 Uh, as, uh, as, uh, Mr. Vine just, uh, said, I am Sonia Davis Lewis and I am a survivor. Thank you. I can finally say that without shame as if the burden of the shame was mine to bear being victimized and treated like you're less than human is something nobody wants to share that we want to keep it in silence and in secret because we don't want anybody to think that we're weak and that's the perception of most victims because I often hear people say oh that wouldn't happen to me or that couldn't happen to me how could you stay and I stayed for 18 years but I'll say this and I often say this to people who ask that question I didn't become a victim by happenstance I was conditioned to be a victim you see I was sexually molested at eight years old by somebody that I trusted I watched domestic violence in my home and in my family for most of my life so that was normal to me domestic violence equated to love for me so that's why I stayed I'm gonna share a story one story with you um I was at the Columbia mall in the early 2000s shopping for Easter for my boys as I perused through the store my abuser came up behind me and grabbed me by the back of my shirt and drugged me out of the mall as I tried to ditch the things that I had in my hand because I didn't want to be accused of stealing I was drug out of the store and into the mall parking lot where I was punched in the face I was slapped I was kicked I was down on the ground crouching against my car when all of a sudden I saw four legs come up and I thought to myself somebody is here to help me and I was so grateful because I was in so much pain and more than the pain was the shame that somebody was going to recognize me and see me all of a sudden these two security guards from the mall grabbed my abuser and they were holding his arms and I was able to brace myself and stand up and they said to him you can't do that here you have to take her home to do that how many of you know that that's exactly what he did he took me home and he finished what he started what set that off he said that I was smiling at a clerk that I if you offered me a million dollars I couldn't tell you who he was talking about but you see there's no rationalization to domestic violence it says off it's as if they all read from the same book because the behaviors are all the same it's never about what you do or what you don't do you can't fix them and that was always my thought that if I just loved him a little more if I just took care of the kids a little better if I just cooked dinner you know every day and kept the house clean that it would be better but in 18 years it never got better I went to work every day black eyes and bruises my co-workers made fun of me they laughed they told jokes when I walked in the cafeteria I was the butt of jokes but I made it through all of that because when I was in grad school one night I was leaving class and see I had to rush home because he knew what time I got out of class and he knew how long it took me to drive from the campus campus of Webster University to my home up in the summit so I was hesitant when my instructor asked me to stay after class because she wanted to talk to me so I was rushing to get out and there was somebody else taking her time and talking to her and I went to walk past her and all she did was slip me something in my hand and I took it and went to my car and when I got there it was a car that says sister care the very next Saturday morning I was punched in the face because I wanted to go to a soccer game for my goddaughter and I took that opportunity to take that card that I had hidden away in my book bag and I contacted sister care and they helped me she helped me develop a safety plan so that I could leave she went to court with me so that I could get my restraining order and I'm so thankful for organizations like sister care and the sheriff's department they gave me an advocate and they stood with me and people think I'm 15 years removed from my domestic violence 15 years a survivor but it's not over it's not over I battle every day my abuser often says to other people why can't she just get over it it's been 15 years why can't she just get over it but some things hit you so hard and they hurt you so bad you'll never get over it I'm irrevocably broken but I hear I am I'm surviving and I'm thriving and I'm determined to move forward each and every day that's why I had to get over the shame of it and stand here and say that's not my shame to bear but I got out and I survived and you can too and I want to encourage anybody that's in that situation because see I wore it well two things that victims of domestic violence are great at keeping secrets and telling lies in my house it was always told to me what goes on in this house it stays in this house but see I got two daughters and I didn't carry on that tradition I told my two girls if something is hurting you you better come tell me because I'm gonna fix it you don't go home home is supposed to be security and safety it's not supposed to be a place where you drive down the street and you cry because you're almost there I am an example that's why I'm willing to put myself out here to tell my story to get over the shame and the humiliation I felt at being a victim because I know that I'm not the only one I used to believe that I was but today I know I'm not the only one but I got out and I'm thanking God every day for those advocates at Richland County Sheriff Department for sister care who stood beside me every step of the way and as I said 15 years removed I'm still in counseling forever suffering from PTSD but yeah here I am I'm here I wake up every morning and I give myself a hug because I made it I'm my own hero so I say to anybody else out there who's suffering and going through what I went through you too there are people and places that can help you you can reach out to me I'm on Facebook I'm always an open book willing and able to help and there are other places such as sister care and I'm you know I know there are many other places but that was where I found my freedom and that's why I will forever be thankful to them and I hope I'm encouraging somebody to step up and step out today find you and fall in love with you and then you can walk your path and live your truth thank you