 The Kraft Foods Company presents Harold Perry as the Great Gilder Sleeve. The Great Gilder Sleeve is brought to you by the Kraft Foods Company makers of Par-K Margarine. Every day, millions of women all over America serve Par-K Margarine because it tastes so good. To market, to market, to get some Par-K. Home again, home again, try it today. You like it, you love it, like millions who say their favorite margarine is Par-K. Par-K Margarine, P-A-R-K-A-Y, it's wonderful. And now let's get in step with the Great Gilder Sleeve as he surges toward his office. We'll have to move right along to keep up because the great man has geared himself to a fast pace this morning. Good morning, Bessie. Good morning, Mr. Gilder Sleeve. We got here promptly at nine. As I told you, you may come in, pad, and pencil. Yes, sir, I have them. You must be alone, Bessie. No interruptions. Yes, sir. First of all, I want to thank you for coming down on Saturday morning. But there's work to be done. It's piling up. Yes, sir. One pile toppled over, so I made it into three piles. Well, we'll clear the desk, bing-bing. Mr. Gilder Sleeve, before we get started, well, just so I get out before the store is closed at six, I have to pick up some little things. Now we better get going then. Start at the bottom. Where is it? The pile on your left was the bottom. Oh, eh, should have known. Nothing worse than musty envelopes. Phew! Smells like a glue factory. Open the windows. That won't be necessary. My correspondence isn't that old. Now let's see. I'll read the yellowest one first. Dear Mr. Gilder Sleeve, a group of public-minded citizens in the third district met last night and discussed the annoying problem of insufficient water pressure. And unless you... Anxiously awaiting your reply. Well, let them wait. Anxiously. Throw it away. Yes, sir. Well, there's another letter from them in a second pile. That came this year. Ah? Chronic complainers, eh? Pay no attention to them. Yes, sir. Oh, well, let's read something on the brighter side. Dear Water Commissioner, if that's what you call yourself, hee. Looks like a hard day, Bessie. Yes, sir. Hold that one, I'll have to think it over. Now then, where were we? We threw one away and we're holding the other. Yes, that's pretty discouraging, Bessie, dealing with the public. Here I come down full of pep, even on Saturday, and get absolutely no cooperation. Makes a man wish he'd stayed at home. Right here waiting, Mr. Gildesley. Oh, I don't mean you, Bessie. I'm talking about the consumers. Disatisfied, grumbling, not a healthy sign, Bessie. Oh, well, the thing to do is to send them all copies of our water supply report. That explains everything in an optimistic way. Well, I've got this year's report right here. Better send them last year's, it's much better. Get last year's, will you, Bessie? You took it home with you last spring, Mr. Gildesley. Last spring? Are you sure? Yes, sir. That other day we were so busy. Remember? Well, there's nothing we can do here, Bessie. I run home and find that report. That means the whole morning is shot. Yes, sir. Better make it snappy. Shall I wait here, Mr. Gildesley, on Saturday? Better run along and do your shopping, Bessie. We'll get a fresh start Monday. Finding those reports may take quite a little while. Business, business. What are them reports you was talking about? Neither could I, Bertie. Completely wore myself off looking for the darn things. That's why I sped out here on the couch. Got sleepy glancing over the newspaper. Says cold wave coming in. Early storms predicted in local areas. Where's that? Right here, Bertie. Well, I don't know where else to look for them reports. Well, they'll turn up. Keep searching, Bertie. I'll tell you, Mr. Gildesley, but I've already turned this house upside down. You don't have to tell me. I can see that. I'm sorry the place looks this way, Mr. Gildesley, but this is my day to sew. I was just giving the house a lick and a promise. Well, lick it clean. Let's keep the promise. I've noticed things have been allowed to slide around here lately, Bertie. If things were kept ship-shaped, my reports wouldn't be missing. It's high time we clean house. When, Mr. Gildesley? Now, Bertie, today. Clean up and tighten up the house before winter comes. What about the mending? That can wait. We can sit and sew when the wind's hauling outside. Where are the children? Some in Marjory and Leroy, the living room. I have to say, concerns everyone. Yes, I'll go call them. Never mind, Bertie. I'll see you in... Just a minute, Leroy. Where do you think you're going? Out to play. It's Saturday. No school. I know, but there's work to be done, just the same. Ah, gee, I'll give him my teacher says Saturday's for recreation. You always said she knows best. Five days a week, my boy, yes, but on Saturday, I'm as smart as she is. No polish off my dresser again. I know who did. The cover wasn't on tight. Hello, Uncle Mort. Leroy's been into my nail polish again. I know he has. I didn't use hardly any. Leroy, let's see. Have you been covering him up instead of digging him out? I just gave my turtle a manicure. What? What? Leroy, the next time you see my nail polish... Now, now, this is no time for family squabbles. We should be banding together children with a common cause in mind. That's why I call this meeting. What meeting? Gosh! The one you're now in. But it's Saturday outside. The one day to have fun. You'll have fun doing this if you'll enter into it with a proper spirit. I knew it. Work. But I'm... Now, see here. A man gets up early in the morning, slaves like a dog at the office, so he can get home and plan things out with his family. And what does he get? Nothing but arguments. Now, sit down, both of you, and listen to me. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Birdie? Yes, I've been listening. Now, then, this is our little home. Yours, Marjorie, yours, Leroy, yours, Birdie, and mine. Not just a place to eat and sleep, or a place to run in and out of? Our little home. It doesn't look like anybody lives here. At least not people. Everything around here is topsy-turvy thrown heller-skeller. Nothing in this proper place. No system. I think it looks fine in here, don't you, Birdie? It does not. Look at those old magazines screwing all over that window seat. What are they? Good housekeepers. Well, clear them out. Clean upstairs and downstairs. Out with the old dust in with the new. Marjorie, must you fix your nails while I'm speaking? Well, I have to fix my nails. I have to look nice. You want me to make a good impression on Ben, don't you? My dear, if you really want to make an impression on Ben, you show him how well you can clean a house. That's what impresses men. Is that what impresses you about women, Uncle Mort? That's beside the point. I'm older. Now, let's get everything ship-shaped before winter comes. What we need around here is the old pioneer spirit. Come along with me, Miss Marjorie. Maybe we better put up some preserves and smoke a couple of hands. It looks like a long... Yes, yes. Well, there's a man's work to be done outside. Come along, little man. Aw, what are we going to do outside? We're going to get up on the roof and clean the leaves out of the gutters. Storm warning in the paper, my boy. Looks like it might rain any minute. But the leaves haven't even started falling this year. We can get up there and clean off last year's leaves. Now, let's see. Hose, broom, ladder, rake. What a way to spend Saturday. Good for us, my boy. Lots of fresh air up on the roof. Good exercise. Come on. I'll hold the ladder. What? You want me to go way up there alone? But, Uncle, I'm just a little kid. What if I should fall? Nonsense. You're not afraid. A big boy like you. Now, get up that ladder or you go to bed. Can I go to bed through the upstairs window? No, you can't. I'll get up there. But, Uncle, you said... But don't you remember when I climbed up there last year for my football? You said I should never do it again. Huh? You're right, my boy. This is a man's job. I'll do it myself. Ah, gee, you're wonderful. I'll see you in. Wait a minute, Leroy. There is a job you can do. You clean up the yard and burn that old pile of trash. Now, get busy. There's no place to burn it. Unless I use Mr. Bullard's back a lot. Oh, boy, can I, Uncle? Not a bad idea. Taking our junk over to Bullard's. Might as well get up there and get it over with. Wash the leaves down with this hose. That's the way to do it. Let's see. Shut off the water at the nozzle. Great thing to control water at a nozzle. Now, turn it on at the tap. I have the job done in jig time. Turn it the wrong way. There. Now, fireman, how do you get up a ladder with a hose? Eh, tie it around my stomach? Nozzle in my pocket. Eh, I'm all set. Are you big, beautiful blonde, fireman, give a sleeve to the rescue? Nothing, birdie, nothing. Up we go. Homie's too close to the rungs. Better lean back a little. Tricky ladder. At last. The shingles look awfully slippery though. If I can just get a toe hold. You see, almost took me down with it. Knocked a few shingles loose. I can see right through the roof. Have to get that fixed. Not at all this junk get up here. Orange peels. Tennis ball. Good thing I'm cleaning it off. What's this? Empty milk bottle. I'll toss it down and get my two cents back. Oh, well, what's two cents? Hey, what's what you're doing? Who's that? Don't shoot so many more bottles at me, gilder sleeve. Oh, it's you, Mr. Bullard. I didn't see you, sorry. Yes, I'll bet you are. I'm not going to stand for any more of this, gilder sleeve. Well, you won't have to. That's the only bottle up here. What kind of a neighbor are you anyway? Neighbor? What are you talking about? You know very well. You had the appropriate to send that measly little nephew of yours to my place to burn your confounded rubbish. Leroy is my nephew, but he's not measly. Well, you don't think my place is. I don't know. It's not a junk yard, you know. Gilder sleeve, you're a public nuisance. It will make up your mind, and see you here, Bullard. You chimney-sweet. Oh, have a care, and I'll come down off this roof. You wouldn't care. Oh, I wouldn't. You're just saying that because I haven't got a ladder. Gilder sleeve, I'll call your bluff. I'll put the ladder up for you. Don't you touch that ladder. And don't you lay a hand on Leroy. Now get off the property. I will. And you keep your junk all fine. Big coward. Should have turned the hose on him. Oh, well. Gotta get on with the job. What's the trouble here? No water pressure. Running harder than that in my pocket. Something must have happened at the reservoir. That Charlie Anderson. I better go down and phone him. No ladder. Buddy! We'll be back with a great Gilder sleeve in just a minute. You know, as the Parquet reporter, I try to find out how the Somerfield people feel about Parquet margarine made by craft. Now the other day, I met Leroy on the street. Leroy, I said, how do you like Parquet margarines? Well, why? Well, I just want your opinion. Now, what do you like most about it? I don't know. It just tastes good. Do you realize that Parquet is a craft product, and that means it's a quality product? Yeah, I guess so. Sure does taste good. And do you realize that each pound of Parquet contains 15,000 units of vitamin A, and that vitamin A is one of the most important of the vitamins? Well, it tastes fine. And what about the smooth richness of Parquet? You ever notice that? I don't know. I guess so. Most of the time I'm so busy eating and tasting, I don't think about other things. How am I eating? Oh, now you're not being very helpful, Leroy. I'm trying to find out what one thing makes you like Parquet margarine. Well, like I said, I like the taste of it so well, I just don't stop to think why I like it. Well, there you are, friends. Leroy feels pretty much the same way that millions of women all over America feel. They serve Parquet margarine because it tastes so good. Try Parquet for yourself. That's Parquet margarine, P-A-R-K-A-Y. It's wonderful. Now let's get back to the great Gildersleeve. He spent an arduous morning preparing to wash the leaves off his rooftop with a garden hose only to discover at the crucial moment that the water pressure was down. It's only natural that we should find him on the phone trying to discover what goes on at the reservoir that he doesn't know about. Find state of affairs and in my own water department. Well, I'll turn on some pressure. Charlie, I understand the reservoir, speaking. Commissioner Gildersleeve, Charlie. Oh, you're so cold-mined. Charlie, why is it we don't have any water pressure up here? Same dad busted reason I got knocked down here. That's no answer. Well, ye gods, man, get the pressure up. A thing like this is bad for the department. You know what's wrong, Commissioner, as well as I do. Same old trouble with the dad busted snifter valve. That's no excuse. You've always had trouble with your snifter valve, Charlie. Uh, let's not get personal, Commissioner. Uh-uh, Charlie, don't be like that. Just get the pressure up. Or I'll get myself another boy. Hope you didn't hear that. Oh, well. Outside already? Well, no, Marjorie. I thought I'd relax a second until Charlie gets the pressure up. I'm not in here. It isn't dry yet. Well, the den then, I guess. Don't worry. Just six years old. Well, there's always the hall couch. Coming through, wonky rugs. And don't light there. I'm cleaning the hall next. Don't worry. I'm going. Who's going? I'm going. George, I'll get down to P.V. and get some cigars. Driven out of my own house. Pushed around, run over. I'm nobody. I just pay the bills around here. That's all. And you'd think somebody would clean this car for me sometime. Hey, y'all, can I go? No. Mr. Bullard was pretty mad about me burning the trash on his back a lot, huh? Who told you you could carry matches, young man? Matches? I've been carrying them for five years. Hereafter, don't. Unless you get permission for me first. Permission? To carry matches? Get out of the way. Get out of the way. I've got to back out. I'm backing the car through a jungle. I have to get the clippers after him pretty soon. I think I'll turn up the street instead of down. Ooh! Damage done, I hope, Mr. Can you again, gilder sleeve? Oh, Bullard. Gilder sleeve, how far do you think you can go with me? Just look at my fender. Look at it. You'll pay for this. Just a minute, Bullard. Who's to say who's at fault? It's perfectly obvious to me, gilder sleeve. Look how you're turning. Going up the wrong side of the street. You always turn the other way. I've watched you. Peeping Tom. I believe you did this deliberately. I'm not a well man, gilder sleeve. My nerves. And this isn't doing them any good. I may be suffering from shock. Let's talk this over, Bullard. Arbitrate. That's the way to settle these things. Gilder sleeve, you can arbitrate with my lawyers. Yee! Gilder sleeve? I'm already done for, PB. Today has been one of those that try men's souls. Give me a couple of my cigars, PB. That's what you say, Mr. Gilder sleeve, but if I was shaking the way you are, I'd watch my smoking. When I need advice along that line, I'll consult somebody who knows what he's talking about. I'll give you your change and you can go consult him. I'm sorry, PB. I'm kind of on edge. Nerves. I just witnessed a horrible accident. Two men backing out of their driveways. Horrible thing. Dented one of the fenders. Doesn't sound too horrible. You just don't know, PB. You've never dented anybody else's fender. I wouldn't say that. Scratched one once. Did he sue you, PB? I'm asking this for a friend. You see, this friend of mine was in the accident with not a friend of mine. Oh, now I have it clear. Was anybody hurt? No. Well, as I see it, Mr. Gilder sleeve, there's no reason for you to be quaking like an aspen. You didn't see it, PB. You weren't there. I understand that, but it sounds pretty much like the time I scratched the party's fender. Who paid? What happened? It was a very flurry of excitement, but it all blew over in a few minutes. By the next day, everybody had forgotten about it. Everybody in that is except Mrs. PB. Oh? I wouldn't worry about your friend if I were you, Mr. Gilder sleeve. PB, you're right. By George, I'm making mountains on a molehill. It was an unavoidable thing. Nobody was hurt. What have I got to... What has my friend got to worry about? Well, PB, I'll be running along home. Well, bang the way, Mr. Gilder sleeve. I wonder if you'd mind dropping this prescription off at Mr. Bullard's house. Bullard? Is he? Confined to his home, suffering from shock, they say. PB, I'm not taking anything to Bullard. God's, I've got to find George Booker. Well, no. What's the matter with him, I wonder? I wonder what's taking Hooker so long. I sent him over to Bullard's an hour ago. They'd be making a deal behind my back for all I know. I wouldn't put it past him. Anything can happen in a lawsuit. I'll take everything I've got. Poor Marjorie. Little Leeroy. Thrown out of our home just when we made it snug for the winter. There he is, the old turncoat. Well, Gildy. Don't well-guildy me. It's about time, Hooker. It took him a little longer than I thought. Well, what'd you find out? A number of things came to light which have a direct bearing on the case, Gilder sleeve. Things you're not aware of, apparently. But nevertheless, they're important. There's only one important thing about a lawsuit, Hooker. Who pays? Well, I'm coming to that. I might say that after conferring with Mr. Bullard and examining all the evidence, it was comparatively easy to place the blame where it belonged. I knew it. Go ahead, Hooker. Tell me I haven't got a leg to stand on. Admit you don't want to represent a loser. Gilder sleeve, you know I never kicked a dog when he was down. I'm no dog, Hooker. This isn't the first time we've been on opposite sides of the fence. I'll admit that we've had our differences in the past. She doesn't live here anymore. Trouble with you, Gilder sleeve, is that you won't listen to reason. I've heard enough, Hooker. Now get out. All right. You aren't going to let me explain that Bullard hasn't a case. There's nothing for you to worry about. There isn't? There's nothing to worry about? Well, sit down, Horace, old friend. Would you like to stay for dinner? That's better. You've been ranting like a wild man. Forgive me, Horace, I wasn't myself. When a man is standing in the shadow of a lawsuit for things like shock... The only shock Bullard had was when he found out the accident was his fault. Oh? I knew it all the time anyway. Go on, Horace. Well, we discovered that his brakes didn't work. Leaky brake drum. Leaky brakes, eh? Well, a leaky brake. Horace, you old goat. Why didn't you tell me? Good eye. Do I hear something dripping? Must be Bullard's leaky brakes. Look, there's a puddle right on the floor. Water! And another on the davenport. What? Gildy, your roof's leaking. Oh my goodness, the storms have come and the roof isn't ready. Judge, get some pants. Get a button. It's a flood. Oh, Gildy. Probably the Red Cross. And the pants. Gildy, look outside. The sun is shining. Oh my goodness, the hose. I left it up on the roof. Out of the way, judge. I've got to get that hose out of there. I'm going to answer the phone. This is Bullard's fault. I'll sue him. Hello. Here from the Great Gilder Sleeve again very soon. Every day, millions of women all over America serve parquet margarine because it tastes so good. Try it soon. Before yourself, how good parquet tastes when you're spread it on bread, toast and rolls. It's true. Every day, millions of women all over America serve parquet margarine because it tastes so good. Look first for the margarine of craft quality. Parquet margarine made by craft. To market, to market to get some parquet. Home again, home again. Try it today. You like it, you love it like millions will say. That margarine is parquet. Parquet margarine, P-A-R-K-A-Y it's wonderful. My lads, just look at this living room and right after I spent the whole day cleaning. It wouldn't have happened if Uncle Mort had suddenly decided to get everything snug for the winter. Well, we sure look like we're standing in the middle of some mighty tough weather. Now, Birdie, Marjorie I'll assume full responsibility. I'll straighten up the room myself. I'm going to lift a finger. Birdie, you run right along and see about dinner. All right, Miss Guilty. Let's see. A rug is soaked. You and I better roll it up and take it outside to dry, Marjorie. Where's Leroy? Here, Uncle. Grabbing in, my boy. Wet rugs pretty hard to handle. Okay. Wait a minute. What's this? Old papers under the rug. Leroy. I didn't do it. That's some of your stuff. What's this for? The water supply report. Oh, what, huh? Well, it's the best we've got. Well, this is important. Better take it right down to the office. Uncle Mort on Saturday night and leave the living room looking like this? Well, you and Birdie give it a lick and a promise, my dear. I got business to attend to. Good night, folks. The Great Gilder Slave is played by Harold Perry. It is written by John Elliott and Andy White with music by Jack Meakin. It is cast by Walter Tetley, Louise Erickson, Lillian Randolph, Earl Ross, and Richard Legrand. This is John Walde saying good night for the Kraft Foods Company, makers of the famous line of Kraft quality food products. Good night. Listen in next Wednesday and every Wednesday for the further adventures of The Great Gilder Slave. Have you tried tabstep? It's a cheese food that's really different, rich in mellow cheddar cheese flavor, easy to serve in a variety of tempting ways. Tabstep spreads easily for sandwiches and snacks, melts smoothly into rich golden cheese sauces, slices in a distinctive way, for tabstep can be cut into neat wedges when chilled for serving with fruit or pie desserts. Why not buy both varieties of this delicious nourishing cheese food? Ask for Golden Cheddar Tabstep or Pimento Tabstep. P-A-B-S-T-E-T-T. Tabstep Cheese Food. This is NBC, the national broadcasting company.