 The Kraft Foods Company presents Willard Waterman as The Great Gilder Sleeve. The Great Gilder Sleeve is brought to you partially transcribed by The Kraft Foods Company. And Kraft, you know, makes the famous pasteurized processed cheese food, Velvita. Velvita has a wonderful cheddar cheese flavor that's rich yet delightfully mild. It's delicious and it's the finest quality cheese food you can buy because it's made by Kraft. The name that for years has meant only the finest in cheese and cheese foods. Get a package or loaf of Velvita tomorrow and enjoy the cheese food of top quality, Velvita, made only by Kraft. Well, the county fair is getting underway in Summerfield. They say it's going to be bigger and better than ever. That's where you'll find the farmer's wife with the best preserves, the country squire with the fastest trotting horse, the 4-H club boy with the biggest pumpkin, and the water commissioner with the biggest reservoir. Thank you, welcome to the day. I whole come to the fair. The folks are all singing so merry and gay. I whole come to the fair. Porch, you have a good day? Yeah, fine day, Bertie. Tomorrow's going to be even better. It's the county fair. You're telling me. That's why I'm hustling to the grocery. I run out of cinnamon for my competing preserves. Yes, competing preserves? Yes, I don't give up. I didn't win last year, but when you don't win the first time you compete, then you re-compete. Re-compete? Yes, last year my peaches lost out by a fuzz. It's too bad, Bertie. But Bertie ain't giving up. If Bertie don't win the first time she competes, she re-compete. Yeah, that's the spirit, Bertie. Yes, Mr. Gilson, if you know what Bertie does, if she don't win the first time she competes. Yes, good experience at this time of year. This is something in the air. I've got four tickets to the fair tomorrow in grandstand seats for the harness races right on the finish line. Oh, that sounds wonderful. They must have been hard to get. Yeah, they were, but it'll be worth it. I'm going to ask Katherine Milford to go. How about you and Bronco? Care to join us? Oh, we'd love to, Anki, but we're taking the twins over to visit Bronco's parents. Yeah, yes. Well, we'll miss you. You and Miss Milford go and have a good time. Well, Katherine and I won't need four seats. In fact, if the weather stays chilly, we might not use more than one and a half. Leroy! Who are you calling a coward? Yuffer. Who's out there? Leroy, stop that shouting. Yuffer! Leroy, close the door. Now, how did all this happen? Tripped me. I hit him in the nose, and he hit me in the nose and I chased him home. You chased him home? Then why is he standing out in front? He chased me back. Big coward. Honestly, Leroy, Uncle Mort, they're always fighting. Well, if he pokes me, I'm going to poke him back. Well, let's not be so eager to hit back. Yeah, I'm sure most of these silly fights between you and Pete can be avoided. Yeah, he doesn't try to avoid any of them. Well, then why don't you try? You make the first gesture. That's what I did today. I popped him, and he popped me. Well, that's not what I mean, Leroy. Try the soft answer. The soft answer? Turn the other cheek. Are you out of your mind? I mean, you should turn your head away. Keep an eye on him, but you don't have to resort to fisticuffs. Let him know you're above fighting. You may be surprised with the results. Yes, Leroy, why don't you grow up? You don't see Uncle Mort acting like that. He gets along with everybody. Ha! Young man, what do you mean by ha? What about the big battles you have with Mr. Bullard across the street? Uh-oh. No, Marjorie. Bullard and I haven't had an argument all summer. Heck no, he's been out of town all summer. You got back yesterday. I saw him. No argument. He didn't speak to you. Well, perhaps he had a summer cold or something. In fact, I might just run over there right now and inquire about his health. See if he had an enjoyable summer. Oh, that'd be nice, Uncle. Say, I have these two extra tickets to the harness raises tomorrow. Why don't I give them to Bullard? What's he... Well, nothing. That doesn't matter. You'll recognize this is a friendly act and repay in kind. Yeah. I hope he hasn't noticed the grass cuttings he dumped on the back of his lot. Yeah, those. Well, perhaps I shouldn't have done that. If he mentions it, I'll apologize and offer him the tickets. Get along in this world, Leroy. You have to give and take. And that goes for you and Pete Crawford. Sure. I poked him and he poked me. Leroy, I think you'd better come along and observe the way your old uncle handles these things. Yes, I gotta see. It's more neighborly this way. Well, Mr. Bullard, you need all the breaks you can get, huh, Uncle? Hmm. He has a new sign-up, I see. No peddlers. Well, I intend to. Go away! Let's go, Uncle. Yeah, wait, Leroy. Wait. He's in a bad mood. I suppose he is. Give me a chance to illustrate my point to him. Show you what a kind word will do. Oh, brother, this is gonna be murder. We don't want it. Can't you read the sign? Oh, it's you, Gilda Sleeve. Hello, Mr. Bullard. What's that hiding behind you? Oh, hello, Leroy. Hi. Gilda Sleeve, I've been wondering when you were coming over. Oh, really? Yeah, you see, Leroy. When you were going to remove the grass cuttings, you dumped on my lot. Grass cuttings? Gilda Sleeve, why did you do that? Well, you were out of town. Yeah, I mean... I don't know why I did that. I remember why, Aunt. You did it because one time he called you a big water buffalo. Leroy, I don't hold a grudge like that. Gilda Sleeve, isn't that a rather snide way to get even? No, Mr. Bullard, I'm not snide. And I wasn't trying to get even. It was a cowardly thing to do. Coward? Yeah, I'll see you here, Bullard. Aunt? Yeah? Turn the other cheek. I'll tell you. Watch this, Gilda Sleeve. Yes, well, I was about to say, I'll have the grass cuttings removed today. Leroy, you bring the field bear over, and I will take them away. Oh, for corn's sake. Yeah, I'll give you a quarter, my boy. Okay. Now, Mr. Bullard, I have a little surprise for you. You're moving? No. Here, look here. Two tickets for the harness races at the fair. Grandstand seats. Oh. They're for you. Well, thank you. I tried to get two tickets last night, but I suppose I waited too long. Well, they're yours with the couplings of the water buffalo. E-commissioned. Two tickets. Oh, about the water buffalo. You understand, Gilda Sleeve, it was all the same fun night. Oh, yeah. Well, the same with the grass clipping. Yeah. You don't have to worry about me. Oh. Oh, that cream puff routine really works. Well, Leroy and I will be running along. Ta-ta, neighbor. Oh, wait a minute. Neighbor. Yes? Yeah, let me look at my freezer here. You? Ah, yes, yes, here we are. Here we are. Oh, you, Gilda Sleeve. A frozen pie. Frozen pie? Well, thank you. Oh, boy, what kind is it? Gooseberry. You wonderful, my favorite berry. Come along, Leroy. Thanks for the tickets. Thanks for the pie. Gosh, thanks for the lesson, Aunt. You're welcome, my boy. A pie, Bertie, right out of Mr. Bullard's freezer. Does he know you got it? Bertie. Do you want me to thaw it out for dinner? Yes, nobody. I think I'd like to keep it around for a while. It's the first thing Mr. Bullard ever gave me. Yes. What you got to do, Aunt, put it on the mantle? No. No, my boy. But it does prove the power of a smiling face and a kind word. It sure does. Bertie, do you know what I'm going to do the next time Pete pushes me? If I know you, Leroy, you'll push him right back. Not me. I'm going to be nice to him. He pays off, doesn't it, Uncle? It certainly does. Boy, I can't wait to find Pete and get him to push me. My, my. When did that little boy grow his wings? Well, I guess his wise old uncle will have to take credit for that, Bertie. Yes, sir. I showed Leroy that kindness could make a friend, even out of Mr. Bullard. Yes, sir. You should have seen the way he warmed to me, Bertie. And incidentally, he said the names he's been calling me were all in fun. Yes, sir. You know, I'm glad I thought to give him those two extra tickets to the harness races. I had him figured all wrong, Bertie. Yes. That Bullard is really a fine thought. You called him to tell him that? Oh, no, no. I'm calling Miss Milford. Taking her to the fair tomorrow. Well, that's nice. Yeah, George. Doing a kind deed makes a man feel good. Brightens up the whole world. Yeah, I'm never going to do another mean thing to anybody as long as I live. Hello? Hello, Catherine. Rock Morton. Oh, hello. Well, I've been away. But I'm back and looking forward to seeing you. Well, good. Catherine, the fair opens tomorrow, you know. Yes, I know. You took quite a little finagling, but I managed to get two choice seats for the harness races. Would the fairest girl in Summerfield care to go to the fair? You can't. Why not? Well, oh. Bullard. Oh. You're nothing. So am I. Goodbye, Catherine. Bye. I should have known that's exactly what he'd do. Birdie? Yes, sir? Faw Bullard's pie. I'm going to push it right in his friendly face. The great gilded sleeve will be back in just a minute. Thing like it. Can you imagine that? Well, what's the matter there, Birdie? Just look at what's left of that big two-pound loaf of velvita I put in the refrigerator yesterday. I declare I never seen anything like the way Mr. Gilles sleeve had little Leroy getting heat. Oh, have they been raiding the ice box again, Birdie? Mr. Easton, they just seem never to stop raiding that ice box. That's one reason Birdie always keeps velvita handy right as you open the ice box door. Mmm, that's a good idea, Birdie. Crafts golden pasteurized processed cheese food makes wonderful snacks. It's perfect, sliced for hearty sandwiches or to go with your favorite crispy crackers. Yes, sir. That velvita sure is good tasting. You can't blame Mr. Gilles sleeve and little Leroy for eating so many snacks, Mr. Easton, because velvita has a fine flavor, a flavor that's rich and yet mild, too. I know because sometimes Birdie gets hungry between meals and has a little velvita snack, too. Birdie, don't forget, velvita gives you wholesome snacks. That's because velvita is good for you and rich in important food values for milk. Yes, sir. That's what Birdie always says. For snacks that are sure good and sure wholesome, get velvita for sure. That's right, Birdie. Yes, sir. For snacks that are sure good and sure wholesome, get velvita for sure. Yes, Birdie. Mr. Easton, you know what Birdie always says. I know, Birdie, but... That's right. For snacks that are sure good and sure wholesome, get velvita for sure. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Gilder Sleeve and his neighbor, Rumson Bullard, have never been the best of friends. But in trying to set a good example for Leroy, he generously gave Bullard two tickets to the harness races at the county fair, whereupon Bullard generously invited Gildy's girlfriend, Miss Milford. Sneaky neighbor. Yeah, I know one thing. End up going out to the fair and sitting next to the man who's sitting next to my girl. I'd look like a fool. Yeah, maybe I am a fool. Hello, Pee-Vee. Yeah, hello, Mr. Gilder Sleeve. What can I do for you today? Nobody can do anything for me, Pee-Vee. I'm hopeless. You don't say. I offered Rumson Bullard the hand of friendship, but he bit it. My, my. You care for a bottle of iodine? No, Pee-Vee. He didn't really bite me. Well, why don't you take a bottle along in case he does bite you, then? What I'm trying to say is I had four tickets to the harness races and I gave Bullard two. Now he's taking Catherine Milford. Yes. I guess that's a horse on you, Mr. Gilder Sleeve. Yes, yes. Well, that was a little what it says on Mr. Gilder Sleeve. Horse races, horse on you. I got it, Pee-Vee. I just wanted to be sure. Yeah, that's Bullard. He starts pushing me around. He's going to get pushed back. Hard. Mr. Gilder Sleeve, if I may say so, you might take a page out of Leroy's book. You want this? Leroy and Pete Crawford were in here looking at the comic books. It seems they both wanted to read Jungle Jitters. You know. And Pete snatched the book out of Leroy's hand and Leroy said, I was just about to give it to you. I hope you enjoy it. Did it work? I'm here to tell you. The boys left the best of friends. Mr. Gilder Sleeve, why don't you go out to the races and sit next to Mr. Bullard and Miss Milford and do like Leroy? What do you mean, Pee-Vee? Say, I was just about to give her to you and see what happened. I wouldn't think of going out there. How would you like to have my tickets, Pee-Vee? Well, Mrs. Pee-Vee and I had thought of going, but tickets had been hard to get. Well, they're not hard to get for me. I have many cents. I give tickets to anybody. All I ask is, did you keep an eye on Bullard and Catherine? Mrs. Pee-Vee will do that. Nothing escapes Mrs. Pee-Vee. At least I didn't. Of course, I'm not really concerned about it, Pee-Vee. The only reason Catherine is going with him is because he asked her before I had a chance to. That could be. You bet. The only reason Bullard goes out with Catherine is because he's vain. He likes to be seen with a pretty woman. That's possible. There's no romance in Bullard's cold heart, Pee-Vee. He's more interested in stocks and bonds than he is in my girl. Well, I wouldn't say that. Pee-Vee, you're no help. There's Catherine's little ivy-covered cottage. Why am I walking past her house? I can't stop in. There's Bullard's car parked in front. They're probably getting ready to go to the harness races. They like to put a harness on Bullard and drive him out of the state. I wish that was my car waiting for Katie. See? He's got a flat tire. No, isn't that too bad? Wait a minute. That's not the right attitude. You should go and tell him about it. Let me find it out for himself. I don't tell him he might not get to take Catherine to the fair. Still, go to sleep. You've been giving Leroy advice. Why don't you practice what you preach? Sure. I'll go ring the bell and tell him. I'm being a fool again, but I'm a conscientious fool. Go to sleep. You, Mr. Bullock. Go to sleep. What are you doing to my car? Nothing. I was about to come in and tell you. Go to sleep. You let the air out of my tire. I did not. You did it in a fit of jealousy. You've been Mr. Bullock. Hard loser. Yes, but you want a buffalo. But you... Oops. I'll see you here, Bullard. Kill the sleeve, get down on your knees and fix that tire. I'll do no such thing. It has to be fixed, Kill the sleeve. What do you propose to do about it? I propose to go home and let you fix it yourself. Who does that Bullard think he is? I am. Hello, Leroy. You bet. I hope they all go flat. Ankh! You know what you're saying? I'm well aware of what I'm saying, and I mean every word of it. That Bullard had better keep out of my way, that's all. If he insults me once more, I'll flatten him like his tire. Oh, no, Ankh! Well, I will. Gosh. Who's the man? Ankh, I hate to say this, but I'm ashamed of you. Shame to me? Leroy. Yes, I am, Ankh. I'm ashamed of you. But my boy... Pete and I don't fight anymore. We're getting along fine. I took him to the movies, and he's helping me build my tree house. Well, I'm glad to hear that, Leroy. Now I come along and find you fighting with Mr. Bullard. As well. Gee, Ankh! What's a little kid gonna think? I'm sorry, Leroy, but Mr. Bullard has gone too far. He accused me of letting the air out of his tire. You wouldn't do a thing like that. Well, I didn't. Ankh, why don't you go back and help him fix it? What? Remember what you said? Make the first gesture. Oh, Leroy. That's what you told me to do. And I know I told you to do it, but... Ankh. Well, you're all right. I'll go. Attaboy, turn the other cheek. Turn the other cheek. I've turned it so much today, I feel like my head's on a swivel. If I'm not too late, Mr. Bullard, I'd like to help you change the tire. Thank you, Gildersleeve, but I just had the nasty job attended to. Well, although I didn't have anything to do with it, I guess I should apologize. No, no, Gildersleeve. It is I who should apologize. You? Apologize? Yes. Yes, I wronged you. In changing the tire, they discovered a broken sidewall. Broken sidewall? Yes, I remember hitting the curb a little hard when I pulled up here. Well, maybe you shouldn't have been so eager to see Catherine. Well, you know how it is, Gildersleeve. Yeah, I know. Wonderful girl. Wonderful. Gildersleeve, it was very sporting of you to come back and after help me under the circumstances. Well, thank you, Mr. Bullard. It's sporting of you to say so. Oh, not at all. Actually, Gildersleeve, I've been a cad. Well, it wouldn't be sporting of me to agree with you. No. You wouldn't. You're too decent for that. Yeah, thank you. Gildersleeve, you don't mind if I like you, do you? You don't know. Well, on the contrary, I'm delighted. And I like you if you don't mind. It makes me very happy. Well, time to be going. Ta-ta! Mr. Bullard is Rumson. Bye, Gildersleeve. Gilder? He called me Gildy and he said he's happy. Yeah, he should be happy as a date with my girl. So I wonder why he drove away. Yo, Catherine. Well, I was just on my way home, Catherine. Why don't you come in? Me? Well, I'd like to talk to you, too. And I don't want you to be late for the fair. You have a date, you know. I hope so. You hope so? Isn't Bullard coming back? It's Rockmorton. I know about your giving the tickets to Rumson. Mr. Peavey told me. Yeah, that. Well, I was just trying to teach Leroy to get along with his playmates. Oh. Yeah, you know, return good for evil. Turn the other cheek. You know, all that stuff. Did it work out? Well, it did for him. Leroy's happy. Pete's happy. Bullard's happy. And you? Yeah, I'm so happy I think I'll cry. It's Rockmorton. You're just like a little boy. Of course, you've been a good boy. And I think you'll be rewarded. Good. When? Right now. Right now? Come here, Rockmorton. Now then, Rumson has a board meeting and he can't go to the fair, so he dropped the tickets by... You did? Now I don't have an escort. Would you like to take me? Of course I would. You bet. I'll get the car. You wait right here. Just a minute. What's the matter? What are you going to do? I'm going to give you your reward. A kiss. By George, I think I will. The Great Gilder Sleeve will be with us again in just 30 seconds. If there were a list of what every well-stocked refrigerator should hold, I'm sure that list would include Velvita, Kraft's pasteurized processed cheese food. Golden Velvita tastes so good, and it's so good for you. Rich in important food values from milk that your whole family needs. And Velvita is digestible as milk itself. So make Velvita your handy helper, mother, for wholesome delicious snacks and sandwiches, and hearty hot main dishes too. Get it tomorrow. Velvita, the cheese food of finest quality, made only by Kraft. Time stand is almost full. Where are the seats, Rockmorton? Yeah, let me see. V, 6, and 7. Oh, here. You're right down this row, Ken. Excuse me. Pardon me, please. Excuse me. Coming through. Oh, watch it, Fatso. Who are you calling? Yeah, me. Sorry. Big feet. Well, here we are. At last. Yeah. Perfect seat, Rockmorton. You know what's so exciting? I've never seen a harness race before. Well, the race hasn't started yet. Where do the horses come out? It's a beautiful sight. By the way, weren't Mr. and Mrs. Peabee supposed to have those two seats next to us? Mm-hmm. Yeah, empty. Yeah, I guess they got sidetracked someplace. Well, it's better this way. You and I have the whole sex new ourselves. How lucky can a man be? Pardon me. Pardon me. Excuse me. Move the popcorn, madam. Pardon me. Look who's here. Hello, Catherine. You've bullied. Where'd you come from? My meeting was cancelled, Gildersleeve. Mr. Peabee couldn't get away, so he kindly gave me his ticket. I'll sit here beside you, Catherine. You and I can share my program. Oh, thank you. You sneaky neighbor. How lucky can a man be? Hey, Gildersleeve. Yeah, this is... Gildersleeve. Why are you peering about? Are you looking for someone? Yes. Oh, Leroy. Surely he isn't here. No, thank goodness. And since he isn't here, Ward, get out of the grandstand! The great Gildersleeve is played by Willard Waterman. The show is written by John Elliott and Andy White and is partially transcribed. Included in the cast are Walter Tetley, Mary Lee Robb, Lillian Randolph, Yale Gordon, Kathy Lewis and Dick LeGrand. Music was composed by Jack Meakin. This is John Heaston saying good night for the Kraft Foods Company, makers of the famous line of Kraft quality food products. Be sure to listen in next Wednesday and every Wednesday for the further adventures of the great Gildersleeve. Question. What's the best way to raid an icebox? Answer with Kraft prepared mustard, of course. Because when you add a little Kraft mustard to the sandwich you make, you add a lot of tang. And here's something for you professional icebox raiders to remember. There are two kinds of Kraft mustard. Salad mustard with that delicately spiced mild flavor. Ah, and then there's Kraft mustard with snappy horseradish added. Have both kinds on hand. 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