 Hello everyone, welcome again to another NARC Survivor Live video, another big topic today. Many of you are dealing with these narcissists and it's like they're constantly coming after you. They're constantly on your case and it's like no matter what you do they never leave you alone. They're always over your shoulder, they're always making these demands and holding you to these impossible and unrealistic expectations. And it's draining your energy, it's weighing you down. So you decided to click on this video today because you want to know how to get them off your back. Before I begin please give this video a thumbs up down below. It is very important as it helps the YouTube algorithm and it will get this message out there. So before we get into this today please hit that thumbs up button down below to show your support. But yes this will make the narcissist run off faster than Usain Bolt. And if you don't know I believe Usain Bolt, he was a record holder for the 100 meter and 200 meter sprint. So yes he can run pretty fast. So just imagine the narcissist running off faster than Usain Bolt. Just let that image sit in your mind for a moment. You know what the narcissist wants? They want to be around someone who makes them feel safe, stable, comfortable and secure. Someone who is out there back and call. Someone who meets or tries to meet their every demand, wish and expectation. Because that is how they feel comfortable. When you're always there for them, you're always listening to them and you're neglecting your own feelings, wants, desires and needs to try and please this unpleasable person. When it's like no matter what you do it is never good enough. They're never satisfied with you. But here is the thing and here is what will make them run off faster than Usain Bolt. Yes that big frightening narcissist who seemed to overpower you in every situation. And it's like no matter what you did you could never get them off your back. This is what will make them run away and you don't have to fight them. You don't have to argue with them. You don't have to do any of that. All you have to do to make a narcissist run off faster than Usain Bolt is to see them as they actually are. Because as you probably noticed all of these people that are around them maybe they're other sources of supply that enablers and flying monkeys they don't see the narcissist as they actually are. They see and validate the false image where the narcissist is attractive and desirable. They're all powerful, they're important, they're wealthy, intelligent, beautiful. They're all of these things to the enablers, the flying monkeys, their other supplies. And that is how they manage to keep these other people around them because they're supporting this false image. So that narcissist is quite comfortable around those people but when you begin to lift the wall that they pulled over your eyes and you see right through them instead of continuing to validate the illusion that is when the narcissist will run off faster than Usain Bolt that moment that you begin to see through them and their attempts of devaluing you are no longer effective because you're no longer susceptible to their manipulation. In that moment they just can't be around you. They can't even sit in a space with you because you know who they really are. You know what they're really about and you know that because they've done all of these things to you. They've done all of these horrific things. They've harmed you, they devalued you, they insulted you, they put you down. They cheated on you, they lied to you, they stole from you. They future-faked all of these things that they did. That's who they really are. That is the real person beneath the mask even though they may avoid accountability for their actions because here is the thing. It may look like the narcissist is running away from you. In actuality they are running from themselves and they're running off into the arms of their enablers, their flying monkeys, maybe their new supply, all of these people who don't really know them because if they really knew them they would be acknowledging and holding them accountable for everything that they did to you. So whatever they've got, these connections, these campaigns, these other sources, it's all fake. If it was real, if any of it was real on either side the first thing they would do is hold themselves accountable and they would be expecting other people to hold them accountable for their actions as well if they even desired to have anything real. And that is how you know that it is all fake. Although they may be running off into another situation, it's not real. What was real was what they did to you. All of those hurtful things they did to you. That was real. And yet they ran away from that because they didn't want to deal with it. They didn't want to accept it. They disowned these parts of themselves that they didn't like and assigned them to you. They tried to run away from it and they tried to create this new character in another situation with someone else, but that's not who they really are. Remember all of that time they spent with you? All of those things they did to you? That was real. That was a part, an effect of who they really are. And if they don't own up to it, they don't hold themselves accountable for their actions and they just run off into another situation. It's not real. Their new relationship is not real. Their smear campaign is not real. And even who they are is not real. Because if it was real, what about all of these things that they did to you? They didn't take accountability for any of that. So they've just disowned these parts of themselves. Well us, as victims, as survivors, we take accountability. We hold on to these parts of ourselves because we want to be better, we want to be greater. We want to learn from our mistakes. And you look at these narcissists, this is why they do what they do. Because they have been running from accountability their entire lives that are emotionally underdeveloped. Because they haven't owned up to their actions, choices and decisions throughout their lives. Instead all they've done is point the finger at everyone else. They've shifted the blame onto other people and expected them to deal with it instead. And yet we look at them and we wonder why they're so weak emotionally. Why they're so sensitive. And it's like any little thing you do causes a narcissistic injury. Anything you say gets under their skin because they've never had to deal with anything authentically in their entire lives. All they've ever done is run from it. Leave it for someone else to deal with it and take accountability for their bad choices, for their faults or mistakes. So what you're dealing with it's like a child. It may look like an adult but underneath that emotionally you're just dealing with someone who runs from adult situations where they should be holding themselves accountable. As you may have noticed that whenever you confront them on anything what do they do? They throw a temper tantrum like a 2 year old child. They become passive aggressive. Maybe they start slamming doors. They give you the silent treatment. They can't have an adult conversation with you. They don't want to try to work on themselves because they already know they understand that they're so far behind in life. They're so far behind the rest of us who were disciplined in our childhood. We didn't grow up with this arrogance and sense of entitlement but it's like we don't have to work towards anything in our relationships, in our lives. We could just come in and manipulate someone, lie to them, future fake and then when things start to get serious and we're supposed to take accountability then they run off and it's because they just can't deal with adult situations or relationships. They just wouldn't even know where to begin and that is how you know wherever they go, whoever they're with, whatever they're doing it's nothing real. It's nothing that an adult like ourselves would be satisfied with because what do we do? We take accountability for where we find ourselves. We try to make things better. We try to make things right. We don't just go off running away from ourselves in every situation where we experience a little bit of trouble. We cause a problem, we make a mistake. That is what narcissists do because as I said it's a child in an adult body. You're not even dealing with a fully developed human being who owns up to their choices and decisions instead of just shifting the blame onto everyone else and expecting them to deal with it. If you look at it, you were their mummy, their daddy cleaning up after everything for them after the mess that they made in their lives which they then piled onto you and they expected you to deal with that because they couldn't own up to their own choices and decisions like an adult. They parentified you and in some ways they also infantilized you because they always had to hold this authority of position over you but they were never meant to be there so they directed the relationship in the wrong direction which ended up being unfairable for both of you. But what do they do? They jump ship every time. They want to be the captain of the ship. But guess what? If you're the captain of the ship and you want to make all of the decisions but captain's meant to go down with that ship that's how it's supposed to go. And I know any of us, if we were in that position if we were the captain's we would have gone down with that ship. We would have gone down with it we would have taken accountability for when we found ourselves and then we would have tried to change things and make things better but Narcissus, they want to be in control they want to be the captain of the ship and then when things start to go down they want to jump off and leave you on there but what they don't realise is they're actually sinking the ship and drowning both of you. You're both getting drowned because it is affecting them too. I mean just think about it, if they actually treated you right from the very beginning things could have worked out far better for them they would have gotten a lot more than what they got if they had allowed you to be in that authority to position where you could lead and direct them things would have turned out far better for them I mean that's why they tried to do it in the first place they wanted to be around a powerful person but then if you look at it without the lies, the manipulation, the future faking once you take all of that away you wouldn't have wanted anything to do with them anyway because you would have realised that there's nothing in it for you and that's why they hold on to this position of power and authority so strongly because otherwise you're going to quickly realise that you're far better off on your own without them and I've seen it myself in my own life when I've dealt with Narcissus if I had just left them alone if I had realised what I was dealing with from the very beginning I would have been far better off but this is why they do what they do this is why they lie to us they manipulate us especially the men who are watching this right now there's one thing these narcissistic women do not want and do not like this is your masculine energy and I don't mean you just got to go around being a jerk to everyone but it has nothing to do with masculinity at all masculinity is about being a leader it's authority but it is also having empathy and compassion they wanted your empathy and compassion they did not want you to hold that authority of position over them they wanted to take control of you so that they could use you for their benefit and they thought they were getting something by doing that but if you look at it all they got was the crumbs they could have got so much more of you I mean just look back and see everything that you built with your life everything that you achieved and accomplished before they came around and imagine how much more you could have done if you continued in that position of authority and control over your own life you could have done so much more and if they just accepted their position as your subordinate they would have had everything laid out farther but that's the thing again it's that they never would have done that to begin with because then they would have realized or rather you would have realized that there's nothing in it for you anyway you wouldn't get any value out of it it wouldn't do anything for you by keeping them around and they already know that and that's why when you do realize your true power your true value from that point on narcissists they're not even going to get a foot in the door with you that's Ross Rosenberg the psychologist and the author of the Human Magnet Syndrome has said your greatest defense against a narcissist is your self love and that will make them run off faster than you saying bolt when you love yourself they do not want to be around anyone who loves and accepts themselves and we can see that by what they do to us as soon as they get a foot in the door what do they do they devalue us they start making us doubt ourselves because your self love is your greatest defense and knowing this you should know that whatever they're moving on to their new supply they're just with someone who does not love or accept themselves that's the only way that they can be together and a person who does not love and accept themselves that's just the type of person that they have to seek out so that they can maintain control because they can't do that with you anymore and you may have loved and accepted yourself in the beginning but then they went to the devaluation because they couldn't exist around you in that state because they do not love or accept themselves that's why they never took accountability for their actions and this is how you know that yes they are disconnected from self ourselves are true selves that's not just all the good things that we do our positive characteristics no it's the bad things we do as well it's our faults and mistakes our flaws and imperfections yes we must own these things too and we must try to improve on them but narcissists run away from that they run away from themselves because they do not love or accept themselves and that's why they can't tolerate your self love and your acceptance of yourself because then that means that they need to love and accept themselves but your self love it triggers them it just resurfaces their insecurities so that's why everything they do it's all about managing your self esteem they're trying to take from you what they don't possess themselves so you want to make a narcissist run off faster than Usain Bolt this is all that you have to do love and accept yourself and if you do that automatically you will no longer be susceptible to their manipulation because when you love and accept yourself you expect other people to love and accept themselves and as I said it's not just about the good things we do or our positive characteristics as with narcissists they're also arrogant and grandiose in their minds they believe that they are perfect that's not really who we are it involves accepting our faults and mistakes our flaws and imperfections our negative characteristics and traits and that's what we always do it's why it's so easy for them to devalue us and then we self loathe because unlike them we are not running from ourselves we accept ourselves even things that may not be good or positive about us we accept that too and that's how they manage to get in and manipulate us and keep us down where they can be in a position of control but when you start to wake up and you start loving yourself again then they can't be around you anymore they can't be around a person who is real and authentic and real and authentic means accepting not only the things you've done right not only the good things about you but also the things that you have done wrong the bad things about yourself as well this is how you know when they run off faster than you see in Bolt like they're doing a hundred meter sprint what they're running off to it's not even real and who they are is not even real and their new supply is not even real as well because the narcissist does not love or accept themselves that's where they ran away from you and they didn't take accountability for their actions and for them to be able to be around their new supply their new supply must not love or accept themselves as well and that also includes everyone in their smear campaign the enablers and flying monkeys none of them love or accept themselves which means that none of them are even real because they don't accept anything that they do anything bad or wrong any negative characteristic any fault or mistake, flaw or imperfection all fake people none of them are real and they're running away from you not because anything's wrong with you or because you're not good enough as they make it out to be they're running from you because you are real and that's where they can't stand they can't stand anything real and what is real, they know that you are real sometimes when they devalue you they put you down they got you to identify with real or imagined things that you did wrong what's more real than that what is more real than someone who takes the blame they take accountability they self-loathe you know what's not real it's having this big wall of yourself where you have to act like you're perfect and you don't do anything wrong and there's nothing bad about you as though you've done anything right and there's nothing that you need to correct there is nothing more fake than that everything they have it is all a lie it's all a facade it is not real what you have is real and that is why people like ourselves people who are actually real you may find you don't really like being around large crowds you don't like being around all of these big events these family gatherings whether it's Christmas or birthdays these fake holidays like Valentine's Day you're not really into all of that because you know it's all garbage it's all fake it's all a show it's all a false image the very things that narcissists gravitate towards just makes us sick because we know it's all a facade all of these things they do all of these things that they engage in it's all fake and it's all intended to manipulate you there's a lot of things in this world today it's all just to make people fake to make people not who they really are to make people less and less like themselves so hold on to your truth hold on to your reality hold on to who you really are because I can tell you that there are a lot of people in this world but very few of them are actually real because as I said what is a real person what is the definition of someone who is real it's someone who accepts their past they accept everything about themselves good and bad their achievements but then also their faults and mistakes narcissists they just want to live a fake life with fake people they don't want to be around anything real when you start being real and you start loving and accepting yourself when you start doing that they will run off faster than you seem bolt but they're not really running from you they're running from the fact that they do not love or accept themselves that's what they're running away from and they're running off to people who will accept the fake version of them because the real version of who they are is not only the positive things but the negative things as well it's about taking accountability but they're running away from that they don't want anything to do with it so they're running from themselves that's what they're running away from nothing succeeds in that because if you want to experience success, happiness, peace these things all come from us loving and accepting ourselves the very things that they are running away from their entire life is just a fantasy it's not even real and in order for you to even communicate with them you have to enter their fantasy world you have to accept that nothing is wrong with them that they're perfect that they can't do anything wrong but by doing that when anyone does that they are not loving or accepting themselves so these are the types of people that the narcissist surrounds themselves with and their alternate reality, their fake worlds people who do not love or accept themselves and people like us, people who desire to take accountability we find these communities and many of us we begin to isolate ourselves we don't spend too much time around other people because we realise that this world is very fake it's just full of people who just they run away from situations in their lives they don't want to own up to things they don't want to take accountability they're just shame based people doing everything they can to avoid reflecting on their shame when what you should do, if you want to be better in life the very thing you should do is confront whatever it is that you are running away from if you want to be better, if you want to experience real happiness real peace whatever you're running away from you need to do a 180 and run right back and you need to take accountability in that situation maybe the other person won't let you maybe it's not possible for whatever reason but you need to exhaust every possible option so at least you can say that you did your best because that is what it means to love and accept yourself and you cannot love anyone else until you do that so this is all that they're doing when you see them run off they're just running away from themselves they're running off to live a fake life with fake people and the longer their situation or relationship is whatever it is that they have the more fake that those people are because a real person they're just not even going to be able to be around them they're not going to be able to deal with that when you love and accept yourself you can only be around people who love and accept themselves as well so this is it this is what you have to do to make the narcissist run off faster than you seem bolt because this is what they're running away from it may look like they're running from you but they're actually running from themselves true authenticity comes from accountability from owning up to the things that we have done wrong and then responding to the best of our ability if you're finding this video helpful remember to give it a thumbs up down below it will help to get this message out there to other victims as well so it's very important to do that but yeah this is how we know that they are living a fake life a fake existence and this is why they can never be happy because they're shame based people doing everything they can to avoid reflecting on their shame many of us may be able to relate to that I know I can in my past what I did some things wrong and I didn't want to own up to it and I used to wonder why am I always so angry why am I always so miserable even when I have good things going on in my life and I started to realise that I'm running away from certain things I'm not really being myself I'm not being authentic I'm not living a true existence because I'm denying certain parts of myself running away from the shame instead of confronting it something that a narcissist is never going to do they're always going to deflect it they're always going to shift the blame they're never going to own up to it and that's why they'll always be miserable in their lives it doesn't matter what they have or how much they have it doesn't matter who they're with they're never going to be satisfied with anything I can promise you that because they would have to confront their shame the very thing that is weighing them down but if they were to do that instantly they would feel compelled to make things right with you they would do everything in their power to correct that but they don't because they don't confront their shame and that's why they're always so miserable it's why they're always so mad it's why they're always so envious of your situation and of you trying to move on it's all because of their shame and they know that unlike them we do have the ability to confront our shame they know that we can deal with it and we can move on and be happy that's why they've got to pile all of this onto us and try to weigh us down with responsibility things that we're not even responsible for things that they did wrong things that they didn't own up to to try to prevent us from moving on and living a life that they can't experience in a sense of happiness and fulfillment that they will never get to experience because they can't own up to their shame it's our shame it belongs to us it's a part of who we are when we deny these things we live a fake life a false existence we're not really being ourselves we can't really develop anything authentic with anyone this is what they do and when you're being real and you expect them to own up to something and they run off faster than you saying bolt they're running away because you're real you're being real you're loving and accepting yourself you're taking accountability for the things that you've done wrong in your life but they don't want to do that they'd rather run off and be fake without even realizing that that is the cause to their demise and it's the reason why they will never be happy with anything they will never be satisfied and that's why so that is my message for tonight let me know what you think down in the live chat below I will read it out and respond to it I have noticed quite a few strange comments in the live chat as I was delivering this message I had to hide it a few people one person saying I look like Eminem and then some other trolls hello rad bro RioAsianGaming says his eyebrows look good should I subscribe I don't know whether to take that seriously or not SaswatiPramatic says are you BTS army a lot of random comparisons here already someone that says I look like Eminem again as you probably noticed I do often get some very strange comments in the live chat when I am delivering these messages I think it's typically just to distract me because it really just goes back to what I said I mean a lot of people are living a fake life they are fake people they don't want to take accountability they don't want to respond to the best of their ability they don't want to accept their faults and mistakes their flaws and imperfections and they just can't stand anything real if it's real they want to keep it down or they want to run away from it but in actuality they are just trying to destroy or run away from their authentic selves if they even have that anymore I'm sure many of them discard about a long time ago but I'm sure as many of you are here that is not what I intend to do I accept both the good and bad parts of myself I accept my positive but also my negative characteristics as well I accept my faults and mistakes I accept my flaws and imperfections and I want to use them to become the greatest version of myself which is something I've been doing for many years now and I will continue to do it those of you who subscribe to that you're very welcome here anyone else you're on the wrong channel if you want to deny the truth, reality you need to go somewhere else Trude VW says Christopher has that glow like all super empaths do we literally glow that's very true and I'm not just reading that out just blow up my own ego it's more because it just reminds me of my own personal experiences with other empaths they really do have a glow and you can just see that glitter in their eyes you can see that they see you they recognise you as a separate person with your own feelings and needs yes, that is the glow that you will see in other empaths Warren Jefferson, you are very welcome I'm glad that you're finding this advice helpful there's always a lot of trolls in the comments but that's just how it is they gravitate to empathic people and why? because we care we feel we feel another person's emotions as if they were our own and believe it or not but there is actually very rare in today's world from my research only 1-2% of the world's population are empaths people who can feel and share another person's feelings and experience yes, that is actually a very rare trait in today's world so many trolls in the live chat today I'm sure you can all see all these weird comments but that's how it goes when you start becoming successful you will attract a lot of haters a lot of people who oppose you especially when you're speaking the truth because most people in this world do not want the truth they do not want reality but people like ourselves we can't help it we desire truth we desire love and that is acceptance not only of the good but also the bad narcissists just want to deny or run away from all of that and just live a false existence empaths we may try to do that but it just feels so uncomfortable to us I would like to stay longer on here but unfortunately my battery is very low I think it's only 3% now but I hope I've given you enough information in this message tonight being on here about an hour and if you would like to show your support you can do that right now down below by giving this video a thumbs up and let me know your thoughts about this video in the comment section below I do read your comments every day and you're going to hit that subscribe button and click the bell icon so that you will receive notifications for my future videos I'm also available for a one-on-one which you can book on my website it is NarcSurvivor.co.uk and you can follow me on Instagram and send me a message on there it's NarcSurvivor YouTube I'm also uploading new pictures and videos of my travels on there as well so definitely check it out NarcSurvivor YouTube and Instagram that's all I've got to say for this video but I'd just like to thank you all for joining me as always I do appreciate your support and I look forward to talking with you in another video very soon you all have a great day