 Volume 9, Chapter 2 of Cecilia. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. Recorded by Valli. Cecilia, Memorials of Inheiris by Francis Burney. Volume 9, Chapter 2, A Surprise. Greater Margaret's Townhouse was in Soho Square, and scarcely had Cecilia entered it before her desire to speed her departure made her send a note to each of her guardians, acquainting them of her arrival and begging, if possible, to see them the next day. She had soon the two following answers. Two Ms. Cecilia Beverly, These November 8, 1779, Ms. Received yours of the same date, can't come tomorrow, will Wednesday the 10th a.m. and see Briggs. Ms. Cecilia Beverly, Two Ms. Beverly, Mr. Del Weil has too many affairs of importance upon his hands to make any appointment till he has deliberated how to arrange them. Mr. Del Weil will acquaint Ms. Beverly when it shall be in his path to see her. St. James Square, November 8, These characteristic letters, which at another time might have diverted Cecilia, now merely served to torment her. She was eager to quit town. She was more eager to have her meeting with Mr. Del Weil over, who, oppressive to her even when he meant to be kind, she foresaw now he was in wrath, would be imperious even to rudeness. Desirous, however, to make one interview suffice for both and to settle whatever business might remain unfinished by letters, she again wrote to Mr. Briggs, whom she had not had the spirits to encounter without absolute necessity, and informing him of Mr. Del Weil's delay begged he would not trouble himself to call till he heard from her again. Two days passed without any message from them. They were spent, chiefly alone and very uncomfortably. Mr. Mountain being content to see little of her, while he knew she saw nothing of anybody else. On the third morning, weary of her own thoughts, weary of Lady Margaret's ill-humoured looks, and still more weary of Miss Bennet's parapsychical conversation, she determined for a little relief to the heaviness of her mind to go to her bookseller and look over and order into the country such new publications as seemed to promise her any pleasure. She sent, therefore, for a chair, and very glad to have devised for herself any amusement set out in it immediately. Upon entering the shop, she saw the bookseller engaged in close conference with a man meanly dressed and much muffled up, who seemed talking to him with uncommon earnestness, and just as she was approaching said, To tell them indifferent, for writing is no labour to me, on the contrary, it is the first delight of my life, and therefore, do not for dirty pelf, I wish to make it my profession. The speech struck Cecilia, but the voice struck her more. It was bell-fails, and her amazement was so great that she stopped short to look at him without heeding a man who attended her, and desired to know her commands. The bookseller, now perceiving her, came forward, and bell-filled, turning to see who interrupted them, started as if a spectre had crossed his eyes, slapped his hat over his face, and his tilly went out of the shop. Cecilia, checking her inclination to speak to him, from observing his eagerness to escape her, soon recollected her own errand, and employed herself in looking over new books. Her surprise, however, had a change so sudden in the condition of this young man, and at a declaration of a passion for writing, so opposite to all the sentiments which he had professed at their late meeting in the cottage, awakened in her a strong curiosity to be informed of his situation. And after putting aside some books which she desired to have packed up for her, she asked of the gentleman who had just left the shop, and who, she found by what he had said was an order, had written anything that was published with his name. No, ma'am, answered the bookseller, nothing of any consequence. He is known, however, to have written several things that have appeared as anonymous, and I fancy now, soon we shall see something considerable from him. He is about some great work, then. Why, no, not exactly that. Perhaps at present, we must feel our way with some little smart Judas spirit before we undertake a great work. But he is a very great genius, and I doubt not will produce something extraordinary. Whatever he produces, said Cecilia, as I have now chanced to see him, I shall be glad you will at any time send to me. Certainly, ma'am, but it must be among other things, for he does not choose just now to be known, and it is a rule in our business never to tell people's names when the desire to be secret. He is a little out of cash just now, as you may suppose by his appearance. So, instead of buying books, he comes to sell them. However, he has taken a very good road to bring himself home again, for we pay very handsomely for things of any merit, especially if they deal smartly in a few touches of the times. Cecilia chose not to risk any further questions, lest the knowledge of him should be suspected, but got into her chair and returned to Lady Margaret's. The sight of Bellefield reminded her not only of himself. The gentle Henrietta again took her place in her memory, whence her various distresses and suspences had off late driven from it everybody but Delweil, and those whom Delweil brought into it. But her regard for that amiable girl, though sunk in the busy scenes of her calamitous uncertainties, was only sunk in her own bosom and ready upon the removal to revive with fresh vigor. She was now indeed more unhappy than even in the period of her forgetfulness, yet her mind was no longer filled with the restless turbulence of hope, which still more than despondency unfitted it for thinking of others. This remembrance thus awakened, awakened also a desire of renewing the connection so long neglected. All scruples concerning Delweil had now lost their foundation, since the doubts from which they arose were both explained and removed. She was certain alike of his indifference to Henrietta, and his separation from herself. She knew that nothing was to be feared from painful or offensive rivalry, and she resolved therefore to lose no time in seeking the first pleasure to which, since a disappointment, she had voluntarily looked forward. Early in the evening, she told Lady Margaret she was going out for an hour or two, and sending again for a chair was carried to Portland Street. She inquired for Miss Belfield and was shone into a parlour where she found her drinking tea with her mother, and Mr. Hobson, their landlord. Henrietta almost screamed at her sight, from a sudden impulse of joy and surprise, and running up to her flung her arms round her neck, and embraced her with the most rapturous emotion. But then, drawing back with a look of timidity and shame, she bashfully apologized for her freedom, saying, Indeed, dearest Miss Beverly, it is no want of respect, but I am so very glad to see you, it makes me quite forget myself. Cecilia jammed at a reception so ingeniously affectionate, soon satisfied her doubting diffidence by the warmest thanks that she had preserved so much regard for her, and doubling the kindness with which she returned her caresses. Mercy on me, madam, cried Mrs. Belfield, who during this time had been busily employed in sweeping the hearth, wiping some slops upon the table, and smoothing her handkerchief and apron. Why the girls enough to smother you? Henri, how can you be so troublesome? I never saw you behave in this way before. Miss Beverly, madam, said Henrietta, again retreating, is so kind as to pardon me, and I was so much surprised at seeing her that I hardly knew what I was about. The young lady's mam, said Mr. Hobson, have a mighty way of saluting one another till such time as they get husbands, and then I'll warrant you they can meet without any salutation at all. That's my remark at least, and what I have seen of the world has set me upon making it. This speech led Cecilia to check, however atlas, the tenderness of her fervent young friend, whom she was much seized by meeting in such company, but who seemed not to dare understand the frequent looks which she gave her expressive of a wish to be alone with her. Come, ladies, continued the facetiers, Mr. Hobson, what if we were all to sit down and have a good dish of tea, and suppose Mrs. Belfield, you was to order us a fresh round of toast and butter. Do you think the young ladies here would have any objection? And what if we were to have a little more water in the tea kettle, not forgetting a little more tea in the teapot? What I say is this, let us all be comfortable. That's my notion of things. And a very good notion too, said Mrs. Belfield, for you who have nothing to wax you. Ah, ma'am, you have heard, I suppose, about my son. Gone off, nobody knows where, left that Lord's house where he might have left like a king, and gone out into the wide world nobody knows for what. Indeed, said Cecilia, who from seeing him in London concluded he was again with his family. And has he not acquainted you where he is? No, ma'am, no, cried Mrs. Belfield. His never once told me where he is gone, nor let me know the least about the matter. For if I did, I would not taste a dish of tea again for a twelve-month till I saw him get back again to that Lord's. And I believe in my heart, there is never such another in the three kingdoms, for he has sent here after him, I dare say, a score of times. And no wonder, for I will take upon me to say, he won't find his fellow in a hurry, Lord, as he is. As to his being a Lord, said Mr. Hobson, I am one of them that lay no great stress upon that, unless he has got a good long purse of his own, and then to be sure, a Lord knows that thing. But as to the matter of saying, Lord, such a one, how do you do? And Lord, such a one, what do you want? And such a sort of compliments, which in my mind, it's a mere nothing, in comparison of a good income. As to your son, ma'am, he did not go the right way to work. He should have begun with business, and gone into pleasure afterwards. And if he had but done that, I'll be bold to say, we might have had him, at this very minute, drinking tea with us over this far side. My son, sir, said Mrs. Belfield rather angrily, was another sort of a person than a person of business. He always despised it from a child, and come of it what may. I'm sure he was born to be a gentleman. As to his despising business, said Mr. Hobson very contemptuously. Why so much there was? For business is no such despisable thing. And if he had been brought up behind a counter, instead of dangling after these same lords, why he might have had a house of his own over his head, and been as good a man as myself? A house over his head, said Mrs. Belfield, why he might have had what he would, and have done what he would, if he had but followed my advice, and put himself a little forward. I have told him a hundred times to ask some of those great people he lived amongst for a place at court. For I know they have so many, they hardly know what to do with them. And it was always my design from the beginning that he should be something of a great man. But I never could persuade him, though for anything I know, as I have often told him, if he had but a little courage, he might have been an ambassador by this time. And now, all of a sudden, to be gone nobody knows where. I am sorry indeed, said Cecilia, who knew not whether most to pity or wonder at her blind folly, but I doubt not, you will hear of him soon. As to being an ambassador, ma'am, said Mr. Hobson, it is talking quite out of character. Those sort of great people keep things of that kind for their own poor relations and cousins. What I say is this, a man's best way is to take care of himself. The more those great people see you want them, the less they like your company. Let every man be brought up to business, and then, when he is made his fortune, he may walk with his hat on. Why now, there was your friend, ma'am, turning to Cecilia, that shut out his brains without paying anybody herself. Pray how was that being more genteel than standing behind a counter and not owing a shilling? Do you think a young lady, cried Mrs. Belfield warmly, can bear to hear of such a thing as standing behind a counter? I'm sure if my son had ever done it, I should not expect any lady would so much as look at him. And yet, though I say it, she might look a good while and not see many such persons, let her look where she pleased. And then, he has such a winning manner into the vibe game, that I believe in my heart, there's never a lady in the land could say no to him. And yet, he has such a prodigious shyness. I never could make him own, he had so much as asked the question. And what lady can begin first? Why now, said Mr. Hobson, that would be out of character another way. Now my notion is this, let every man be agreeable, and then he may ask what lady he pleases. And when he is a mind of a lady, he should look upon a frown or do as nothing. For the ladies, a frown in courtship as a thing of course. It is just like a man swearing at a coachman. Why, he is not a bit more in a passion. Only he thinks he shan't be minded without it. Well, for my part, said Mrs. Belfield, I'm sure if I was a young lady, and most especially if I was a young lady of fortune, and all that, I should like a modest young gentleman, such as my son for example, better by half than a bold swearing young fellow that would make a point to have me whether I would or know. Ha ha ha! cried Mr. Hobson. But the young ladies are not of that way of thinking. They are all for a little life and spirit. Don't I say, right young ladies? Cecilia, who could not but perceive that these species were leveled at herself, felt offended and tired, and finding she had no chance of any private conversation with Henrietta, arose to take leave. But while she stopped in the passage to inquire, when she could see her alone, a footman locked at the door, who, having asked if Mr. Belfield lodged there, and being answered in the affirmative, begged to know whether Ms. Beverly was then in the house. Cecilia, much surprised, went forward and told him who she was. I have been ma'am, said he, with a message to you at Mr. Mountain's in Soho Square, but nobody knew where you was, and Mr. Mountain came out and spoke to me himself, and said that all he could suppose was that you might be at this house, so he directed me to come here. And from whom, sir, is your message? From the honorable Mr. Del Weil ma'am in St. James Square, he desires to know if you shall be at home on Saturday morning, the day after tomorrow, and whether you can appoint Mr. Briggs to meet him by 12 o'clock exactly, as he shan't be able to stay above three minutes. Cecilia gave an answer, as called as the message, that she would be in Soho Square at the time he mentioned, and aquained Mr. Briggs of his intention. The footman then went away, and Henrietta told her that if she could call some morning, she might perhaps contrive to be alone with her, and added, Indeed, I wish much to see you, if you could possibly do me so great an honour, for I'm very miserable and have nobody to tell so. I miss Beverly, you that have so many friends, and that deserve as many again. You little know how hard it is to have none, but my brother's strange disappearing has half-broke our hearts. Cecilia was beginning a consolatory speech, in which she meant to give her private assurances of his health and safety, when she was interrupted by Mr. Albany, who came suddenly to the passage. Henrietta received him with a look of pleasure, and inquired why he had so long been absent, but, surprised by the sight of Cecilia, he exclaimed without answering her, Why did thou fail me? Why appoint me to a place, thou worth quitting thyself? Thou thing of fair professions? Thou invader of esteem? Thou vain deluse of promissor of pleasure? You can tell me too hastily, said Cecilia, if I failed in my promise it was not owing to capris or insincerity, but your real and bitter misfortune, which incapacitated me from keeping it, I shall soon. However, nay, I'm already at your disposal, if you have any commands for me. I have always answered he commands for the rich, for I have always compassion for the poor. Come to me, then, at Mr. Montens in Zoho Square, cried she, and hastened into her chair, impatient to end a conference which she saw excited the wonder of the servants, and which also now drew out from the parlour Mr. Hobson and Mrs. Belfill. She then kissed her hand to Henrietta and ordered the chairman to carry her home. It had not been without difficulty that she restrained herself from mentioning what she knew of Belfill when she found his mother and sister in a state of such painful uncertainty concerning him. But her utter ignorance of his plans joined to her undoubted knowledge of his wish of concealment made her fear doing mischief by officiousness and think it wiser not to betray what she had seen of him. Till better informed of his own views and intentions. Yet, willing to shorten her suspense so uneasy to them, she determined to entreat Mr. Monten would endeavor to find him out and acquaint him with their anxiety. That gentleman when she returned to his house was in a state of mind by no means enviable. Missing her at tea, he had asked Miss Bennet where she was and, hearing she had not left word, he could scarce conceal his chagrin. Knowing, however, how few were her acquaintances in town, he soon concluded she was with Miss Belfill, but not satisfied with sending Mr. Delweil's messenger after her. He privately employed one in whom he trusted for himself to make enquiries at the house without saying whence he came. But, though this man was returned and he knew her safety, he still felt alarmed. He had flattered himself from the length of time in which she had now done nothing without consulting him. She would scarce even think of any action without his previous concurrence. And he had hoped by a little longer use to make his counsel become necessary, which he knew to be a very short step from rendering it absolute. Nor was he well pleased to perceive by this voluntary excursion a struggle to cast off her sadness and a wish to procure herself entertainment. It was not that he desired her misery, but he was earnest that all relief from it should spring from himself. And though far from his pleased that Delweil should lose his sovereignty over her thoughts, he was yet of opinion that till his own liberty was restored, he had less to apprehend from grief indulged than grief allayed. One could but lead her to repining retirement. The other might guide her to a consolatory rival. He knew well, however, it was as essential to his cause to disguise his disappointments as his expectations, and certain that by pleasing alone he had any chance of acquiring power, he cleared up when Cecilia returned, who as unconscious of feeling, as of owing any subjection to him, preserved uncontrolled the right of acting for herself, however, desirous and glad of occasional instruction. She told him where she had been and related her meeting Belfield and then happiness of his friends, and hinted her wish that he could be informed what they suffered. Mr. Moncton, eager to oblige her, went instantly in search of him, and returning to supper, told her he had traced him through the bookseller who had not the dexterity to parry his artful inquiries, and had actually appointed him to breakfast in Soho Square the next morning. He had found him, he said, writing, but in high spirits and good humour. He had resisted for a while his invitation on account of his dress, all his clothes, but the very coat which he had on being packed up and at his mother's. But when laughed at by Mr. Moncton, for still retaining some forgery, he gaily protested what remained of it should be extinguished, and acknowledging that his shame was no part of his philosophy, declared he would throw it wholly aside, and in spite of his degradation, renew his visits at his house. I would not tell him, Mr. Moncton continued, of the anxiety of his family. I thought it would come more powerfully from yourself, who having seen, can better enforce it. Cecilia was very thankful for this compliance with her request, and anticipated the pleasure she hoped soon to give Henrietta by the restoration of her brother so much loved and so much regretted. She sent mean time to Mr. Briggs the message she had received from Mr. Del Weil, and had the satisfaction of an answer that he would observe the appointment. End of Chapter 2 Volume 9 Chapter 3 of Cecilia This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org Recorded by Walli Cecilia Memorials of Inheris by Francis Burney Volume 9 Chapter 3 A Confabulation The next morning, while the family was at breakfast, Bellefield, according to his promise, made his visit. A high colour overspread his face as he entered the room, resulting from a sensation of grief at his fallen fortune and shame at his altered appearance, which, though he endeavoured to cover under an air of gaity and unconcern, gave an awkwardness to his manner and a visible distress to his countenance. Mr. Moncton received him with pleasure and Cecilia, who saw the conflict of his philosophy with his pride, dressed her features once more in smiles which, however faint and heartless, showed her desire to reassure him. Miss Bennet, as usual, when not called upon by the master or lady of the house, sat as a siffer. And Lady Margaret, always disagreeable and repulsive to the friends of her husband, though she was not now more than commonly ungracious, struck the quick feeling and irritable bell-field to where an air of rude superiority meant to reproach him with his disgrace. This notion which strongly affected him made him, for one instant, hesitate whether he should remain another in the same room with her. But the friendliness of Mr. Moncton and the gentleness and good reading of Cecilia seemed so studious to make amends for homorousness that he checked his too ready indignation and took his seat at the table. Yet was at some time before he could recover even the assumed vivacity which this suspected insult had rubbed him off sufficiently to enter into conversation with any appearance of ease or pleasure. But after a while, soothed by the tensions of Cecilia and Mr. Moncton, his uneasiness wore off and the native spirit and liveliness of his character broke forth with their accustomed energy. This good company, I hope, said he, addressing himself, however, only to Cecilia, will not so much mistake the thing as to criticise my address of this morning, since it is perfectly according to rule and to rule established from time immemorial. But lest any of you should so much air as to fancy shabby what is only characteristic, I must endeavour to be beforehand with the malice of conjecture and have the honour to inform you that I am enlisted in the Grubb Street Regiment of the Third Story and under the tattered banner of scribbling volunteers, a race which, if it boasts, not the courage of heroes at least equals them in enmity. This coat, therefore, is merely the uniform of my cops and you will all, I suppose, respect it as emblematical of wit and erudition. We must at least respect you, said Cecilia, who thus gaily can sport with it. Ah, madame, said he more seriously, it is not from you I ought to look for respect. I must appear to you the most unsteady and coward-hearted of beings, but lately I blushed to see you from poverty, though more worthily employed than when I had been seen by you in affluence. That, shame, vanquished, another equally narrow took its place and yesterday I blushed to game that you detected me in a new pursuit, though I had only quitted my former one from a conviction it was ill-chosen. There seems in human nature a worthlessness not to be conquered, yet I will struggle with it to the last and either die in the attempt or dare seem that which I am, without adding to the miseries of life, the sting, the envenomed sting of dastardly false shame. Your language is wonderfully altered within this twelve-month, said Mr. Mountain, the worthlessness of human nature, the miseries of life, this from you, so lately the champion of human nature and the panigairist of human life. So, with my personal disappointment answered he, I may perhaps speak with too much acrimony, yet ultimately my opinions have not much changed. Happiness is given to us with more liberality than we are willing to confess. It is judgment only that is dealt us sparingly, and of that we have so little, that when felicity is before us we turn to the right or left, or when at the right or left we proceed straight forward. It has been so with me, I have sought it at a distance amidst difficulty and danger when all that I could wish has been immediately within my grasp. It must be owned, said Mr. Mountain, after what you have suffered from this world you are warned to defend. There is little reason to wonder at some change in your opinion. Yet whatever has been my suffering he answered, I have generally been involved in them by my own rationales or caprice. My last enterprise especially from which my expectations were highest was the most ill-judged of any. I considered not how little my way of life had fitted me for the experiment I was making, how irreparably I was innovated by long sedentary habits and how insufficient for bodily strength was mental resolution. We may fight against partial prejudices and by spirit and fortitude we may overcome them, but it will not do to war with the general tenor of education. We may blame, despise, regret as we please, but customs long established and habits long indulged, assume an empire despotic, though their power is but prescriptive. Opposing them is vain, nature herself when forced to side is not more elastic in her rebound. Will you not then, said Cecilia, since your experiment has failed, return again to your family and to the plan of life you formally settled? You speak of them together, said he with a smile, as if you thought them inseparable, and indeed my own apprehension that would be deemed so has made me thus fear to see my friends, since I love not resistance, yet cannot again attempt the plan of life they would have me pursue. I have given up my cottage, but my independence is as dear to me as ever, and all that I have gathered from experience is to maintain it by those employments for which my education has fitted me, instead of seeking it injudiciously by the very road for which it has unqualified me. And what is this independence, cried Mr. Mountain, which has thus bewitched your imagination? A mere idle dream of romance and enthusiasm, without existence in nature, without possibility in life? In uncivilized countries or in lawless times, independence for a while may perhaps stark abroad, but in a regular garment, it's only the vision of a heated brain. One part of a community must inevitably hang upon another, and it's a fast to call either independent, when to break the chain by which they are linked, would prove destruction to both. The soldier wants not the officer more than the officer the soldier, nor the tenant the landlord, more than the landlord the tenant. The rich owe their distinction their luxuries to the poor, as much as the poor owe their rewards their necessaries to the rich. Man treated as an ottoman, answered Belfill, and considered merely with respect to his bodily operations may indeed be called dependent, since the food by which he lives, or rather without which he dies, cannot wholly be cultivated and prepared by his own hands. But considered in a nobler sense, it deserves not the degrading epithet. Speak of him then as a being of feeling and understanding, with pride to alarm, with nerves to tremble, with honor to satisfy, and with the soul to be immortal. As such, may he not claim the freedom of his own thoughts, may not that claim be extended to the liberty of speaking and the power of being governed by them. And when thoughts, words, and actions are exempt from control, will you brand him with dependence in merely because the grazier feeds his meat and the baker nets his bread? But who is there in the whole world? said Mr. Monkton, extensive as it is, and as similar as are its inhabitants, that can pretend to assert his thoughts, words, and actions are exempt from control. Even their interest, which use so much disdain, interferes not, though there that is, I confess I cannot tell. Are we not kept silent where we wish to be reproved by the fear of offending? And may it speak where we wish to be silent by the desire of obliging? Do we not bow down to the scoundrel as low as to the man of honour? Are we not, by mere forms, kept standing when tired? May it give place to those we despise and smiles to those we hate? Or if we refuse these attentions, are we not regarded as savages and shut out of society? All these, answered Belfield, are so merely matters of ceremony that the concession can neither cost pain to the proud nor give pleasure to the vain. The bow is to the court, the attention is to the rank, and the fear of offending ought to extend to all mankind. Homage, such as this infringes not a sincerity, since it is as much a matter of course as the dress that we wear, and has as little reason to flatter a man as the shadow which follows him. I no more, therefore, hold deceitful for not opposing this pantonymical parade, than I hold him to be dependent for eating con he has not sown. Where, then, do you draw the line? And what is the boundary beyond which your independence must not step? I hold that man, cried he with energy, to be independent who treats the great as the little and the little as the great, who neither exalts and riches nor blushes in poverty, who owes no man a groat, and who spends not a shilling he has not earned. You will not indeed, then, have a very numerous acquaintance if this is the description of those with whom you purpose to associate. But is it possible that you imagine you can live by such notions? Why the Carthusian in his monastery? Who is at least removed from temptation is not modified so severely as a man of spirit living in the world who would prescribe himself such rules? Not merely have I prescribed return Belfill. I have already put them in practice and far from finding my penance I never before found happiness. I have now adopted therefore the very plan of life I should have elected if rich. My pleasure therefore is become my business and my business my pleasure. And is this plan, cried Mountain, nothing more than turning knight-errant to booksellers? It is a knight-errantry, cried Belfill laughing, which, however, ludicrous it may seem to you requires more soul and more brains than any other. Our giants may indeed be only windmills, but they must be attacked with as much spirit and conquered with as much bravery as any fort or any town in the time of war to be demolished. And though the siege I must confess may be of less national utility, the assailants of the quill have their honor as much at heart as the salons of the swan. I suppose, then, said Mr. Moncton archly, if a man wants a biting lampoon or an handsome panigyric, some newspaper scandal or a sonnet for a lady. No, no, interrupted Belfill eagerly. If you imagine me a hireling scribbler, for the purposes of deformation or of flattery, you as little know my situation as my character. My subjects shall be my own, and my satire shall be general. I would as much disdain to be personal with an anonymous pen as to attack an unarmed man in the dark with a dagger I had kept concealed. A reply of rallying in credulity was rising to the lips of Mr. Moncton when reading in the looks of Cecilia an entire approbation of this sentiment he checked his desire of ridicule and exclaimed, spoken like a man of honour and one whose words may profit the world. From my earliest youth to the present are continued Belfill. Literature has been a favourite object of my pursuit, my recreation in leisure and my hope in employment. My propensity to it indeed has been so ungovernable that I may properly call it the source of my several miscarriages throughout life. It was the bar to my preferment for it gave me a distaste to other studies. It was the cause of my unsteadiness in all my undertakings because to all I preferred it. It has sunk me to distress. It has involved me in difficulties. It has brought me to the brink of ruin by making me neglect the means of living. Yet never, till now, did I discern it might itself be my support. I'm heartily glad, sir, said Cecilia. Your various enterprises and struggles have at length ended in a project which promises you so much satisfaction. But you will surely suffer your sister and your mother to partake of it for who is there that your prosperity will make so happy. You do them infinite honour, madame, by taking any interest in their affairs. But to own to you the truth what to me appears prosperity will to them wear another aspect. They have looked forward to my elevation with expectations the most improbable and thought everything within my grasp with a simplicity incredible. But though their hopes were absurd I'm pained by their disappointment and I have not courage to meet the tears which I'm sure will not be spared when they see me. It is from tenderness then, said Cecilia, half smiling, that you are cruel and from affection to your friends that you make them believe you have forgotten them. There was a delicacy in this reproach exactly suited to work upon Belfield who feeling it with quickness started up and cried. I believe I'm wrong. I will go to them this moment. Cecilia felt eager to second the generous impulse. But Mr. Moncton, laughing at his impetuousity, insisted he should first finish his breakfast. Your friends, said Cecilia, can have no modification so hard to bear as your voluntary absence. And if they see but that you are happy they will soon be reconciled to whatever situation you may choose. Happy, repeated he with animation. Oh, I'm in paradise. I've come from a region in the first rude state of nature to civilization and refinement. The life I led at the cottage was the life of a savage no intercourse with society no consolation from books my mind locked up every source dried of intellectual delight and no enjoyment in my power but from sleep and from food very often existence which thus levelled me with a brute I grew ashamed of the approximation and listening to the remonstrance of my understanding I gave up the precipitate plan to pursue one more consonant to reason I came to town hired a room and sent for pen ink and paper what I have written at ripples but the bookseller has not rejected them I was settled therefore in a moment and comparing my new occupation with that I had just quitted I seemed exalted on the sudden from a mere creature of instinct to a rational and intelligent being but when first I opened a book after so long an abstinence from all mental nourishment Oh, it was rapture no half famished beggar regaled suddenly with food ever seized on his repast with more hungry evidently let fortune turn which way it will cried mountain you may defy all its malice while possessed of a spirit of enjoyment which nothing can subdue but were you not, sir, said Cecilia as great an enthusiast the other day for your cottage and for labour I was, madam but there my philosophy was erroneous in my order to fly from meanness and from dependence I thought in labour and retirement I should find freedom and happiness but I forgot that my body was not seasoned for such work and considered not that a mind which had once been opened by knowledge could ill endure the contraction of dark and perpetual ignorance the approach, however, of winter brought me acquainted with my mistake it grew cold it grew bleak little guarded against the inculmency of the I felt its severity in every limb and missed a thousand indulgencies which in possession I had never valued to rise at the break of day chill freezing and comfortless no sun abroad no fire at home to go out in all weather to work that work rough coarse and laborious unused to such hardships I found I could not bear them and, however unwillingly, was compelled to relinquish the attempt breakfast now being over he again arose to take leave you're going then, sir, said Cecilia immediately to your friends no, madam, answered he hesitating not just this moment tomorrow morning, perhaps but it is now late and I have business for the rest of the day ah, Mr. Moncton cried Cecilia what mischief have you done by occasioning this delay this goodness, madam, said Belfield my sister can never sufficiently acknowledge but I will own that though just now in a warm moment I felt eager to present myself to her and my mother I rather wish now I'm cooler to be saved the pain of telling them in person my situation I mean therefore first to write to them you will not fail then to see them tomorrow? certainly, I think not nay, but certainly you must not for I shall call upon them today and assure them they may expect you can I soften your task of writing by giving them any message from you ah, madam, have a care, cried he this condescension to a poor order may be more dangerous than you have any suspicion and before you have power to help yourself you may see your name prefixed to the dedication of some Trumpery pamphlet I will run, cried she, all risks remember therefore you will be responsible for the performance of my promise I will be sure and sure he not to forget what reflects so much honour upon myself Cecilia was satisfied by this ascent and he then went away a strange flighty character, cried Mr. Mountain yet of uncommon capacity and full of genius were he less imaginative, wild and eccentric he has abilities for any station and might fix and distinguish himself almost wherever he pleased I knew not, said Cecilia the full worth of steadiness and prudence till I knew this young man for he has everything else talents the most striking a love of virtue the most elevated and manners the most pleasing yet wanting steadiness and prudence he can neither act with consistency nor prosper with continuance his well enough said Lady Margaret who had heard the whole argument in sullen tessiturnity he is well enough I say and there comes no good from young women's being so difficult Cecilia offended by a speech which implied a rude desire to dispose of her went upstairs to her own room and Mr. Mountain always enraged when young men and Cecilia were alluded to in the same sentence retired to his library she then ordered a chair and went to Portland street to fulfill what she had offered to Belfield and to revive his mother and sister by the pleasure of the promised interview she found them together and her intelligence being of equal consequence to both she did not now repine at the presence of Mrs. Belfield she made a communication with the most cautious attention to their characters softening the ill she had to relate with respect to Belfield's present way of living by endeavoring to awaken affection and joy from the prospect of the approaching meeting she counseled them as much as possible to restrain their chagrin at his misfortunes which he would but construe into reproach of his ill management and she represented that when once he was restored to his family he might almost imperceptibly be led into some less wild and more profitable scheme of business when she had told all she thought proper to relate kindly in dispersing her account with the best advice and best comfort she could suggest she made an end of her visit for the affliction of Mrs. Belfield upon hearing the actual situation of her son was so clamorous and unappeasable that little wandering at Belfield's want of courage to encounter it and having no opportunity in such a storm to console the soft Henrietta whose tears float abundantly that her brother should thus be fallen she only promised before she left town to see her again and beseeching Mrs. Belfield to moderate her concern was glad to leave the house where her presence had no power to quiet the distress she passed the rest of the day and sat reflections upon the meeting she was herself to have the next morning with Mr. Del Weil she wished ardently to know whether his son was gone abroad and whether Mrs. Del Weil was recovered whose health in her own letter was mentioned in terms the most melancholy yet neither of these inquiries could she even think of making since reasonably without them apprehensive of some reproach End of Chapter 3 This is a LibriVox Recording All LibriVox Recordings are in the public domain For more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org Recorded by Walle Cecilia Memorials of Inheres by Francis Burney Volume 9 Chapter 4 A Wrangling Part 1 Mr. Moncton the next day as soon as breakfast was over went out to avoid showing even to Cecilia the anxiety he felt concerning the regulation of her fortune and arrangement of her affairs He strongly however advised her not to mention her large debt which though contracted in the innocence of the purest benevolence would incur nothing but reproof and disapprovation from all who only heard of it when they heard of its inutility At 11 o'clock though an hour before the time appointed while Cecilia was sitting in Lady Margaret's dressing room with sad civility and an aching head she was summoned to Mr. Briggs in the parlor He immediately began reproaching her with having eloped with him in the summer and with the various expenses she had caused him from useless purchases and spoiled provisions He then complained of Mr. Delweiler whom he charged with defrauding him of his dues but observing in the midst of his railing her dejection of countenance he suddenly woke off and looking at her with some concern said What's the matter Ducky? Ain't well? Look as if you could not help it Oh yes cried Cecilia I thank you Sam very well What do you look so blank for then? said he Bae what are you fretting for? Crest in love? Lost your sweet heart? No no no cried she with quickness Never mind my chick, never mind, said he pinching her cheek with resumed good humour more to be had if one won't snap another well put me in a passion by going off from me with that old grandee or would have got one long ago Hate that old Don used me very ill wish I could round him thinks more of a fusty old parchment than the price of stocks fit for nothing but to be stuck upon an old monument for a death's head he then told her that her accounts were all made out and he was ready at any time to produce them he approved much of her finishing wholly with the old Don who had been a mere cipher in the executorship but he advised her not to think of taking her money into her own hands as he was willing to keep the charge of it himself till she was married Cecilia thanking him for the offer said she meant now to make her acknowledgements for all the trouble he had already taken but by no means purposed to give him any more he debated the matter with her warmly told her she had no chance to save herself from naves and cheats but by trusting to nobody but himself and informing her what interest he had already made of her money inquired how she would set about getting more Cecilia, though prejudiced against him by Mr. Moncton, knew not how to combat his arguments yet conscious that scarce any part of the money to which he alluded was in fact her own she could not yield to them he was however so stubborn and so difficult to deal with that she at length let him talk without troubling herself to answer and privately determined to beg Mr. Moncton would fight her matter she was not therefore displeased by his interruption though very much surprised by the sight of his person when in the midst of Mr. Briggs oratory Mr. Hobson entered the parlour I asked pardon ma'am, cried he, if I intrude but I made free to call upon the count of two ladies that are acquaintances of yours that are quite as one may say at their wit's end what's the matter with them sir? why ma'am no great matter but mothers are soon frightened and when once they are upon the fret one may as well talk to the moods they know no more of reasoning and arguing than they do of a sharp ledger however my maxim is this everybody in their way one has no more right to expect courageousness from a lady in them cases than one has from a child in arms for what I say is they have not the proper use of their heads which makes it very excusable but what has occasioned any alarm nothing I hope is the matter with Ms. Bellfield no ma'am thank God the young lady enjoys her health well but she is taking on just in the same way as her mama as what can be more natural example ma'am is apt to be catching and one lady's crying makes another think she must do the same for a little thing serves for a lady's tears being they can cry at any time but a man is quite of another nature let him have but a good consign and be clear of the world and I'll engage he'll not wash his face without soap that's what I say well well cried mr. Briggs do it myself never use soap nothing but waste take a little sand does as well let every man have his own proposal answered Hobson for my part take every morning a large bowl of water and saws my whole head in it and then when I have rubbed it dry on goes my wig and I'm quite fresh and agreeable and then I take a walk in Tottenham Court Road as far as the Tabernacle or thereabouts and snuff in a little fresh country air and then I come back with a good wholesome appetite and in a fine breathing heat asking the young ladies pardon and I enjoy my pot of fresh tea and my round of hot toast and butter with as good a relish as if I was a prince pot of fresh tea cried Briggs bring a man to ruin toast and butter never suffer it in my house breakfast and water grow sooner done fills one up in a second give it my servants can't eat much of it pop them there nodding significantly water grew exclaimed mr. Hobson why I could not get it down if I might have the world for it it would make me quite sick asking the young ladies pardon by reason I should always think I was preparing for the smallpox my notion is quite of another nature the first thing I do is to have a good fire for what I say is this if a man is cold in his fingers it's odds if ever he gets warm in his purse haha warm you take me sir I mean a pun though I ought to ask pardon for I suppose the young lady don't know what I'm saying I should indeed be better pleased sir said Cecilia to hear what you have to say about miss belfield why ma'am the thing is this we have been expecting the young squire as I call him all the morning and he has never come so Mrs belfield not knowing where to send after him was of opinion he might be here knowing your kindness to him and that you make the inquiry at the wrong place sir said Cecilia much provoked by the implication it conveyed if mr. belfield is in this house you must seek him with mr. mountain you take no offense I hope ma'am at my just asking of the question for mrs. belfield crying and being in their dilemma I thought I could do no less than oblige her by coming to see if the young gentleman was here what's this what's this cried mr. Briggs eagerly who are you talking of hey who do you mean is this a sweetheart hey duck no no sir cried Cecilia no tricks one bit who is it Vino tell me I say I'll tell sir right mr. Hobson it's a very handsome young gentleman with as fine a person and as gentle a way of behavior and with all as pretty a manner of dressing himself and that as any lady need desire he has no great head for business as I'm told but the ladies don't stand much upon that topic being they know nothing of it themselves has got the ready cried mr. Briggs impatiently can cast an account that's the point can come down handsomlier why as to that sir I'm not bound to speak to a gentleman's private affairs what's my own is my own and what is another person's is another person's that's my way of arguing and that's what I call talking to the purpose dare say he's a rogue don't have him check that a wager ain't worth two shillings and that will go for powder and pomatum hit a place to a pit commonly a numbskull love a good one Jerome why this is talking quite wide of the mark said mr. Hobson to suppose a young lady of fortunes would marry a man with a Bob Jerome what I say is let everybody follow their nature that's the way to be comfortable and then if they pay everyone his own who's a right to call them to account whether they wear a Bob Jerome or a pigtail down to the calves of their legs hi I cried bricks nearingly or whether they stuffed their gullets with hot rounds of toast and butter and what if they do sir returned Hobson a little angrily when a man's got above the world where's the harm of living a little gentile as to a round of toast and butter and a few oysters fresh opened by the of a damper for dinner no man need be ashamed of them provided he pays as he goes and as to living upon what a girl and scrubbing ones flesh with sand one might as well be a galley slave at once you don't understand life sir I see that do do cried bricks speaking through his shut teeth you're out there oysters come to ruin tell you bring you to jail to jail sir exclaimed Hobson this is talking quite ungentile let every man be civil that's what I say for that's the way to make everything agreeable but as to telling a man he'll go to jail and that it's that amount to affronting him a rap at the street door gave now a new relief to Cecilia who began to grow very apprehensive lest the delight of spending money does only contested with that of hoarding it should give rise to a quarrel which between two such sturdy champions for their own opinions might lead to a conclusion rather more rough and violent than she desired to witness but when the parlor door opened instead of mr del vile whom she now fully expected mr albany made his entrance this was rather distressing as her real business with her guardians made it proper her conference with them should be undisturbed and albany was not a man with whom a hint that she was engaged could be risked but she had made no preparation to guard against interruption as her little acquaintance in london had prevented her expecting any visitors he advanced with a solemn air to Cecilia and looking as if hardly determined whether to speak with several to your gentleness said once more I come to prove thy sincerity now will thou go with me where sorrow calls thee sorrow i charity can mitigate i'm very much concerned she answered but indeed at present it is utterly impossible again criety with a look at one's turn and disappointed again thou fillest me what wanton trifling why should's thou thus late a one-out mind only to make it feel its lingering credulity all right teaching me to think I had found an angel so unkindly undecieved me indeed said Cecilia much affected by this reproach if you knew how heavy a loss I had personally suffered I do know it criety and I grieved for thee when I heard it thou hast lost a faithful old friend a loss which with every setting sun thou mayest mown for the rising sun will never repair it but was that a reason for shunning the duties of humanity was the sight of death a motive for neglecting the claims of benevolence ought it not rather to have hastened your fulfilling them and should not your own suffering experience of the brevity of life have taught you the vanity of all things but preparing for its end perhaps so but my grief at that time made me think only of myself and of what else does thou think now most probably of the same person still said she half smiling but yet believe me I have real business to transact frivolous unmeaning I've already excuses what business is so important as the relief of a fellow creature I shall not I hope there answered she with alacrity be backward but at least for this morning I must beg to make you my almoner she then took out her purse Mr. Brakes and Mr. Hobson whose quarrel had been suspended by the appearance of a third person and who had stood during this short dialogue in silent amazement having first lost their anger in their mutual consternation now lost their consternation in their mutual displeasure Mr. Hobson felt offended to hear business spoken of slightly and Mr. Brakes felt enraged at the sight of Cecilia's ready purse neither of them however knew which way to interfere the stem gravity of Albany joined to a language too lofty for their comprehension intimidating them both they took however the relief of communing with one another and Mr. Hobson said in a whisper this you must know is I'm told a very particular old gentleman quite what I call a genius he comes often to my house to see my lord germus henny belfield though I never happen to light upon him myself except once in the passage but what I hear of him is this he makes a practice as one may say of going about into people's houses to do nothing but find fault shan get into mine return bricks promise him that don't have like him be bound he's an old sharper Cecilia meantime inquired what he desired to have half a guinea he answered will that do for those who have nothing said he it's much hereafter you may assist them again go but and see the distresses and you will wish to give them everything Mr. Brakes now when actually between her fingers he saw the half guinea could contain no longer he twitched the sleeve of her gown and pinching her arm with a look of painful eagerness said in a whisper don't give it don't let him have it chose him chose him nothing but an old bite pardon me sir said Cecilia in a low voice his character is very well known to me and then disengaging her arm from him she presented her little offering at this site Mr. Brakes was almost outrageous and losing in his wrath all fear of the stranger he burst forth with fury into the following outcries be ruined see it plainly be fleeced be stripped be robbed won't have a gown to your back won't have a shoe to your foot won't have a rag in the world be a beggar in the street come to the parish rot in a jail half a guinea at a time enough to break the great muggle inhuman spirit of selfish parsimony exclaimed albany propinus now at this alone given from thousands to those who have worse than nothing who pay today in hunger for bread the borrowed yesterday from pity who to save themselves from the deadly pangs of formine solicit but what the rich know not when they possess and miss not when they give a nun cried bricks recovering his temper from the perplexity of his understanding at a discourse to which his ears were wholly unaccustomed what do you say if to thyself distress may cry in vain continued albany if thy own heart resists the supply and sprayer callous to entreaty and hardened in the world suffer at least a creature yet untainted who melts at sorrow and who goes with charity to pay from her vast wealth a generous tax of thankfulness that fate has not reversed her doom and those whom she relieves relieve her not a nun was again all the wondering mr bricks could say pray ma'am said mr hopson to Cecilia if it's no offense was the gentleman ever a player i fancy not indeed i asked pardon then ma'am i mean ma'am but my notion was the gentleman might be speaking something by heart is it but on the stage humanity exists cried albany indignantly all the other hasten then ye monopolizers of plenty ye selfish unfeeling and grosses of wealth which ye dissipate without enjoying and of abundance which ye waste while you refuse to distribute thither thither haste if their humanity exists as to ungrossing said mr hopson happy to hear at last a word with which he was familiar it is what i never proved myself my maxim is this if a man makes a fair penny without any underhand dealings why he has as much a title to enjoy his pleasure as the chief justice or the lord chancellor and its odds but he's as happy as a greater man though what i hold to be best of all is a clear consigns with a neat income of two or three thousand a year that's my notion and i don't think it's a bad one weak policy of short-sighted ignorance cried albany to wish for what if used brings care and if neglected remorse have you not now beyond what nature craves why then still sigh for more why cried mr briggs who by dint of deep attention began now better to comprehend him why to buy him to be sure ever hear of stocks eh know anything of money still to make more and more cried albany and therefore to spend in wise and idleness or hold in cheerless misery not to give sucker to the wretched not to support the falling all is for self however little wanted all goes to added stores or added luxury no fellow creature served nor even one beggar relieved glad of it cried breaks glad of it would not have them relieved don't like them hate a beggar ought to be all whipped live upon sponging why as to a beggar i must need say cried mr. Hobson and by no means an approver of that mode of proceeding being i take them all for cheats for what i say is this what a man earns he earns and it's no man's business to inquire what he spends for a free born Englishman is his own master by the nature of the law and as to his being a subject why a duke is no more nor a judge nor the law high chancellor and the like of those which make it that amount to nothing being he is answerable to nobody by the right of Magna Carta except in cases of treason felony and that but as to a beggar it's quite another thing he comes and asks me for money but what has he to shoe for it what does he bring main exchange why a long story that he ain't worth a penny what's that to me nothing at all that every man have his own that's my way of arguing ungentle mortals cried albany in wealth exalting even in in humanity thank you these wretched outcasts have less sensibility than yourselves thank you in cold and hunger they lose those feelings which even envelopes prosperity from time to time disturb you you say they are all cheats it's but the niggard can't have amorous to lure their remorse from objeurecy thank you the naked wanderer begs from choice give him your wealth and try give him a whip cried bricks shan't have a sauce send him to bread well nothing but a proper hate them hate them all full of tricks break their own legs put out their arms cut off their fingers snap their own ankles all for what to get at the chink to trousers of cash ought to be well-flucked have them all sent to the themes worse than the convicts poor subterfuge of callous cruelty you cheat yourselves to shun the fraud of others and yet how better do you use the wealth so guarded what nobler purpose can it answer to you than even a chance to snatch some wretch from sinking pink less how much you save and more for what and then consider how thy full coffers may hereafter make reparation for the empty catalog of thy virtues anon cried mr. Briggs again lost in perplexity in wonder oh yet continued albany turning towards cecilia preach not hear the hardness which a practice rather amen yourselves than corrupt her and give fit liberality what ye ought to receive at gratitude this is not my doctrine cried hobson i'm not a near man neither but as to giving at that rate it's quite out of character i have as good a right to my own savings as to my own getting's and what i say is this whole gift to me let me see that and it's quite another thing and begin who will i'll be bound to go on with him pound for pound or pens for pens but as to giving to them beggars it's what i don't approve i paid a poor's rate and that's what i call charity enough for any man but for the matter of living well and spending one's money handsomely and having one's comforts about one why it's a thing of another nature and i can say this for myself and that is i never rushed myself anything in my life i always made myself agreeable and lived on the best that's my way bad way to cry breaks never get on with it never see beyond your nose won't be worth a plum while your head wax then taking cecilia part haki my duck he added pointing to albany who is that mr bounds a what is he i have known him but a short time sir but i think of him very highly is he a good man that's the point is he a good man indeed he appears to me uncommonly benevolent and charitable but that ain't the thing is he one that's the point is he one if you mean passionate sense cecilia i believe the energy of his manner is merely to enforce what he says don't take me don't take me cry him patiently can come down with the ready that's the matter can shrink the little gold boys sir why i rather fear not by his appearance but i know nothing of his affairs what does come for come a coating must you only know you what for then only a sponging no indeed he seems to have no wish but to assist in plate for this all fudge think he ain't touched i i nothing but a trick only to get at the chink see his ass poor as a rat talks of nothing but giving money a bad sign if he had got any would not do it wanted to make us come down warrant thought to bomb us all out there ain't so soon gold end of chapter four part one volume nine chapter four part two of cecilia this is a libravox recording all libravox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit libravox.org recorded by berenie cecilia memoirs of an eras by francis bernie volume nine chapter four a wrangling part two a knock at the street door gave now a new interruption and mr. del vile at length appeared cecilia whom his sight could not fail to disconcert felt doubly distressed by the unnecessary presence of albany and hobson she regretted the absence of mr. monkton who could easily have taken them away for though without scruples she could herself have acquainted mr. hobson she had business she dreaded offending albany whose esteem she was ambitious of obtaining mr. del vile entered the room with an air stately and erect he took off his hat but deigned not to make the smallest inclination of his head nor offered any excuse to mr. briggs for being past the hour of his appointment but having advanced a few paces without looking either to the right or left said as i have never acted my coming may not perhaps be essential but as my name is in the dean's will and i have once or twice met the other executors mentioned in it i think it a duty i owe to my own airs to prevent any possible future inquiry or trouble to them this speech was directly addressed to no one though meant to be attended to by everyone and seemed proudly uttered as a mere apology to himself for not having declined the meeting cecilia though she recovered from her confusion by the help of her aversion to this self-sufficiency made not any answer albany retired to a corner of the room mr. hobson began to believe it was time for him to depart and mr. briggs thinking only of the quarrel in which he had separated with mr. del vile in the summer stood swelling with venom which he longed for an opportunity to spit out mr. del vile who regarded the silence as the effect of his all inspiring presence became rather more complacent but casting his eyes round the room and perceiving the two strangers he was visibly surprised and looking at cecilia for some explanation seemed to stand suspended from the purpose of his visit till he heard one cecilia earnest to have the business concluded turned to mr. briggs and said sir here is pen and ink are you to write or am i or what is to be done no who knows said he with a sneer give it to the all-in-all turn don't come before his grace the right honorable mr. vompus before whom sir said mr. del vile redding before my lord don pedigree answered briggs with a spiteful grin know him may ever hear of such a person mr. del vile colored still deeper but turning contemptuously from him disdained making any reply mr. briggs who now regarded him as a defeated man said exultingly to mr. hobson what do stand here for hey follow your mera bones don't see squire high and mighty as to falling on my mera bones answered mr. hobson it's what i shall do to no man except he was the king himself for the like of that and going to make me chancellor of the exchequer or commissioner of excise not that i mean the gentleman any offense but a man's a man and for one man to worship another is quite out of law must must cried briggs tell all his old grandad's else keeps him in a roll locks him in a closet says his prayers to him can't live without him like some better than cash wish adam here pop them all in the sink if your intention sir cried mr. del vile fiercely is only to insult me i am prepared for what measures i shall take i declined seeing you in my own house that i might not be under the same restraint as when it was my unfortunate lot to meet you last who cares cried briggs with an air of defiance what can do a poke me into a family vault bind me atop of an old monument tie me to a stinking carcass make a corpse of me and call it one of your famous cousins for heaven's sake mr. briggs interrupted cecilia who saw that mr. del vile trembling with passion scarce refrained lifting up his stick be appeased and let us finish our business albany now hearing in cecilia's voice the alarm with which she was seized came forward and exclaimed whence the sun meaning dissension to what purpose this irritating abuse oh vane and foolish live ye so happily last ye so long that time and peace may thus be trifled with there there cried briggs holding up his finger at mr. del vile have it now got old mr. bounce upon you give you enough of it promise you that restrain continued albany this idle wrath and if you have ardent passions employ them to nobler uses let them stimulate acts of virtue let them animate deeds of beneficence oh waste not spirits that may urge you to good lead you to honor warm you to charity in poor and angry words in unfriendly unmanly debate mr. del vile whom from the approach of albany had given him his whole attention was struck with astonishment at this address and almost petrified with wonder at his language and exhortations why I must own said mr. hobson as to this matter I am much of the same mind myself for quarrelling's a thing I don't uphold being it advances one no way for what I say is this if a man gets the better he's only where he was before and if he gets worsted why it's odds but the laughs against him so if I may make bold to give my verdict I would have one of these gentlemen take the other by the hand and so put an end about words that's my maxim and that's what I call being agreeable mr. del vile at the words one of these gentlemen take the other by the hand looked scornfully upon mr. hobson with a frown that expressed his highest indignation at being thus familiarly coupled with mr. Briggs and then turning from him to Cecilia hotly said are these two persons pointing towards albany and hobson waiting here to be witnesses to any transaction no sir no cried hobson I don't mean to intrude I am going directly so you can give me no insight mum addressing Cecilia as to where I might light upon mr. belfield me no cried she much provoked by observing that mr. del vile suddenly looked at her well mum well I mean no harm only I hold it that the right way to hear of a young gentleman is to ask for him of a young lady that's my maxim come sir to mr. Briggs you and I had liked to have fallen out but what I say is this let no man bear malice that's my way so I hope we part without ill blood I said mr. Briggs giving him a nod well then added hobson I hope the good will may go round and that not only you and I but these two good old gentlemen will also lend a hand mr. del vile was now at a loss which way to turn for very rage but after looking at everyone with a face flaming with ire he said to Cecilia if you have collected together these persons for the purpose of affronting me I must beg you to remember I am not one to be affronted with impunity Cecilia half frightened was beginning an answer that disclaimed any such intention when albany with the most indignant energy called out oh pride of heart with littleness of soul check this vile arrogance too vain for man and spare to others some part of that lenity thou nourishest for thyself or justly bestow on thyself that contempt thou nourishest for others and with these words he sternly left the house the thunder struck mr. del vile began now to fancy that all the demons of torment were designedly let loose upon him and his surprise and resentment operated so powerfully that it was only in broken sentences he could express either very extraordinary a new method of conduct liberties to which I am not much used impertinences I shall not hastily forget treatment that would scarce be pardonable to a person wholly unknown why indeed sir said Hobson I can't but say it was rather a cut up but the old gentleman is what one may call a genius which makes it a little excusable for he does things all his own way and I am told it's the same thing who he speaks to so he can but find fault and that sir interrupted the still more highly offended mr. del vile what you may be told is extremely immaterial to me and I must take the liberty to hint at you a conversation of this easy kind is not what I am much in practice in hearing sir I asked pardon said Hobson I meant nothing but what was agreeable however I have done and I wish you good day you're humble servant mum and I hope sir to mr. Briggs you won't begin bad words again no no said Briggs ready to make up all at end only don't much like Spain that's all winking significantly nor aren't over fond of a skeleton mr. Hobson now retired and mr. del vile and mr. Briggs being both wearied and both in haste to have done settled in about five minutes all for which they met after passing more than an hour in agreeing what that was mr. Briggs then saying he had an engagement upon business declined settling his own accounts till another time but promised to see Cecilia again soon and added be sure take care of that old mr. bounce cracked in the noddle see that with half an eye better not trust him break out some day do you a mischief he then went away but while the parlor door was still open to the no little surprise of Cecilia the servant announced mr. belfield he hardly entered the room and his countenance spoke haste and eagerness I have this moment madam he said been informed a complaint has been lodged against me here and I could not rest till I had the honor of assuring you that though I have been rather deletory I have not neglected my appointment nor has the condescension of your interference been thrown away he then bowed shut the door and ran off Cecilia though happy to understand by this speech that he was actually restored to his family was sorry at these repeated intrusions in the presence of mr. del vile who was now the only one that remained she expected every instant that he would ring for his chair which he kept in waiting but after a pause of some continuance to her equal surprise and disturbance he made the following speech as it is probable I am now for the last time alone with you mom and as it is certain we shall meet no more upon business I cannot injustice to my own character and to the respect I retain for the memory of the dean your uncle take a final leave of the office with which he was pleased to invest me without first fulfilling my own ideas of the duty it requires from me by giving you some counsel relating to your future establishment this was not a preface much to enliven Cecilia it prepared her for such speeches as she was least willing to hear and gave to her the mixed and painful sensation of spirits depressed with pride alarmed my numerous engagements he continued and the approbation of my time already settled to their various claims must make me brief in what I have to represent and somewhat perhaps abrupt in coming to the purpose but that you will excuse Cecilia disdain to humor this arrogance by any compliments or concessions she was silent therefore and when they were both seated he went on you are now at a time of life when it is natural for young women to wish for some connection and the largeness of your fortune will remove from you such difficulties as prove bars to the pretensions in this expensive age of those who possess not such advantages it would have been some pleasure to me while I yet considered you as my ward to have seen you properly disposed of but as that time is passed I can only give you some general advice which you may follow or neglect as you think fit by giving it I shall satisfy myself for the rest I am not responsible he paused but Cecilia felt less and less inclination to make use of the opportunity by speaking in her turn yet though as I just now hinted young women of large fortunes may have little trouble in finding themselves establishments they ought not therefore to trifle when proper ones are in their power nor suppose themselves equal to any they may chance to desire Cecilia colored high at this pointed reprehension but feeling her disgust every moment increase determined to sustain herself with dignity and at least not suffer him to perceive the triumph of his ostentation and rudeness the proposals he continued of the Earl of Ernoff had always my approbation it was certainly an ill-judged thing to neglect such an opportunity of being honorably settled the clause of the name was to him immaterial since his own name half a century ago was unheard of and since he is himself only known by his title he is still however I have authority to acquaint you perfectly well disposed to renew his application to you I am sorry sir said Cecilia coldly to hear it you have perhaps some better offer in view no sir cried she with spirit not even in desire am I then to infer that some inferior offer has more chance of your approbation there is no reason sir to infer anything I am content with my actual situation and have at present neither prospect nor intention of changing it I perceive but without surprise your unwillingness to discuss the subject nor do I mean to press it I shall merely offer to your consideration one caution and then relieve you from my presence young women of ample fortunes who are early independent are sometimes apt to presume they may do everything with impunity but they are mistaken they are as liable to censure as those who are wholly unprovided for I hope sir said Cecilia staring this at least is a caution rather drawn from my situation than my behavior I mean not mom narrowly to go into or investigate the subject what I have said you may make your own use of I have only to observe further that when young women at your time of life are at all negligent of so nicer thing as reputation they commonly live to repent it he then arose to go but Cecilia not more offended than amazed said I must beg sir you will explain yourself certainly this matter he answered must be immaterial to me yet as I have once been your guardian by the nomination of the dean your uncle I cannot forbear making an effort towards preventing any indiscretion and frequent visits to a young man good god sir interrupted Cecilia what is it you mean it can certainly as I said before be nothing to me though I should be glad to see you in better hands but I cannot suppose you have been led to take such steps without some serious plan and I would advise you without loss of time to think better of what you are about should I think sir to eternity cried Cecilia I could never conjecture what you mean you may not choose said he proudly to understand me but I have done if it had been in my power to have interfered in your service with my lord derford not withstanding my reluctance to being involved in any fresh employment I should have made a point of not refusing it but this young man is nobody a very imprudent connection what young man sir nay I know nothing of him it is by no means likely I should but as I had already been informed of your attention to him the corroborating incidents of my servants following you to his house his friends seeking him at yours and his own waiting upon you this morning were not well calculated to make me withdraw my credence to it is it then Mr. Bellfield sir concerning whom you draw these inferences from circumstances the most accidental and unmeaning it is by no means my practice cried he hotly and with evident marks of high displeasure at the speech to believe anything lightly or without even questionable authority what once therefore I have credited I do not often find erroneous mistake not however what I have said into supposing I have any objection to your marrying on the contrary it had been for the honor of my family had you been married a year ago I should not then have suffered the degradation of seeing a son of the first expectations in the kingdom upon the point of renouncing his birth nor a woman of the first distinction ruined in her health and broken forever in her constitution the emotions of Cecilia at this speech were too powerful for concealment her color varied now reddening with indignation now turning pale with apprehension she arose she trembled and sat down she arose again but not knowing what to say or what to do again sat down Mr. Del Vile then making a stiff bow wished her good morning do not go sir cried she in faltering accents let me at least convince you of the mistake with regard to Mr. Belfield my mistakes mum said he with a contemptuous smile are perhaps not easily convicted and I may possibly labor under others that would give you no less trouble it may therefore be better to avoid any further disquisition no not better answered she again recovering her courage from this fresh provocation I fear no disquisition on the contrary it is my interest to solicit one this intrepidity in a young woman said he ironically is certainly very commendable and doubtless as you are your own mistress you're having run out great part of your fortune is nothing beyond what you have a right to do me cried Cecilia astonished run out great part of my fortune perhaps that is another mistake I have not often been so unfortunate and you are not then in debt in debt sir nay I have no intention to inquire into your affairs good morning to you mum I beg I entreat sir that you will stop make me at least understand what you mean whether you deign to hear my justification or not oh I am mistaken it seems misinformed deceived and you have neither spent more than you have received nor taken up money of Jews your minority has been clear of debts and your fortune now you are of age will be free from encumbrances Cecilia who now began to understand him eagerly answered do you mean sir the money which I took up last spring oh no by no means I conceive the whole to be a mistake and he went to the door hear me but a moment sir cried she hastily following him since you know of that transaction do not refuse to listen to its occasion I took up the money for mr. Harrell it was all and solely for him for mr. Harrell was it said he with an air of supercilious incredulity that was rather an unlucky step your servant mum and he opened the door you will not hear me then you will not credit me cried she in the cruelest agitation some other time mum at present my avocations are too numerous to permit me and again stiffly bowing he called to a servants who were waiting in the hall and put himself into his chair end of chapter four recorded by berenie