 Hello there my beautiful lovely internet friends. I did not expect today's video to be emotional but I have a feeling it's gonna be considering I've already welled up with tears a couple times on the car right over. So here's what's happening. I have been going to a pain management doctor for the past it's over a decade. The past nine years I was on opiate based painkillers like Oxycontin and Vicodin and just all different kinds of things to manage the pain that I've been in every day from neck issues and migraines and the ankle issues I had and amputation and all of that and if you didn't see my video about getting off of opioids I'll link it somewhere up there. I decided this year that I was going to try to come off them and see what happened and it was a process but last week I stopped taking them completely after slowly weaning off of them and I've had like a week without having to carry around those drugs everywhere. Like when I like the first day without it I was like oh this is so cool this is awesome this is great like I'm feeling okay that like I'm all right and now I'm like driving here thinking that it could be the last time that I have to do this because when you're with a pain management doctor you're supposed to go in and check with them you know once every month to make sure things are good that you're using your medication correctly it doesn't need to be adjusted you know other recommendations for things you could try things like that and I've made the drive over here like every day as long as I've lived in Colorado since I was like 17 or 18 and this could actually be the last time that I have to go talk to them and I cannot freaking wait to tell my doctor that I'm breaking up with her in the best possible way yeah I really didn't expect to be emotional or get ulterioried but hey it's where we are I'm gonna I'm gonna go ahead and head in and then tell you guys a little bit more after um also today's video is sponsored by a perfect sponsor for today's video a bridge I'm gonna tell you a little bit more about them in a moment as well but first I'm gonna go tell my doctor some really freaking cool news like I'm really I'm really proud of myself this was not easy to do and it probably still won't be easy to do it'll probably still be a bit of a journey I just I never thought I'd be here literally ever and this is really cool I almost thought the world was normal there for a second and forgot to bring my mask because I took out from my car but thankfully I remembered before I actually got to the building let's do this walked out of that doctor's appointment maybe for the last time ever oh my god I wish I could like actually show you my face and how happy and excited I am but masks first like the coolness of all of this has finally hit me and the like I don't know what I feel like is the accomplishment of it because that was freaking hard to do and uh it's gonna take work to kind of keep the pain under control still and stay active and stretch and rest and eat right and all the stuff that I need to do I mean I'm still gonna hurt I'm still gonna get migraines a lot but I'm finding different ways to control them and perhaps better ways for me and and my life and my body so in that doctor's appointment today I used one of my favorite apps that I really really love recommending on this channel and that's called a bridge a bridge is an app that allows you to record your medical conversations and it gives you active feedback on what was said it picks up on medical terminology sometimes I find I have a lot of difficulty remembering what happened in doctor's appointments and exactly what was said and what was the thing that they talked about and what's the possible diagnosis I don't remember that word it was a weird medical term and a bridge actually picks up on all that for you it points out important moments and medical words that you might want to remember and there's a brand new feature that they added since I talked to you guys about them last time where if a medicine is mentioned as you're going back through the log of your appointment it'll point that term out it'll give you a brief definition and it'll also point you towards any coupons on good rx if they exist which is really cool and really helpful for a lot of us so check it out right here this is how it functions when you say a medical term like oxycodone it'll pick up on it it'll show that it'll highlight it and highlighted moments which are the moments that its analytics to term are important it's also just a really easy app to use which I appreciate you pull up you hit record and you're good to go there aren't a ton of hoops or steps to jump through I honestly highly recommend using a bridge it's been really helpful to me and my family it's an app I actually use so thank you bridge for partnering with me you can check out the link down below to download the app today it's totally free and like I said I definitely think you should do it because it's been pretty helpful for me okay so I just made it back home made myself a celebratory cup of coffee because of course so I went into detail about this in the other video that I did but I have been on prescription medications for pain since I was I think it was 17 and at 20 I transitioned to narcotic based painkillers I was on Vicodin for a really long time then I was on oxy for a really long time like that was going to be the rest of my life it affected decisions about where we were going to move if we ever move because I had to find a good pain management doctor in the area and what if I couldn't find one what if I couldn't get my medication like oh my god that would be horrible I wouldn't be able to like exist I wouldn't be able to function and there's the financial burden of it too right now my insurance was covering most of the pain medication I had to have but it still costs something and on top of that I also always had this like looming concern of like what if they stopped covering it because they'd stopped covering other medications for me before in different circumstances and there's so many underlying anxieties going out and doing anything whether it was like seeing our friends for dinner or hanging out with someone or just going for a drive I always had to make sure I had my medication with me because I would need it and if I didn't have it that was a crap day I'd have to turn back from things I was going to to make sure that I had it with me in case the pain got really bad like there's so many little aspects now that I don't have to think about I don't have to think about getting time off work like taking time out of my day to drive 30 minutes to go see my doctor talk for five minutes to get another prescription to then drive that prescription by hand to the pharmacy to then wait and like pick it up and making sure that those appointments were scheduled the right time so that I didn't run out out in between and I had this real concern of like what if it gets totally cut off like how am I going to be able to exist we were getting ready to go drive the other day because Brian and I have been doing a lot of just like driving and listening to good music and podcasts and stuff like that to pass the time and I had this thought in my head like oh I need to make sure I have enough medication in my bag and then I was like no I don't I don't actually have to do that anymore there's so much freedom in this and I think I'm just sort of now starting to realize the depth of that and also I think god I'm I don't want to say this at the risk of sounding like a horribly cheesy motivational speaker so please forgive me that's how it comes across but I'm so glad that I questioned my beliefs about myself and reality because that's kind of hard to do when you've lived so long believing a certain thing it's really hard to change directions even question if that thing was true and for me that thing was I will always be on higher and higher doses of pain medication and it will probably kill me young or at least that was like the fear that was the belief I had in my head whether or not that was accurate and as uncomfortable as life was living like that it does become comfortable to accept so sometimes you have to accept things because they are your life they are reality but I got this idea back in January that I had not questioned that belief about myself and what I was putting into my body for a really long time I had just come to accept it as the facts and I'd always be looking for other options to help keep the pain down more but this is just how my life was going to be this I was always going to be always having this underlying anxiety and I want to pause real quick and say that I know that there are people watching this video who are still on pain medication every day who maybe will always be on it I realize how privileged I am to be able to make this video to be able to come off of medication and for it to be at a level where I'm able to deal with it in other ways at least at this point I know that's not the case for everyone I am so grateful that I'm able to do this but on the other hand I recognize that this is not a possibility for a lot of people and all of like the fears and anxieties I'm talking about I know you've probably felt as well of all the things that I have done in my life this goes on the list of things that I'm honestly proud of because for me in my situation it was simpler to stay on medication and not try anything else not try to get off of it because it becomes the status quo it becomes just how your life is and my life needed to be like that for a while let me stress that but I just got to this point of realizing that I hadn't reevaluated if that's still what my body needed if my pain levels were still at a point where that medication was even being effective anymore and it was so cool to walk into that office and celebrate with my doctor and I'm just really happy and a little emotional and now I need to sip on my coffee thank you for being excited with me your response on my video about coming off of opioids was just so fantastic and thank you for being a part of this journey with me I was so excited to share this with you guys because you've been with me through oh so many fun up and down uh medical adventures shall we call them and this is one that right now feels like it has a very cool ending to that chapter I want to stress really heavily there's not a darn thing wrong in the world with taking medication that's prescribed to you like if people need it it's necessary there's no shame in that I didn't feel shame internally from it I definitely felt shame externally from people judging me for being on pain medication which is a conversation for another time but this is an issue I'm always gonna care about I'm always gonna advocate for thanks thanks for listening thanks for coming to this appointment with me today I don't know this has just been a cool day real quick as we close out that was like a very pastor thing to do as we close out today ladies and gentlemen I want to thank our sponsor again a bridge I absolutely love that app I use it every medical appointment I go to it is very helpful for remembering things especially if no one can come with you to a doctor's appointment oftentimes I'll try to bring someone so they can like help me remember things in the heat of the moment and understanding things but that's not always the case and even if that is the case it's always better to have a recording than not so check out that link down below I would highly recommend downloading it it has my full stamp of approval and I'm really excited to be working with the bridge so thank you guys for sponsoring this and thank you to my patrons for continuing to make these videos possible I've been working for a while to make income on YouTube sustainable I'm a little ways from it still which is perfectly fine but you guys have helped me bridge that gap so much and I can never express to you how grateful I am for your generosity and support so thank you patrons and to you watching this video right now thank you for spending a few minutes out of your day here with me today hearing about my little life it means the world to me you could be anywhere in the world doing anything and you chose to chat with me for a few minutes so thank you I love you guys I'm thinking about you and I will see you in the next video bye guys