doing this more and more and more then those things become more peripheral awareness. There's a line that says all real pleasure comes from doing God's will. And that's kind of the direction where this is heading. It's not definitely going to let the sacrifice. You know, because you're opening to your function and your purpose. You know, you're drawn more and more into that function and purpose. And then simultaneously your ego desires or things of the world or I might even use the word fantasy. Jesus even talks about fantasies in the Course. And he just says that fantasy is an attempt to make false associations and obtain pleasure from that. And that's quite an interesting description, definition of fantasies. Well, in a lot of relationships there is a lot of fantasy in many different ways. And fantasy fulfillment and we can talk openly about that in the sense that slowly, slowly, gradually as you get more and more into your purpose fantasy begins to lose attractiveness because you get the fulfillment from your purpose. You're getting an intrinsic fulfillment. It's like bubbling up within you and filling you up, literally, like lighting up your mind and as you continue to flow with that then there's no attempt to fill a hole or to fill a void because you don't feel a void in your life. You feel connected with your source and that's what all truth fulfillment is. So when we talk about special relationships and holy relationships the ego's goal for relationships is to bond these together and lines apart. You know, the ego will say well, they still have a relationship point and we've heard stories of people that have stayed married for 20 or 30 or 40 or 50 years where the bodies are together under one roof but anyone who knows them says oh, it's a pretty bad situation. At first they stayed together for economic reasons for the first decade and then the next decade they stayed together for the children's sake and then the third decade they stayed together because they were too afraid that they would lose too much financially or that they wouldn't be able to handle that or they wouldn't know how to date or whatever the reasons are, you know. It's a bad situation when you have bodies together and lines apart and that's precisely what the ego wants. The ego wants you to have a private, separate mind and to have bodies together and so it's like a charade there's no real harmony with that but it's like keeping up appearances, you know. Somebody asked me that years ago they asked me about that and I said well, I would rather have a truly divine and intimate relationship that lasted one minute rather than a typical egoic relationship of 20 years, you know. One minute of divinity would be preferable to 20 years of games, game plans keeping up appearances, you know, playing, pretending and so on and so forth and the ego, therefore, doesn't really like real communication. It likes its form of communication bantering on about senseless things and pretending they're communicating without really talking heart to heart without really having a direct open communication it's more just talking about all kinds of other things and most of us can relate to that most of us grew up in families where we felt like there were a lot of things left unsaid they talked about unspoken rules it didn't matter whether they were ridden out there were a lot of unspoken rules in our family systems things you just don't do things you just don't expose you just don't talk about so I would not describe my years growing up with my family as having wide open free-ranging discussions where anything could be laid on the table oh, there was only a few things that could be laid on the table and those were carefully controlled and now it's kind of gone the other way it's like people aren't with anything to be laid on the table and the purpose of laying it on the table is for exposing it and letting it go not for blaming, fault-finding all the typical egoic reasons so communication is another thing so that's kind of a general description of about you start to see that there's two different purposes for relationships and one takes you into the heights of having this and the other one leads you into the depths of despair and leads you feeling trapped, frankly and wondering how you can get out and that's why I think there's a lot of times a lot of changing in partners or a lot of when there's a lot of unfulfillment I call them Dixie Cup relationships and if you had Dixie Cups over here but these are these little paper cups where you just get a little drink and they're throwaways nobody saves Dixie Cups you just take a little step and you throw them away take a little step and throw them away and that's very much like how the ego works it's very impulsive it wants its gratification and out of it and there's not any kind of sustaining sense of standing in there and hanging in there and working through grievances and issues is more this kind of gratification throwaway gratification throwaway it's kind of a dramatic example but that's the way it works