 Hello everyone Welcome to another NARC's Firelight video again. I've just been driving for a few hours And I've arrived at this other city There is actually a really nice view from here But I just started raining now So I can't really show it Hopefully tomorrow. I'll be able to show it to you. I'll just close this door now I know it's quite a bit of noise But yes, let's talk about it There is one thing That you need to start accepting about the narcissist because you've dealt with them for some time and Sometimes it seems like they can be kind they can be sweet They may seem very loving They can even be generous at times And then other times they're devaluing you they're putting you down they're insulting you They want to make you feel like you're nothing and they're just using you like a toy They're putting you down to make themselves feel better and at some point you've got to Realize if someone loves you and cares about you Why would they go and do that? I mean yes, sometimes they may be nice to you But then other times they're devaluing you They're hurting you Because the truth is Of course, I've been doing this for a long time. I Can tell you I know But any narcissist Anyone who is narcissistic The reason why they become that way to begin with It's because they actually really hate you They completely despise you and it's not just you It's pretty much everyone Even those who seem to be They're flying monkeys. They're enablers People who act on their behalf As I've said before they hate Everyone they hate all people No matter what you do for them how much of yourself you give to them That just makes them hate you even more The more time you spend around them the more your value goes down and then they begin to despise you They become very bitter and resentful towards you Because in their minds, it's unfair Very envious and jealous and they just Look at you and they just can't stand you being you and this is not just in relationships You may notice it with children of the narcissist as well Typically when they start going through puberty And they begin to develop their own individual self The narcissist just can't stand any form of individuality Any authenticity Anything that is separate from them anything that is outside of their control and it's just everything about you The things that make you you The things that make you special If you spend enough time around them, they will kill Everything about you that makes you special and unique That makes you different and these are the things that If I met you if we spend some time together These could be things that I might love or appreciate about you And not just me but any normal person would Things like the way you walk The way you speak The way that you choose the style your hair the type of clothes that you choose to wear Just you being your natural authentic self They absolutely despise it In you and everyone else Everyone they get around has to think and feel exactly as they do Which is why you will notice whenever there's a special occasion It could be a birthday or Christmas They've always got to ruin it They've always got to destroy that occasion They've got to be opposed to it They've got to go against it and they always have to control the vibe The moods other people's emotions If you've ever lived with a narcissist you will know If they're not happy no one can be happy But then if they're having a good day And they might have done something wrong to you It doesn't matter They expect you to be happy as well. And of course, yes, this is just crazy But this is what they demand and expect from you. You can't just be your authentic self You can't be Who you want to be Whatever you try to be they will always try to go against it They will never accept it. You are not allowed to be your true authentic self You're not allowed to think or feel whatever you want to think or feel You're not allowed to do what you want to do. And this is everywhere in the world today Just look around at the world Everyone is beginning to Think Act and behave the same Everyone's eating the same types of foods But we're in the same style of clothes They're just doing all of the same things It's like no one is allowed to have their own identity Their own individuality Everyone is expected to conform and be the same and I'm sure of course The reason for this is because This world is led by narcissistic and Psychopathic people and the last thing they want is for you to find your own power in your true authentic self That is the last thing that they want you to do and yet many of us we look at this world and we think No The government cares about us They wanted to protect us from COVID From all of these things That just seemed to keep going wrong all they want is for everyone to conform They want to put everyone in a group Where everyone is the same Because then it is so much easier for them to control you They do not want you to think for yourself They want to strip you of your own free will of your freedom to make your own choices and decisions and Instead they want to turn you into an extension of them Where you're under their control They're the puppet master and they can pull the strings They can just make you do whatever they want you to do Which if you've been around them long enough you will know that yes, that is exactly What they will make you do Eventually you will conform You will lose yourself And by the end of it you won't even recognize yourself You won't even know who you are anymore Which is of course very damaging. It's damaging to your mind. It's damaging to your self-esteem It changes who you are at a core level because just look back Look back for the time that you have spent with them Look back at certain moments or situations and you will know for a fact Yes, there were certain times Where if the narcissist was not present if they were not there You would have made a different choice or decision Just as you may have made different choices and decisions in the past So that means that you are different now That means that you have changed That means that you have been stripped of your free will it's changed your identity You are not the same person as you were before Which is of course exactly what they want to do to you They want everyone to conform. They want everyone to be the same They don't want you to think for yourself. They don't want you to make your own choices and decisions Just seeing in the live chat. There are a lot of trolls. I've already hidden three people already People definitely don't like it when I talk about these types of things But I'm going to continue to do it because I know There are a lot of people out there who want to hear this but of course narcissists do not want you to know about this But it is something that you need to accept Just think about this for a moment If they liked you Who you are as a person If they valued you If your true identity or characteristics meant anything to them then why Would they Try to control you and I don't mean in a way where they're just trying to Protect your safety This goes outside of that They are trying to get you to conform to something where It changes the choices and decisions that you would otherwise make Choices and decisions that you may have made in the past and you were perfectly safe then And actually you may look back and realize that you were a lot happier before you got involved with them So what's happening to you? Why are you not happy anymore? If you've got this person in your life who is meant to be protecting you They're meant to be there for you So why are you not happy anymore? If someone really loves and cares for you How would you end up finding my videos? Everything you see from them It's all a lie, but sometimes they can see that you're detaching You're starting to wake up from the illusion And they notice that and instantly they sense your energy shift and they come back to love bomb you They come back They can pretend to be attentive concerned They give you these fake smiles as though they actually Care about you The reality is they do not even see you They can't even view you as a real person You are just an object You're a tool and appliance The only thing any narcissistic person in this world cares about And keep in mind that potentially over 50 percent of the population are narcissistic And aside from that there's also other cluster B disorders I've even seen a statistic that says that 96 percent of families in the world that is functional And these people who are narcissistic They can only see people as objects They cannot connect to you And yet we wonder why there is this epidemic of loneliness And that does not mean that people are completely alone Many people are in relationships Many people are families Yet at the same time Anxiety and depression are two of the most common illnesses in this world The most common illnesses are not even something physical They're mental illnesses or disorders Or it's anxiety or depression So something is seriously wrong with this world And not only that but people are addicted to social media Or maybe video games as well So why is this happening? And of course the reason why is because A lot of people in this world Do not even view other people as real people They see you as an object Just think about this even outside of the narcissists that you were dealing with When was the last time in your life That you felt like anyone actually listened to you When someone actually saw you When someone looked into your eyes and knew that you were there When was the last time that you actually had that experience Have you ever experienced that in your life? Because if you did experience it, you would know it Because that would be a very different experience to anything else The sad truth is most people in this world Do not care about you They're only focused on themselves They are self-absorbed They do not care about anything about you Other than how it pertains to them How it affects their reality Which yes is separate to yours It's not the same reality because you're not connected And a lot of people in this world do not know how to connect Without changing the other person This is why we look around in this world today and everyone seems to be the same They all do the same things They wear the same clothes, they eat the same foods They listen to the same types of music So what is going on? I can tell you that if someone loves you And I mean for real they really Love you, they love people They are going to want you to embrace your authentic self They are not going to try to turn you into something else They're not going to try to brainwash or indoctrinate you And to believe in things that they want you to believe Especially in situations where they haven't even done any research Or they don't have any experience Someone who loves and cares about you They will want you to think for yourself They will want you to make your own choices and decisions so that you can learn Because we all make mistakes, sometimes we do things wrong But we need to have these opportunities so that we can learn from our mistakes But you won't get that from the narcissist They will lead you the wrong way and then they will blame you They will keep you stuck in a relationship Making you believe that you're doing the right thing You've made the right decision They will lie to you, they will future fake They will promise you that it's going to get better And you could be with them for years Decades But by the end of it all they're going to do is blame you for everything They're going to say that it was all your fault Even though you were under their influence You were under their control the entire time And you could have remained loyal and devoted to them for years In the end they will still blame you You will be held accountable for that And I'm saying this now so that you can wake up And realize that yes, you are being deceived You are being cheated You are being robbed of your life You are wasting your life away with this person They are never going to love you They are never going to care about you They are never even going to see who you actually are Many of them don't even have the ability to do that They lack empathy And without empathy you cannot connect And you will know that they lack empathy Just look at all of the things you've been through with them All of the things that affected you Were they ever there for you? Did they ever care about you? That is how you know that they lack empathy And that they have an inability to connect Or even see you as a real separate person And if they can't see you as a real separate person They're not going to see anyone else You can't just pick and choose what you see You either see everything or you see nothing You can't pick and choose if you really do have empathy And of course that is why it's so easy for the narcissist Even after the years of abuse that we may have endured Despite all of that we could do one thing wrong Or they could gaslight us and make us believe that we've done something wrong And then they can instantly trigger our guilt and shame To where we feel sorry for the abuser Who's been abusing us for years So there's your proof right there If you have empathy You can't pick and choose who you feel for Which means that even if they discard you and they move on to another situation They don't care about that person as well They don't even see them, they don't even know that they exist They don't feel anything for them Again it's just another object and another tool and another appliance And that is all that it's ever going to be So yes, this is something that you need to accept This is reality Because a lot of you have been brainwashed for such a long time You actually think that at times this person likes you, this person sees you This person cares about you But the reality is that they don't They don't care about anyone, they don't even care about themselves They don't even know that they exist They don't even see themselves Everyone Every living thing in this world Is just an object to narcissistic people And keep in mind that potentially over 50% of people in this world are narcissistic And you can't truly share another person's feelings or experience Unless you have empathy Unless you are an empath And of course as we know empaths are very rare So yes, I do advise being very careful When you are dealing with these types of people, narcissists And even when you leave them, you go into contact, you move on You still have to be very cautious Because as I've said The majority of people in this world are dysfunctional I saw a statistic on that And there are many reports that show Just how many people in this world have mental illnesses, personality disorders They are actually very common And I wouldn't want you to get stuck in another relationship Where the other person doesn't even see you They don't even know that you're there You deserve so much better than that And I think we all do After everything we've been through with narcissists All of the abuse, the gaslighting Of course we deserve someone who actually cares And that is what I want for you It all starts by you seeing yourself Self-reflection Remembering who you are Remembering your own thoughts, your own feelings, your own ideas and perception If you feel like you're thinking and feeling exactly the same as everyone else You are not being yourself And if you can't even see yourself How is anyone else going to be able to see you? It just perpetuates disconnection It all starts by you Recognizing your own individuality Then you will be able to connect And then other people Mainly empaths They will be able to recognize you And then you will be able to experience a true connection Then you will know what that feels like Because I'm sure many of you for such a long time You have felt alone You've felt unwanted As though no one cares about you And that's just it Many people are in relationships And they are families And yet they still feel alone They still feel lonely They feel unheared, unseen They feel like no one cares about them And when you're with someone who is narcissistic They don't even see you They only give any attention to your feelings As how it pertains to them And how they want to feel about themselves They do not care about how you feel about you They never have They never will They will never even possess the ability to even do that So yes Something to be aware of And I know I can understand this is something that A lot of people may not want to hear It may be something you don't even want to think about But if you're not even thinking about it You are living a lie You're living in a delusion Where you think that someone cares about you When in reality they don't And that's just what I want for you Is to experience something real Because I felt that myself I think very few times in my life Have I actually experienced anything real I'm able to give something real very easily It comes naturally to me as an empath But I think quite possibly the first time I ever experienced something real Was probably in the last year Of a van on YouTube, of course When I read your comments every day It's a real experience for me And I hope when you watch my videos I've been doing this for over five years now And I hope that it feels real for you Because for me, yes, I genuinely do care About people in the world And I just love everything I love animals I love my cat, Nala I love people in general And I want the best for everyone But when you're around a narcissist For a long period of time You will feel like you're beginning to hate yourself They will turn you against yourself And eventually they may even turn you against everyone else To where you just want to be alone You become paranoid You become very distrustful So be very careful Limit your time around them Don't get too involved Don't participate Any type of abuse Is going to be self-destructive On a person's identity Individuality and sense of self Not only for the victim but also for the abuser as well Whenever you engage in anything harmful or destructive It just pulls you further and further away from yourself I know this is a deep video But it is a very important message And it's something that I really needed to drive home I hope this is something that you will watch Again, not just one time To really let it sink into your mind It looks like the clouds have cleared a bit out here Let's take another look at this view Vietnamese architecture In mountain, in the distance And over there there's the beach I'm hoping the weather will be better tomorrow Then I can go out and explore Maybe I'll do a video outside somewhere as well If I can find somewhere quiet But yeah, this is my room This is where I'm going to be sleeping Tonight, I'm taking a shower here before I go to sleep And then I wake up in the morning I sit down here to do my videos Actually, I think I will work on a video tonight Before I go to sleep I'm just really enjoying putting out this new content My videos are getting much more deeper recently And a lot longer as well Which is really good, I'm really proud of it Because I know for a while I did get quite caught up in meaningless things It was taking up a lot of my time And I couldn't spend too much time on my work But now I have more time In the evenings I just like to sit down Or lay down rather on the bed Do some research and write up a video But yes, just be very careful When you're around these narcissists Remember they are living in denial And they will gas like you And every time they do that Every time they manipulate you or gas like you They get you to question your own memory, perception and sanity You are becoming less and less like your true authentic self You are becoming invisible To yourself Because you are already invisible to the narcissist They don't even see you You're just a tool, an object, an appliance And when you're constantly around someone And you're under their influence and control And they don't even see you How are you ever going to see yourself? Because if you're around other people They need to be able to reflect back to you Who you are and who you are being When you're alone it's fine I mean you should be able to reflect back To yourself who you are But when you're around other people Especially those who are narcissistic You're under their influence and control And they don't even see you Over time you're just becoming an object It's a raise in your identity So be very careful Avoid any unnecessary engagement with them At all costs It's very damaging to you And actually, yes, it is also very damaging to themselves But yes, that's it, that's what I wanted to say Something that we all need to accept About narcissists But narcissistic people And I do hope that this video has been helpful to you If it was, you can show your support By giving it a thumbs up down below Let me know your thoughts in the comment section as well I read your comments every day And yeah, that's it That's the message Thank you all And you all have a great day