 Hello, everybody. Welcome to part 5a of the Magdalen series. Yes, you heard that correct. This is part 5a. Usually what I do is I divide these sections off in the book where we end with one of the powers, one of the seven powers that Mary Magdalen speaks about in her gospel. We ended up last week on the third power of ignorance and the fourth power is called craving for death, but there's quite a huge section in between the third and the fourth power. That is why I'm going to divide this part 5 into A and B. Otherwise, we might all be sitting here for three hours trying to get through this section, even though this is probably one of my most favorite series to record as I am learning this with you and reading this for the first time with you on camera. I know that we all have things to do in our lives. So again, that's why I am dividing this into two sections. I also want to give you guys a little bit of a heads up since this series has been so successful. I have been talking with both Catherine and Shanti from Aquarius Rising Africa about going over some other books. With Catherine, I'll keep you guys posted on what we decide to do moving forward. But with Shanti, we spoke about this morning doing this book together with you guys called the Aquarian Gospel of Jesus the Christ, the philosophic and practical basis of the religion of the Aquarian Age of the world and of the Church Universal. And so I ordered this. Mine should be coming in tomorrow. I already ordered this book. I'm not sure when we're going to actually start the series. But if you guys want to join in with us as we review this book and discuss it together, then I would go ahead and get this book. Yes, I am on Amazon right now. I know that some people aren't going to like that, but it is what it is. We are still living in the matrix in our 3D lives. And so I did order this from Amazon. But from what I understand, there is a possibility that Amazon is now run by good guys. So fingers crossed, that's what's going on. All right. So we're going to start today with the chapter called the Gospel of Mary Magdalene. Then Mary stood up and greeted them. She tenderly kissed them all and said, brothers and sisters, do not weep, do not be distressed, nor be in doubt, for his grace will be with you sheltering you. Rather, we should praise his greatness, for he has united us and made us true human beings. The Gospel of Mary chapter 5 verses 4 through 8. I read the scholar and priest Jean-Yves Lalupe's translation of the Gospel of Mary's Gospel before Dr. Karen King's translation the summer before entering seminary. I remember seeing it from across the bookstore. I sort of hurtled towards it as if no longer in control of my legs, as if the Gospel of Mary was magnetized and there was no resisting its traction. I probably looked possessed. The moment I had it in my hands, I stared at the image on its cover. It was the painting with Mary Magdalene being lifted up by four angels and then I just sank down and sat on the ground right there and started reading it. I didn't move until I had read the entire book. It's so funny as we moved into more of a tech-savvy age. I think I was in my 20s, maybe early 30s, when the kindles came around before the iPads were a thing. I remember so many people were purchasing books on kindle and reading it on their kindles and I've just never done that. I agree with her here. I love bookstores. I love the smell of bookstores. I've always been a big reader, always, always, always. Before everything went topsy-turvy in our world, that was one of my favorite things to do was to go into a bookstore and just sit down and scour through books. Of course, I would always end up buying books, but just the smell of the pages. Even just reading this, smelling the page of the books, I have such a love affair with actual books, actual written word. I love that she did that because I definitely am not someone that would ever order anything off of a kindle. I too also like to make notes in books, especially books like this. Fun reads, not so much at all. But these books, these types of books, I definitely do always take notes in them and go back and review them. In fact, one of my favorite books as far as like a philosophy book is Ram Dass's commentary on the Bhagavad Gita. In fact, I actually have my copy right here. If you guys ever want to do this book too, we can. You can see from the well worn pages how old this book is. You can see all the things I've highlighted and noted in this book. By the way, this is one of the best commentaries I feel like on the Bhagavad Gita is this. It's Ram Dass's Paths to God, Living the Bhagavad Gita by Ram Dass. The Bhagavad Gita is a life changing book as it is. But Ram Dass's notes on it and his teachings on it were truly, truly, truly life-changing. And so, yeah, I mean, I've just written all in it. So if you guys want to do this in the future, let me know. We can read through this. But I would suggest if you guys want to do this book in the future, please read the Bhagavad Gita first before doing the commentary. All right. I started crying just a couple of pages in when Peter calls Mary his sister. He says he knows Christ loved her more than all the other women. He asked her to tell them the other disciples, but Christ told her and he didn't reveal to them. And then Mary responded by saying, I will teach you about what is hidden from you. It's interesting talking about Peter calling Mary his sister because also in the gospel of Mary and some other gospels that are hidden from us, that are not in the canonized Bible, you do see that Mary was slightly afraid of Peter. I've said this before. I'm not a fan of Peter. I think he was a bit of an asshole, if you want my honest opinion. He obviously was not a fan of women and he was very controlling and in my opinion, he sounds like he was like, you know, a 2,000-year-old narcissist. So, but yeah, she does say, I will teach you about what is hidden from you. I remember that from her gospel as well. Her gospel, her vision of Christ has been buried for so long. And yet in that moment, the reason I cried was because her voice felt like validation, as if somehow my entire life already included the scripture as its rule, as the truth I compared all else to. But now I was holding it in my hands, not just in my imagination and in my heart as an ideal. Her gospel was scriptural evidence of what I already believed in. As we moved our way through each passage in Mary's gospel in this book, I also want you to have an overview, a Cliff Notes version of her entire gospel. God is not referred to as the father or the mother in the gospel of Mary, but simply as the good with the capital G. Sin is not inherent to being human. We are not born sinful. Christ says in Mary chapter 3 verse 3, there is no such thing as sin. Sin is not some state of being that must be redeemed. Sin is something we produce within ourselves when we misunderstand the truth of who we are, when we forget that we are not just human. We are not just this ego with constant needs and desires. We are not just this body, but also the soul that inhabit since while we are alive. Sin comes from forgetting and is redeemed by simply remembering that messy truth that we are both soul and an ego. This again is 100% the teachings of yoga 100% and I know that the original definition of sin meant to miss the mark, meaning you just don't know who you are. The gospel stresses the importance of integration. It's not sin, but ignorance of our true nature that creates suffering. Ding ding ding again that is the number one teaching of yoga. We have a template, an image that arises or exists beyond this realm and yet seeks its full expression here. Our work is to reunite with that template with our own angel. This is Mary's emphasis in Mary 5.8, for he has united us and made us true human beings. In John Eve's translation of her gospel, he mentions talking with angels, the amazing account of a group of friends in World War II Hungary who each received messages from their own angel. The only one among them to survive the war is Gita. He relates the passage when one of the angels reminds Gita and her friends, you yourself are the bridge. We are incomplete without remembering this other half of what it needs to be human. To be a true human being is to unite the ego or the self with the gnosis or the soul. A true human comes in being when we complete the connection that exists between the created world, matter, plants, animals and the creating world, angel, arch, angel, light itself. The human is in the middle. So human being is a privilege and a purpose itself to be the bridge between the created world and the creating world, to be the voice of love for the voiceless. Mary Magdalene stresses in her gospel that Christ has united us and made us true human beings. This is why we should praise his greatness because he has united us by showing us the way by becoming unified himself. We are capable of integrating the self and the soul, the image and the analog, the human aspect of us with the eternal self that never changes. What Jung referred to as personality one and personality two, we become undivided and this is the ultimate goal, not a distant salvation given to us through repentance or guilt or shame or Hail Marys. We realize this aspect of who we are, our divinity, our angelic form, the gnosis or the highest aspect of the soul by allowing the soul to ascend. This ascension however is not about going up and over, it's about transcendence. This ascension is about going inward, more fully into our own emotions, our own embodiment to purify the heart. There are seven powers as I mentioned at the start of this book are seven climates as the Episcopal priest and scholar Cynthia Borgel describes them. We need to go through these seven powers and no longer be bound by them in order to obtain the vision that's possible that's actually our inheritance and being human from within the heart. These powers or climates are darkness craving, ignorance longing for death, enslavement to the physical body, the false peace of the flesh and the compulsion of rage. The soul ascends because it does not seek to judge nor does it attempt to dominate anything or anyone and the soul cannot actually be harmed because it does not belong to the world of the flesh. We are here to attain the freedom the soul remembers. We do this by using the spiritual technique that Christ used called kenosis, the path of self-emptying love. It's a spiritual practice that allows us to upgrade from ego or the egoic operating system. It is referred to of viewing others as separate from us to uniting consciousness of soul. Christ led Mary through this process of transformation, this spiritual path of integration, this goal of becoming undivided and that is why she is able to receive a vision of Christ from within her heart. Her self and soul are one. She has become a true human being. She can now teach what the other disciples never learned. She can be the apostle to the apostles as Christ's most beloved companion who mastered the vision Christ attained. Mary is able to step into Christ's ministry as one who acquired his same peace, the one who is connected from within her heart to the same love that Christ made incarnate. At the end of Mary's gospel the disciplines are upset with this revelation, with the teaching that Christ gave to Mary and not to them. They argue and express both contempt and disbelief that Christ would reveal such powerful teachings to Mary, a woman, and not to them. Peter is especially peeved, but one among them, Levi, comes to Mary's defense and suggests that if Christ considered her worthy, then who were they to disregard her? Because he adds Christ knew her completely and loved her steadfastly. Mary's gospel tells the story of a very different criterion for spiritual authority. Souls are not sexed. So the sexuality, sex and gender ascribed to the body are ultimately illusionary. These differences are part of the material world, not the eternal world. We are souls that cannot be defined by our physical form. Spiritual authority cannot be determined by a person's sex, gender, or sexuality, but rather by the depth of their spiritual transformation and subsequent wholeness. Meaning a person attains the spiritual authority to speak about Christ or to proclaim the good news not because of what they look like externally, but because how arduously they have worked internally at uniting the self with the soul. The imperative in Mary's gospel is to become the child of true humanity, which means fully human and fully divine. It means becoming fully conscious of the eternal, unbounded soul while here is the tethered limited human form. And this translation to me is trying and faltering and trying again to cultivate this love inside of us. It means doing all we can do to be in the presence of love. John Yeves describes the emergence of these repressed apocryphal, meaning hidden or secret texts like the gospel of Mary Magdalene and the gospel of Thomas and Philip as an effort of integration of making the subconscious conscious. We have been very aware of the masculine linear, more rational story of Christ, but we haven't heard what has been hidden from us. And what we haven't been ready to integrate is the equally significant story of Mary Magdalene, of the feminine, the cyclical, the non-rational of what waits for us within the next chapter is titled what it means to be saved. When Mary had said these things, she turned their hearts towards the good, the gospel of Mary chapter five, verse nine. In 325 AD at the Council of Nicea, church fathers hammered out the creed of the Christian faith, a creed that's repeated to this day in churches all over the world. I've mentioned it before, I know, but it makes sense to chant it again. We believe in one God, the Father Almighty, creator of heaven and earth, of all that is seen and unseen. We believe in one Lord, Jesus Christ, the only Son of God, eternal begotten of the Father, God from God, light from light, true God from true God, begotten not made of the same essence as the Father. Through him all things were made, for us and for our salvation. To maintain this creed, the four Gospels that were chosen for the Canon of the New Testament, Matthew, Mark, Luke and John, needed to have no rivals. So then all of the Gospels that had existed for almost three centuries as Scripture, sacred to the early Christ movement like the Gospel of Mary Magdalene, the Gospel of Thomas, the Gospel of Philip, the Acts of Paul and Thakla, the Thunder Perfect Mind suddenly became a threat to the budding institution of the church. In the year 367 AD, the Bishop of Alexandria ordered that the monks destroy all of the writing, not specifically designated as canonical. And so we've talked a lot about the Council of Nicea and Constantine. Again, I've done many deep dives on that. Constantine was not the story we hear about Constantine, seeing his vision of Jesus and the cross and all that hoopla was not true. Constantine was mythraic. And so not only did they ban basically most of the Gospel that were supposed to be part of the Christian faith, but they also rewrote the books that we have now, changed the story and made the story of Yahshua or Jesus into one of mythra. So technically, there's supposed to be 777 books in the Bible, but we only have 66 of them if that tells you how much they actually took out. But gratefully, there were many renegade monks, those cops I could kiss who disobeyed this edict, holy rebels. These wise and industrious monks wanted to preserve the Gospel that related to a very different Jesus from the one forming within the church hierarchy. Instead of burning and destroying the ancient texts, these mysterious monks buried them in urns in the deserts and other deep caves. Thanks to the Bishop of Alexandria's Order, Egypt became a land of buried treasures. As you know, the Gospel of Mary Magdalene wasn't among the Nag Kamadi findings or the Dead Sea scroll. However, those discoveries helped contextualize Mary's Gospel and help us understand why all of these scriptures were considered dangerous enough to want to destroy. The similarity between the Gospels found in the Nag Kamadi Library and the Gospel of Mary or the common theological thread is that they all emphasize the importance of remembering Christ within. The Gospel of Thomas especially focuses on the effort of transcending the opposite to become one single, the unified one. And the Gospel of Thomas was actually the very first missing book of the Bible or banned book of the Bible that we read on this channel. Again, I will place the Dark Outpost playlist down in the description box below if you want to go through and listen and look at all these missing books we've covered so far. Again, I do read these on the Dark Outpost on Tuesdays Live and it is a live show. So if that's something you're interested in and you want to start participating in that, if you join the Dark Outpost TV, when I go on on Tuesdays, you're welcome to call in and have the discussion live on the air if that's something you're interested in. So again, I'll leave that playlist down in the description box below and I'll also leave a link to the Dark Outpost TV as well. The path of the ancient Christians was a practice of living remembrance. Christ wasn't understood as a being to follow and idolize, but rather as a master of this path, this transformational process, this path that Christ walked not because he was the only one who could walk it, but for us to see that it could be done, that we could become unified as well. Sophia is the Greek word for wisdom. In the original Aramaic of Jesus and his followers, there was no word for salvation. As explained in the wisdom of Jesus, salvation was understood as a bestowal of life and to be saved was to be made alive. I need to take a minute with this because that's a revolution in thought. Salvation not is something that's one day given or earned by a force outside of me. Salvation is waking up becoming even more alive, more present. It's revolutionary for me because I see how easily it's missed. If we are waiting for an external source about salvation, we are focused outward. Instead salvation comes from within and we achieve this by going inward and participating in a process of remembering the love that's all along just waiting for us to return to it. With the suppression and disappearance of these early Christian text in non-canicle, it is explained that a fundamental shift was established in what theologians refer to as the ultimate destiny of humanity. With the creation of the Nicene Creed, there became a heaven to reach in the future when we die and a corresponding hell to ascend into. There became a clear need to be redeemed, saved before this death, and the saving could only come through Christ and subsequently through the church and the priest who received the apologetic authority to give blessings and the Eucharist. This idea of saving became the promise of eternal life. This promise in turn became the doctrine of salvation, the early church fathers instituted. Our sinful status as humans depended on them, on the church and God's only son Christ to besow mercy and redemption. The doors to heaven now had gatekeepers. The sacred texts found at Nakamati along with Mary's gospel reveal a sociology rather than a doctrine of salvation. They focus not on the process of salvation but on the wisdom of the divine and on the eternal transformation that Christ went through and that we can all go through as well. The gospel of Thomas and the gospel of Philip also emphasize the unique and exceptional relationship between Mary Magdalene and Christ. If the early church fathers were going to establish male authority, Mary's true identity and relationship with Jesus according to these other competing and conflicting early sacred texts from the Christ movement in the first and second centuries, then Mary Magdalene and her profound gospel would have to be buried and her identity would have to be retold as someone far less significant to Christ than she was in all of his ancient scripture. Mary's gospel reveals that she could turn the disciples back towards the good toward God which is an indication that she had followed this path that Christ walked to become unified. It reveals that she was a leader among leaders, an apostle to the apostles and something far more radical and heretical than a prostitute and it's interesting my friend Stephanie who you guys know she's been studying to the relationship between the twin flame souls and the soul split and apparently the divine feminine is the one that ignites the divine masculine. She's always responsible for like igniting him. She becomes the anchor so that's interesting so looking at from that perspective that means that the Magdalene, Mary Magdalene was the ignition for Yeshua and together they became the Christ. The next section is called what it means to be human. Peter said to Mary, sister we know the Savior loved you more than all other women. Tell us the words of the Savior that you remember, the things which you know that we don't because we haven't heard them. The gospel of Mary chapter six verses one through two. There was far less at stake for me. I could ask questions that they simply couldn't because I was an outsider. An outsider not seeking to ever be let in. I was often asked what I was doing there at Union Theological Seminary, a non-Christian among Christians training to become ministers, reverends and priests. Why would I want to devote three years of my life to academic and spiritual rigors of divinity school if I never intended on leading a congregation or even becoming a card-caring member of the church? I don't remember her name. If I ever knew it at all let's call her Barb that feels about right. What I've seared into my memory is that look on her face when she whipped around in her seat in front of me to blast me with one of those harriest eyeballs in the history of humankind. All because I stated what I thought was the obvious. If Jesus was fully human then he must have had sex. If we are studying the Fourth Humissible Council of Chandelion and 451 AD which established that crisis at once perfect in his divinity and perfect in his humanity so not half human, so not half divine and half human 50 50 but rather fully divine meaning 100% and also fully human another 100% doesn't really make sense mathematically but it held me wrapped with attention because it released me from this idea that we were either human or divine. It let me grasp or at least try to that we could be both a saint and a screw up and that would be perfect that would be the whole point rather than a contradiction. The logic for me before I blurted out the obvious about Christ and sex to the whole class went like this if Christ was whole man as Pope Leo the Great said then to depict him a celibate should amount to blasphemy. How many times will it be necessary to repeat the adage of the early church fathers John Eves says that which is not lived is not redeemed or said another way if there's an aspect of Christ's humanity that wasn't lived for example his sexuality then it was also not transformed redeemed. Of course Jesus Christ lived his sexuality otherwise he could not have been fully human according to the Fourth Humissible Council of Chandelion attended by about 500 bishops from all over the world and exactly no women Christ is both fully human and fully divine. Mary Magdalene clearly moves around among the other disciplines as one who has become a child of true humanity and this is the ultimate goal of her gospel to become a complete human being the integration of the opposites within oneself a child of true humanity in the gospel of Mary is someone who has achieved this state of inner oneness it designates that anthrobes the fully realized human being the enlightened master of eastern tradition or the monad or undivided one the cost of taking christ full humanity from him is that the importance or even the sanctity of being human has also been stripped from those of us who want to try to understand his teachings and the cost of Mary Magdalene as christ partner or companion his spiritual equal even has stripped us of a female model of how the process of human love can unite us from within John Yves believes that the rest the restitution of the true character of Miriam of Magdala as a companion of Yahshua of Nazareth can help men and women today realize their potential of their full humanity which is both flesh and spirit both human and divine there were teachings that Mary had ears to hear and that the disciples did not there were teachings given to her by christ in private and or from within her heart peter the disciples trust her and ask her to reveal these teachings because they know that christ loved her more than all other women he loved her more than anyone else but how can that be possible i imagine barb asking as she reads this chapter how can christ if he is god play favorites wouldn't he love everyone equally as rays of light and all that jazz yes and she loved her uniquely among all others this is radiantly clear even if i only ever read the bible i would have to wonder why or find it curious that christ rose to her Mary Magdalene he let her witness him first or he came back for her or she was there all along with him through death as if from within her heart as if a red thread tied them together as if they had prepared for it and her love tethered him to her led him through the darkness to redeem it and then his first words were to call out her name Mary he loved everyone equally yes as he loved himself but he also loved her more than all other women why because barb he was also human mary responded i will teach you about what is hidden from you the gospel of mary chapter 6 verse 3 the greek philacalia was compiled in the 18th century by macareas of cornith and nicodemus of the holy mountain it's a collections of sayings by the hessie cast i probably said that wrong hessie chas is from the creek for stillness rest silent quiet and is a mystical tradition of meditation and prayer in eastern orthodox church this rich and wacky i'll explain contemplative tradition within christianity has been hidden from me up until this point i had only associated meditation with buddhism yet his chasm is an ancient form of meditation that's native to christianity and that has been practiced since at least the fourth century it just never crossed the divide between monastic and secular worlds the hessie chas would curl forward over his heart drawing all of his attention and consciousness there within the quest for union with the divine was attained by bringing consciousness into the heart the earliest mention of hessie chasm is in the fourth century in modern day turkey or constantanople and especially within egypt's in the sayings of the desert fathers and then in the sixth century with st john the turn is used systematically with his theological masterpiece the ladder of the die the ladder of the divine ascent st john of the ladder describes hessie chas as he who being without body strives to restore his soul within the bounds of his bodily home a rare and wonderful feat a hessie chat is he who says i sleep but my heart wake it this is reference to the passage in song of songs chapter five verse two i was asleep but my heart was awake the goal is theos which is an experience of being transformed by the presence of god of pure love is a constant exchange with the divine within the heart and this is what hessie chas held as the ultimate state of being union to do this the hessie chest in egypt would use the repetition of the prayer of the heart to descend into the heart the heart was understood to be far more than the body's most critical functioning organ the heart was experienced as a treasure house saint isaac of syria explains that the sacred aim of the hessie crest tried to enter your inner treasure house and you will see the treasure house of heaven for both the one and the other are the same and one in the same entrance reveals both the ladder leading to the kin kingdom is concealed within you that is in your soul the divine is experienced in meditation as light as a light within the heart that's seen or perceived with the with the noses the noses is said to have a faculty of direct knowing our truth according to the hessie cast and this only comes after clearing our cleansing the heart with the repetition of the prayer of the heart saint simian the new theologian from the 10th century was among the last of what we refer to as the experimental theologian he believed that spiritual authority comes from within not from the apostolic holistic appointment by the church the emphasis of the hessie cast is the experimental theologians was on the intimate inner connection to the divine from within the heart the inner work had to take place or there couldn't be an authentic transformation a transformation that only comes from direct knowing or experiencing the soul similar to mouth you ate blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see god saint simian explains in as much as the heart is purified so it receives divine grace and again and as much as it receives grace so it is purified when this is completed through gait grace a man becomes holy a god professor mcguckan's apartment was covered with icons of saints his wife had painted walking into it at union while i was a divinity student always felt like entering into another world i knew these saints were live to them that they were part of their inner world as much as they were depicted with embroidered robes and gold halos on the walls around them i knew that as an eastern orthodox priest professor mcguckan would further my instruction in the prayer of the heart that penny had initiated for me what i wanted to know was how to pray like the hessie cast he laughed when i first asked him then when he realized i was serious he warned me that this form of prayer is meant for monastic life where you then don't have to go out and cross a busy intersection or interact with a secular world he explained that what happens by focusing all of our consciousness into the heart is a process that breaks down its walls leaving it stripped bare and exposed my raised eyebrows let him know how great that sounded to me i was slowly moving through the old testament in a compulsory course for graduation so ezekiel 3626 came flying into my mind i will remove from your body the heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh he went on to then demonstrate the process the hessie cast would assume during their prayer of the heart they would curl forward bending their necks and their shoulders into an impressive looking slouch so that they could gaze directly at their chest then he explained the breath was controlled during the prayer in the same way that kundalini yoka focuses on the breath with mantra christ's name was invoked with the inhale and then the petition for mercy came with the exhale and all along the initiation is to drop further into the heart to remember that the body can be a medium to access the soul rather than an obstacle okay i have to say something about kundalini yoga it's not kundalini is an all yoga kundalini yoga itself as a practice is not a legit practice okay it's in i have to say in my opinion but you can do all the research it's um it's a scam okay so i guess she hasn't really studied yoga to understand that because i don't know why she would even mention this particular form of yoga because it's not it's kundalini yoga what what they do is they really focus on pranayama which is breath work and that's done in all practices of yoga but what they do in that practice is they actually bring it to the point of hyper ventilation which can cause you to think you're having like psychedelic spiritual experience but it's literally hyper ventilation and so that's something i just want to put out here as a disclaimer if you want to get involved in meditation especially with a mantra that's japa meditation please find a teacher a qualified teacher not someone that's in my opinion allegedly all that stuff for legal purposes teaching kundalini yoga again kundalini is a part of all yoga practices the man who created kundalini yoga was a con artist and there is a lot of a lot of evidence to back that you just got to do your research i would definitely definitely i mean do the meditation japa meditation is amazing and find your a way to do this because this is in all forms of yoga but i would in my opinion i would stay away from kundalini yoga it's dangerous i tried that posture for the rest of my time as a divinity student and made it me accurately aware of several things the template for prayer meditation here is based on a man's body specifically on a breastless chest when you curl forward with breasts especially larger ones the back of the neck of the budding hessie cast would scream bloody murder and you can't enter the heart in the body of the pain or yes you can but the torment of the body is not compulsory there is no interest to the heart that reads if you are not miserable come back later so i updated the hessie cast prayer as any christian with breast in bizantium might have in the fourth century and instead just acknowledge the body before entering the heart whether i was seated or standing alone or in a crowded room i just took an intentional breath and recognized with sincere awe that i could not be here without this body and instead of focusing on the breath during prayer i paid attention to what i sensed once i felt i was really there in the heart i took a second intentional breath to acknowledge that the presence of the soul the nose is right there with me that it takes all of two breaths to be connected again to what's eternal that i have a direct access to divine love at the grocery store while someone's yelling at me as i'm signing divorce papers as my son cries for hours at three in the morning as i pay bills on credit cards that's nearly at its limit as the dread comes over me to do more to be more to help more to see the good in myself and others more frequently and then into the silence which is like going underwater or entering dreams while wide awake the silence is like flipping over in a kayak while white rider rafting let me explain i flipped once when i was rafting the royal gorge in colorado as a daredevil teenager i was in this yellow banana like kayak with a red helmet on i felt confident the technique i had been taught to write myself if i kept sized going over the waterfalls we were attempting to raft i practiced the technique on dry land and to the approval of the instructors what i hadn't anticipated was how deafening the roar of the water is beneath the surface there's a calming rushing sound we're all used to above ground but there's the underside to that sound there's what the river sounds like from within i'll never forget how disoriented i was and i don't know if that was because i was expecting it or if it was simply because the sound itself was so new i never heard the clamoring clash of currents under the surface before i couldn't move it first i wasn't sure which end was up my helmet banged against a series of rocks as i scrambled to find the ripcord on the edge of the skirt that sealed me into my kayak i let go of my paddle so i could search with both hands as soon as i found it i yanked on it with my upside down strength can muster going into the heart for me is loud like that it's like hearing the sound of a river from within it isn't a silence that we understand in silence it's not a silence to void of sound this silence is a silent sound of presence of love within us and can be excruciatingly loud disorienting even it's a new voice meaning one we're not familiar with even though it's the most important we could ever hear it's also new in the sense that it is hidden from us meaning it's the last place we're taught to look for the voice of god right here in our own heart while i was experimenting as a modern day hessie cast at union i was also in a theatrical course in exigenics we were divided into two pairs of two to out act out the rest of the class as a single line from the old testament without using words my partner was a kind quiet which worked well here older bearded man with a limp we were given exodus three which is about moses in the burning bush i had to be the burning bush i knew how happy would make me from that day four to get to say that i performed as the burning bush it still cracks me up you should have seen the way i pan to mind the hell out of it with my arms flaring up like flames and my face took on a holier than thou look when the angel of god speaks to moses as the bushes on fire our interpretation of this moment was that everything that happened actually took place in the heart meaning a bush in gold with flames never actually started speaking to moses it wasn't like the sound of a voice coming over the intercom when you order drive through fast food moses doesn't hear a voice outside of him say from this fiery bush take off your sandals for the place where you are standing as holy ground this is what he hears from with and him when he stops hurting his sheet for long enough to recognize this miraculous sight not the vision of the burning bush but the spirit that moves in him to acknowledge the presence of love that has a message from him from within his heart the burning bush then is symbolic of anything in our lives that disrupt us from the habitual routine the monotony of our everyday and allows us to return to the presence of love so it's interesting we've been talking about this on the dark outpost there is a possibility that i know a lot of people are kind of under this impression now that the old testament of the bible is actually the god of the old testament is actually lucifer and the god of the new testament is source is the good source the good god and i know that the cassio piens i believe it's the cassio piens that say on their board that the burning bush incident with moses was actually demonic that that was a demonic spirit talking to him and i i do actually kind of believe that because the old testament is brutal i don't believe abraham was a good man i you know anybody that has more than one wife is involved in um trafficking if you will so um yeah so i have a very different opinion on the burning bush given what we know now but again this was written before the right awakening so quiet bearded man and i didn't demonstrated this by staring and ending our performance with our hands over our hearts we tried to convey that nothing we're about to do ever really happened literally what we were acting out was the effort of what it takes to remember that no matter what we are doing or who we are with or where we are in the world a mosca temple a yoga studio a department store the ground is made instantly holy the moment we're present enough inside our own bodies to hear the presence of love the lessons i never forgot maybe because i acted it out with my body or maybe because all of humility or maybe because of all the humility required and all that humor was that angels don't speak outside of us the most sacred voice we can ever hear doesn't have a voice in all an angel the voice of god the presence of love the voice of the soul is the sound of silence and this truth can be hidden from us that we contain with chorus every one of us yeah i get what she's saying absolutely absolutely like listen to your own gut but i've actually heard angels literally speaking um so um yeah but i get what she's saying there like you do have to listen to your own gut you do have to go into your intuition because that is the voice of god your gut is never wrong but yeah i have also heard angels speak to so what's been hidden from us has been hidden within us what mary reveals to the other disciples that have been hidden from them is the direct connection to the spiritual world we all contain quite beard man didn't think it was as significant as i did so we left it out but that i thought it was cool that moses introduced himself to the bush i'm laughing after the bush gets his attention and he lifts his head from hurting sheep and he says i am moses so in response to this incedentary voice that was actually sounding from inside of him moses knows who he is he says his own name i thought this was significant because this is what has stayed with me all these years that this voice of love within us is the truth of who we are this is how we can move in the world we can identify with a miraculous unexpected uncontrollable mysterious and angelic voice of love within us we can identify with the burning bush engulfed by planes but never consumed by them and in this way we can live about what is hidden from us all right guys we're going to finish it there today part five a we will pick up next week with how to meditate like mary magdal and it's interesting that we've hit this part of the series because cathard edwards and i are doing a meditation challenge right now so let me know down in the comment section below if you are participating in this meditation challenge with us and again let me know your thoughts on this section once again thank you so much for joining me on this journey i'm again learning right along with you guys and again i dedicate the series to all the magdalans out there please know that the best is truly yet to come