 Do you feel unseen or unheard when it comes to your parents and your depression? Oftentimes depression can feel like you're stuck in a maze with no idea how to get out. And sometimes all you want is for someone to hold your hand and show you the way. Some might hope that person would be a parent, the person who guides and nurtures them, helping them to get out of that dark place. But many teens don't have that kind of support and are instead faced with parents who don't quite understand their depression. They're instead dismissed and ignored, making their situation even worse. It can be frustrating, confusing, and quite lonely for a teenager. These years are a time of so much growth and change, and it can be hard to go through it without the support of your parents. The next few seconds have some stranger things spoilers, so if you haven't watched the new season yet, skip ahead. Spoiler alert. In the popular show, Stranger Things, Max, one of the main characters, shows signs of depression in the wake of one of the biggest traumas of her life. To make it worse, her mother is not entirely present and doesn't seem to understand or see what Max is going through. It is revealed that all she wants is some motherly reassurance and understanding, but she doesn't have that, which makes her feel even more alone. Many teens have situations parallel to Max's, with parents who don't quite see or understand. So if you're feeling lonely and ignored in your struggles, here are some signs you may relate to if your parents just don't understand your depression or have left you to fight it alone. Number one, your parents don't let you get professional help. Coming to terms with your depression and realizing that you're in such a dark place takes a lot of strength and courage. What takes even more bravery is admitting that you need help. Have you ever talked to your parents about seeing a therapist or a counselor, but they completely shut down the idea? They may not even listen to you or say you don't need it because you're fine. It can feel depleting and discouraging when your parents deny you of something that you know can make your life better. You may begin to feel out of place and like you don't belong in your own home since they don't understand what you need. It can also be dangerous because you're now left with untreated depression. So down the road, it's more likely to spiral into something more severe that can impact more of your life. Number two, they start to make jokes about your depression and manipulate your situation. Your parents might have told you before to open up and not be afraid to talk about your struggles. When you do though, you might find that your parents use your depression and problems as a spectacle for entertainment. A source of laughter instead of taking it seriously. They might unfairly bring it up in social situations in a humorous way to humiliate you and make you feel singled out. They might laugh and make a mockery of your depression with others. This shows your parents your situation as a source of fresh gossip and news to intrigue their peers, meaning they don't really take your depression seriously. They're using your real struggles as a way to direct attention onto themselves, somehow making it about them and leaving you to feel isolated and even more unsupported. Number three, your parents don't make changes in day-to-day life to support you with your depression. Do you live in a family that is constantly go, go, go? Whether it's different functions you all attend or extracurriculars, do you find that your family never stops moving? When you have depression, it's important to take a step back and slow down so you have time to heal. And as a teenager, it's important to communicate this to your parents so they can help relax your schedule. That way, they have more time to have meaningful conversation with you and see what you need. That being said, they might not understand the fact that you do need this break and instead continue to go about their daily lives. They may continue to drag and force you into these extra activities and are inflexible when all you really need is a break. When you're depressed, you're vulnerable, and this exhausting, strenuous routine can leave you feeling even more depleted and unfulfilled. Hicking breaks from your busy life is important so your body can reset and restore itself. When your parents aren't mindful of this, your busy life can continue to weigh on your shoulders and leave you feeling even more depressed. Number four, they make excuses for your depression. Have you ever actually reached out to your parents about your situation, only to be met with unrealistic theories as to why you have depression in the first place? It might seem like they're almost in denial, making up different excuses as to why you're feeling a certain way. They might say things like, no, you don't have depression, you'll feel fine in the morning. Or more commonly, your phone is making you sad, so put it away and you'll be happy. You also might be stressing about school and they'll say, we all have our struggles. These are all comments parents make when they don't understand depression and don't care to further learn what you're going through. They think that your struggles are just an act of drama and attention seeking or a strange teenage phase instead of an actual cry for help. We know that depression is not only directly caused by being on your phone and can be a product of other factors like trauma, chemical imbalances, conflict, stress, neglect, and more. Some parents refuse to open their eyes and look at the bigger picture of their child's struggle and instead stay constricted in the box they've spilt around them. Number five, every time your depression is mentioned they argue with you. Living with depression is exhausting and takes a lot of strength to overcome, so it's even more debilitating when there is added stress from conflict with your parents. When you bring up your depression to your parents, does the conversation somehow blow up into a massive argument and it's now somehow about them? They might even get offended that you brought up such a thing, saying that you're ungrateful for feeling such a way when they've given you a great life. They take the fact that you're feeling depressed as a personal attack against their parenting skills and argue with you about it. Even when you're dealing with the effects of your depression like fatigue, lack of motivation, and headaches, they might miss and not understand the fact that these are signs of depression and settle for the conclusion that you're lazy and bratty. This ignorance of your situation can spur anger in you and then escalate into an argument with your parents, and their lack of understanding can fuel your depression and further wear you down. Some parents may think depression is a choice and that the symptoms are a normal part of a teen's development. For example, they think a moody teenager is just a part of their growth. Due to this, parents may minimize concerning symptoms due to lack of knowledge. Sometimes parents are quick to assume teenagers do not have adult problems. Therefore, they think there are no valid reasons for teens to be depressed. They may be in denial because their image of a healthy child is being shattered, ignoring their child's depression because of feelings that they have failed as a parent. It's also possible that parents may be struggling with their own mental health problems themselves and can't take on their child's depression. Have you been noticing any of these signs with your parents? Do you think they struggle to understand your depression and instead fuel it and make it worse? If they do, try to reach out to another trusted adult or friend, like a school counselor, to get the support you deserve.