 I'll get to drink at this lovely bar out there to see the show. And thank you Dominic for inviting us to support this amazing festival. It does support the room which is our workspace for women theater artists. The things we're doing this year include our new residency program with Audrey residency which many people who are here tonight. A residency program that involves working on a piece and then just also just hanging out. So the New Yorkers jam, which is our early career theater maker. What's up? So thank you so much for coming. Enjoy everything and thank you Dominic. Thank you. Two things. Number one, the One Minute Play Festival. We are a community-engaged organization. We invite playwrights living in different communities into our playmaking process. We do not tell them what to write about. We rather look at themes and ideas that emerge across the spectrum. So this is our way of saying, here's a barometer project. You're supposed to be able to set up a post-it story that speaks for where this community of artists are right now. This work is so much more about the collective than it is the individual. Which I might need to think about and take a picture. And we are also streaming on the internet tonight. We are partners at HowRound.com on HowRound TV. You can find us, hello camera. Those of you in the audience, if you're going at the end, just make sure you're very gentle walking around it. You can find the archive tomorrow on HowRound TV. And you can also find the feed on Twitter with hashtags OneNPF and hashtags Nuclea. That's it. Thank you guys so much for being here. And now the first George Sand communication. Let's play this one. What the fuck? Cabbage. Sometimes I had already shredded cabbage. Oh so do I. I must have had anything wrong with that. Neither do I. Zero calorie, zero. I try to buy organic. So do I. But sometimes. What grosses me out is meat. I'm not a meat eater, so. It grosses me out knowing how they kill them. I know. I know. Realistically, I'd like to be 153, you know. But I'm a large-brained person, so. I'm shrunk. Really? I'm bling-bling. What's this out in my mind? This is woman. 50s. Wearing 20-year-old clothing. Oh. Don't do that. They will always win. 20-year-olds will always win. I just wear cotton. I don't see anything wrong with that. No. It's organic. It's from the fields. Fields. No, I don't see anything wrong with that. Hey. I'm sorry. What's that? Sorry. You just look so much like... I thought for a minute you were this guy. I thought you were someone I know. New. Oh. No. No. Yeah. I see that now. It's not actually that you look exactly like you looked, but that you look exactly how I think you would look if you were your age. How old are you? 32. Yeah, crazy. He would have been 33. It's just, you really... It's super strange. Sorry. Thanks. Shut up. Learn for yourself. Be quiet and do. Take the ring. Take the baton. Stop thinking. Run, run, run. Get to the bar. Hold on. Let go. Get to the bar. Hold on. Let go. Run, run, run. Get low down. Get under it. Sink right under it. Sink right under it. Sink right under it. Sink right under it. Sink right under it. Get your tip. Right above the fat. It's almost a little bit strange. You should not be so wide. Line out and take the IV. Line out and rot. You can rot the body that's dead. You can rot the body that's dead. Easy. Maybe you should release consciousness. Just rot into your right leg with someone. Be easy. When you lie down, he's rotting his skin. Just lay him right on the floor. Be easy. All out. Nope. Anyhow, now I'm thinking too much. Close your eyes. Shut up. Learn from yourself. Be quiet. Listen to your body and not your mind. I need to spit in your mouth, and your tongue between your teeth. Because you're spit is yourself. Shut up. And you want to be quite, you want to be quite. Just sit down. Listen to your body. I can't. Listen to your body. Listen to your body. Be down low. Be down side. Don't think. Stop. Run. Run. Run. I'll just love a bed. He's not at least an alcoholic. His way to live for me. If you haven't done 10 months, minimum on right, It's a really bad sign if he hasn't beat the shit out of me at least once Wait No No, no he hasn't it's really embarrassing Hey ladies Massage Big strong hands on my back neck legs need me press it all out Need me squish me ring me like a pasta machine and we're late. So I sit like my mom's like and see it escape my body schmoozing and the deadlines the broken down toys Contra troops showdowns a kind of setting clients the gym prayer at home So I can't work at home in the running downtown to get to the parent-teacher conferences that were actually on Wednesday It was supposed to be for drinks in that gallery drank too much I'm meeting the morning after the four-hour meeting that should be assistant who says as I look up for my phone with the 17 messages How do you do it? I just don't know how you do it all Did you hear about the tornadoes I saw the pictures but we're still here and soon there will be more of us I Creature got more rain this week than it's gotten in years If that happened to us here, I would still want the couple in Croatia to get pregnant. But why this isn't gonna get better We agreed on this before we even got to second base. I know it's a lot of pressure, but we're doing it I'm not letting you back out of it. Oh well stop saying ready Freddy, but we're bringing them into well Well, we can't protect them. We can't protect them from anything They can get hit by a car become disabled playing crash cancer as an infant We just have to do what we want and come for the best Will you shimmy again? It's kind of a turnoff to have to convince you I believe in that I Positive energy good things happen when you think positive do yoga Raw milk my gender. I'm proud of all the things I have done and will do I am special I know that the universe sends me messages has plans for me for purpose I think it is the key to everything You know, this is the best part of my day when I hey look, I know we talked about holding off, but I Person really you don't think it's too soon. I like state. What? What does that mean? I didn't mean oh my god Is this are you a real person? What is a real person that's a mentions, but I'm just working right. Yeah hit me up when it's good for you We books on your phone. I find this station would not make things better City used to be filled with people talking I'm looking at each other was seriously Unfiltered Monitored so wanted you felt on display splayed forth for all the scene and soon it was like being a walking chocolate mousse Don't give me phone just fine It's good right it is it's like to see their daughters looking at someone the way you're looking at life I was in Gmail my whole day was in Gmail and I was meeting people there And I was chatting with people there, and I was feeling joy and sorrow and pain and anxiety And fucking up, but I couldn't go for a walk outside. I got here with the outside of nature I was in Gmail all day, and I couldn't get out Wild and I was weeping and I was feeling chilled and I got a bunch of rainbows and water around Brooklyn have you had some time to tense yourself? No, no I mean what it's my music when I put my phone in at my computer. So I like the way they look I like that they stay long like working. You have those Virginia slender like real slim and long like fingers long fingers Elephant you just get so sad when they burn out at just a bunch sure if you hold it, right? I like that to say what every time you know, it's in my phone like it knows me. That's what I'm saying no Yeah freaking me out with a cloud Oh Nope, nope never No, no Architect who looks short and new it's to match. What's Jeff? Yeah, I'm not keep playing no, no I should be Everybody's doing it literally my grandma. I mean my grandma doesn't do it. Well, she probably would but she's married Yeah, it's everybody It's to be a sheep You're hungry. It rains. There is rain. You are wet. There are fleas YouTube is a very warm and dry medium You too does not have fleas Come here look at my eyes I will tell you with my eyes what it is to be a sheep Authenticity is never pretty and I have fleas, but at least that can throw it Oh Thanks again me too, I remember less dancer, so obviously my feminist I'm not a feminist that's fucked up. I'm post-feminist that isn't a thing sure it is. No, it's not Well, at least I'm not a slut I know I'm just saying well don't what I'm just supposed to sit here and shut up because I don't agree with you That isn't what he was saying This looks great I hate the taste of my own cooking Okay, let's see there Okay, open now don't look at the light Oh, yeah, there's something there. Okay, don't look at the light. Don't look at the light over your eyes. Okay Oh Yeah, that's something we can fix that really absolutely up. Okay. Okay. Okay. All right now. Don't bite down Don't bite down. Okay Don't buy I said don't buy down. Well, I can't help you if you hurt me I've been flashing people on the corner as I walk by which corner to Chauvin Broadway and try to give me when I went to vote He stays in this car though, so at least there's that He's too lazy to get out of his freaking car. Maybe he's disabled. Oh, you don't have to be younger anybody to be a pervert He was like I voted for an afro Wait, did the flasher have an afro? Oh It's my dad Sorry, what's on? Oh modern family Okay, no No No, oh sister handled you put me through ahead of the time the vulgarity of at all those texts Johanna, I know I'm so devilishly. Sorry. It's that in your hand. I baked you a cookie treat It isn't poisoned. Is it darling if it were poison The first thing you would feel is searing abdominal pain followed by explosive diarrhea No, you're only thick and dark you would succumb to shock and then dearest You would die. Do you deserve to die? You switched the salt for sugar, haven't you? I'm rubbish at baking. I'll say Ice flow sometime in the near future. I understand that you're one of the last remaining polar bears. How do you feel? Do you have any last words? It was seals and sea lions. I spent my time I was bereft when my dad died polar bears are full of musk but when there's only one male left you hang on to him Time is early now soon it will be too late The sharks are circling Thought that when I was old I would at least grow more wise instead of growing more silent I haven't even been able to save my other children You spread your sickness into the land you fill it into the sea soon everywhere will be too warm for a health insurance Thank you for the government is going to shut down That big Melomatic source Not again Lance to liver transplant safety's mom baby to your feet Yeah Something super ingenious like a desk chair or something but like right there on the bottom of her feet I bet I like winning award for that Toby have you seen all their awards? ridiculous So Does it itch? Not yet It's not supposed to at first according to the site, but then it's supposed to itch for like the rest of your life It's good. Oh god. Yeah keep eating. You could stop me So pretty here Those children without shoes don't worry about their feet When we were growing up we were never allowed to go barefoot with these kids I don't think they have shoes. How much you get them some shoes? Don't stop eating Last bite aren't you afraid we're gonna get soaked it smells like rain your trick me acting up grandma Something like that little water never hurt me. I tell that the wicked witch of the west Wait, you're so nice. Everyone starts out nice I guess so everyone in the whole world starts out nice I see your point Don't worry about it There's more of that could you eat some more? Are you sure? If there's rain You keep eating I'll try to stay nice You have to decide Well, I don't like my choices. Give me different ones. Those are the only choices Cut off my left foot or cut off my right. What kind of choice is that? It's not even interesting like if I had to choose between an eye versus an ear It clearly states to receive the inheritance you must cut off one of your feet Number one is up to you My parents didn't have to do this Times have changed You're lazy, fake one I have kids You know what? I can't, you're the sole beneficiary So you're gonna force me to cut off one of my feet no matter what? If you don't like it Then Don't make your children do it Fuck that If I have to date Dan well I'll have to They'll have to grow up sometime It's so hard to be an artist Shut up! Being an artist isn't the hardest thing in the world Do you really understand it now? Yeah There's a delay, someone said I heard someone got shot there last month I heard that too There's supposed to be a band It picks people up It's free Someone else get shot? No I hope not Is this the life of the band? The band that goes to the clinic right? The clinic is for females? I'm having an abortion Where's your girlfriend? It's for me I mean I never thought any of this could happen to me I don't want a baby I need to take off work just to be here I cannot afford any of this 27, 53 Yeah, I'm sorry And I have something It's just we got bought last year by a company And they got rules and no exceptions I'm sorry Sometimes outside is better mom There's times inside has done But I can't be mom It's okay Oh, Manson Vladimir Putin Honey Boo Boo What's working? Something wrong with them They need surveillance cameras, toxic glue from China But there are valleys of wood varnish They will abandon them And let them on 35th Street Might be bedbugs That was a different era A time when people and furniture could be trusted We should have taken them Now you can get to their left Handing off That was a play about race Everyone was white The most important thing to me Being with my family is the most important thing to me Getting shit right is the most important thing I'm not even painting Writing is who I am and this is important to me Marking to me is breathing Listening to you perform is as important to me as breathing Having it created out Being a mom, my family is survival Having the script book is the most important thing to me Out of it Allow me to elaborate My relationship with God So we're spreading awareness Peace of mind is the most important thing to me Don't allow people to mess with your head Lisa Can you tell me what you both did wrong? We should have refused to enter Okay I see the inherent flaw in the system Assumptions will be made If you refuse to answer Which begs the question What does it mean if you refuse to answer? Yes, no Guilty Not guilty So if refusing to answer Questions only leads to existential end games Then answer Lisa Can I be excused? Are you sure? I speak English Okay You're not stupid You want to see the sonogram? No Are you sure? It will be the only time you get to see your baby No I have to do it anyway Just let me know if you change your mind I won't Okay, are you ready? Yes Do you have any questions? No You don't have to do this now To be in love like that All my kiddos and I love you You're just rude There nobody does that here She says She shows her mother the wide Arizona night The glitters like the frozen fog Sparkers, sparks The ocean is so god damn big She says She shows her mother the rolling roll That bores the shores of California day in Day out The blooms of cherry trees in spring in DC When I was two I spitted my head She says to her mother Who hears from the deep bits Next to the beep of a morphine machine Drowsing her down to sleep A chance to drink She says Standing in a small room On a hall of small rooms On an earth Of small, quiet rooms I don't know What do you know? You dig How deep do you dig? Six inches down Like this? Like this You place the bow Roots down to the ground Point facing up to the sky You toss in some bone meal Some dried blood You cover it up, tamp it down And you wait The sun is sharp It's clear Days of fog and mist Bitter days Quiet days Followed by Weeks of snow And days of rain And then Under another blank of snow The green tips Longer days And when I am gone When I am not here to see The flower On him Don't you remember what the doctor said? No And all those articles in the paper What articles? We waited too long What? You're 57 years old That can't be Happens in the blink of an eye And all of the medicine And all of the science It turns out it can't turn back time We fell asleep in our chairs because We were old And we can't see straight I'm afraid so We all were A king bent once Old days Remember Mothers Sisters We used these words Because we knew if we were not sisters then We'd be crushed As days pass As nights burn By the glass jar of memory We are stronger now Not wiser Because really who And if we sang Glorious hymns We'd be home Are you pregnant? I'll take you to the house Just tired You should tell them I love you We love you And never forget that Really? I could make myself hate you I would be able to say goodbye I love you enough You would stay forever But it's all the things I love about you That seem to creep back in despite all the casual fucks I've thrown in your face I've had some amazing fucks They weren't as good as me I know You wanted to say goodbye to you I'd have to say goodbye to all the things I love about you Like your cartoon laugh Like a small truck Or that horrible plum sauce And rice you always made on the holidays Or the way you squint your eyes When you're listening to surf music Or the way your feet smell And wearing the same socks for three days This is how it's supposed to be There This guy, don't you think? Listen, speak to each other Widows, remarry Carbon dioxide is released into the air Animals behave like Animals Shatter What? I said lovers sigh Hearts break Snow falls Sleepers wake Accidents are witnessed Groundbreaks We forget Humiliation occurs I love you Arm yourself with body armor The heart eats one, two, three Steady Or take the bullet Racing to win Flutter flies back The rib cage opens the bones We're faking it again When I'm set free I know Burning mess that's left behind The smoke rising On the ashes Walk like skeletons On Halloween Splint seeking out A kind of rehabilitation The crack is cracked Wacked, hacked open Hacking has happened I've had big ones all along They've been here in ducks And ones that are smaller than ducks And the trees up there Are oak trees or beech trees They're oak trees You know when Shakespeare was a boy People do the name of every plant And seed and berry around here And I'm standing here like I think she'd go inside But it's really I have no idea where they went Nobody knows exactly what's going on Hey, everything is okay It's been a long time Yes You still want to be married to me? Yes 99% sure We'll go with that That's moths Those are ducks Yes That's four You Todd? Yes, yes I am I've been excited to be your roommate Me too I've heard this for so long Where are you from? I'm from here Which high school did you go to? No TV, no messy language Is that? Sure, of course Have you not been on the internet before? No Don't click on that What's a pop-up? It's bad Hot Christian singles? Want to meet me?