 wanted to do something really festive for Thanksgiving and I couldn't get my boyfriend I mean my girlfriend to dress up as a turkey so I thought what would be more festive than eating a bunch of vegan dog shit so let's take a look at this tofurky and I actually had to stop by three different supermarkets to find this thing first I went to Whole Foods I was like listen Whole Foods has got to have this nonsense and I go to like the frozen meat aisle and there's this middle-aged lady you know talking to this worker there he's like oh my god I can't believe you guys are out of tofurky on Thanksgiving my vegetarian daughter can you please like go in the back and check for this so I was like oh great now now what I'm not gonna even be able to find this stupid thing so I dropped to another grocery store and then the third one had it actually you know I felt like an idiot holding this at the checkout line but it's kind of funny because I'm like this this jacked out of my mind chiseled out of stone you know Italian guy holding this this bullshit what was even more ridiculous is when I got home and I opened this thing up and I was like huh there's more than just this turkey nonsense here and you know man all the the vegan boys are gonna get real excited for this if you know what I mean so we also get a cheesecake which doesn't doesn't look too happy but I guess I guess vegans need their sweets so what are you gonna do and then we have our gravy slop as well this comes frozen I thought it all out and in regards to preparation we have to roast this for an hour and 20 minutes and apparently we have to baste it with soy sauce oh of course more seasoning and more sugar dairy-free cheesecake prep thought in the refrigerator 24 hours prior to consumption serve chilled simple enough I'm gonna glaze this hunk of shit with some soy sauce and then we'll look at the ingredients while it's in the oven while even half soy sauce so I guess we're just gonna roll with the olive oil like it says oh don't worry about these eggs they're completely vegan you know the the animals are fed corn and soy so we're good to go what is this like some type of like cage for this plant-based demon turkey how hard is this to get out do they have to imprison it so it doesn't poison anyone on its own what's going on here oh man I don't know what these things smell like man anymore it's like some odd combination of chemicals and Thanksgiving spices so we got this some olive oil on it I'm gonna pop this in the oven at 350 and again for those of you guys saying Frankie boy you're wasting money one less person was poisoned on Thanksgiving so the demons in the oven I shackled it to the oven rack so it doesn't you know escape or anything and then the oven doors lack shut so we should be safe you know as soon as it awakens from its frozen slumber you know we don't have to worry about being attacked so let's check out the ingredients of each of these things roast ingredients vital wheat gluten modern wheat very inflammatory has 42 chromosomes you know compared to past strains of wheat like chorus on wheat has 28 chromosomes iron corn wheat has you know 14 the more heirloom variety the grain is the less inflammatory it is in this case you know modern red winter wheat damages your gut lining so much compared to these other you know types of wheat products you know if you've ever gone to Italy and had pasta and don't have stomach issues that explains why organic tofu you know which is water organic soybeans magnesium chloride and calcium chloride honestly it's it's probably not too bad because it's mostly a protein component but we do know there's no mega six concern with soybeans you know there's various chemicals that are used to process it as well as the actual estrogenic properties and anti-nutrient properties of soy you know soy is pretty much the pinnacle of anti- nutrients you know from phytates it even has oxalates I believe phyto astrogens very bad for you expeller pressed canola oil omega-6 very bad very inflammatory not good no semblance of nutrients has natural flavors sea salt and then about 15 different seasonings to make it taste like you know food and it's interesting they have a whole mineral profile here you know they add magnesium calcium potassium and salt to try to replicate the elements and mineral profile of a natural food stuffing ingredients water brown rice bread cubes enriched wheat flour molten barley flour and a bunch of fortified ingredients so brown rice you know we got to have an arsenic or pollution concern again rice is a start it's kind of hard on digestion hard to break down my gut bacteria bread cubes more inflammatory wheat but no this is reinforced wheat and niacin iron thiamine riboflavin folic acid a big underlying issue in modern American diets right now is iron overload from all of these iron fortified foods not to mention the synthetic forms of these vitamins aren't good for you and then in that stuffing are about a dozen other spices and ingredients that are attempting to make it taste good you know from sunflower oil to cane sugar to maltodextrin I don't know how anyone can read the ingredient list and put this stuff in their mouth it's crazy gravy ingredients water whole wheat flour man if you had any like intolerance to wheat or gluten a whole man this would destroy you soy sauce canola oil natural flavors again 15 20 different seasonings again a lot of these ingredients are really being repeated over and over again in each of these I'm just thinking of some sad like and I think I said this the other week like some sad middle-aged person at home enjoying their toe furky plant-based feast beside their family while uh while the rest of their family is eating actual real food who puts tofu and cheesecake what what is wrong with these people cheesecake ingredients organic tofu cane sugar expeller pressed canola oil all of I swear to God all of these foods have the same ingredients in them it's just slightly altered ratios and they form it into a different shape pea protein flour cocoa powder fava bean protein and then 2% of vanilla extractives coffee lemon juice lemon oil lime juice lime oil sea salt arugula apple cider vinegar citric acid fermented corn sauce modified wings of cheesecake cross brown rice flour coconut brown sugar cocoa powder so yeah there's a lot of ingredients in here you know overall the wheat very inflammatory any type of soy or vegetable seed oil horrible for you every single one of these you know plant additives or plant extracts each of those foods can be addressed on an individual basis for their anti-nutrient profile I just can't believe that people genuinely think tofu and vegetable seed oils are healthy and this is probably the biggest thing going on right now we have been led to believe you know I can't believe it's not butter all of these things you know the saturated fat dogma it's still very strong in our modern culture people think that these foods are healthy but it's unfortunately the opposite you know it's literally the quickest way to a grave would be to eat this shit every day Tofurky gravy just got to warm this up on the stove top and we got our cheesecake too so I guess I'll take the stuff out start a new tradition without even trying if you do something twice in a row it's officially a tradition if this is your first Tofurky roast dinner congratulations you're halfway to a brand-new tradition it's good for our animal friends good for the planet and good for a sandwich the next day how sad is this shit Tofurky plant-based holiday feast fork friendly at least vegans know they won't have to use their blenders anymore honestly guys I'm starting to get a little bit scared of vegan food and I'm getting discouraged from doing these videos but you know I didn't have like as I said you know my my girlfriend didn't want to dress up as a turkey and I couldn't find like a pilgrim outfit or something cool for Thanksgiving so I guess this is what we're doing the Candida demon has been banished to the netherworld using prolonged omega-6 fatty acid oxidation unfortunately now we have to eat the vegan dildo so let's get it chopped up smells like soy sauce how sad is that all right so I guess let's get our little Thanksgiving feast together well here we go I don't know why I do this for you guys I guess a part of me is always curious you know from a culinary perspective how bad this shit tastes I guess if you go long enough without eating something you put about anything down your throat I really don't know how to describe the texture of this it's like pudding with a crust drop dry pudding with a crust is a good textural description it really tastes like a loaf of bread it's so stupid he's fucking vegan these vegan morons are paying $15 for a loaf of bread then again I guess I'm the real moron here all right I guess let's give the stuffing a shot the stuffing tastes like soft bread with some spices in it I guess I should try the gravy on its own oh god why do I do this tastes like some Chinese sauce gone wrong let's put some gravy on this hunk of demon shit and see what it tastes like the thing is they add so many spices seasonings salt sugar soy sauce that's all it tastes like you essentially have a blank slate they add enough seasoning till it's somewhat palatable and then they throw it on a plate I honestly feel bad for anyone that's eating this tomorrow I really do or well today the video the day is published let's dive into that cheesecake of course it's got to be a chocolate cheesecake because vegan I guess I guess you can't make a vegan cheesecake right I guess it would have to be a chocolate cheesecake because there's you know there's no way to really make a vegan cheesecake because you know cheese is being oh my god that's so sweet that tastes like really cheap shitty chocolate cake mix if you swallow that in men oh man you feel like death for three days it's like chocolate frosting it's so sweet I can see though I can see how you know vegan you know eat this whole shitty meal stuffing yourself full of vegetable seed oils carbs you're still hungry so then you have to macro dose yourself with like a bunch of sugar and even more vegetable seed oils it's absolutely absolutely crazy that they're able to serve this food to people or sell this food to people so the ingredients are poison it tastes like overseas into chemical poison and I guess I'm gonna you know maybe I'll feed this to the skunk in my backyard maybe it'll poison him and I won't I won't get bothered anymore so thank you guys for joining me if you could please like the video definitely subscribe if you haven't hit that bell icon share the video if you can if you guys would like to support me further definitely check out Frankie syringe meat high quality nutrient dense animal foods at an affordable price you can also go to Frankie's nationals for minimal ingredients minimally processed hygiene and cosmetic products if you'd like to reach out to me for one-on-one health consultations shoot me an email frank a to final at gmail.com thank you guys for joining me today and enjoy your Thanksgiving fuck this man