 Welcome to the news this evening. We begin the set with critical lyrical missiles prepped to transmit direct through the crown chakra of the world, the internet. The only free frequency for sound, lulls and sharper intellect. No headlines on this show exposing paedophiles or hoodlums, but corporate crime in our kids future in the open. And yes, we will be covering the biggest story to happen, how we are failing as a species to live on this planet. As our fate looms closer, I'll be your host on the roster. Welcome to Juice Rap News with me, Robert Foster. A report on our planet, our memes and sanity, where we ask what on earth is going on with humanity. Our correspondents have been deployed globally, ready for action, embedded deep in our collective consciousness in its fractures. First up, representing the militarist faction, a regular guest direct from the Pentagon, General Baxter. That's right, General Baxter reporting for duty. Tell us what's happening. Any new wars or news of peace? Excuse me for bragging, Bob, but our topic's a fair and policy. The perfect choice of expert voices me. Obviously, I'm overjoyed to report that we've made peace with war. It's been normalized, recognized as a core of daily reality. War is peace? A truly exemplary way to commence this new American century. And to cement the empire this year, we're bringing in a new treaty for peace and prosperity in the Pacific Rim, the TPP. The Trans-Pacific Partnership, but do the people agree? We'll fast track it through Congress while they're deeply asleep. Very kind indeed. But now let us search much deeper, with our resident esoteric Guruji from the alternative medium, Terrence Woonseed. Secrets, follow the rabbit. Down the hole, I supply whole packets of red tablets. Wake up, Neo. This treaty is metatini fast, within a massive, drastic oceanic conspiracy to turn the pacifist, a Pacific Ocean, into the ancient battleground of Atlantis. How? First they cause a giant gyroplastic, then a tsunami. They need to smash the yakuza, Fukushima reactors, leak and radio, act of a sabbath, poison all of the sushi batches. Then the new Hollywood movie programs for stupid masses, pour the signing into law of these genocidal ruthless tactics. He's totally batched. It's true, your globalist fascist. If the treaty's legit, why can't we know the facts and facts in it? It is strange that it's being negotiated and handled. Behind closed doors, away from reporters and cameras. But Bob, we learned from the failure of that actor, that people are just too damn attached to the internet. They're rights, privacy, sovereignty and that crap. Meaning we have the treaty in secrecy and that's that. Speaking of your secrets, have you found Edward Snowden? The traitor? He defected with our data and went and sold them to the Russians. The Russians? Right, that's our chance to cross to Moscow with correspondent Ivan Sakharmanov. Your thoughts? Ivan Sakharmanov. In Russia, where is such a good time for snow sports? So, Snowden, benevolent Russian state, protect political dissident from regime of USSR. You damn commune, capitalist! Hand back our spy! In Space Race News, NASA now need our rockets to fly. And in the race to rape planet, Russia get more resource and not even need VOD. Do illegal wars? There have been protests against drilling the Arctic zone. Protests, you mean lost greenpeace tourists we help get home? Also, Pussy Riot lost in Siberia, could've died, but put in dreads to them. Now they knew name, Pussy Quiet. Ah. Moving on to the colonies. In Australia, where at this time of year people are solemnly honoring the ongoing conquest of the continent, correspondent Ken Oathgan, are you celebrating? Ken Oathgan, tell us what's going on. Solid rock, we're standing on Stolen ground. The problem now is the ocean where sharks and boat people are bound. How are you dealing with them? Walk in the pack, we feed the boat people to the sharks and then we kill the sharks. Is refusing refugees legal? Mate. Is any of this legal? Our crime minister says this is the war on boat people. Didn't your ancestors arrive there on boats by sea? Straight, it was empty then. We came on the first fleet. I see. Turning now to tax and finance with Max Kaiser. Oh boy, feeding boat paper to sharks in Australia? I know what you're thinking, hell. That sounds a lot like the central banks of what the door went at the nation's wealth. White Stacey? Uh, Robert. That's it, they just rob it. How can we stop it? Buy past the fence pockets, collect our currency, we've crooked our currency. That's the solution. Behead the faces with the self-arrax revolution. Revolution. What pop culture got to say? Russell Brandt? What Robert? Am I a mere celebrity? Am I not a man? Ain't I got brains, synonyms, metonyms in my gut account? What if I spoke all grand eloquent? Would you better understand? In Kaiser, revolution's my idea. Sorry, sir. But do you have a plan? I don't. Bitcoin. Buy today. Bitcoin. I'm the Messiah. I've got Jesus head. Watch it swear. Her English lady. Wait, is he? Is he? These impactors is when a prophet doesn't get laid. I'm the true prophet. Not my stage. Fear is your only God on the radio, kneel and pray. Find my DVD today. Revolution. Can I have gas? Bang, bang, car. Okay. For today, we'll have to delay these great clashes, which we'll come to cover in subsequent dispatches. But before we advance to our final stage of analysis together, here's Sage Francis with the weather. We've been weathering the storm of local warnings about global warming, but what about that beautiful red dawn when you awoke this morning we're suffering a cold front from motherfuckers who call front. Is one coat enough? No, Robert. Bundle up. The cold war is still in effect. It's got a chilling effect on the press. Dissonance disseminate information, which is dillon-esque because a hard rain is going to fall. It may be frozen in a high pressure system of whistle blowers till we're snowed in. Moving on to Google view Spokam. You see a fog of war slowly moving from the U.S. to Iran and Australia. We're heading for at least three years of lows in Yemen. We're expecting a high chance of scattered strikes from drones. Your Sage forecast to end with tonight. The picture looks bleak, Robert, but expanding worldwide. The winds of change are in our range. They're finally in sight for Juice Rap News. Sage Francis, good luck and good night. And that concludes our views on the news this evening. So much occurring, but is there a meaning? What is our story? Who's writing it? And where is it leading to? Seeking true bearings, we seem to turn to the news. But take heed, for the medium is the message. And this most viral meme on the planet is now the method for defining collective reality each night. If it's not on the news, it didn't happen, right? As history, our story is played out in day to day events and journalists are like the story is of the present tense. At this crossroad between ruin and the stars, can we afford to have news that is blind to who we truly are? We're no innocent spectators and bystanders, but accomplices and players in all that happens. And that's the news that's most urgently lacking. Join us for more juice when Rap News is back again.