 You know as you make your way in this world you're going about your day-to-day life trying to do the best you can Maybe you're working on your goals, or you're just trying to survive and trying to Make sense of these feelings that come up for you on a daily basis The quick message I'm going to give you in this video here today is I can promise you one thing And that is that you're not alone in this you are not alone in these difficult feelings and I know that's kind of like a Such a cliche really it was like people say it so often that it kind of loses all meaning But you can take it from me that I know for a fact that these difficult feelings that you're having right now You're not going through this by yourself in my view pretty much pretty much everybody's going through something and It's the same Attracted feelings maybe they're in your body. Maybe they're in your stomach. Maybe it's in your chest or your neck And you have all sorts of different emotions. I Do want to give you one maybe a tip that could be helpful if you're feeling something right now That's an intense negative emotion and it's something I might talk about in future videos because it's such a Such a key to understanding why these we get triggered and these feelings stay with us for so long Because getting triggered is not the problem. We all get triggered getting triggered is very very normal part of life All these feelings are normal But it's how long we stay triggered how long that negative emotion stays in our body that's really The yardstick for measurement in this, you know You want to be staying maybe in the past you were getting upset by things and it would stay with you for a week You know that negative emotion that intense negative feeling So we start to do work on ourselves and hopefully you begin to notice look yeah, I'm still getting triggered But it's staying with me for a few days now rather than a week or a day or maybe a matter of hours. Hopefully Or even less than that So what I would say is this No matter what the feeling you have in your body Cognitive therapies is useful for a lot of these things and you know process of inquiry Just questioning those thoughts and it's kind of a process of the intellect really but eventually you do all this work and The goal of it really is to take you out of this and down into this So it's you begin to realize you become skeptical of the egoic way of thinking or the the limited perception We have of things and you begin to just have it have a realization of there is a Part of me now that doesn't really fully believe the stories. I tell myself when I get triggered and We begin to be skeptical of those stories and begin to realize You know what? I'm going to skip the inquiry at this point I'm going to skip doing the the exercises and the things I've learned maybe not always but occasionally and I'm just going to go directly down into this or this the feeling that's with me right now And why is it so hard for us to do that? Well, here's the thing Next time you feel like that or if you're feeling like that right now I want you to check with yourself and see Is there a subtle feeling? It's very subtle usually So you need to be present with the feeling that's there and just check Do you have underneath that emotion that disturbance that contraction that's there? any subtle feeling of guilt a Lot of people I'll ask that to and they'll say no initially And when we stay with it a little bit longer It it comes out it shows itself and it's something like it can often be things like I Want this feeling to go away something's wrong The feeling I have now is wrong Go a little bit deeper with it. It we usually discover something like yes this feeling is wronged or something wrong with this and I need to do something to fix this feeling in other words I am responsible for this feeling or it's my fault. I feel like this That's what I mean by guilt So that guilt story can make it So much more difficult for the feeling to just come into the body or rise up and to eventually be felt and just pass Over pass through Here's another cliche that a lot of people use and it's something like you know it's it's okay not to feel okay and I Guess that's what I'm saying here, but I don't want it to come across like the same little cliche you've heard probably a thousand times before it's It's a process. It's not it's not just some statement you hear or something or a cliche It's you go in and you check with the feeling and you you become mindful or aware of any feeling of judgment towards the emotion That's there. It's so pervasive and it makes the releasing process of these feelings a lot more difficult as soon as you become aware of yeah, I am actually resisting this emotion I am Judging it or trying to get rid of it or blaming myself for having it or there's a story that there's something wrong with me for feeling like this Become aware of that Just start to notice it And even that Will will just you'll notice straight away The feeling will just ease up. It'll relax a little bit and it'll start to move a little And it's that story that makes it hard to to to to process the emotion So you become aware of it and you can you can just See it as a perspective. Thank you for for that perspective You can just thank that guilt story. It's no need to fight with it It's just an awareness of it and thank you for that perspective. It's more of a noticing of it. I Notice that there's some guilt there. That's interesting. You just become a noticeer of these things That guilt story Relaxes and the feeling whatever the upset is whether it's anxiety whether it's a feeling of sadness or betrayal or isolation or loneliness There's usually a subtle judgment towards that feeling So I want you to bear that in mind next time it comes up and I hope this video is helpful for you right now as you watch it Thanks so much and I'll talk to you again soon