 The mutual broadcasting system in cooperation with Family Theatre Incorporated presents Wanted One Baby starring Kenny Baker and Alan Reed. Paul Henry is your host. More things are wrought by prayer than this world dreams of. Thanks for inviting us into your homes at this time. It's nice to know there are so many millions of families listening to Family Theatre each week. It's encouraging to know that your interest and your enthusiasm for the program have been responsible for its remarkable growth so that now it is heard on over 400 stations in the United States as well as in Canada and other parts of the world. Because you know Family Theatre is dedicated to your family, to all families. It is dedicated with the simple conviction that our homes are for us the most important places in the world and each of us has an important job to do in keeping our families together and happy. We join with so many of you in this conviction and in the conviction that family prayer brings a new understanding and harmony into your homes. Because with God's help, with the help of daily family prayer, our hearts are lighter, our homes are happier and that is given to our families a broader, brighter viewpoint of tolerance and understanding. We'll hear from Paul Henry again following tonight's Family Theatre story, Wanted One Baby starring Kenny Baker and Alan Reed. You may have never heard of Joe Stanley Page of Akron, Ohio. I met him myself for the first time the other day and we got to talking. This is his story. You see, here's the way it was. It all started last summer so maybe since then I've forgotten some of the details but I remember everything that's important. First of all, Betty, that's my wife. We'd been married four years and we wanted a Joe Stanley Page Junior, her juniors. We weren't particular in that respect but, well, we never did have one and then I remember it was the first of June. That morning we thought, I mean, she thought, well, we all got excited, you see. Joe, Joe, calm down, will you? I know there must be a million things a guy's got to do. Better finish your breakfast first, dear. No, no, I'll phone Doc Bennett. If you keep running around the house like a chicken with his head cut off, you'll be late to the office. Joe, where are you going? This is too important. I better stop by at Doc Bennett's. I'll arrange for him to see us at my lunch house. Joe, you forgot your hat and coat. Oh, thanks. Now look, honey, there isn't a thing for you to worry about. Not a thing. You leave everything to me. I'll fix it up with the doc and, yes, and then I'll tell old J.B. I have to have a long lunch hour. Boy, is he going to be surprised. Oh, I better get some cigars and I'll phone you later, honey, about the appointment with the doc. Now look, you don't have a thing to worry about, not a thing. But, Joe, just give me a kiss goodbye, honey, and leave everything to me. That's the way it started. But I might have known what would happen when I got to the office. J.B., he's the owner of the Oliver Tired Rubber Company where I work. Well, he was already at the office, all steamed up in one of his reorganizing moods. Paige, what am I paying you for? As office manager. You came here as office organizer. What have I got in my hands now? What, sir? Don't watch her, me. I want answers. But look, J.B., I'm not responsible for a slump in the selling department. You're responsible for the way our books are kept? Yes. Then you're responsible for a possible congressional investigation? A congressional investigation? On our government contracts. 70% of our business is with the government. That's all. We have congressmen roaming about this place poking into everything we're doing. But our books are all in order, J.B. Maybe you think so. Maybe they are. But our contracts depend on good organization. We can have an investigation at any time. We have to be able to show them how efficient we are. Well organized, you know. Fish and sea, that's what I want. Oh, no loopholes. Everything organized in detail. Yes, sir. Oh, J.B., I wanted to tell you that... Well, I want you to know that... I guess it wouldn't be important to you now. Paige, what's the matter with you? Oh, nothing. No, everything's fine. Yes, sir. You're acting very strangely. Well, I was just thinking about this investigation. Efficiency. Yes, sir. We'll give them all the efficiency in the world. Well, things finally settled down at the office, and I called Betty and told her the appointment with Doc Bennett was all set for one o'clock and that I'd meet her there. I don't remember what delayed me with all of the things that were happening that morning, but all it was nearly 1.30 when I got to the Doc's office. Nobody was around, so I went in and sat down. I just waited and kept thinking, oh, gee, this is... I heard Betty coming. I was so excited. I didn't know what I was going to say first. And then she saw me. And it, well, it was just the way she looked at me. I knew we'd been wrong. We had it all wrong. We weren't going to have a baby. I could see it in her eyes. On her whole face. I felt like going in and telling that Doc off. Well, gee, it wasn't his fault. Then I sort of smiled at Betty, but it wasn't much of a smile because there was a heavy feeling inside me. She smiled at me, but it was a sad little smile. We walked together as far as the corner. Neither of us had anything much we wanted to say aloud. I guess Betty knew I was thinking about getting back to the office because she said simply... Joe, I better run along. Yeah, see you later. I watched her go. I hadn't wanted to talk to let her know how down I was. But, well, four years we'd been married and talked about the family we were going to have. It's just that you plan things and they don't happen. It's more than a disappointment. It's like you were dreaming about something wonderful and suddenly you wake up. I started walking back to the office along the avenue where, you know, where the little church is. And as I passed the open door, it looked so warm and friendly inside. I just had to go in for a minute. You know, it was just one of those ideas that hit you sometimes. So I went in and knelt down in the back. Then I saw Betty. She was up in front and she had her head down. I didn't want her to see me, so I got up and left. I hadn't thought about being late until I walked through the outer office. And I saw the clock. I opened the door for the inner office, rather slowly hoping old J.B. wouldn't be around. But there he was, the old inner tube himself, ready for a blowout, sitting behind my desk and looking at his watch. Paige, at present you don't work by the hour, but such an arrangement can very easily be made. Oh, I'm sorry, J.B. I had to go to the doctor's. You're sick. No, sir, it was my wife. She's sick? No, sir, we... Well, why don't you have to go see a doctor for if you're not sick? Well, you see, I was going to have a baby. I mean... Splendid. I suppose you'll want maternity leave. My wife is going to have a baby. Anyway, we're not. Make up your mind, Paige. Are you or aren't you going to have a baby? We're not. Finally come to a decision. No, we didn't decide it. That doesn't surprise me one bit, Paige. I don't think you're capable of making a decision, which brings me to the issue at hand. Yes, sir. Unless you as office manager come to some decision as to what's to be done about the efficiency of this organization, you're going to be looking for a new job. I'm through talking. All right, sir. Now, look, maybe we... Shut up. I'm not through yet. I thought you said you were. I'm talking. That's what I thought you said. Well, when I said I was through talking, I meant that I... Oh, never mind. I'm giving you two weeks to get our inventory reorganized. Yes, sir. There are stockpiles in South Africa that you failed to record. I want everything about rubber in every part of the world in our statistics. Heap our files up to date. If it's about rubber, file it, label it. If it's about tires, put a tag on it. Want a tag on every tire. And I want action. We're going to have an investigation on our hands. Very least we can do is have something with investigating. Yes, sir. I'll find something. Get reorganized. Get some efficiency into this office, or get out. Yes, sir. Get organized. Get efficient. Get. Get. Get. Get. Get. The only thing I wanted to get was a Joe Stanley Page Junior. But it seemed like it wasn't in the cards. You know, sometimes it's a funny thing. But when one thing goes wrong, next thing you know, everything goes wrong. By the time I got home that night, I was so filled up, I couldn't think of anything to say to Betty. She couldn't either. I mean, think of anything to say to me. You know, that was the first night I ever remember it was that way with Betty and me. We just kind of moped around till bedtime, and then she went off to bed. I looked in at her once or twice, and saw her nearly down, saying her prayers. I took a long time getting ready for bed, so she'd be asleep when I came in. I had some very important business to take care of. None of this jumping into bed mumbling a few prayers while I was half asleep. No, sir. Not this time. I wonder if this is what J.B. would call being efficient. He knows how to do his ring buzzers all day, put a tag on something. I'd like to see him run an office and a doctor. What does he know about efficiency? Congressional investigation. I'll investigate him. Hey, what am I worrying about J.B. for? I got problems of my own. Yes, sir. Well, this time I'm going to kneel down and do it right. Our father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done. Honour as it is. Hello? Yes, this is the big nursery. Yes, this is the place where babies come from. Yes, all babies are handled through this office. What? Most certainly not. I cannot possibly divulge that information. Oh, I beg your pardon. How did you get in here? Well, I'm not quite sure. Whatever you want, my secretary, Miss Pelham, will take care of you. Well, I don't think she can. You see, I came here to... Look, Mr... Page, Joe Stanley Page. Look, Mr. Stanley Page, I'm a busy man, busy man with the biggest job in the world in my hands, and I just haven't got time to talk to you. Pelham? Yes, J.B.? Pelham, contact South Africa immediately. Something has got to be done about the Silver Spoon stockpile. It's been depleted for weeks. Some big babies are being born all over the world without Silver Spoons in their mouths. Reports are beginning to pile up. It was even mentioned in Congress the other day. We may have a congressional investigation in our hands, if we're not careful. I want action, Pelham, action. I want it fast. Over. Roger enough, J.B. You talk just like a man I work for. He's a man of action, too. Oh, are you still here? Yeah. All right, all right. What do you want? Now, state your business quickly. I'm a busy man, busy man. Well, you see, I'm here on a kind of special investigation. And I... Too many... Special investigation? Yeah. Great heavens. Congress. Well, now, Congressman, why didn't you say so in the first place? Anything at all I can do for you, Congressman? Page. Yes. Joe Stanley Page. Yes, Mr. Page. What can I do for you? Well, I wanted to see about a baby. Baby? Ah, yes, the babies. Well, now, it's mighty big order. We have a lot of babies, you know. Matter of fact, we have all of them. Yes, I suppose you know who's going to have babies. Yes, indeed I do. We have file and everything. A tag for every baby. That's our motto. Oh. Good morning, J.B. Good morning. I didn't know you had company. Good morning, young man. Hello. Joe, this is Dr. Jones. Dr. Jones at Congressman Page. Joe Stanley Page. Well, it's good to see a young fellow like you around here, Joe. You just call me Doc. Thanks. Say, do you take care of all the babies, Doc? No, Joe. No, not all of them. I just take care of a few. I'm sort of a specialist around here, right, J.B.? Yes. Now, Doctor, if you don't mind, I'm busy discussing the organization. Did you want something? No, nothing much. I'll take care of it. You just go right on with your discussion. No, no, Doctor. You're not going to make any changes in today's quota. Well, just a couple little changes. Nothing to worry about, J.B. See you later, son. Sure, Doc. See you later. Oh, there, Joe, is the fly and the efficiency ointment of this office. He seems like a nice old guy. Yes, well, I don't like to say this, but I'm really convinced that this place will run like clockwork if it were for Doctor Jones. Oh, what does he do? He upsets everything. If I could tell you the nights we've spent going over and over the books, I only hope this investigation will show him up. You can judge for yourself, and I'm sure you will. Oh. Excuse me. Yes, Pelham? Checking on today's quota, J.B.? Check. Baby scheduled to be born as of tomorrow for Europe, Asia, and Africa. Total, 9,682. Check, 9,682. South America and Oceana. 8,103. Check, 8103. North America. Oh, by the way, J.B., for Mr. and Mrs. Hopkins, Long Island, fractional time, 7.16 p.m., a set of twins. Check. Twins. Double check. I like that double check. North America. Let me see. These figures are a bit confusing. You mean they don't balance, Pelham? Well, we're trying to do our best. Oh, it's Doctor Jones. He's muddling and meddling again. What kind of statistics can we be expected to keep? I'll go over the books again. Check. Check. Roger and out, J.B. We'll never get our baby's balance as long as that fella's around. You mean Dr. Jones? Oh, oh, oh. You're still here. Yeah. Let's see. Let's see. What was I saying? Well, you were going to... Right, right. Now come this way, Congressman. I'll give you an idea the way our organization functions. Oh, swell. Maybe now I can find out how to reorganize things. Reorganize on the contrary, Congressman. I think you'll find out how our organization is working with machine-like precision. Yes. Now over here, we have the nursery proper. All of those little babies in the outbasket check for immediate delivery. Ah. Ah-ha. Oh, aren't they cute? Cute? Yeah, I suppose they are. As I was saying... Hey. Hey. There's something wrong here. Something wrong. Yeah, sure. Look, they... Oh, I know what it is. Babies cry. These babies aren't crying. Oh, that. Well, you see here, well, babies don't cry. They don't? No, they don't have anything to cry about yet. Oh. Now over here in section 12C, we... Dr. Jones, what are you doing? Now, let's see. I'll take this one here and that set of twins over there and this little fella down here in front. Jones, what are you up to now? You're nothing at all, J.B. I'm just picking up a few babies I need. Oh, there's the one I've been looking for. Have you gone through the proper card files? No, J.B., you know I never bother with details. Do you realize that you're completely destroying any system I have around this place? Oh, I wouldn't say that, J.B., and you'll never miss these few. Oh, look at all you've got left. Yes, sir, that's the one I want all right. Congressman Page, now you see what I mean. Can't you do something about this? Christ, Doc, he is a cute little fella, isn't he? Or is he a she? He's a he, Joe. Oh! And I know a couple of kids over in Brooklyn that why they're going to be mighty happy with this little rescue. Yeah, I guess so, Doc. Say, maybe you can tell me... Congressman, I can tell you anything you want to know. That's right, Joe. J.B. knows everything there is to know about this place. He's got an excellent system, too. And why don't you abide by it? Yes, sir, his system is real handy. Sometimes. Great help to me. Well, now, if you gentlemen will excuse me, I've got to see about getting these babies Stork Plain Passage to take them to their new home. Stork Plain Passage? Roger. See, we keep pace with the times, efficiency. Well, but where is Doc sending all those babies? Heaven only knows. He just comes and goes as he pleases around here. Special orders from the boss. Walk, try it in, pick out whatever babies you want and send them to whoever he wants to send them. Goes against the whole system. Say, maybe I ought to talk to him. I certainly wish you would. Now, Congressman, perhaps you would like to take a look at our master file. Oh, eh, am I in it? Oh, I certainly, everybody's in it. Would you like to see it? I sure would. All right, just come with me. Good. As the master file, Congressman, the backbone of our organization. You mean, all anybody has to do is just take a look at this file and all the information is there for him to see? Yes, only, of course, anybody can't do it. In fact, nobody can do it. This file is classified ultra-secret. Not just anybody comes into this room only a very select personnel. You're an exception, of course. Oh, I am? Naturally, man. Your position has every right in the world to come here for information. Oh, I'm glad I found that out. But, of course, no one else would. Hello, JB speaking. Oh, it's you again. No. No, no, no. How many times do I have to tell you? I'm sorry, I cannot possibly give out that information at this time. Goodbye, Mr. Winchall. As you can see, I'm constantly harassed for information. I never let it interfere with the roots of you, no, no. Yes? JB. Yes, Miss Pelham? It's the doctor again. He put 14 more baby passengers on the Stratastork. And there just isn't enough room, JB. I don't know what I'm going to do. Jones again. Miss Pelham, call American Airlines. Schedule an extra flight immediately. Well, Roger and out, JB. I just don't know how he does it. Every one of his babies gets priority one. Oh, he knows somebody, Congressman. He's got the inside track around here. Oh, I don't get it. Anyway, what I want to know is, could I see my file? Well, they're strictly confidential, but I think we might be able to do you that little favor. Oh, fine. At first I was thinking this trip was a useless one, but if you're going to... Of course you'll give our establishment a good recommendation and return. Oh, I always have, and I always will. I think babies are the finest thing in the world. Well, it's good of you to give us that kind of a recommendation, Congressman. Now, let me see your world. Here we are, Western Hemisphere, United States. I'd be watching the D.C., of course. Oh, no, Akron, Ohio. Akron, Ohio. That's my home. Oh, yes, yes, of course, your home city. Let's see, Akron, Ohio. Here we are, Team Packard, Padden, Paganini, Page, Page. Now, Joseph Stanley Page. Wife Elizabeth Page, right? That's us. Well, then. Yes, yes, here you are. Is your tag, Congressman? Oh, that's very kind of you. Hey, wait a minute. What's trouble? This tag. It doesn't have anything on it. Are you sure? Turn it over. No, it's blank. Yeah, let me see. Yes, that's right. Yes, it's blank, all right. Well, well, does that mean... Yes, that means you're not going to have any babies. Oh, well, could there be a mistake? Please, there has never been a mistake, including all the time I've been running this organization. You're sure? How can I? I guess I shouldn't have... I'm sorry, of course, but you must realize we try to please everyone, but sometimes we just can't meet the demand. Yeah, I know. Now, if there's anything else you'd care to see... No, no, thanks. I guess I'll be going along. Sorry, you were disappointed about the baby, but besides... Hey, baby, where's that young man? Oh, here you are, Joe. Yeah. Uh, hi, Doc. I've got a big surprise for you, son. What kind of a surprise, Doc? Well, you tell me, Joe, what would you like more than anything else in the world? Joe's Stanley Page Jr. Only I ain't gonna get one. You're not, eh? Who says so? The file. Joe! Uh, doctor, that is, I... I took the liberty of showing the congressman his file. His tag, unfortunately, is blank. Uh, uh, I think we can fix that up. Well, you do? Yes, yes. You see, my boss, who's in charge of antranol-righteous desires, he sent down a new list just now, and Joe... Yeah? We can't think of anyone who meets our requirements better than you and Betty. You're on it. I am? You're gonna get that, baby, Joe. I am? I mean, we are? Sure you are. But I don't understand the file. Don't you worry about the file, Joe. I mean, it's gonna take care of you. It is! But, I mean, what's your department? Oh, I guess JB here didn't tell you exactly what I do around here. I told him how you upset the entire system. Oh? Yes, I suppose I do. And, uh, the system's all right in its place. But sometimes, well, it takes more than a system to get what we're after. And that's really my department, Joe. You see, I take care of a very special bunch of babies. A special bunch? Yes, Joe. The babies that are prayed for. Oh. Oh! Oh, I get it! You see, Joe, it comes in kind of handy now, and then makes you understand there's someone somewhere who's a little bigger and kinder than a system. Yeah, but, Doc, how about the baby? He is. You must know what we have in mind, don't you? You bet I do, son. You want something small and tender and human, Joe. Yeah. Something with the breadth of new life and new hope. Yeah. Equipped with the little fixtures of smiles. And blue eyes, Doc. Betty's got the nicest blue eyes. La-da-dee, and good night. Those blue eyes close tight. Bright angels are near. So sleep with us. From half their dreamland, sweet child. Sing it. Hmm? I guess I must have... Oh. Oh, well. Thanks a lot, just the same, Doc. That's just the way it happened. And I figured maybe I really had an idea worth remembering, so I kept on hoping, even though sometimes Betty laughed at the idea. But she was wrong. Yeah, it's Joe Stanley Page, Jr., and he has blue eyes like Betty, too. This is Paul Henry again. You know, during the play, I was thinking about the way it sometimes happens that everything seems to go wrong. I mean, you have a definite plan of what you want and how you think... how things should go. But despite your best efforts, you can't make things go right. And in families, it happens that way, too. Homes break up. Nobody ever planned it that way because everybody starts out planning a happy home. But happiness can't be all of our own making. We need God's help. Yes, all of us do. And we can have that help simply for the asking. Ask and you shall receive. That's the power of prayer. That's the wonderful help that every home can have through family prayer. Daily family prayer means God is there in your home. It means the joy of sharing your happiness with others. It means God's blessing on your home. And with God's blessing, the family that prays together stays together. Before saying good night, I'd like to thank Kenny Baker and Alan Reed for their performances this evening. Our thanks to Francis Rickett and Dan Rodden for writing tonight's play and to Max Stair for his music. This production of Family Theatre Incorporated was directed by David Young. Others who appeared in tonight's play were Marlowe Dwyer and Doris Butler. Next week, our Family Theatre stars will be Gloria Dehaven and Richard Hart in Eddie Meadster Family. Your host will be Hogi Carmichael. This is Paul Henry saying good night and God bless you. This series of the Family Theatre broadcasts is made possible by the thousands of you who felt a need for this kind of program and by the Mutual Broadcasting System which has responded to this need. Be with us next week at this same time when our Family Theatre stars will be Gloria Dehaven and Richard Hart with Hogi Carmichael as host. Tony LaFranco speaking. This is the Mutual Broadcasting System.