 This is why the narcissist doesn't come back. In a lot of situations they will come back in some shape or form. They will try to hoover you after they've discarded you or after you've tried to walk away. They will try to find their way back. And typically on average this may happen about 7 times before it's finally all over. But yes there are situations where there is no hoovering at all. They don't call you on the phone. They don't send you any text messages. They don't show up at your house or your work. They don't try to contact your family or friends. They don't do anything. And instead they just cut you off and they don't come back. Yes there are situations where this will happen but it is actually quite rare. And if you are watching this right now the odds are that yes you are part of the rarity. You are of the few people where the narcissist doesn't come back at all. But you may find that after you've watched this video after some time it may be a few weeks, a few months. In some cases I've heard of the narcissist returning after 10 years. So you may find that in time they do come back. But yes there are some cases where they do not come back. And they leave you with this idea that there is something wrong with you. Like you are not good enough. Like no matter how much you work on yourself, no matter what you try to do you will never be good enough for them. That is how they end up making you feel when it is all over. When they discard you and when they move on. Or maybe it was you, maybe you left them, maybe you had enough. And then they never came back to hoover you after that. And of course there are a few reasons for this. The main reason is because you are probably not susceptible to their manipulation. You are probably questioned and confronted with them. And these types of narcissists, they have big egos. They are very arrogant, very delusional. And the reason for that is because they think they are the best things in sliced bread. Many of them have a lot of options. They may not have much of a support network but who enable us but they do have other options that they are entertaining. Other people that they are involved with. And that is why it is so easy for them to let go of you. Because you have got to think we are talking about narcissists here. And I can tell you that a narcissist, they cannot go a day without supply. They have no inner sense of value, no sense of self. So their value comes from external things from other people. So they can never be alone. They always have to be around someone. But yes, this is why they won't come back. They won't hoover you. And if you are dealing with this type of narcissist, they can actually be quite attractive. The problem is that a lot of people want them. A lot of people occupy their time. So yeah, it will leave you feeling like you are not enough. Like something was wrong with you. But I can tell you that that wasn't the case at all. It is not because of you. As I said, they have no inner sense of value. They get their value from external things. They need a constant source of supply that is available to them 24-7. Someone who when they say jump, they will say how high. And they will jump to their beck and call. And yeah, they just set these impossible expectations that you can never measure up to. This image of perfection that they, these types of narcissists, they adhere to themselves a lot of times. They spend so much time on the physical appearance. They have to be this perfect character. They have to be everything that they think people want to see. And then they project their sense of themselves onto other people. Where they need their supply to be perfect. And then even then, that's not always enough. They need multiple supplies to be exactly what they need them to be. And when you think about it, sorry, I know it's noisy. As you probably noticed by now, no matter where I go, there's always a lot of these noisy bikes. I can't get away from that. I just tried to get away from all the noise up there as you can see. But it looks like there's really no way out of it. So I am sorry about this disruption. But there's not much I can do about it. I was just driving for an hour and 30 minutes to get here outside of the city because I know the last few videos were very noisy. But yeah, this is why these types of narcissists, they don't come back. They won't even hoover you even one time. Because they have other options. It's not just you. If it was just you, then they'd probably just stay with you. They would never have left. And some of them, maybe they're more sociopathic, psychopathic. They may not have other supplies. Maybe they do set such a high standard for themselves. But it's very difficult for anyone to live up to. But because they have this set in their minds, they've already got this image in their heads of what they're looking for. And they're measuring up other people to that. People just can't live up to it. And sometimes they'll try and zone it in on you to make you feel like you're not good enough. But if you just look around, you'll see that there really aren't many people who even fit this image anyway. It's just like a fantasy that they've created inside their minds. It's very rarely anything that they've actually seen in reality. And yet they think that it's something that they can achieve. But it's not you. It's not because you're not good enough. Remember these types of narcissists, they are very superficial. They've got to have the best because deep down they are actually very insecure. And that is why they try to be the best for their target when they manipulate you. They will try to be everything that you could ever want them to be. Some of them may even be histrionic narcissists where they're always trying to entice you sexually to live up to your sexual fantasies. And they can really get a hold on you when they do that because it may be something that you've never experienced before. And you may believe that you're never going to experience that again with someone else. And that is what they will want you to believe as well because that is how they control you by seducing you. Yes, as I said, it's not because you weren't good enough. It's not because of that at all. These are just people who need constant entertainment. They're always looking for the next new toy, the next bigger better deal. And they just set so many standards and expectations that people are just objects that have to live up to everything that they want them to be. When the reality is it's only because they're not good enough for themselves. And they'll never tell you that but then it's actually the truth. When someone holds such impossible expectations for another person it's just for you to compensate where they are deficient. That's all that there is. It's like they're looking at it like, yes, I know I'm never going to be that. So you go out and be that. And then they want to live vicariously through you so then they can feel like they're actually doing something. But then even when you become that they'll try and keep you down anyway because that'll make them feel better about themselves. When they see you because first you might not be that high up in the beginning but then they hold you to these impossible expectations so you climb higher and higher. And then they're looking up at you and thinking, whoa, now you're making me look bad. Come back down from there. So, yeah, in a lot of ways there is no really a way that they can win because it's like in one moment they want you to be better to compensate for their deficiencies. And then in another moment they want to bring you back down because then you'll make them feel insecure. But it's the process of bringing you down in that moment. It acts as a distraction and it helps them to feel not really secure but it just distracts them from their insecurities during that process. So they constantly need that process. They can't really take pleasure in you becoming better. Even though it seems that they're pushing you in that direction what they're really doing is just holding in on your insecurities and deficiencies which is something that we all have, knowing is perfect. We all have things that we can work on but you want to feel like you are perfect to someone to some extent that you will never have that with a narcissist. You will never feel like that because they don't feel perfect for themselves. They feel like there's always something they're missing. They're never satisfied, they always want more. And there is really nothing you can do about that. It's just the way that it is. And it is for these reasons that they won't come back. They won't move again. And while at times you may wish that they would you just become this reflection of their own insecurities. That's all that tends to happen in the end. It's like they want you to be better, they want you to be more. The better you become, the more insecure they become. And then they just end up wanting to destroy you just so that they can take all of these qualities and traits that you had and project and assign them to another person and try and make another person you. Which is crazy when you think about it because they could have just stayed with you but because they're so insecure and because they have to abuse you. There's no two ways about it. It's the only thing they can do. In the end when they get triggered, when they feel inferior they will just automatically lash out at you to try to gain control. So when that happens they have no choice but to take everything good about you and try to assign it to someone else. Even though that may not be what they want to do but they're so impulsive and reckless they can't really control it. They really struggle to control their own actions. They have to go out and hurt people, they have to go out and abuse. It's just what narcissists do. It's what separates us from narcissists because of course we don't want to go out and do that. We don't want to go out and do that at all. We're trying to build. We're trying to cooperate with people, make things better. That's what we're trying to do. But narcissists know they're not trying to do that. And whenever you are around them you will find that you just feel drained and lifeless like a shell of yourself, like a zombie. Because by default all a narcissist can do when they come around you is take, take, take. Because as I said they have no sense of identity, they have no inner sense of value. They take this from other people. They can't generate it from within so whenever you're around them you'll feel like bits and pieces of yourself are constantly being taken away from you. And then they will disown parts of themselves and assign them to you. And then use these parts of you to build their own character which they will use to hold an authoritative position over you. From everything that they've learned about you and what you're about because they have been studying you for a long time. And when they're studying you they see, yes okay this is good, this is bad, I'll take this, I'll take that. I won't take this because this isn't good. And then they use these things to build a character. And that's why at times it seems like they're so strong and powerful because they've stolen parts of you and assigned them to themselves and they've disown parts of themselves and assigned them to you. So you switch roles. But whenever you feel confident in yourself and in your own identity they can't touch you. And that's the same thing whenever they're being themselves there's really not much they can do. There's really not much they can do. I am sweating a bit here. It's very hot today. I enjoy that little walk. But yeah don't let it get to you. I know a lot of you have experienced this. It's hard sometimes. When they just cut you off they just treat you like you never even existed. Like they never even cared about you and the reality is they never did. They can't attach to people properly. They can't experience deeper more meaningful connections. And you can and it just makes them feel inferior every time that they're around you. It just makes them feel bad about themselves. But then they also can't fully detach so they never really move on. A lot of times although they don't come back they may still be thinking about you. And yes they may be wishing that they could come back. But if they know that you've figured them out you're not going to give them another chance. They're not going to put themselves in that position. Where they may be rejected. Where they will feel humiliated by you. Especially publicly. Their false image is very important to them. They don't want to look bad. And if you're not going to validate the false self then yes they do fear that you may threaten to expose them. Which is another thing that they greatly fear. And sometimes they may have taken a fall. They may be in a situation that is getting progressively worse after you left or after they discarded you. And they just don't want you to see that. They don't want you to have the last laugh. If they're going to leave and ever come back they want to do it in a way where you think that they're riding off to the sunset. You think that things are getting better for them. And that's why they left you behind. Yeah they might want you to think these things but that doesn't mean that it's reality. Whatever they want you to think it's typically the opposite. They never want you to know exactly what is going on. Especially when things are very unfavorable for them. So yeah it doesn't happen too often. I mean narcissists they do typically tend to hoover. At least once. Sometimes up to seven times maybe more. Until it's finally all over. Yes in these rare situations. Some narcissists they don't hoover at all. They don't call, they don't text. They don't try to come back. They don't try to get you back. They just give up from the very beginning because they have other options that they believe to be more susceptible than you were. So that's it. This is why the narcissists doesn't come back. If this video was helpful please give it a thumbs up down below. Let me know your thoughts down in the comments section. Share the video. Subscribe. If you'd like to book a one-on-one with me. You can do that on my website. Which is Narcseviver.co.uk And check out my Instagram. It's Narcseviver YouTube and Instagram. I've got new pictures and videos of my travels on there every day. That's it for this one. Thank you for watching and you all have a great day.