 What was the most incredible, transformational thing that you experienced with the ayahuasca this past week? Man, you know I never drunk or smoked prior to this. I never did any of that. So I went straight from being 100% sober to the mother. Monday we did breath work. I never did breath work like that and what came out of me was the spirit of laughter. I was just laughing so hard. Fast forward a little bit. The first day was the craziest day because it revealed to me. It showed me how everything we process, everything we watch, everything we eat, everything we do becomes a part of us. And it showed me that because when I took the medicine, a lot of times they use breath. I guess you know that's how they channel the spirits. After the drink, they say whoosh. And within 10 minutes of me taking my first drink, I was out on the ground. And then that's when they started the music and dancing around and doing the chanting. And that's when they started the smoke. Instantly, I was out of it. And I saw them dancing around and I was like, oh lord, shit, oh shit, they got me now. They about to, they about to harness my organs. They done, they done led me here. Yeah and I ain't told my family about this. How did I let them set me up? That's the first thing. Instantly what I first experienced was fear. I'm thinking like, oh my gosh, now I can't move, now I'm stuck and I'm about to die. I did die. I died over a thousand times, man, and I couldn't get up. And some people call that sleep paralysis, but I couldn't get up. But I was kind of conscious of what was going on. I've never been drunk, but I can imagine what drunk felt like. And I was like fading out and can't move and just like, ugh, and feeling real sluggish. Something wanted to throw up, but it got stuck here. I can remember me beating on the ground because I was like, I gotta make it out of here. I went to hell, dude. I was in hell, man. I was in hell. I felt so much suffering, so much pain. And my girl, sometimes she had panic attacks. And I used to always think like, that's in your head, you just tripping. Why do you always act like that? But for the first time, bro, I went to a world that was nothing but pain, nothing but stress, nothing but loss of hope. And I kept beating. I felt my heart trying to pound and crawl out of that place, right? But I died. Every time I died, it's like the more I got conscious that it was happening. And I kept beating my chest, telling myself, I exist because I was getting lost in the agony and the pain and it felt like it was going on forever. Your heart is burnt. Your skin is, your flesh is burnt. And it comes back and it's burnt again. And I literally went through that and if I had a count on it, I would say a thousand times. It's just agony. Time of the gods and time of us is different. So even though it felt like five minutes, dude, it was years I've been in that place. It was five minutes on this physical plane. One of the things I kept saying I exist because I got lost in existence. I died so many times, dude, I lost my mind. What mother was doing was killing that side, was detoxing. That energy that I was processing and I was going along to believe truth. One of the things, shout out to Amanda J. Rowan. Oh my gosh, I'm gonna marry her when I get back home, bro. She was one of the things that kept me alive, bro. I got so lost in myself, man. It was so much agony. And one thing I asked mother for, one thing I asked for was compassion. But how can you have compassion if you never felt a level of pain, if you've never been through certain things, even on a vibrational level that others have been through to be able to relate. And I felt so bad for how many times I left her in the dark and I shamed her about it. How I made her curl up. Not only did she have to battle in the spiritual world, but she didn't even feel safe on the physical world. And me as her man and looking at as the provider, I couldn't even be that for her. I was too immature to be that for her. And Lord knows I cried for her so that night. My soul cried for her, man. When I woke up, I was being taken through time. I was being pulled through time. And it was almost like I was being Jesus. I was being Buddha. I was being so much people. And it was like the medicine said, this is who you are. It's so weird. And then I remember doing like this dance. And it was like, ooh, I come by, I come by. And it was like this beautiful African dance where I was this big dude and I didn't have too much clothes on. From that dance, it was like people saw me doing it. They walked by. It was like I was in a different world doing it. And they just came and hugged me in real tribe. I said, he's back. He's back. I cried so much, dude. Before this experience, I was a man that prodded myself and being able to hold my own. And my father told me, men don't cry. But that's what happens at the split. Our ego creates this separate identity that allows us to live in the world that we're living in. I just recognize, bro, how strong, how strong and how hard they rose me to be in it and how insensitive I was to people and people in this world, bro. And now my heart is just so open, bro. When your soul and your ego dies in that way, bro. Oh my gosh, man. And that was just a first thing.