 I want to talk about what is quite possibly the worst computer program ever written. The worst one ever. I've decided today because I had to use this program, I haven't used it in quite a while, but I realized how terrible it is and how, you know, this is one of these programs that everyone watching this video has used many times and you probably didn't even end up hating it because you just thought it was a fact of life when you used it. But it is one of the worst programs you can possibly imagine. Now, I probably put it in the title of this video, but the program I am talking about is Adobe Reader. This is the absolute worst program you could possibly imagine. I was reminded of this today because today I had to print some things out in a library and I got onto their Windows computer and in order to print these PDF documents I had to open them up in Adobe Reader. Now that is a very trying and emotionally transfixing thing to do as I was quickly reminded. Now in order to tell you how bad Adobe Reader is, I think we should make a comparison. Why it seems so terrible to me is of course I use good PDF readers. You know, on Linux there's MU PDF, there's Zathura. These might actually run on Mac as well, I don't know. But of course there are many PDF readers and all of them are better than Adobe Reader. My experience when I use Zathura, for example, which is my current PDF reader, here's how it works. This is crazy. Now I, as you know, I'm just a crazy Linux user who just wants to make things difficult for myself. So when I click a PDF or when I open a PDF on my computer, I want it to actually pop up. I want to be able to see that PDF, I want to be able to scroll through it. So Zathura, when I open a file on Zathura, immediately before my fingers retract from the keyboard or mouse, that file is open, it is visible, I can scroll through it, I can follow links, I can leave bookmarks, I can do everything that Adobe Reader can do. That is what I expect. And again, maybe I'm just a crazy, you know, free software extremist for thinking this is how a PDF reader should work. But let's look at Adobe Reader. What is the Adobe experience like? Adobe experience, registered trademark. It's not actually registered trademark, but what is the Adobe experience like? If you want to open a PDF in Adobe Reader, you click on the PDF, you or however you select it, and what happens first is nothing. There's a brief pause, especially if you're using what I was using, a public computer that only has eight gigs of RAM. There's a pause for several seconds, the suspense builds, it's like sitting in a movie. And then a big red block comes up that says we're loading Adobe Reader, and that is exciting. It's like when, you know, at the beginning of the Star Wars title crawl and Star Wars pops up on the screen, that's what it's supposed to be like. It's supposed to be like, yes, it's finally happening, it's going on. So several more seconds pass, it's loading up whatever modules it needs. And of course, since you're reading a PDF, we have to make sure that you have an Adobe Premium account or a full version of Adobe Reader. So we have to phone home, check whatever metadata is in the file, just to make sure that you are actually using full Adobe. And it's probably also sending your, I mean, it's a proprietary program, it's probably sending whatever metadata it has of you backed, phoning at home or something like that. So you wait even longer, and what eventually happens is your PDF pops up. And when I say pops up, I say it pops up in about 20% of the screen because Adobe Reader, you might think that, you know, you just want to be able to scroll through a PDF document, but Adobe knows better than that. Adobe knows that what you really need is you need, you know, 30,000 title bars with different options, none of which anyone actually uses in a PDF. In fact, you even need to be able to edit a PDF, even though it's PDFs by definition are really supposed to be printable documents. But I mean, Adobe, of course, invented PDFs. You would think that, I don't know, they sort of have an understanding of what they're good for and not good for, but you have to load up all those modules. There's a huge bar on the right edge that is maybe a status bar, maybe a highlight, something else, you know, but it has to be there. You can't just easily get rid of it. So if you want to read this document, you can painstakingly scroll down it, which has a good bit of latency. It's very slow. I think they have a reader mode, but I always forget where reader mode is. You got to click up whatever. It is not like my terrible, silly, hipster Linux program where it actually just works. I can actually scroll through a document. Oh, this is the make full screen button. Oh, this is the, you know, go up and down. This is make a bookmark. Adobe Software or Adobe Reader has all those things, but all of them for whatever reason are just, it's like they got coded, the source code was coded in molasses or something. Everything is so non-responsive. And again, this is on computers that have eight gigs of RAM, which 10 years ago was like a super computer. You know what I mean? That's way more than anyone can use. And if, I mean, if you use Linux or something like that where you have low overhead, eight gigs is still plenty for pretty much any use. But opening Adobe Reader, that is, that is, you know, a step too far. Can't do that. So Adobe Reader gives this terrible, and mind you, you know, again, you should expect Adobe Reader to be the number one PDF program in the universe because Adobe invented PDFs. You would think that they have all the best programming. They know the ins and outs of PDFs like no one else. For whatever reason, every single other PDF Reader is better than Adobe Reader. Every single one of them, no exceptions. Even if you have a hyper minimalist one that just opens the document and doesn't even give you any options, that is better than Adobe Reader because it's such a pain to open up a PDF document. In fact, the way you might even have a negative view of PDF Readers, I know I did back when, you know, back when Adobe still, I guess, got royalties for PDFs. It was very rare to see a non-Adobe PDF Reader. In fact, there might not have been any. So you always had to use Adobe Reader back in the 2000s, the aughts or whatever. So whenever someone sent you a PDF, it was like, oh no, I got to open this thing. It's going to take three minutes again. That's, so everyone is sort of conditioned against using PDFs. Nowadays, I love PDFs because PDFs open instantaneously. I do not send me a doc file. That will take forever to open. Actually, it will take literally forever because I don't open doc files because I don't even have anything that opens them anymore. PDFs nowadays, I love PDFs. They're fantastic. They're a good, well-formatted document, very printable, very everything. I output everything to PDFs. But back in the day, if you were using Google search and you, you know, back then they didn't make it as clear if a search option was a PDF file. And if you clicked on one of those PDF files, that was like, you just had you just really messed up your day because it would take, you know, 30 seconds. Nothing would happen. You're like, why is this page not opening? Oh, no, it's a PDF. And then, you know, the big Adobe Star Wars thing comes up and it slowly loads this thing. And since there's so much latency and even in scrolling, you'd just be like, well, screw it. I'm just going to look for something else and you'd close out of the program after wasting five of your minutes. So everyone who's, who had to deal with this hates PDFs. You've, everyone who's still using Adobe Reader has been literally programmed to hate PDFs because of this. And, you know, my, my perspective at this point is like, I mean, let's say that I'm the CEO of Adobe. You know, I'm sure there are boomers out there who just don't know that there are other ways to install other programs, any of which would be better than Adobe Reader for opening PDFs. And maybe there are boomers out there who are still using Adobe, who want Adobe Premium or whatever. Imagine having a PDF Reader that has like a premium version. I just want you to show me a PDF, but I'm sure there are people out there who don't know there are better options. But if you were designing an operating system or not designing one, but like deciding what software went into it, why the heck would you ever choose Adobe Reader? It is the worst user experience possible when opening a PDF. Even if you're, you know, you're, if you were Apple and, you know, Apple has a pretty special relationship with Adobe. In fact, Apple fans will fight to the death to defend Adobe in most times. But I dare you to defend Adobe Reader, mind you. Even, you know, Apple, why would they integrate this terrible program in their operating system? It's, in fact, I think nowadays they have some different PDF Reader. Someone might be able to remind me, but I'm pretty sure Mac actually finally moved away from that. But my question is why is this program used at all? Why is, you know, why is it that this is the worst possible, it's industry standard, but it is still the worst program, not just for PDFs, but probably the worst program that is still in use of anything out there. In terms, in dollars, the donuts of how much suffering does it cause for what it's supposed to do? Adobe has a fantastic kill-death ratio, because it's just such a terrible program. Now, again, maybe I am just a crazy, hipster Linux user who just wants to make things hard for myself by having a PDF Reader that actually works. But it is my impression that this is pretty much the worst software in the universe, and I wish it would die. I wish I wouldn't have to go to a public computer. It's still plaguing my life, because when I go to a public computer and I need to print something out, Adobe Reader is still there, haunting me. And I was like, why is this program still around? I don't understand, I just do not understand. Next time, I'm just gonna right-click and print document. I don't think that has to open Adobe Reader on Windows, but oh, what a terrible program. But anyway, that is my rant. I'm glad I have a YouTube channel now, because every time in the past I've had to use Adobe Reader, I've always wanted to complain about it, but now I can actually put up a video on it. But maybe I'm wrong, not in that Adobe Reader is good, but maybe there's a program that's even worse than Adobe Reader. And if you can think of one, please tell me. But I think my money is on Adobe Reader as just the worst possible thing in the universe. So anyway, that's about it. I'll see you guys next time. You didn't learn anything in this video, but I hope I channeled your discontent with this terrible program. Stop using Adobe.