 9. Your real devastating row has many points of resemblance with a prairie fire. A man on a prairie lights his pipe and throws away the match. The flame catches a bunch of dry grass, and before anyone can realize what is happening, sheets of fire are racing over the country, and the interested neighbors are following their example. I have already compared a row with a thunderstorm, but both comparisons may stand. In dealing with Sylvester matter as a row, there must be no stint. The tomato which hit Wyatt in the face was the thrown away match. But for the unerring aim of the town marksman, great events would never have happened. A tomato is a trivial thing, though it is possible that the man whom it hits may not think so. But in the present case, it was the direct cause of epic making trouble. The tomato hit Wyatt. Wyatt, with others, went to look for the thrower. The remnants of the thrower's friends were placed in the pond, and with them, as they say in the courts of law, police constable Alfred Butt. Following the chain of events, we find Mr. Butt having prudently changed his clothes, calling upon the headmaster. The headmaster was grave and sympathetic. Mr. Butt, fierce and revengeful. The imagination of the force is proverbial. Nurtured on motor cars and fed with stopwatches, it has become world famous. Mr. Butt gave free reign to it. Threw me in, they did. They did, sir. Yes, sir. Threw you in. Yes, sir. Plop, said Mr. Butt with a certain sad relish. Really, really, said the headmaster. Indeed, this is dear me. I shall certainly, they threw you in. Yes, I shall certainly. Encouraged by this appreciative reception of his story, Mr. Butt started it again, right from the beginning. I was on my beat, sir, and I thought I heard a disturbance. I says to myself, hello, I says, a fracas. Lots of them all gathered together and fighting, I says, beginning to suspect something. What's all this about, I wonder, I says. Blow me if I don't think it's a fracas. And concluded Mr. Butt with the air of one confiding a secret, and it was a fracas. And these boys actually threw you into the pond. Plop, sir. Mrs. Butt is drying my uniform at home at this very moment as we sit talking here, sir. She says to me, why, whatever you've been doing, you're all wet. And he added again with the confidential air, I was wet, too, ring and wet. The headmaster's frown deepened. And you are certain that your assailants were boys from the school? Sure as I am that I'm sitting here, sir. They all add their caps on their heads, sir. I have never heard of such a thing. I can hardly believe that it is possible. They actually seized you and threw you into the water. Splish, sir, said the policeman with a vividness of imagery, both surprising and gratifying. The headmaster tapped restlessly on the floor with his foot. How many boys were there? He asked. Couple of hundred, sir, said Mr. Butt promptly. Two hundred. It was dark, sir, and I couldn't see, not to say property. But if you ask me, Frank, in private opinion, I should say couple of hundred. Hmm. Well, I will look into the matter at once. They shall be punished. Yes, sir. Yes. Hmm. Yes. Most severely. Yes, sir. Yes. Thank you, Constable. Good night. Good night, sir. The headmaster of Rickon was not a motorist. Owing to this disadvantage, he made a mistake. Had he been a motorist, he would have known that statements by the police in the matter of figures must be divided by any number from two to ten, according to discretion. As it was, he accepted Constable Butt's report almost as it stood. He thought that he might possibly have been mistaken as to the exact numbers of those concerned in his immersion, but he accepted the statement in so far as it indicated that the thing had been the work of a considerable section of the school and not of only one or two individuals. And this made all the difference to his method of dealing with the affair. Had he known how few were the numbers of those responsible for the cold in the head which subsequently attacked Constable Butt, he would have asked for their names and an extra lesson would have settled the entire matter. As it was, however, he got the impression that the school as a whole was culpable, and he proceeded to punish the school as a whole. It happened that about a week before the pond episode, a certain member of the royal family had recovered from a dangerous illness which at one time had looked like being fatal. No official holiday had been given to the schools in honor of the recovery, but Eaton and Harrow had set the example which was followed throughout the kingdom, and Rickon had come into line with the rest. Only two days before the O.W.'s matches, the headmaster had given out a notice in the hall that the following Friday would be a whole holiday and the school, always ready to stop work, had approved of the announcement exceedingly. The step which the headmaster decided to take by way of avenging Mr. Butt's wrongs was to stop this holiday. He gave out a notice to that effect on the Monday. The school was thunderstruck. It could not understand it. The pond affair had, of course, become public property, and those who had had nothing to do with it had been much amused. There will be a frightful row about it, they had said, thrilled with the pleasant excitement of those who see trouble approaching and themselves looking on from a comfortable distance without risk or uneasiness. They were not malicious. They did not want to see their friends in difficulties, but there is no denying that a row does break the monotony of a school term. The thrilling feeling that something is going to happen is the salt of life, and here they were right in it, after all. The blow had fallen and crushed guilty and innocent alike. The school's attitude can be summed up in three words. It was one vast blank astounded, here I say. Everybody was saying it, though not always in those words. When condensed, everybody's comment on the situation came to that. There is something rather pathetic in the indignation of a school. It must always or nearly always expend itself in words and in private at that. Even the consolation of getting onto platforms and shouting at itself is denied to it. A public school has no hide park. There is every probability, in fact it is certain, that but for one male content the school's indignation would have been allowed to simmer down in the usual way, and finally become a mere vague memory. The male content was Wyatt. He had been responsible for the starting of the matter, and he proceeded now to carry it on till it blazed up into the biggest thing of its kind ever known at Ricken, the great picnic. Anyone who knows the public schools, their iron bound conservatism, and as a whole intense respect for order and authority, will appreciate the magnitude of his feet, even though he may not approve of it. Leaders of men are rare. Leaders of boys are almost unknown. It requires genius to sway a school. It would be an absorbing task for a psychologist to trace the various stages by which an impossibility was changed into a reality. Wyatt's coolness and matter of fact determination were his chief weapons. His popularity and reputation for lawlessness helped him. A conversation which he had with Neville Smith, a day boy, is typical of the way in which he forced his point of view on the school. Neville Smith was thoroughly representative of the average Rikinian. He could play his part in any minor rag which interested him, and probably considered himself on the whole a daring sort of person. But at heart he had an enormous respect for authority. Before he came to Wyatt he would not have dreamed of proceeding beyond words in his revolt. Wyatt acted on him like some drug. Neville Smith came upon Wyatt on his way to the Nets. The notice concerning the holiday had only been given out that morning, and he was full of it. He expressed his opinion of the headmaster freely and in well-chosen words. He said it was a swindle, that it was all rot, and that it was a beastly shame. He added that something ought to be done about it. What are you going to do? Asked Wyatt. Well, said Neville Smith a little awkwardly, guiltily conscious that he had been frothing and senting sarcasm. I don't suppose one can actually do anything. Why not? Said Wyatt. What do you mean? Why don't you take the holiday? What? Not turn up on Friday? Yes, I'm not going to. Neville Smith stopped and stared. Wyatt was unmoved. You're what? I simply shan't go to school. You're rotting. All right. No, but I say, ragging bard, are you just going to cut off though the holiday has been stopped? That's the idea. You'll get sacked. I suppose so, but only because I shall be the only one to do it. If the whole school took Friday off they couldn't do much. They couldn't sack the school. I jove nor could they, I say. They walked on Neville Smith's mind in a whirl. Wyatt whistling. I say, said Neville Smith after a pause. It would be a bit of a rag. Not bad. Do you think the chaps would do it? If they understood they wouldn't be alone. Another pause. Shall I ask some of them, said Neville Smith? Do. I could get quite a lot, I believe. That would be a start, wouldn't it? I could get a couple of dozen from Wayne's. We should be 40 or 50 strong to start with. I say, what a score, wouldn't it be? Yes. I'll speak to the chaps tonight and let you know. All right, said Wyatt, tell them that I should be going anyhow. I should be glad of a little company. The school turned in on the Thursday night in a restless, excited way. There were mysterious whisperings and giggling. Groups kept forming in corners apart to disperse casually and innocently on the approach of some person and authority. An air of expectancy permeated each of the houses. Chapter 10 The Great Picnic. Morning school at Rickon started at nine o'clock. At that hour there was a call over in each of the form rooms. After call over the forms proceeded to the Great Hall for prayers. A strangely desolate feeling was in the air at nine o'clock on the Friday morning. Sit in the grounds of a public school any afternoon and summer holidays and you will get exactly the same sensation of being alone in the world as came to the dozen or so dayboys who bicycled through the gates that morning. Rickon was a boarding school for the most part, but it had its eleven of dayboys. The majority of these lived in the town and walked to school. A few, however, whose homes were farther away came on bicycles. One plutocrat did the journey in a motor car rather to the scandal of the authorities who, though unable to interfere, looked to scant when compelled by the warning toot of the horn to skip from road to pavement. A form master has the strongest objection to being made to skip like a young ram by a boy to whom he has only the day before given a hundred lines for shuffling his feet in form. It seemed curious to these cyclists that there should be nobody about. Punctuality is the politeness of princes, but it was not a leading characteristic of the school, and at three minutes to nine as a general rule you might see the gravel in front of the buildings freely dotted with sprinters trying to get in in time to answer their names. It was curious that there should be nobody about today. A wave of reform could scarcely have swept through the houses during the night, and yet where was everybody? Time only deepened the mystery. The form rooms, like the gravel, were empty. The cyclists looked at one another in astonishment. What could it mean? It was an occasion on which sane people wonder if their brains are not playing them some unaccountable trick. I say, said Willoughby of the Lower Fifth to Brown, the only other occupant of the form room. The old man did stop the holiday today, didn't he? Just what I was going to ask you, said Brown. It's jolly rum. I distinctly remember him giving it out in hall that it was going to be stopped because of the old W's Day row. So do I. I can't make it out. Where is everybody? They can't all be late. Somebody would have turned up by now. Why, it's just striking. Perhaps he sent another notice around the houses late last night saying it was on again all right. I say, what a swindle if he did. Someone might have let us know. I should have got up an hour later. So should I. Hello, here is somebody. It was the master of the Lower Fifth, Mr. Spence. He walked briskly into the room as was his habit. Seeing the obvious void, he stopped in his stride and looked puzzled. Willoughby, Brown, are you the only two here? Where is everybody? Please, sir, we don't know. We were just wondering. Have you seen nobody? No, sir. We were just wondering, sir, if the holiday had been put on again after all. I've heard nothing about it. I should have received some sort of intimation if it had been. Yes, sir. Do you mean to say that you have seen nobody, Brown? Only about a dozen fellows, sir. The usual lot who come on bikes, sir. None of the borders. No, sir, not a single one. This is extraordinary. Mr. Spence pondered. Well, he said you two fellows had better go along up to Hall. I shall go to the common room and make inquiries. Perhaps as you say there is a holiday today and the notice was not brought to me. Mr. Spence told himself as he walked to the common room that this might be a possible solution of the difficulty. He was not a house master and lived by himself in rooms in the town. It was just conceivable that they might have forgotten to tell him of the change in the arrangements. But in the common room the same perplexity reigned. Half a dozen masters were seated around the room and a few more were standing and they were all very puzzled. A brisk conversation was going on. Several voices hailed Mr. Spence as he entered. Hello, Spence. Are you alone in the world too? Any of your boys turned up, Spence? You in the same condition as we are, Spence? Mr. Spence seated himself on the table. Haven't any of your fellows turned up either? He said. When I accepted the honorable post of lower fourth master in this abode of sin, said Mr. Seymour, it was on the distinct understanding that there was going to be a lower fourth. Yet I go into my form room this morning and what do I find? Simply emptiness and Pickersgill II whistling the church parade all flat. I consider I have been hardly treated. I have no complaint to make against Brown and Willoughby as individuals, said Mr. Spence, but considered as a form I call them a short measure. I confess that I am entirely at a loss, said Mr. Shields precisely. I have never been confronted with a situation like this since I became a school master. It is most mysterious, agreed Mr. Wayne, plucking at his beard exceedingly so. The younger masters, notably Mr. Spence and Mr. Seymour, had begun to look on the thing as a huge jest. We had better teach ourselves, said Mr. Seymour. Spence, do a hundred lines for laughing in form. The door burst open. Hello, here's another scholastic little bow-peep, said Mr. Seymour. Well, Applebee, have you lost your sheep, too? You don't mean to tell me, began Mr. Applebee. I do, said Mr. Seymour. Here we are, fifteen of us, all good men and true graduates of our universities. And as far as I can see, if we divide up the boys who have come to school this morning on fair share and share alike lines, it will work out at about two-thirds of a boy each. Spence, will you take a third of Picker's Guild a second? I want none of your charity, said Mr. Spence loftily. You don't seem to realize that I'm the best off of you all. I've got two in my form. It's no good offering me your Picker's Guilds. I simply haven't room for them. What does it all mean, exclaimed Mr. Applebee? If you ask me, said Mr. Seymour, I should say that it meant that the school, holding the sensible view that first thoughts are best, have ignored the head's change of mind and are taking their holiday as per original program. They surely cannot. Well, where are they then? Do you seriously mean that the entire school has, has rebelled? Naysire, quoted Mr. Spence, a revolution. I never heard of such a thing. We're making history, said Mr. Seymour. It will be rather interesting, said Mr. Spence, to see how the head will deal with a situation like this. One can rely on him to do the statesman-like thing, but I'm bound to say I shouldn't care to be in his place. It seems to me these boys hold all the cards. You can't expel a whole school. There's safety in numbers. The thing is colossal. It is deplorable, said Mr. Wayne with austerity, exceedingly so. I try to think so, said Mr. Spence, but it's a struggle. There's a Napoleonic touch about the business that appeals to one. Disorder on a small scale is bad, but this is immense. I've never heard of anything like it in any public school. When I was at Winchester, my last year there, there was pretty nearly a revolution because the captain of Cricket was expelled on the eve of the Eden match. I remember making inflammatory speeches myself on that occasion, but we stopped on the right side of the line. We were satisfied with growling, but this, Mr. Seymour got up. It's an ill wind, he said. With any luck, we ought to get the day off and it's ideal weather for a holiday. The head can hardly ask us to sit indoors teaching nobody. If I have to stew in my form room all day, instructing Pickersgill the second, I shall make things exceedingly sultry for that youth. He will wish that the Pickersgill progeny had stopped short at his elder brother. He will not value life. In the meantime, as it's already 10 past, hadn't we better be going up to Hall to see what the orders of the day are? Look at Shields, said Mr. Spence. He might be posing for a statue to be called Despair. He reminds me of McDuff, Macbeth Act 4, somewhere near the end. What, to all my pretty chickens at one fell swoop? That's what Shields is saying to himself. It's all very well to make a joke of it, Spence, said Mr. Shields, quirelessly. But it is most disturbing, most. Exceedingly, agreed Mr. Wayne. The bereaved company of masters walked on up the stairs that led to the Great Hall. Chapter 11. The Conclusion of the Picnic If the form rooms had been lonely, the Great Hall was doubly, trebly so. It was a vast room stretching from side to side of the middle block, and its ceilings soared up into a distant dome. At one end was a dais and an organ, and at intervals down the room stood long tables. The panels were covered with the names of Rikinians who had won scholarships at Oxford and Cambridge, and of old Rikinians who had taken first in mods or grates, or achieved any other recognized success, such as a place in the Indian Civil Service List. A silent testimony, these panels, to the work the school had done in the world. Nobody knew exactly how many the hall could hold when packed to its fullest capacity. The 600-odd boys at the school seemed to leave large gaps unfilled. This morning there was a mere handful, and the place looked worse than empty. The six form were there, and the school prefects. The Great Picnic had not affected their numbers. The sixth stood by their tables in a solid group. The other tables were occupied by ones and twos. A buzz of conversation was going on, which did not cease when the masters filed into the room and took their places. Everyone realized by this time that the biggest row in Rikin history was well underway, and the thing had to be discussed. In the master's library, Mr. Wayne and Mr. Shields, the spokesman of the common room, were breaking the news to the headmaster. The headmaster was a man who rarely betrayed emotion in his public capacity. He heard Mr. Shields' rambling remarks, punctuated by Mr. Wayne's exceedingly to an end. Then he gathered up his cap and gown. You say that the whole school is absent? He remarked quietly. Mr. Shields in a long-winded flow of words replied that that was what he did say. Ah, said the headmaster. There was a silence. Mmm, said the headmaster. There was another silence. Yes, said the headmaster. He then led the way into the hall. Conversation ceased abruptly as he entered. The school, like an audience at a theater when the hero has just appeared on the stage, felt that the serious interest of the drama had begun. There was a dead silence at every table as he strode up the room and onto the dais. There was something titanic in his calmness. Every eye was on his face as he passed up the hall, but not a sign of perturbation could the school read. To judge from his expression, he might have been unaware of the emptiness around him. The master who looked after the music of the school and incidentally accompanied the hymn with which prayers at Rickon opened was waiting, puzzled at the foot of the dais. It seemed improbable that things would go on as usual and he did not know whether he was expected to be at the organ or not. The headmaster's placid face reassured him. He went to his post. The hymn began. It was along him and one which the school liked for its swing and noise. As a rule when it was sung, the hall re-echoed. Today the thin sound of the voices had quite an uncanny effect. The organ boomed through the deserted room. The school or the remnants of it waited impatiently while the prefect, whose turn it was to read, stammered nervously through the lesson. They were anxious to get on to what the head was going to say at the end of prayers. At last it was over. The school waited all ears. The headmaster bent down from the dais and called to Furby Smith who was standing in his place with the sixth. The gazika, blushing warmly, stepped forward. Bring me a school list Furby Smith said the headmaster. The gazika was wearing a pair of very squeaky boots that morning. They sounded deafening as he walked out of the room. The school waited. Presently a distant squeaking was heard and Furby Smith returned bearing a large sheet of paper. The headmaster thanked him and spread it out on the reading desk. Then calmly as if it were an occurrence of every day he began to call the roll. Abney? No answer. Adams? No answer. Allenby? Here's sir from a table at the end of the room. Allenby was a prefect in the science sixth. The headmaster made a mark against his name with a pencil. Ark right? No answer. He began to call the names more rapidly. Arlington, Arthur, Ash, Aston. Here's sir in a shrill trouble from the rider in motor cars. The headmaster made another chick. The list came to an end after what seemed to the school an unconscionable time and he rolled up the paper again and stepped to the edge of the dais. All boys not in the sixth form, he said, will go to their form rooms and get their books and writing materials and return to the hall. Good work, murmured Mr. Seymour to himself looks as if we should get that holiday after all the sixth form will go to their form room as usual. I should like to speak to the masters for a moment. He nodded dismissal to the school. The masters collected on the dais. I find that I shall not require your services today, said the headmaster. If you will kindly set the boys in your form some work that will keep them occupied. I will look after them here. It is a lovely day. He added with a smile and I am sure you will all enjoy yourselves a great deal more in the open air. That said Mr. Seymour to Mr. Spence as they went downstairs is what I call a genuine sportsman. My opinion neatly expressed said Mr. Spence. Come on the river or shall we put up a net and have a knock river I think meet you at the boat house. All right, don't be long. If every day will run on these lines school mastering wouldn't be such a bad profession. I wonder if one could persuade one's form to run a muck is a regular thing. Pity one can't it seems to me the ideal state of things ensures the greatest happiness of the greatest number. I say suppose the school has gone up the river to and we meet them what shall we do. Thank them said Mr. Spence most kindly they've done us well. The school had not gone up the river. They had marched in a solid body with the school band at their head playing Suza in the direction of Warfield a market town of some importance distant about five miles of what they did and what the natives thought of it all no very distinct records remain. The thing is a tradition on the countryside now an event colossal and heroic to be talked about in the tap room of the village in during the long winter evenings. The papers got hold of it but were curiously misled as to the nature of the demonstration. This was the fault of the reporter and the staff of the Warfield intelligence sir and farmers guide who saw in the thing a legitimate march out and questioning a straggler as to the reason for the expedition and gathering foggily that the restoration to health of the imminent person was at the bottom of it said so in his paper and two days later at about the time when retribution had got seriously to work the Daily Mail reprinted the account with comments and elaborations and headed it loyal schoolboys. The writer said that great credit was due to the headmaster of ricken for his ingenuity and devising and organizing so novel of Thanksgiving celebration and there was the usual conversation between a rosy cheek glad of some sixteen summers and our representative in which the rosy cheek one spoke most kindly of the headmaster who seemed to be a warm personal friend of his. The remarkable thing about the great picnic was its orderliness considering that 550 boys were ranging the country in a compact mass. There was wonderfully little damage done to property why its genius did not stop shorted organizing the march in addition he arranged a system of officers which effectively control the animal spirits of the rank and file the prompt and decisive way in which rioters were dealt with during the earlier stages of the business proved a wholesome lesson to others who would have wished to have gone and done likewise a spirit of martial law reigned over the great picnic and towards the end of the day fatigue kept the rowdy minded quiet at Warfield the expedition launched it was not a market day fortunately or the confusion in the narrow streets would have been hopeless on ordinary days Warfield was more or less deserted and is astonishing that the resources of the little town were equal to satisfying the needs of the picnickers they descended on the place like an army of locusts why it is generalissimo of the expedition walked into the grasshopper and aunt the leading in of the town anything I can do for you sir inquired the landlord politely yes please said why I want lunch for 550 that was the supreme moment in my host's life it was his big subject of conversation ever afterwards he always told that as his best story and he always ended with the words you could have knocked me down with a feather the first shock over the staff of the grasshopper and aunt bustled about other ends were called upon for help private citizens rallied round with bread jam and apples and the army lunched sumptuously and the early afternoon they rested and as evening began to fall the March home was started at the school net practice was just coming to an end when faintly as the garrison of luck now heard the first squirrel of the pipes of the relieving force those on the grounds heard the strains of the school band and a murmur of many voices presently the sounds grew more distinct and up the rick and road came marching the vanguard of the column singing the school song they looked weary but cheerful as the army drew near to the school and melted away a little by little each house claiming its representatives at the school gates only a handful were left Bob Jackson walking back to Donaldson's met Wyatt at the gate and gazed at him speechless hello said Wyatt been to the nets I wonder if there's time for a ginger beer before the shop shuts end of chapter 11 end of section chapters 12 through 14 of Mike this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org Mike a public school story by PG Woodhouse chapter 12 Mike gets his chance the headmaster was quite bland and business like about it all there were no impassioned addresses from the dais he did not tell the school that it ought to be ashamed of itself nor did he say that he should never have thought it of them prayers on the Saturday morning were marked by no unusual features there was indeed a stir of excitement when he came to the edge of the dais and cleared his throat as a preliminary to making an announcement now for it thought the school this was the announcement there has been an outbreak of chicken pox in the town all streets except the high street will in consequence be out of bounds till further notice he then gave the nod of dismissal the school streamed downstairs marveling the lesser stewed of the picnickers unmindful of the homely proverb about hallowing before leaving the wood were openly exalting it seemed plain to them that the headmaster baffled by the magnitude of the thing had resolved to pursue the safe course of ignoring it all together to lie low is always a shrewd piece of tactics and there seemed no reason why the head should not have decided on it in the present instance neville smith was among these premature rejoicers I say he chuckled overtaking Wyatt in the cloisters this is all right isn't it he's funked it I thought he would find the job too big to tackle Wyatt was damping my dear chap he said it's not over yet by a long talk it hasn't started yet what do you mean why didn't he say anything about it in hall then why should he have you ever had tic at a shop of course I have what do you mean why well they didn't send in the bill right away but it came all right do you think he's going to do something then rather you wait Wyatt was right between 10 and 11 on Wednesdays and Saturdays old Bates the school sergeant used to copy out the names of those who were in extra lesson and post them outside the school shop the school inspected the list during the quarter to 11 interval today rushing to the shop for its midday bun the school was aware of a vast sheet of paper were usually there was but a small one they surged round it buns were forgotten what was it then the meaning of the notice flashed upon them the headmaster had acted this bloated document was the extra lesson list swollen with names as a stream swells with rain it was a comprehensive document it left out little the following boys will go into extra lesson this afternoon and next Wednesday it began and the following boys numbered four hundred Bates must have got writers cramps at clouds as he read the huge scroll Wyatt met Mike after school as they went back to the house seen the extra list he remarked none of the kids are in it I noticed only the bigger fellows rather a good thing I'm glad you got off thanks said Mike who was walking a little stiffly I don't know what you call getting off it seems to me you're the chaps who got off how do you mean we got tanned said Mike roofily what yes everybody below the upper fourth Wyatt roared with laughter by Gad he said he is an old sportsman I never saw such a man he lowers all records glad you think it funny you wouldn't have if you'd been me I was one of the first to get it he was quite fresh sting should think it did well buck up don't break down I'm not breaking down said Mike indignantly all right I thought you weren't anyhow you're better off than I am an extras nothing much said Mike it is what happens to come on the same day as the MCC match oh by Joe I forgot that's next Wednesday isn't it you won't be able to play no I say what rot it is rather still nobody can say I didn't ask for it if one goes out of one's way to beg and beseech the old man to put one in extra it would be a little rough on him to curse him when he does it I should be awfully sick if it were me well it isn't you so you're all right you'll probably get my place in the team Mike smiled dutifully at what he's supposed to be a humorous Sally or rather one of the places continued Wyatt who seemed to be sufficiently in earnest they'll put a bowler in instead of me probably Drew's but there'll be several vacancies let's see me Adams ash anymore no that's the lot I should think they'd give you a chance you needn't rot said Mike uncomfortably he had his daydreams like everybody else and they always took the form of playing for the first 11 and incidentally making a century in record time to have to listen while the subject was talked about lightly made him hot and prickly all over I'm not rotting said Wyatt seriously I'll suggest it to Burgess tonight you don't think there's any chance of a really do you said Mike awkwardly I don't see why not buck up in the scratch game this afternoon fielding especially Burgess is simply mad on fielding I don't blame him either especially as he's a bowler himself he'd shove a man into the team like a shot whatever his batting was like if his fielding was something extra special so you feel like a demon this afternoon and I'll carry on the good work in the evening I say said Mike overcome it's awfully decent of you Wyatt Billy Burgess captain of rick and cricket was a genial giant who seldom allowed himself to be ruffled the present was one of the rare occasions on which he permitted himself that luxury Wyatt found him in his study shortly before lockup full of strange oaths like the soldier in Shakespeare you brought her you brought her you worm he observed crisply as Wyatt appeared their old Billy said Wyatt come on give me a kiss and let's be friends you William William if it wasn't illegal I'd like to tie you and ash and that blaggered atoms up in a big sack and drop you into the river and I jump on the sack first what do you mean by letting the team down like this I know you were at the bottom of it all he struggled into his shirt he was changing after a bath and his face popped wrathfully out at the other end I'm awfully sorry Bill said Wyatt the fact is in the excitement of the moment the MCC match what clean out of my mind you haven't got a mind grumbled Burgess you've got a cheap brown paper substitute that's your trouble Wyatt turned the conversation tactfully how many wickets did you get today he asked eight for a hundred and three I was on the spot young Jackson caught a hot one off me at third man that kid's good why don't you play him against the MCC on Wednesday said Wyatt jumping at his opportunity what are you sitting on my left shoe no there it is in the corner right hole what were you saying why not play young Jackson for the first too small right what the size matter cricket isn't footer besides he isn't small he's as tall as I am I suppose he is dash I've dropped my stud Wyatt waited patiently till he had retrieved it then he returned to the attack he's as good a bat as his brother and a better field old Bob Kent field for toffee I will say that for him dropped a sitter off me today why the deuce fellows can't hold catches when they drop slowly into their mouths I'm hanged if I can see you play him said Wyatt just give him a trial that kid's a genius at cricket he's going to be better than any of his brothers even Joe give him a shot Burgess hesitated you know it's a bit risky he said with you three lunatics out of the team we can't afford to try many experiments better stick to the men at the top of the second Wyatt got up and kicked the wall as a vent for his feelings you router he said can't you see when you've got a good man here's this kid waiting for you ready made with a style like Trumpers and you rave about top men in the second chaps who play forward at everything and pat half volleys back to the bowler do you realize that your only chance of being known to posterity is as the man who gave him Jackson his colors at Reckon in a few years he'll be playing for England and you'll think it a favor if he nods to you in the pav at lords when you're a white-haired old man you'll go doddering about gas into your grandchildren poor kids how you discovered m. Jackson it'll be the only thing they'll respect you for Wyatt stopped for breath alright said Burgess I'll think it over frightful gift of the gab you've got Wyatt good said Wyatt think it over and don't forget what I said about the grandchildren you would like little Wyatt Burgess and the other little Burgesses to respect you in your old age wouldn't you very well then so long the bell went ages ago I shall be locked out on the Monday morning might pass the notice board just as Burgess turned away from pinning up the list of the team to play the MCC he read it and his heart missed a beat for bottom but one just above the WB Burgess was a name that leaped from the paper at him his own name chapter 13 the MCC match if the day happens to be fine there was a curious dreamlike atmosphere about the opening stages of a first 11 match everything seems hushed and expectant the rest of the school have gone in after the interval at 11 o'clock and you are alone on the grounds with a cricket bag the only signs of life are a few pedestrians on the road beyond the railings and one or two blazer and flannel clad forms in the pavilion the sense of isolation is trying to the nerves and the school team usually bats 25% better after lunch when the strangeness has worn off Mike walked across from Wayne's where he had changed feeling quite hollow he could almost have cried with pure fright Bob had shouted after him from a window as he passed Donaldson's to wait so that they could walk over together but conversation was the last thing Mike desired at that moment he had almost reached the pavilion when one of the MCC team came down the steps saw him and stopped dead by Joe Saunders cried Mike why master Mike the professional beam and quite suddenly the lost hopeless feeling left Mike he felt as cheerful as if he and Saunders had met in the meadow at home and we're just going to begin a little quiet net practice my master Mike you don't mean to say you're playing for the school already Mike nodded happily isn't it ripping he said Saunders slapped his leg in a sort of ecstasy didn't I always say it sir he chuckled wasn't I right I used to say to myself it'd be a pretty good school team that'd leave you out of course I'm only playing as a sub you know three chaps are an extra and I got one of the places well you'll make a hundred today master Mike and then they'll have to put you in wish I could master Joe's come down with the club said Saunders Joe has he really how ripping hello here he is hello Joe the greatest of all the Jacksons was descending the pavilion steps with the gravity befitting an all England batsman he stopped short as Saunders had done Mike you aren't playing yes well I'm hanged young Marvel isn't he Saunders he is sir said Saunders got all the strokes I always said it master Joe only wants the strength Joe took Mike by the shoulder and walked him off in the direction of a man in a Zingari blazer who is bowling slows to another of the MCC team Mike recognized him with awe as one of the three best amateur wicketkeepers in the country what do you think of this said Joe exhibiting Mike who grinned bashfully aged 10 last birthday and playing for the school you are only 10 aren't you Mike brother of yours asked the wicketkeeper probably too proud to own the relationship but he is isn't there any end do you Jacksons demanded the wicketkeeper and in a grieve tone I never saw such a family this is our star you wait till he gets at us today Saunders is our only bowler and Mike's been brought up on Saunders you'd better win the toss if you want a chance of getting a knock and lifting your average out of the minuses I have won the toss said the other with dignity do you think I don't know the elementary duties of a captain the school went out to field with mixed feelings the wicket was hard and true which would have made it pleasant to be going in first on the other hand they would feel decidedly better and fitter for centuries after the game had been in progress an hour or so Burgess was glad as a private individual sorry as a captain for himself the sooner he got hold of the ball and begin to bowl the better he liked it as a captain he realized that aside with Joe Jackson on it not to mention the other first class men was not aside to which he would have preferred to give away an advantage Mike was feeling that by no possibility could he hold the simplest catch and hoping that nothing would come his way Bob conscious of being an uncertain field was feeling just the same the MCC opened with Joe and a man in an Oxford authentic cap the beginning of the game was quiet Burgess's Yorker was nearly too much for the ladder in the first over but he contrived to chop it away and the pair gradually settled down at 20 Joe began to open his shoulders 20 became 40 with disturbing swiftness and Burgess tried to change a bowling it seemed for one instant as if the move had been a success for Joe still taking risks tried to late cut a rising ball and snicked it straight into Bob's hands at second slip it was the easiest of slip catches but Bob fumbled it dropped it almost held it a second time and finally let it fall miserably to the ground it was a moment too painful for words he rolled the ball back to the bowler in silence one of those weary periods followed when the batsman's defense seems to the field's been absolutely impregnable there was a sickening inevitableness in the way in which every ball was played with the very center of the bat and as usual just when things seemed most hopeless relief came the authentic getting in front of his wicket to pull one of the simplest long hops ever seen on a cricket field missed it and was LBW and the next ball upset the newcomer's leg stump the school revived bowlers and field were infused with a new life another wicket to stumps knocked out of the ground by Burgess helped the thing on when the bell rang for the end of morning school five wickets were down for a hundred and thirteen but from the end of school till lunch things went very wrong indeed Joe was still in at one end invincible and that the other was the great wicket keeper and the pair of them suddenly began to force the pace till the bowling was an entangled not four after four all round the wicket with never a chance or a miss hit to vary the monotony two hundred went up and two hundred and fifty then Joe reached his century and was stumped next ball then came lunch the rest of the innings was like the gentle rain after the thunderstorm runs came with fair regularity but wickets fell at intervals and when the wicket keeper was run out at length for a lively sixty three the end was very near Saunders coming in last hit two boundaries and was then caught by Mike his second hit had just lifted the MCC total over the three hundred three hundred is a score that takes some making on any ground but on a fine day it was not an unusual total for the rick and 11 some years before against ripped and they had run up four hundred and sixteen and only last season had massacred a very weak team of old rickinians with a score that only just missed the fourth hundred unfortunately on the present occasion there was scarcely time unless the bowling happened to get completely collared to make the runs it was a quarter to four when the innings began and stumps would be drawn at a quarter to seven a hundred an hour as quick work Burgess however was optimistic as usual better have a go for them he said to bearage in Mars the school first pair following out this courageous advice bearage after hitting three boundaries in his first two overs was stumped halfway through the third after this thing settled down Morris the first wicked man was a thoroughly sound bat a little on the slow side but exceedingly hard to shift he and marsh proceeded to play themselves in until it looked as if they were likely to stay till the drawing of stumps a comfortable rather somnolent feeling settled upon the school a long-standing cricket is a soothing sight to watch there was an absence of hurry about the batsman which harmonized well with the drowsy summer afternoon and yet runs were coming at a fair pace the hundred went up at five o'clock the hundred and fifty at half past both batsman were completely at home and the MCC third change bowlers had been put on then the great wicketkeeper took off the pads and gloves and the fieldman retired to post said the extreme edge of the ground lobs said Burgess by Joe I wish I was in it seemed to be the general opinion among the members of the rick and 11 on the pavilion balcony that Morris and Marsh were in lock the team did not grudge them their good fortune because they had earned it but they were distinctly envious lobs are the most dangerous insinuating things in the world everybody knows in theory the right way to treat them everybody knows that the man who is content not to try to score more than a single cannot get out to them yet nearly everybody does get out to them it was the same story today the first over yielded six runs all through gentle taps along the ground in the second Marsh hit an overpitched one along the ground to the terrace bank the next ball he swept round to the leg boundary and that was the end of Marsh he saw himself scoring at the rate of 24 and over off the last ball he was stumped by several feet having done himself credit by scoring 70 the long stand was followed as usual by a series of disasters Marsh's wicket had fallen at 180 LRB left at 186 by the time the scoring board registered 205 wickets were down three of them victims to the lobs Morris was still in at one end he had refused to be tempted he was jogging on steadily to his century Bob Jackson went in next with instructions to keep his eye on the lob man for a time things went well Saunders who had gone on to bowl again after a rest seemed to give Morris no trouble and Bob put him through the slips with apparent ease 20 runs were added when the lob bowler once more got in his deadly work Bob letting alone a ball wide of the off stump under the impression that it was going to break away was disagreeably surprised to find it break in instead and hit the wicket the bowler smiled sadly as if he hated to have to do these things Mike's heart jumped as he saw the bails go it was his turn next 229 said Burgess and it's ten past six no good trying for the runs now stick in he added to Mike that's all you've got to do all Mike felt as if he was being strangled his heart was racing like the engines of a motor he knew his teeth were chattering he wished he could stop them what a time Bob was taking to get back to the pavilion he wanted to rush out and get the thing over it last he arrived and Mike fumbling at a glove tottered out into the sunshine he heard miles and miles away a sound of clapping and the thin shrill noises if somebody was screaming in the distance as a matter of fact several members of his form and of the junior day room at Wayne's nearly burst themselves at that moment at the wickets he felt better Bob had fallen to the last ball of the over and Morris standing ready for Saunders his delivery looked so calm and certain of himself that it was impossible to feel entirely without hope and self-confidence Mike knew that Morris had made 98 and he supposed that Morris knew that he was very near his century yet he seemed to be absolutely undisturbed Mike drew courage from his attitude Morris pushed the first ball away to leg Mike would have liked to have run to but short leg had retrieved the ball as he reached the crease the moment had come the moment which he had experienced only in dreams and in the dreams he was always full of confidence and invariably hit a boundary sometimes a drive sometimes a cut but always a boundary to legs sir said the umpire don't be in a funk said a voice play straight and you can't get out it was Joe who had taken the gloves when the wicketkeeper went on to bowl Mike grinned wryly but gratefully Saunders was beginning his run it was also home like that for a moment might felt himself again how often he had seen those two little skips on the jump it was like being in the paddock again with Marjorie and the dogs waiting by the railings to fetch the ball if he made a drive Saunders ran to the crease and bold now Saunders was a conscientious man and doubtless bold the very best ball that he possibly could on the other hand it was Mike's first appearance for the school and Saunders besides being conscientious was undoubtedly kind-hearted it is useless to speculate as to whether he was trying to bowl his best that ball if so he failed signally it was a half volley just the right distance away from the off stump the sort of ball Mike was want to send nearly through the net at home the next moment the dreams had come true the umpire was signaling to the scoring box the school was shouting extra cover was trotting to the boundary to fetch the ball and Mike was blushing and wondering whether it was bad form to grin from that ball onwards all was for the best in this best of all possible worlds Saunders bold no more half volleys but Mike played everything that he did ball he met the lobs with a bat like a barn door even the departure of Morris caught in the slips off Saunders is next over for a chanceless 105 did not disturb him all nervousness had left him he felt equal to the situation Burgess came in and began to hit out as if he meant to knock off the runs the bowling became a shade loose twice he was given full tosses to leg which he hit to the terrace bank half past six chimed in 250 went up on the telegraph board Burgess continued to hit Mike's whole soul was concentrated on keeping up his wicket there was only Reeves to follow him and Reeves was a victim to the first straight ball Burgess had to hit because it was the only game he knew but he himself must simply stay in the hands of the clock seemed to have stopped then suddenly he heard the umpire say last over and he settled down to keep those six balls out of his wicket the lob bowler had taken himself off and the Oxford authentic had gone on fast left hand the first ball was short and wide of the off stump Mike let it alone number two Yorker got him three straight half volley Mike played it back to the bowler for beat him and missed the wicket by an inch five another Yorker down on it again in the old familiar way all was well the match was a draw now whatever happened to him he hit out almost at a venture at the last ball and mid-off jumping just failed to reach it it hummed over his head and ran like a streak along the turf and up the bank and a great howl of delight went up from the school as the umpire took off the bales Mike walked away from the wickets with Joe and the wicketkeeper I'm sorry about your nose Joe said the wicketkeeper in tones of grave solicitude what's wrong with it at present said the wicketkeeper nothing but in a few years I'm afraid it's going to be put badly out of joint chapter 14 a slight in Brolyo Mike got his third 11 colors after the MCC match as he had made 23 not out in a crisis in a first 11 match this may not seem an excessive reward but it was all that he expected one had to take the rungs of the ladder singly at ricken first one was given one third 11 cap that meant you are a promising man and we have our eye on you then came the second colors they might mean anything from well here you are you won't get any higher so you may as well have the thing now too this is just to show that we still have our eye on you Mike was a certainty now for the second but it needed more than one performance to secure the first cap I told you so said Wyatt naturally to Burgess after the match he's not bad said Burgess I'll give him another shot but Burgess as has been pointed out was not a person who ever became gushing with enthusiasm so Wilkins of the schoolhouse who had played twice for the first 11 dropped down into the second as many a good man had done before him and might got his place in the next match against the gentleman of the county unfortunately for him the visiting team however gentlemanly were not brilliant cricketers at any rate as far as bowling was concerned the school won the toss went in first and made three hundred and sixteen for five wickets Morris making another placid century the innings was declared closed before Mike had a chance of distinguishing himself in an innings which lasted for one over he made two runs not out and had to console himself for the cutting short of his performance by the fact that his average for the school was still infinity Bob who was one of those lucky enough to have an unabridged innings did better in this match making twenty five but with Morris making a hundred and seventeen and bearage Ellerby and Marsh all passing the half century this score did not show up excessively we now come to what was practically a turning point in Mike's career at Rickin there is no doubt that his meteor like flights at cricket had an unsettling effect on him he was enjoying life amazingly and as is not uncommon with the prosperous he waxed fat and kicked fortunately for him though he did not look upon it in that light at the time he kicked the one person that was most imprudent to kick the person he selected was Furby Smith with anybody else the thing might have blown over to the detriment of Mike's character but Furby Smith having the most tender affection for his dignity made a fuss it happened in this way the immediate cause of the disturbance was a remark of Mike's but the indirect cause was the unbearably patronizing manner which the head of Wayne's chose to adopt towards him the fact that he was playing for the school seemed to make no difference at all Furby Smith continued to address Mike merely as the small boy the following verbatim was the tactful speech which he addressed to him on the evening of the MCC match having summoned him to his study for the purpose well he said you played a very decent innings this afternoon and I suppose you're frightfully pleased with yourself eh well mind you don't go getting swelled head see that's all run along Mike departed bursting with fury the next link in the chain was forged a week after the gentleman of the county match house matches had begun and Wayne's were playing Applebee's Applebee's made a hundred and fifty odd shaping badly for the most part against why it slows then Wayne's opened their innings the gazika as head of the house was captain of the side and he and Wyatt went in first why it made a few mighty hits and was then caught at cover Mike went in first wicked for some ten minutes all was peace Furby Smith scratched away at his end getting here and there a single and now and then a two and Mike settled down at once to play what he felt was going to be the innings of a lifetime Applebee's bowling was on the feeble side with rakes of the third 11 as the star supported by some small change Mike pounded it vigorously to one who had been brought up on Saunders rakes possessed few subtleties he had made 17 and was thoroughly set when the gazika who had the bowling hit one in the direction of cover point with a certain type of batsman a single is a thing to take big risks for and the gazika badly wanted that single come on he shouted prancing down the pitch Mike who had remained in his crease with the idea that nobody even moderately sane would attempt to run for a hit like that moved forward in a startled and irresolute manner Furby Smith arrived shouting run and cover having thrown the ball in the wicketkeeper removed the bales these are solemn moments the only possible way of smoothing over an episode of this kind is for the guilty man to grovel Furby Smith did not grovel easy run there you know he said reprovingly the world swam before Mike's eyes through the red mist he could see Furby Smith's face the sun glinted on his rather prominent teeth to Mike's distorted vision it seemed that the criminal was amused don't laugh you grinning ape he cried it isn't funny he then made for the trees where the rest of the team were sitting now Furby Smith not only possessed rather prominent teeth he was also sensitive on the subject Mike shaft sank in deeply the fact that emotion caused him to swipe at a straight half volley miss it and be bold next ball made the wound wrinkle he avoided Mike on his return to the trees and Mike feeling now a little apprehensive avoided him the gazika brooded apart for the rest of the afternoon chewing the insult at close of play he sought Burgess Burgess besides being captain of the 11 was also head of the school he was the man who arranged prefects meetings and only a prefects meeting thought Furby Smith could adequately avenge his lacerated dignity I want to speak to you Burgess he said what's up said Burgess you know young Jackson in our house what about him he's been frightfully insolent cheek do you said Burgess a man of simple speech I want you to call a prefects meeting and lick him Burgess looked incredulous rather a large order a prefects meeting he said it has to be a pretty serious sort of thing for that frightful cheek to a school prefect is a serious thing said Furby Smith with the air of one uttering an epigram well I suppose what did he say to you Furby Smith related the painful details Burgess started to laugh but turns the laugh into a cough yes he said meditatively rather thick still I mean a prefects meeting rather like crushing a thing of me with the what do you call it besides he's a decent kid who's frightfully conceited oh well well anyhow look here I'll think it over and let you know tomorrow it's not the sort of thing to rush through without thinking about it and the matter was left temporarily at that end of chapter 14 end of section chapters 15 through 17 of Mike this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org Mike a public school story by PG Woodhouse chapter 15 Mike creates a vacancy Burgess walked off the ground feeling that fate was not using him well here was he a well meaning youth who wanted to be on good terms with all the world being jockeyed into slaughtering a kid who's batting he admired and whom personally he liked and the worst of it was that he sympathized with Mike he knew what it felt like to be run out just when one had got set and he knew exactly how maddening the gazikas manner would be on such an occasion on the other hand officially he was bound to support the head of Wayne's prefects must stand together or chaos will come he thought he would talk it over with somebody Bob occurred to him it was only fair that Bob should be told as the nearest of kin and here was another grievance against fate Bob was a person he did not particularly wish to see just then for that morning he had posted up the list of the team to play for the school against gettington one of the four schools which Rick and Mettit cricket and Bob's name did not appear on that list several things had contributed to that melancholia mission in the first place gettington to judge from the weekly reports in the sportsmen and field were strong this year at batting in the second place the results of the last few matches and particularly the MCC match had given Burgess the idea that Rickon was weak at bowling it became necessary therefore to drop a batsman out of the team in favor of a bowler and either Mike or Bob must be the man Burgess was as rigidly conscientious as the captain of a school 11 should be Bob was one of his best friends and he would have given much to be able to put him in the team but he thought the thing over and put the temptation sturdily behind him at batting there was not much to choose between the two but in fielding there was a great deal Mike was good Bob was bad so out Bob had gone and Neville Smith a fair fast bowler at all times and on his day dangerous took his place these clashings of public duty with private inclination are the drawbacks to the despotic position of captain of cricket at a public school it is awkward having to meet your best friend after you have dropped him from the team and it is difficult to talk to him as if nothing had happened Burgess felt very self-conscious as he entered Bob's study and was rather glad that he had a topic of conversation ready to hand busy Bob he asked hello said Bob with a cheerfulness rather overdone in his anxiety to show Burgess the man that he did not hold him responsible in any way for the distressing acts of Burgess the captain take a pew don't these studies get beastly hot this weather there's some ginger beer in the cupboard have some no thanks I say Bob look here I want to see you well you can't you this is me sitting over here the tall dark handsome chap it's awfully awkward you know continued Burgess gloomily that ass of a young brother of yours sorry but he is an ass though he's your brother thanks for the though Billy you know how to put a thing nicely what's Mike been up to it's that old fool the gazika he came to me frothing with rage and wanted me to call a prefect meeting and touch young like up Bob displayed interest and excitement for the first time prefects meeting what the dickens is up what's he been doing Smith must be drunk what's all the row about Burgess repeated the main facts of the case as he had them from Fermi Smith personally I sympathize with the kid he added still the gazika is a prefect Bob not a pen holder morose Lee silly young idiot he said sickening thing being run out suggested Burgess still I know it's rather hard to see what to do I suppose if the gazika insists one's bound to support him I suppose so awful rot prefects licking's aren't meant for that sort of thing they're supposed to be for kids who steal buns at the shop or muck about generally not for a chap who curses a fellow who runs him out I tell you what there's just a chance for be Smith won't press the thing he hadn't had time to get over it when he saw me by now he'll have simmered down a bit look here you're a pal of his aren't you well go and ask him to drop the business say you'll curse your brother and make him apologize and that I'll kick him out of the team for the getting to match it was a difficult moment for Bob one cannot help one's thoughts and for an instant the idea of going to getting to him with the team as he would certainly do if Mike did not play made him waiver but he recovered himself don't do that he said I don't see there's a need for anything of that sort you must play the best side you've got I can easily talk the old gazika over he gets all right in a second if he's treated the right way I'll go and do it now Burgess looked miserable I say Bob he said yes oh nothing I mean you're not a bad sort with which glowing eulogy he dashed out of the room thanking his stars that he had won through a confoundedly awkward business Bob went across to Wayne's to interview and soothe Furby Smith he found that outraged hero sitting moody in his study like Achilles in his tent seeing Bob he became all animation look here he said I wanted to see you you know that frightful young brother of yours I know I know said Bob Burgess was telling me he wants kicking he wants a frightful licking from the prefects he meant of the aggrieved party well I don't know you know not much good lugging the prefects into it is there I mean apart from everything else not much of a catch for me would it be having to sit there and look on I'm a prefect to you know Furby Smith looked a little blank at this he had a great admiration for Bob I didn't think of you he said I thought you hadn't said Bob you see it now though don't you Furby Smith returned to the original grievance well you know it was frightful cheek of course it was still I think if I saw him and cursed him and sent him up to you to apologize how would that do all right after all I did run him out yes there's that of course Mike's all right really it isn't as if he did that sort of thing as a habit no all right then thanks said Bob and went to find Mike the lecture on deportment which he read that future all England batsman in a secluded passage near the junior day room left the ladder rather limp and exceedingly meat for the moment all the jottiness and exuberance had been drained out of him he was a punctured balloon reflection and the distinctly discouraging replies of those experts in school law to whom he had put the question what do you think he'll do had induced a very chastened frame of mind he perceived that he had walked very nearly into a hornet's nest and the realization of his escape made him agree readily to all the conditions imposed the apology to the gazika was made without reserve and the offensively forgiving say no more about it but take care in future air of the head of the house roused no spark of resentment in him so subdued with his fighting spirit all he wanted was to get the thing done with he was not inclined to be critical and most of all he felt grateful to Bob Furby Smith in the course of his address had not admitted to lay stress on the importance of Bob's intervention but for Bob he gave him to understand he Mike would have been prosecuted with the utmost rigor of the law Mike came away with a confused picture in his mind of a horde of furious prefects bent on his slaughter after the manner of a stage excited crowd and Bob waving them back he realized that Bob had done him a good turn he wished he could find some way of repaying him curiously enough it was an enemy of Bob's who suggested the way Burton of Donaldson's Burton was a slippery young gentleman 14 years of age who had frequently come into contact with Bob in the house and owed him many grudges with Mike he had always tried to form an alliance though without success he happened to meet Mike going to school next morning and unburdened his soul to him it chanced that Bob and he had had another small encounter immediately after breakfast and Burton felt revengeful I say said Burton I'm jolly glad you're playing for the first against gettington thanks said Mike I'm especially glad for one reason what's that inquired Mike without interest because your beast of a brother has been chucked out he'd have been playing but for you at any other time Mike would have heard Bob called a beast without active protest he would have felt that it was no business of his to fight his brother's battles for him but on this occasion he deviated from his rule he kicked Burton not once or twice but several times so that Burton retiring hurriedly came to the conclusion that it must be something in the Jackson blood some taint as it were they were all beasts Mike walked on weighing this remark and gradually made up his mind it must be remembered that he was in a confused mental condition and that the only thing he realized clearly was that Bob had pulled him out of an uncommonly nasty hole it seemed to him that it was necessary to repay Bob he thought the thing over more fully during school and his decision remained unaltered on the evening before the gettington match just before lockup Mike tapped at Burgess's study door he tapped with his right hand for his left was in a sling come in y'all the captain hello I'm awfully sorry Burgess said Mike I've cracked my wrist a bit how did you do that you were all right at the net slipped as I was changing said Mike solidly is it bad nothing much I'm afraid I shouldn't be able to play tomorrow I say that's bad luck beastly bad luck we wanted your batting to be all right though in a day or two I suppose oh yes rather hope so anyway thanks good night good night and Burgess with the comfortable feeling that he had managed to combine duty and pleasure after all wrote a note to Bob at Donaldson's telling him to be ready to start with a team for gettington by the 854 next morning chapter 16 an expert examination Mike's uncle John was a wanderer on the face of the earth he had been an army surgeon in the days of his youth and after an adventurous career mainly in Afghanistan had inherited enough money to keep him in comfort for the rest of his life he had there upon left the service and now spent most of his time flitting from one spot of Europe to another he had been dashing up to Scotland on the day when Mike first became a Rikinian but a few weeks in an uncomfortable hotel in sky and a few days in a comfortable one in Edinburgh had left him with the impression that he had now seen all that there was to be seen in north Britain and might reasonably shift his camp again coming south he had looked in on Mike's people for a brief space and at the request of Mike's mother took the early express to Rikin in order to pay a visit of inspection his telegram arrived during morning school Mike went down to the station to meet him after lunch uncle John took command of the situation at once school playing anybody today Mike I want to see a match they're playing gettington only it's away there's a second match on why aren't you hello I didn't see what you've been doing to yourself crocked my wrist a bit it's nothing much how did you do that slipped while I was changing after cricket hurt not much thanks doctor seen it no but it's really nothing be all right by Monday hmm somebody ought to look at it I'll have a look later on Mike did not appear to relish this prospect it isn't anything uncle John really it doesn't matter a bit never mind it won't do any harm having somebody examine it who knows a bit about these things now what shall we do go on the river I shouldn't be able to steer I could manage about that still I think I should like to see the place first your mother sure to ask me if you showed me round it's like going over the stables when you're stopping at a country house got to be done and better do it as soon as possible it is never very interesting playing the part of showman at school both Mike and his uncle were inclined to scamp the business Mike pointed out the various landmarks without much enthusiasm it is only after one has left a few years at the school buildings take to themselves romance and uncle John said ah yes I see very nice two or three times in an absent voice and they passed on to the cricket field where the second eleven were playing a neighboring engineering school it was a glorious day the sun had never seemed to Mike so bright or the grass so green it was one of those days when the ball looks like a large vermilion colored football as it leaves the bowler's hand if ever there was a day when it seemed to Mike that a century would have been a certainty it was this Saturday a sudden bitter realization of all he had given up swept over him but he choked the feeling down the thing was done and it was no good brooding over the might have been now still and the getting to ground was supposed to be one of the easiest scoring grounds of all the public schools well hit by George remarked uncle John as Trevor who had gone in first wicket for the second eleven swept a half volley to leg ground to the bank where they were sitting that's Trevor said Mike Chapman Donaldson's the fellow at the other end is Wilkins he's in the schoolhouse they look as if they were getting set by Joe he said enviously pretty good fun batting on a day like this uncle John detected the envious note I suppose you would have been playing here but for your wrist no I was playing for the first for the first for the school my word Mike I didn't know that no wonder you're feeling badly treated of course I remember your father saying you had played once for the school and done well but I thought that was only as a substitute I didn't know you were a regular member of the team what bad luck will you get another chance depends on Bob has Bob got your place Mike nodded if he does well today they'll probably keep him in isn't there room for both of you such a lot of old colors there are only three vacancies and Henry got one of those a week ago I expect I'll give one of the other two to a bowler Neville Smith I should think if he does well against getting then there will be only the last place left rather awkward that still it's Bob's last year I've got plenty of time but I wish I could get in this year after they had watched the match for an hour Uncle John's restless nature asserted itself suppose we go for a pull on the river now he suggested they got up let's just call it the shop said Mike there ought to be a telegram from getting can by this time I wonder how Bob's got on apparently Bob had not had a chance yet of distinguishing himself the telegram read getting to 151 for for lunch not bad that said Mike but I believe they're weak and bowling they walk down the road towards the school landing stage the worst of the school said Uncle John as he pulled upstream with strong unskillful stroke is that one isn't allowed to smoke on the grounds I badly want a pipe the next piece of shade that you see singing out and will put in there pull your left said Mike that will is what you want Uncle John looked over his shoulder caught a crab recovered himself and steered the boat in under the shade of the branches put the rope over that stump can you manage with one hand here let me done it good ah he blew a great cloud of smoke into the air and side contentedly I hope you don't smoke Mike no rotten trick for a boy when you get to my age you need it boys ought to be thinking about keeping themselves fit and being good at games which reminds me let's have a look at the wrist a hunted expression came into Mike's eyes it's really nothing he began but his uncle had already removed the sling and was examining the arm with a neat rapidity of one who has been brought up to such things to Mike it seemed as if everything in the world was standing still and waiting he could hear nothing but his own breathing his uncle pressed the wrist gingerly once or twice and gave it a little twist that hurt he asked yet no stammered Mike Uncle John looked up sharply Mike was crimson what's the game inquired Uncle John Mike said nothing there was a twinkle in his uncle's eyes may as well tell me I won't give you away why this wounded warrior business when you've no more the matter with you than I have Mike hesitated I only wanted to get out of having to write this morning there was an exam on the idea had occurred to him just before he spoke it had struck him as neat and plausible to Uncle John it did not appear in the same light do you always write with your left hand and if you had gone with the first 11 to getting to wouldn't that have got you out of your exam try again when in doubt one may as well tell the truth Mike told it I know it wasn't that really only well oh well dash it all then old Bob got me out of an awful row the day before yesterday and he seemed a bit sick at not playing for the first so I thought I might as well let him that's how it was look here swear you won't tell him Uncle John was silent inwardly he was deciding that the five shillings which he had intended to bestow on Mike on his departure should become a sovereign this and maybe mentioned as an interesting biographical fact was the only occasion in his life on which Mike earned money at the rate of fifteen shillings a half minute swear you won't tell him he'd be most frightfully sick if he knew I won't tell him conversation dwindled to vanishing point Uncle John smoked on in weighty silence while Mike staring up at the blue sky through the branches of the willow let his mind wander to Gettington where his fate was even now being sealed how had the school got on what had Bob done if he made about twenty would they give him his cap supposing a faint snore from Uncle John broke in on his medications then there was a clatter as a briar pipe dropped on to the floor of the boat and his uncle sat up gaping Joe if I was nearly asleep what's the time just on six didn't know it was so late I ought to be getting back soon I think lockups that half past up with the anchor then you can tackle that rope with two hands now a we are not observed don't fall overboard I'm going to shove her off there'll be another telegram I should think said Mike as they reach the school gates shall we go and look they walk to the shop a second piece of gray paper had been pinned up under the first Mike pushed his way through the crowd it was a longer message this time it ran as follows wickets nevel smith four ricken two seventy for nine barrage eighty six mars fifty eight jackson forty eight Mike worked his way back through the throng and rejoined his uncle well said Uncle John we won he paused for a moment Bob made forty eight he added carelessly Uncle John felt in his pocket and silently slid a sovereign into Mike's hand it was the only possible reply chapter seventeen another vacancy Wyatt got back late that night arriving at the dormitory as Mike was going to bed by jove I'm done he said it was simply baking at gettington and I came back in a carriage with nevel smith and elegy and they ragged the whole time I wanted to go to sleep only they wouldn't let me old smith was awfully bucked because he'd taken four wickets I should think he'd go off his nut if he took eight ever he was singing comic songs when he wasn't trying to put L.R.B. under the seat how's your wrist oh better thanks Wyatt began to undress any colors asked Mike after a pause first eleven colors were generally given in the pavilion after a match are on the journey home no only one or two thirds Jenkins and Clefane and another chap can't remember who no first though what was Bob's innings like not bad a bit lucky he ought to have been out before he'd scored and he was out when he made about sixteen only the umpire didn't seem to know that it's L.B.W. when you get your leg right in front of the wicked and the ball hits it never saw a clear case in my life I was in at the other end bit rotten for the gettington chaps just lost them in the match their umpire two bit of luck for Bob he didn't give the ghost of a chance after that I should have thought that have given him his colors most captains would have done only Burgess is so keen on fielding that he rather keeps off it why did he field badly rottenly and the man always will choose Billy's bowling to drop catches off and Billy would cut his rich uncle from Australia if he kept on dropping them off him Bob's fieldings perfectly sinful he was pretty bad at the beginning of the season but now he's got so nervous that he's a dozen times worse he turns a delicate green when he sees a catch coming he left their best man off twice in one over off Billy today and the chap went on and made a hundred odd ripping innings by those two chances I hear he's got an average of eighty in school matches this season beastly man and when he does give a couple of easy chances Bob puts them both on the floor Billy wouldn't have given him his cap after the match if he'd made a hundred Bob's the sort of man who wouldn't catch a ball if you handed it to him on a plate with water crest rounded Burgess reviewing the match that night as he lay awake in his cubicle had come to much the same conclusion he was very fond of Bob but two missed catches in one over was straining the bonds of human affection too far there would have been serious trouble between David and Jonathan if either had persisted in dropping catches off the other's bowling he writhed in bed as he remembered the second of the two chances which the wretched Bob had refused the scene was indelibly printed on his mind chap had got a late cut which he fancied rather with great dial he had fed this late cut sent down a couple which he put to the boundary just as he had expected and he felt that life was a good thing after all when the ball just touched the corner of the bat and flew into Bob's hands and Bob dropped it the memory was too bitter if he dwelt on it he felt he would get insomnia so he turned to pleasanter reflections the Yorker which had shattered the second wicketman and the slow head ball which had led to a big hitter being caught on the boundary soothed by these memories he fell asleep next morning he found himself in a softened frame of mind he thought of Bob's iniquities with sorrow rather than wrath he felt towards him much as a father feels towards a prodigal son whom there is still a chance of reforming he overtook Bob on his way to chapel directness was always one of Burgess's leading qualities look here Bob about your fielding it's simply awful Bob was all remorse it's those beastly slip catches I can't time them that one yesterday was right into your hands both of them were I know I'm frightfully sorry well but I mean why can't you hold them it's no good being a good bat you're that all right if you're going to give away runs in the field do you know I believe I should do better in the deep I could get time to watch them there I wish you'd give me a shot in the deep for the second second be blowed I want your batting in the first do you think you'd really do better in the deep I'm almost certain I should I'll practice like mad Trevor all hit me up catches I hate the slips I get in the dickens of a funk directly the bowler starts his run now I know that if a catch does come I shall miss it I'm certain the deep would be much better all right then try it the conversation turned to less pressing topics in the next two matches accordingly Bob figured on the boundary where he had not much to do except throw the ball back to the bowler and stop an occasional drive along the carpet the beauty of fielding in the deep is that no unpleasant surprises can be sprung upon one there is just that moment or two for collecting one's thoughts which makes the whole difference Bob as he stood regarding the game from afar found his self-confidence returning slowly drop by drop as for Mike he played for the second and hoped for the day his opportunity came at last it will be remembered that on the morning after the great picnic the headmaster made an announcement in Hall to the effect that only to an outbreak of chickenpox in the town all streets except the high street would be out of bounds this did not affect the bulk of the school for most of the shops to which anyone ever thought of going were in the high street but there were certain inquiring minds who like to ferret about corners among these was one leather twig of Seymours better known in criminal circles as shoe blossom shoe blossom was a curious mixture of the energetic rager and the quiet student on a Monday evening you would hear a hideous uproar proceeding from Seymours junior day room and going down with a swagger stick to investigate you would find a tangled heap of squealing humanity on the floor and at the bottom of the heap squealing louder than any two others would be shoe blossom his collar burst and blackened in his face apoplectically crimson on the Tuesday afternoon strolling in some shady corner of the grounds you would come upon him lying on his chest deep in some work of fiction and resentful of interruption on the Wednesday morning he would be in receipt of four hundred lines from his house master for breaking three windows in a gas globe essentially it happened about the date of the getting to match that he took out from the school library a copy of the iron pirate and for the next day or two he wandered about like a lost spirit trying to find a sequestered spot in which to read it his inability to hit on such a spot was rendered more irritating by the fact that to judge from the first few chapters which he had managed to get through during prep one night under the eye of a short-sided master last word in hot stuff he tried the junior day room but people through cushions at him he tried out of doors and a ball hit from a neighboring net nearly scalped him anything in the nature of concentration became impossible in these circumstances then he recollected that in a quiet backwater off the high street there was a little confectioner's shop where tea might be had at a reasonable sum and also what was more important peace he made his way there and in the dingy back shop all amongst the dust and blue bottles settled down to a thoughtful perusal of chapter six upstairs at the same moment the doctor was recommending that master john george the son of the house be kept warm and out of drafts and not permitted to scratch himself however necessary such an action might seem to him in brief he was attending J.G. for chicken pox shoe blossom came away entering the high street furtively last authority should see him out of bounds and returned to the school where he went about his lawful occasions as if there were no such thing as chicken pox in the world but all the while the microbe was getting in some unastentatious but clever work a week later shoe blossom began to feel queer he had occasional headaches and found himself oppressed by a queer distaste for food the professional advice of Dr.Oaks the school doctor was called for and shoe blossom took up his abode in the infirmary where he read punch sucked oranges and thought of life two days later Barry felt queer he too disappeared from society chicken pox is no respect to a person's the next victim was marsh of the first eleven marsh who was top of the school averages where were his drives now his late cuts that were want to set the pavilion in a roar wrapped in a blanket and looking like the spotted marvel of a traveling circus he was driven across to the infirmary in a four-wheeler and it became incumbent upon Burgess to select a substitute for him and so it came about that Mike soared once again into the ranks of the elect and found his name down in the team to play against the incogniti end of section six