 What we're all doing right now, believe it or not, is we're actually making the case for why you should, if you do have a workout partner, you should pick the perfect workout partner. Because everything we listed, really what we're pointing to is the fact that we've worked out with workout partners that weren't perfect for us. Like you just said, I don't wanna talk about drama. I'm not there to talk to somebody. Well, imagine if you had a workout partner that understood that. They showed up, fist bump, headphones on, we do our thing. Like picking the perfect workout partner is, to me, like it goes like this, this is gonna sound funny, but it's like, you pick your spouse, that's very important. Your business partner, workout partner. Like it's up there, like of how important it is that you pick the right person, because it could make or break your workout. It could cause injury or help you prevent injury. It could get you better results or worse results. What's up, everybody? Here's the giveaway for today's episode, Maps Anabolic. This is the Maps program that started it all, still the most popular Maps workout program. You can get it for free, but you gotta do the following. Leave a comment below in the first 24 hours that we dropped this episode. Subscribe to this channel and turn on notifications. Do all those things, and if we pick your comment, we'll notify you when you get free access to Maps Anabolic. Also, we're running a sale right now on a workout program bundle and on a workout program. Okay, they're all 50% off, so here's what they are. The program bundle is the starter bundle. It includes Maps Anabolic, Maps Prime, and the intuitive nutrition guide. That whole thing, 50% off its retail price. The program that's on sale is Maps Split. This is a bodybuilder style, high volume body part split routine. Again, that's also 50% off. So if you're interested, go to mapsfitnessproducts.com, click on one of those two things, or both, you can get them both, and use the code MAY SPECIAL for the 50% off discount. All right, here comes the show. Let's talk about whether or not you should have a workout partner. Well, let's start with you because you said on the show that you hate training partners. I never like to work out with training partners. Why do you hate them so much? Okay, well, first of all, let me be clear and honest. The first probably five to eight years, I would say eight years tops. I had a workout partner and all kinds of different workout partners, but I was also at a very different phase in my training career and also my level of knowledge and understanding how to train and how to program was minimal still even at year five, I would say. Once that came full circle and I realized like, oh, what does my body need and what should I be doing? I started to realize quickly like, oh, the advantages of having a workout partner actually feed into what I shouldn't be doing more than they feed into the things I should be doing. Let me guess, you're talking about, I used to think the same thing like, well, I need a training partners, how am I gonna do force reps? Yeah, how am I gonna push myself? Yeah, yeah, and I need it for safety because I need a spotter there because I'm doing so much weight. It was centered around pushing yourself, spotting and motivation, the three things I probably talked the most shit about now. Yeah, I hear. So when you hear me say that, because I know I always get people that like, because I know there's people. Because there's lots of people that have great experience. There's lots of people that have, yeah, they have incredible workouts with their partner and they've created a consistency around it and that statement is not for you and that's whatever. It's my own experience and where I've come full circle in my training regimen and I at one point was very attached to having workout partners and would say the same things like, oh, I'm so consistent because I know someone else has gotta be there and I'm the type of person where we say we're gonna be at six, I'm not the type of guy who just, I'm not flaky like, and even if I don't wanna go because I know I'm committed to seeing him, I'm gonna go, right? So I could make the case why it was so great early on but later on I realized that these forced reps and training to failure and this intense training or following just what the other guy was doing were all the wrong things for me. Yeah, I've had training partners, I'd say 90% of my workout career is on my own, 10% I've had workout partners and I've had good and bad experiences. Some of the worst I can think of, there was one guy I worked, I won't say his name, but there was one guy I worked out with where it was a constant ego fest and really what it was was I was way more advanced and I was way stronger than he was. So I had to watch this guy constantly add weight to his bar, shorten his reps, do crappy form because he wanted so bad to lift the weight that I would lift and then being a trainer, it was like, it just ruined my workout because I was on a chalkboard for you. So I'm like, come on, dude. And I would say to him like, you should probably go lighter. No, I could do it. And I'm watching him do his shitty form. And then we're in a gym and people are watching and I'm like, dude, I wanna wear a shirt that says I'm not working out with this guy. You know what I mean? I don't know him. So he was terrible. And then I've had great workout partners and you know what's funny the few workout partners that I've had that were good were all women. Oh, interesting. And it's because... It's about your strength level. No. Yeah. Hey, dude, I tell you. No, what is stupid. What it was was that there was no ego involved because it was understood that the weights were gonna be much different. I'm not trying to lift as much as them and vice versa. And it kept me smooth with my workout. Versus when I work out with a guy. Now I just told you about the worst one but let's say I work out with one of you guys and you guys are smart. You know what you're doing. Inevitably, if I worked out with you guys in week in, week out I'm probably gonna push myself harder than I should more often than not because we're closer in strength and we're more likely to... Subconsciously, the competitiveness is still there. Yeah. You can't really like deny it. You know, that's the part about it. It's so subconscious that you don't... I don't even feel like I realize until after the workout. And I go like, I was not playing. Man, I beat myself up. Yeah. Like your friends like, you know if I worked out with Justin and we're doing a thing and we're both smart, we know what we're doing. I'm like, yeah, I think I'm done. And Justin was like, I'm gonna do three more sets. There's something inside of me. Are you gonna do more? Yeah. Something inside of me is like, well, you know, I'll do some too or whatever. Or he adds a plate to the bar. You know, I'm gonna be like, all right, I'll try a couple reps with, you know with that, that ends up happening. But when I worked out with women, first off, women are less likely to do the ego lifting. That's just the fact. Okay, it's just my experience. Yeah. And second, the strength differential was so big that they weren't trying to catch up to me because it was futile. And I wasn't trying to catch up with them. So we would do appropriate weight and it was just a much better, more effective workout. So. Yeah, I've had a few workout partners of my day, but it really never aligned. It just, it would last for maybe like a month and it was the inconsistency factor or it was the just discrepancies between the amount of weight we're lifting and it just, and then the whole time I just felt like I was leading, directing the entire workouts every single time. I just got exhausting. Like you're training. I could do this to myself. Like why am I, yeah, exactly. Why am I just training? And again, a lot of times I'd want to kind of pull my friends in because I felt like, you know, this is also a way that I can help kind of get them in shape while I'm working on myself. But you just get burned out and it totally kind of changes the dynamic of what a workout means to me. Well, you just said something too that reminds me of like the transition I made later on in my lifting career of my training, training being this like beating myself up versus something almost more meditative. So as I got later in my career, it became like my sanctuary like to go and work out. And so having a partner that I had to talk to or plan the workout for like, it would disrupt that. So, and I know you talk a lot about that now. Like that's you of all of us, you know, swear by I have to have my hour because it is your place to center yourself. It's your no distractions. Yeah, and I can totally relate to that because later on in my lifting career, that's what my workouts tend to be now. They're more therapeutic, I would say, than they are chasing goals or PRs. And so I don't want somebody in my, like I definitely don't want a friend who's telling me about the drama with his girlfriend or the bullshit he's dealing with at work when I'm like trying to be in this like, you know, meditative state where I'm like working inward on myself or I'm just being relaxed or I'm just thinking about the weight being present. Yeah. Like so. What we're all doing right now, believe it or not, is we're actually making the case for why you should, if you do have a workout partner, you should pick the perfect workout partner because everything we listed, really what we're pointing to is the fact that we've worked out with workout partners that didn't, that weren't perfect for us. Like you just said, I don't want to talk about drama. I'm not there to talk to somebody. Well, imagine if you had a workout partner that understood that. They showed up, fist bump, headphones on, we do our thing. Like picking the perfect workout partner is, to me, like it goes like this, this is gonna sound funny, but it's like you pick your spouse. That's very important. Your business partner, workout partner. Like it's up there. Like of how important it is that you pick the right person because it could make or break your workout. It could cause injury or help you prevent injury. It could get you better results or worse results. I'll tell you one that almost never works. Now for me, this worked out well because I did workout for a while with my wife and we were great workout partners. It was a good time, but usually as a trainer and a gym manager, whenever I'd see couples work out together or a husband and a wife or boyfriend or girlfriend, they're like, yeah, we're gonna work out together. I remember I would always think, oh boy, this is not gonna work out for it. And it almost never did. It never did for me. It almost never did. Katrina was the first ever. So for 30 years of my life, no girlfriend training at all never worked out. Because for me it was, and this is my experience, right? So I take training very seriously and everything down to the mechanics, to the flow of the workout, to the rest periods and things like that. And that's like, I've learned to internalize that. I don't have to verbalize it when I'm working out myself, but when I have another person who and with a partner, a girlfriend or spouse that tends to get disrupted a lot. And then when I would try and like get us on track, like they would giggle or think it's funny that I would be so serious about it. And then it would just be, it would never ended well, dude. So early on I figured that out. I was like, no, I won't do that. Well, I've seen just managing gyms. I've signed up couples before and they're like, yeah, we're gonna work out together. And I'd sign them up, of course. But I think in the back of my head, like, all right, we'll see how this works out. And I've seen them, you know, like arguments on the workout floor or whatever happened the day before carries over into the workout or one of them's more serious. The person takes a personal. It always starts with like the push-up, claps together. Stupid. The crunching kisses and then the fight. You know, it just doesn't last. Yeah, it just usually doesn't work. But if it doesn't, it works out great. So I think what we should do is talk about how to pick the perfect workout partner. Cause we're really making the case that picking the wrong person can really ruin your fitness and your workout. Just like picking the wrong spouse can ruin your life. You wanna pick a good workout partner. So one thing to consider is this. And you have to, by the way, all the things that we're gonna go through here, you have to be very honest with yourself. Cause I'm about to say something and I know most people are gonna think one thing, but the truth is half are in one place and half are the other place. So you need to ask yourself honestly, should I work out with someone that's gonna push me or should I work out with someone that's gonna pull me back a little bit? Now, being honest with myself, the last workout partner I should work out with would be someone who pushes me. Somebody who pushes me, who I already have a tendency to push myself too hard is going to result in overtraining, injury, lifting too much weight. I do not wanna work out with a hype, you know, motivation, extreme person. For me, as awesome as that may sound, sometimes it's not gonna work out very well. And I know most people watching this are thinking, yeah, I need someone to push me. Be honest with yourself. Cause a lot of people actually need someone to pull them back. That's why I found working out. The client that I think needs to push or the client that like has a hard time even finishing a 30 minute workout because they wanna just stop. They're like, oh, I'm bored or I'm over it or I don't like this. Like that person maybe. But if you're- You don't have the mental discipline yet. Yeah, if you're already like a pretty consistent, hardcore training person, like thinking that you need it. I mean, now you're falling in the trap that I fell on when I was in my 20s. I loved to train. I was already trained seven days a week and then I wanted a workout partner who was gonna push me harder in my workout. Like, which is not what that person needs. I probably needed someone to pull me back. Right. So pull back would be someone who's like, hey, you know, you're going too heavy or let's slow down a little bit or let's take a longer rest or hey, let's try this exercise instead of that. Pushed is like, I think you could do more one more rep or you know, last time you did 10, you know, let's try 11 more. She maxed out today, bro. Yeah, maybe not that. But you gotta be honest with yourself because they're gonna compliment you or they're gonna be a detriment to you. And I identified and by this took me a long time to figure out that I need someone that's gonna pull me back more. Someone's gonna keep me my ego more in check versus push me. Cause when I work out with the push me type workout partner it would just, it would just not end up. Yeah, I totally agree. I'm in the same position where I'd rather have somebody kind of slow me down and you know, really focus on the technical aspects of everything. And I did have a friend of mine who was a trainer who was really good at that and who would also had a completely different skill set. And so his focus was, you know, he had a lot of martial arts experience and he had a lot of like interesting unconventional type lifts he knew. And so every now and then he would teach me things which I thought was very helpful for me to incorporate in the workouts. Yes, here's another one you should ask yourself. Like, do you like to lead the workout or do you wanna follow? Some people they wanna work out with a workout partner and they wanna be like, hey, I wanna follow your workout. Like I'll follow your workout. I'll do whatever you say, whatever you do. This is what I enjoy. I don't have to think about it. I feel like that works in the relationship when you've got the friend who's the experienced trainer and you're the, you know, software engineer. Well, that's true. You know what I'm saying? It's like, I got my buddy who's like, this is his wheelhouse. So I'm gonna let him rock. That's totally true. And it could work, right? Because if you're both trying to lead, it's not gonna work. This is why we don't work out together. Justin, Adam and myself, we've now had mine pump for seven years. We've worked out like what I mean worked out together because we've worked out together, but not together. Like we're all in different parts of the gym but we've all actually worked out together together. I think two times if I'm not mistaken. Less than five for sure. Yeah, definitely less than five. For that reason right there because all of us like to lead, I don't wanna work out with someone who's gonna lead the workout. I wanna do my workout. If you wanna follow me cool, if not, then go do your own thing. But someone may be the opposite. Someone may be like, hey, I wanna show up and do someone else's workout. And that's totally fine. And you also wanna ask yourself like, do I wanna follow because I need more of this particular thing in my workouts? Mobility for example or flexibility or powerlifting. Maybe those are things that you know you should incorporate and you work out with someone that's good at those things. So you're just like, I'm just gonna follow your workout. Yeah, have you guys, can you think of times where you actually, obviously you guys naturally want to lead the workout. So how often have you found yourself wanting to follow someone's workout? I've worked with people who helped me with flexibility but it was a flexibility workout. So it wasn't strength training. So we'd show up and then I'd let them lead me through yoga or flexibility and it worked out really well for me because I'm not gonna lead that and I'm probably not gonna do it. Yeah, when I was first learning kettlebells, I worked with some of my friends who were very proficient in them. And so I would let them sort of take me through what a workout would consist of if I just used that one tool and really worked on the technique of everything. But honestly, like once I got like one session, I was like, okay, I'm gonna go work on all this myself. That's just how I am, but I definitely appreciate when somebody has a really good skill set that I could learn something from. I look at that as like an opportunity, but in terms of like having to have somebody kind of lead me and guide me through the whole process of getting better at it, no thanks. Yeah, no, those are the only times I can think about where I didn't want to lead the workout where it's just purely, I actually am curious and I want to learn from this version, right? So I mean, I've had the opportunity to work out with Ben Pacolski, Paul Check, like we've had some people like that that I've had the opportunity to lift with. And when I'm with someone like that who I have a lot of respect for their knowledge, their experience, that's about the only time where I'll be like, oh, you know what, I'll take it back, see it on what I think I want to do today. Let's just see where he takes me and see what he's into because I might pick something out that I like. And every time I've done that with someone like that, I feel like I get something. Like Mike Salemi, like I did a few like unconventional stuff with him with Bulgarian bags or with kettlebells. And it was, it was enlightening, you know, to see like at that high level of technique, what you could incorporate and work out. Yeah, when I was younger, I had a few, not workout partners, but workouts with people that I follow. There was the story I've told about the power lifters. That was great. I was a young kid, had no idea what the hell I was doing. And I was just so happy that these guys were allowing me to follow their workout. I worked out with a bodybuilder one time. Again, as a kid, I think it was 18 or 19. And that was super awesome because I just followed his work. It was way inappropriate for me. It was way too much volume. But I learned things. I learned some stuff. I learned through certain exercises. I learned how to connect to certain muscles and squeeze. And so that was really fun. So I can see the value in it. It's just that this is my profession. Same thing with you guys. So we're probably, we're definitely biased towards the lead side than we would be towards the fall side. Well, I also think this matters where you're at in your journey too. The next point that you bring up is talking about the connection in the workout or the potential workout partner. There could be a time in my life, and there's definitely been this where I'm working out, like we just came out of this not that long ago where I was working out quite a bit with Katrina. And it was really more about the experience with her and my son and lifting. I actually had no routine at all. It was like, whatever she was doing, I would move the bar, whatever, like if it was a weight movement, really. Yeah, if she was squatting, maybe I could overhead press that weight. And so I would be overhead pressing and then she'd get the suspension trainer out. Okay, now I'm doing suspension trainer stuff and then taking breaks, playing with Max at his table and his Play-Doh and like, so I think it's important that I know that I rail on the, oh, I don't wanna work out partner. Yeah, when I'm on my specific kick and I'm trying to hit goals and I'm so, but then there's times when the connection, or a bond with a friend where I just, it's more about that communication and meeting with someone, choosing to do something healthy and growth-minded and good for us for an hour and a half with a friend who gives a shit what we're doing for the day. Every year after Thanksgiving, I do this with all my friends. Right, that's a great example. And it's not about the workout. Yeah, we're not trying to progress or... No, but it's about connecting with them. And you gotta ask yourself, do I wanna work out with this partner? Because I wanna spend time with them when we're doing something that's pretty healthy. This is where I think couples get mixed up because usually one person in the relationship wants that and the other person wants the workout. So it's like, the wife or the husband's like, yeah, I get to hang out with my significant other and the other person's like, yeah, we get to work out. And then you kinda get that budding of head. So you have to ask yourself, am I here for the workout or is it the connection with the partner? There's no wrong answer here. There isn't, but it's important to distinguish the difference because if one of the things that you're frustrated with or challenged with is you're not progressing and you're not seeing results, well, it could be because you're so focused on the connection going to the workout and catching up with your girlfriend or your friend and talking, which there's nothing wrong with that if that's your desired outcome. But if you're also struggling with progressing because maybe your programming sucks because you guys go there with just like, I know I'm not making major gains in those workouts with my son and my wife. But it's not about that for that time. So I'm not allowing those to compile three weeks in a row and then going like, why am I not seeing results? Why is my bench down or why am I not leaner? You know, it's like, I'm not even thinking about that right now. But if you are thinking about that, and then you're also working out for the connection's purpose, it's important that you understand the difference there because that could be a problem. Now I'll tell you what, managing gyms, I saw lots and lots of consistent, consistent meaning like three, four days a week, same time every week for years of workout partners that were there for the connection. And it was wonderful because they would show up, they'd meet each other, you could tell they'd have a good time. And then they'd always have like a scheduled lunch or something afterwards. And you could tell, I'd talk to them and you could see in the workouts, like it wasn't super hardcore, but they were still exercising, but they'd meet up and it's, oh, I get to see my friend and afterwards we grab coffee. And it's great. I think this is wonderful for the average person. Like the average person is not a fitness fanatic, right? That's just so in love with fitness that it's all about the workout. Like for me, that's what workouts are all about. But a lot of people are just, they struggle with being consistent. The workout is good because it improves the quality of life, not necessarily because they love the workout itself. So then they find this workout partner that's a good friend of theirs. They like to meet up three days a week at whatever time, six AM, they do their workout to get coffee together then they go to work or whatever. Or they work out, you know, they put the kids to bed and they meet up. And I knew a few women like this, they would meet up and they were friends and they'd hang out and it kept them super consistent. And sure, the workouts weren't like all super hardcore, but they maintained good health because- They're playing the long game, right? It's a lifestyle at that point. That's it. So there's totally nothing wrong with it. No, I mean, and there's all kinds of different ways you can construct this. But I've seen the same thing in the gym where it just became a thing. Like it's an activity that's a consistent thing that they go see their friend instead of them meeting up at a bar or, you know, doing these other extracurricular things that maybe are not as healthy of an option. They've decided to meet up at the gym and then make an experience around that. So, you know, there's no knocking it. And it's, you know, in terms of having a partner and a workout partner, it's just really like sometimes you do need to dial it in. And so what that looks like, you know, you got to kind of assess if it's moving the needle for you or not. Yeah, I'm never working out, almost never working out for the connection with a workout partner. For me, it's always about the workout. My dad, the longest, most consistent he ever was with working out was because he worked out with his friend. His friend ended up moving and then he stopped working out. But they, for years, I managed a club up in Sunnyvale. My dad, and he would drive all the way up to Sunnyvale because that's where I worked. So he got to see me. So my dad would drive all the way up with his friend. They'd come in and I'd watch them work out and they did some exercises and they did some stuff. But you could tell it was because they were hanging out with each other. They were childhood friends. And then they'd go afterwards and grab some food at the restaurant, you know, next door or whatever. And it was great because it kept them super consistent. For me, never, because I'm here for the workout. If I want to hang out with someone to connect, it's not going to be in the gym. I'm going to go out with you somewhere else. Go for a walk. Yeah, we'll do something else. But you have to be honest with yourself, in other words, because what you don't want to do is find a workout partner that's there to hang out with you while you're there to work out. Now you're not, now you're going to have a crappy. Well, yeah, you're there to make change. Right? I think that's the important thing to note is that I think there's nothing wrong with it. If you're completely content and happy, and this just helps you stay consistent with quote-unquote working out. But if you're trying to make progress or change and that you're lagging or you're not seeing the change you want, well, you have to evaluate this. It'll feel frustrating if you're there and you're real serious and your friend just wants to hang out, very, very frustrating, right? The next one, here's another one, is do you have similar goals or different goals? By the way, there is no right answer here. Some people would say you have to have the same goals. No, not necessarily. Sometimes it's good to work out with someone whose goals compliment yours. Like if I worked out, for example, with Justin, it would be very complimentary in some ways because he does stuff that I don't do and I do stuff that he doesn't do. And if we worked out together and let's just say everything else matched, then it would work out really well. On the flip side, maybe you don't have no desire to try different things. You have no desire to work on weaknesses or imbalances or whatever. You're there to do your workout and you want to work out with someone who's also there to do the same thing as you, in which case that's the person that you want to pick. But you have to figure this out for yourself. Yeah, this one's challenging because I can see pros and cons to both. Totally. I can see pros and cons to similar goals. I can see pros and cons to different goals. The obvious, right, with similar goals, you're training the same type of probably frequency and muscle group split or body part, like whatever you're doing, probably can align pretty well. Problem with similar goals is when you have similar goals and it's easier to get into that competitive mindset when you're lifting. And maybe Sal and I are workout partners, we are on this body sculpting goal or following maps of aesthetics so we're doing the exact same thing. I got terrible sleep last night and he got phenomenal sleep last night and feels completely rejuvenated and ready to smash the weights. Real easily, we have the same goals, we're following the same program. Real easily for me to fall in the trap of like, I'm just gonna stick with what you're doing today because of that, because we have everything so similar. But me knowing better, like, okay, this is a day when I should scale back a little bit on the intensity because I got terrible sleep last night, I'm not well fed, whatever the case may be. So yeah, I can see the pros and cons to both and I think it's important to know the difference. Totally. Now let's talk about when you know or how to know when it's time to break up with the workout part. You know what's funny about this? I've gotten DMs on this. You sit up to the wrong address. I laugh at this one too because I somewhat was behind the influence of my wife actually breaking up with her workout partner. Oh, I remember when you went through this. Yeah, and it was awkward. Actually, I mean, there was a lot more there like in terms of their friendship that sort of it exposed. And so it just sort of, they just naturally kind of broke off. But yeah, it was really hard for her to do that because there was a lot of time vested and they both were consistent together, but it just was not doing anything well for her body. It's stressful. I've gotten messages from people. How do I tell my workout partner not to work out with them? I've had people tell me that they changed gyms because they didn't work out with a workout partner, but they wanted to work out at the same time. So they didn't want to show up, see the workout partner and then, huh, I'll be over here and it'll be over there. She's cheating on them. That's the easiest path. And I've also had people say that. She'd show up with a different workout partner. You've been getting a pump without me? Yeah, totally. But here's some signs that you want to look out for that'll tell you, it's probably time to break up with your workout partner. Number one, your workouts are unproductive. You know, this is why all the workout partners I've worked out with, even the ones that were good eventually ended. And I'm very blunt by the way, I'll tell a workout partner and I've done this. I've said this to people and I've said, hey. You're weak. I'll tell them, it's not working for me anymore. I want to work out on my own. And it's because eventually what happened is the workouts started to deteriorate and it just started to become mad as productive. And for me, it's a very serious thing. And when that starts to happen, I'm like out of here. So if you're doing your workouts and you're finding they're just not productive, you're just showing up and it's like, why am I even doing this? Like that's, that's time. And sometimes your goals don't align. And, you know, sometimes you start noticing like nagging pains and achiness. That's another one now. That I think you start kind of evaluating these things and you start seeing the patterns of what you keep doing and what that's leading towards. And so I think that was where it was obvious. You know, just speaking on behalf of my wife, like it's like, this is not benefiting my body like it should be. Yeah, the next one is you just started, you said nagging pains and stuff is you start getting injured a lot. I had a workout partner break up with me over this. It was the same person I told you about earlier with the shitty form. He eventually, and it was like, when he said this to me on my own. That guy with shitty form broke up with you? Yeah, I know. You're like, I tried to warn you. That had to be a tough one for you that day. Oh, the irony was. Tough one. The irony was hilarious. You're breaking up with me? Yeah. You in your shitty form? Yeah. I'll break up with you first. Yeah, I can just see Suckin' Elevator. No, actually I was like. You don't break up with me. I break up with you. Yeah. The irony of it was so hilarious because I remember he comes in. He's like, hey, this will be our last workout. He goes, you know, I just keep hurting myself and stuff. And I remember like, look at him like with shock. Like, yeah, bro, how many times am I going to tell you? You're using too much weight and you have shitty form. But he's like, yeah, I keep getting hurt. So I got to change my workouts and the workout. I remember being like so happy. Like, cool, you said it before. You made it easy. Yeah. But I mean, if you find yourself getting hurt quite a bit because you're following a workout or you're working out with a workout partner that's just not smart or pushing you when you shouldn't. Like, have you ever done this? I hate this. This is a noisy shit out of me. You're doing a set and you've got you're working out with a workout partner. And you want to stop the set because, you know, this is about as hard as I want to go. No, man, you got two more. Come on. You got two more. Shut your mouth, dude. I'm not doing two more. I'm done with my set. The workouts I'm productive and they're getting injured, both I think happen a lot to people that measure like their workouts by how much they enjoy them or like them. So I think of like people that love class settings with their friends that like they love it. They go there. It's fun. They sweat. They feel like they got a hard workout, but it's the same shit every single every single time they come in over and over and over there. And the results stall and or chronic pain sinks him. Yeah. And it's hard to get them to see past the. But I love it. I meet my girl from there every week or every day and we go there and we have such a great workout. And then we go have, you know, lunch afterwards and they're so attached to the connection part and the consistency and the fun part. But then that same time, then they're expressing, I'm so frustrated though, because I've this last 15 pounds. I can't seem to lose it. And my knees are bothering me and my hips are bothering me. And it's just like, yeah, it's because you've attached so much value to the connection fun part of the workout. Yet you're saying that you want these results. And part of the problem is you're doing the same repetitive shit over. Yeah. Yeah. The last two sort of the ones that's like the inconsistency, the showing up late part like, oh, that's what actually led to some of the breakups I had with Jim partners. Because it's like, I'm here. I'm like, I don't want to sit here and like, you know, wait for you when I could be productive and do my own thing. Like, where are you? Like, it's just like, I don't need to be your generation of motivation. You know, like, I don't need to be that guy for you. Yeah. No, being late or not showing up, you get this. So I've always been like this with workout partners. You get one shot. I don't not like one strike, like one time. You don't show up or one time you're late and I'm not working out with you. And I was notorious for this. I would have a workout partner show up 10 minutes late. I'm already on the second exercise. Oh, you don't wait for me. No, man, go do your workout. I'm in this. I'm in this right now. So that's just me. So and if you're a consistent person and you're very serious about your workouts, having a workout partner that shows up late or is inconsistent or no shows you, that's that's not good. You you got to you got to cut that off. I think that's a big deal and everybody's different in their tolerance for me. It was zero. You get zero opportunities the second you're late or the second you don't show up like we're not going to remember if I had anybody like that. I don't know if I had somebody that was showing up late. And if I did, I'm sure I don't remember. You probably just started. Yeah, that's exactly what I would do. I'm not the type of guy who would sit around and be like, Oh, give him five more minutes. We said we started 12. I'm starting at 12. You know, say he can find me. So yeah, I don't remember that one. I do remember the last point that you have is the drama one. And that was what I said earlier and and I didn't I really didn't make this. I just assumed this was just part of it. Like you have rest breaks, you have conversation, whatever's on your guys's mind. You talk about and a lot of people like to talk about drama and other people and shit. And it's just like that was pretty ruins a workout. It does now today. Like because I see it and I really I and I think I treat my workouts different, but I probably allowed that to creep in a lot more, which didn't. I didn't realize that the compounding effects of that of just being distracted like that, the negativity to forget just the workout and the results, just the positive mindset and the framework of your day and the way you go about things taking in a bunch of negative energy like that. I just I believe that's a terrible way to kick off a day or finish a work. Yeah. And this is again, this is an individual thing because I can remember there were two there's two of these two women I remember specifically when we talked earlier about connection. There's these two women that used to work out and it was every morning and they would drop their kids off at school. Then they'd come work out, then they'd get breakfast together. And it was like a four or five day a week thing, I think. And I would say hi to them. Hey, what's up ladies? And they do their thing. And for them, because it was a connection thing, they would spend five minutes in between sets talking about their lives. And it wasn't drama to them. They loved it because they were there to connect. So this you have to kind of determine for yourself. For me, any conversation, you know, longer than 15 seconds in between sets is too much drama. Like, I don't care, I don't want to hear about anything right now. I just want to just be in my zone. Right. So you have to kind of determine this for yourself with your workouts is, you know, is this drama like, am I getting stressed out or angry or upset or off focus? And that's different from person to person. For you, drama may be that you're there to connect with someone and they're just quiet. And you might be like, hey, I want to work out with someone that's more talkative and fun. This person's boring. Like someone who's there to connect would find me very boring. They would not like to work out with me because I'm not going to talk. Well, you know, it's interesting about the workout. It reminds me of like the different types of clients you would get as a coach. Right. And what they're looking for from the workout. And like you try to kind of be a chameleon in terms of like, I need to ramp up my energy for this person because they obviously need a push and they need like, you know, some added a bit of energy in this. And then some of them you've got to like really like kind of calm it down, calm down and, you know, get them to really like focus on the rest periods. And, you know, so it's interesting to kind of all of these apply basically even when you're going to look for a coach. Oh, 100%. So true. All right. So here's some reasons why it may be good to not have a workout partner. Why it might be a good idea to work out on your own. One is you get to follow your own workout and your own schedule. It's it's as individualized as it gets when you're by yourself, right? You don't have to consider anyone else. You don't have to consider anybody's feelings or form or technique. You don't have to adjust the seat on the exercise machine. You don't have to add the weight or take weight off. You're not spotting anybody. You are 100% individualized workout. For me, this is why I've worked out 90% of time on my own. I think it's a pretty good value. Now, some people, this is well worth the trade to work out with their favorite person and I totally get that. But for other people, this is going to be a huge plus. Yeah. You know, I'm I'm going to take it even further. And I believe this is the ultimate place to reach. I know you just defended somebody who would willing to trade those things off because they really, really, and I'm not by no means judging someone who likes to work out with their workout partner and that works for them. But I really believe the ultimate place to get is to apply. Like we talk about intuitive eating and intuitive training, how that's like kind of the pinnacle of eating. That's the pinnacle of training to where you just know what when you go to that gym, you know what's best for your body at that time and you do a really good job of addressing it. I just don't think that's possible with another person. I think you can get really good at it and you could have the partner, your fist bump and you do your headphones and this and that. But I think you'll never reach the same level as you would learning to do this on your own and learning your body and not having any distractions of any workout partner. That's just my opinion that I think that that. I agree with that. The only problem with that, but I do agree. But I think the only problem with that is that we have to be careful because I mean, look, we've all worked in the space for a long time. We can't, we know this. Not everybody's going to be a fitness fanatic. Most people are not. Most people do it. And that's fine because that and you may be your entire life. You do rely on having a partner and I'm not judging that person that does that. What I'm saying is that I think the pinnacle. And that may that person, there's a lot of people that will work out and never reach the pinnacle of and they have no desire. Yeah, right. Exactly. So and they don't have a desire to and there's and I'm not judging that person and there's nothing wrong with that. But I truly believe if you're somebody who is seeking like the ultimate like level of being able to train and diets with that, it is being able to do this intuitively on your own without anybody external motivation or discipline to get you there. Just you and yourself, the ability to listen to your body, to know what's best for you, to be able to complete sets when you need to, to pull back when you know you need to pull back like to push. Yeah. And I think that's what happens when somebody does it long enough. And then they reach the level of a really have a passion for fitness. That's usually where they end up, right? But a lot of people, what I don't want to do is discourage people because they're like, oh, well, I don't care about that. There's different phases, man. And if you're at that phase of more power to you and utilize that, it's a tool, right? Yeah. I just want people to be consistent, you know? Yeah. A workout partner can absolutely be a tool and be tremendously helpful for you. My point is that I think if you're continually you want to progress beyond that the ultimate place to reach is to be able to intuitively do it by yourself. Another reason is this, you don't have to wait for anybody or depend on anybody. But this also could be a positive for working out with a training partner because maybe the fact that somebody depends on you is what keeps you more consistent. Maybe you like that. Maybe you like the fact that you have somebody that's doing this with you. For me, I don't like that because, again, I'm a fitness fanatic. All three of us are. I don't want it to be to wait for anybody. I don't want to sit and know we're going to meet at this time and here's what's going to happen. It's just me. It's just me. I'm going to do my thing. But again, for some people, it's the opposite. And it's actually a detriment. And for them, it makes them more consistent knowing, oh, John, he needs me. He needs me today to show up to work out. And this is what we're going to do together. Here's another one. And this, for me, is a big deal. And we mentioned earlier, if you want a meditative workout, you can't do that with someone else. I can't be, again, we're all like this. We've all worked out at the same time, probably 50 times. We've only worked out together, together, like less than five times. When we work out at the same time, we're all meditative in our own space. And we're in different corners of the gym. Different corners of the gym. No one's talking to each other. You may as well. We don't say a single word to each other, right? If anything, it's like I may talk shit to you for two seconds across the gym. And that's, I have to catch you with your headphones off and mine are off. And that almost never happens. Well, does that count? I mean, if you get to that level where you know yourself so well and you're working out with one of your friends, but you guys split off, but you just make it a scheduled appointment where you both come in. Sure, I guess. And so, I mean, I think there's a way that you could probably evolve into that, but you really do need to put in a lot of work on yourself in knowing your body signals and knowing how you feel for that day. I actually think that's, I thought that was the kind of final progression before I ended up being just myself, was I did that for quite some time. You just showed up together. I actually did that when I was competing. I had other competitors that were competing in shows that I was in and so like that. Because I like being around other people and what I'm doing for sure. And it was like an accountability piece. Hey, what time are you going to the gym tomorrow? Like, I'll be there at noon. Cool, I'll be there at noon also. And would you guys meet up and eat or something afterwards? Yeah, we eat afterwards, but we would not train together or maybe we'd meet and we'd be walking on the treadmill afterwards. That's not bad. Like having an appointment after the workout together, right? That might be a good accountability. Right, so I did like utilizing that as like an accountability piece to go there. And a motivational piece. I know somebody else who's pushing for a same show as I'm going to is there. But I had already reached a place in my life or in training where I knew that like, I knew what's best for my body. He doesn't know that. We're to have different bodies. We shouldn't be working out together, especially at this level, what we're doing. So we would just meet there for accountability, train, walk treadmills afterwards, and then we'd go eat at this place that was right across the street. So that I see, I think, and I really think that that's like, you're right there. You're pretty much training by yourself. You're not really, you know, you're meeting someone at the gym, but you guys aren't getting distracted. You're not spotting each other. You ain't doing none of that shit. Again, that being said, I've known quite a few people, not a majority. The majority of the people that I know that I've worked out very consistently end up working out alone. But there's a sizable minority, let's say 15% of the people, 20%, that I know who worked out consistently, who've worked out with a workout partner consistently for long periods of time. But it's really hard to find someone that matches all those things. Here's some advice. When you're agreeing to work out with someone, don't do it haphazardly. In other words, don't be like, yeah, let's meet up on Mondays and Wednesdays and work out together. And because then you'll end up in the situation where it's like, okay, now I got to break up with this person and it could be awkward. What do you say to them? What if they still show up at the same time? Do you guys just like, do your own thing? Like it's really weird, we got to change gyms. So here's a piece of advice. Lay out your expectations before you start. Hey, you know, I was thinking about working out with a workout partner. Is this something you'd be up for? Yeah, well, here's the times. Here's what I'm looking for. And here's what I'll do and I'll stop if these things aren't meant. Don't take a personal. This is just how I work out. This is how I've, the last few training partners, how I started those workouts. I say, hey, you want to work out together? Yes. Here's the deal. If you show up late once, I'm getting started and I probably won't work out with you anymore after that. I'm very quiet in my zone when I work out. I'm not following it. It's not like an asshole, but I would set the expectations so that if the one of those things didn't happen afterwards, it wasn't this awkward like, this is the main reason why we don't work out with Sal because he came with this long, non-negotiable, we had a sign that I was just like, this is way too much commitment for me, bro. I just wanted to get a lift with you this morning. Fuck it, I work out with myself. That's totally not true. Look, if you like our information, head over to mindpumpfree.com and check out our guides. We have guides that can help you with almost any health or fitness goal. You can also find us all on social media. So Justin is on Instagram at Mind Pump Justin. Adam is on Instagram at Mind Pump Adam, and you can find me on Twitter at Mind Pump Sal.