 Chapter 12 of Dombie and Son. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. Recording by Cynthia Lyons. Dombie and Son by Charles Dickens. Chapter 12, Paul's Education. After the lapse of some minutes, which appeared an immense time to little Paul Dombie on the table, Dr. Blimber came back. The doctor's walk was stately and calculated to impress the juvenile mind with solemn feelings. It was a sort of march, but when the doctor put out his right foot, he gravely turned upon his axis with a semicircular sweep towards the left, and when he put out his left foot, he turned in the same manner towards the right, so that he seemed at every stride he took to look about him as though he were saying, can anybody have the goodness to indicate any subject in any direction on which I am uninformed? I rather think not. Mrs. Blimber and Ms. Blimber came back in the doctor's company, and the doctor, lifting his new pupil off the table, delivered him over to Ms. Blimber. Cornelia said the doctor, Dombie, will you be your charge at first? Bring him on, Cornelia. Bring him on. Ms. Blimber received her young ward from the doctor's hands, and Paul, feeling that the spectacles were surveying him, cast down his eyes. How old are you, Dombie? said Ms. Blimber. Six, answered Paul, wondering, as he stole a glance at the young lady, why her hair didn't grow long like Florence's, and why she was like a boy. How much do you know of your Latin grammar, Dombie? said Ms. Blimber. None of it, answered Paul. Feeling that the answer was a shock to Ms. Blimber's sensibility, he looked up at the three faces that were looking down at him and said, I haven't been well. I have been a weak child. I couldn't learn a Latin grammar when I was out every day with Old Glob. I wish you tell Old Glob to come in and see me, if you please. What a dreadful low name, said Ms. Blimber. Unclassical to a degree. Who is the monster, child? What monster, inquired Paul? Glob, said Ms. Blimber, with a great disrelish. He's no more a monster than you are, returned Paul. What, cried the doctor, in a terrible voice. Aye, aye, aye, aha, what's that? Paul was dreadfully frightened, but still he made a stand for the absent Glob, though he did it trembling. He's a very nice old man, ma'am, he said. He used to draw my coach. He knows all about the deep sea and the fish that are in it and the great monsters that come and lie on rocks in the sun and dive into the water again when they're startled, blowing and splashing so that they can be heard for miles. There are some creatures, said Paul, warming with his subject. I don't know how many yards long, and I forget their names, but Florence knows that pretend to be in distress, and when a man goes near them out of compassion, they open their great jaws and attack him. But all he has got to do, said Paul, wholly tendering this information to the very doctor himself, is to keep on turning as he runs away, and then, as they turn slowly because they are so long and can't bend, he's sure to beat them. And though old Glob don't know why, the sea should make me think of ma'am, ma, that's dead, or what it is that is always saying, he knows a great deal about it. And I wish, the child concluded with a sudden falling of his countenance and falling in his animation, as he looked like one forlorn upon the three strange faces. That you'd let old Glob come here and see me, for I know him very well, and he knows me. Ha! said the doctor, shaking his head. This is bad, but study will do much. Mrs. Blimber opined with something like a shiver that he was an unaccountable child and allowing for the difference of visage looked at him pretty much as Mrs. Pipchin had used to do. Take him round the house, Cornelia, said the doctor, and familiarize him with his new sphere. Go with that young lady, Domby. Domby obeyed, giving his hand to the abstruse Cornelia and looking at her sideways with timid curiosity as they went away altogether. For her spectacles, by reason of the glistening of the glasses, made her so mysterious that he didn't know where she was looking and was not indeed quite sure that she had any eyes at all behind them. Cornelia took him first to the schoolroom, which was situated at the back of the hall and was approached through two bay's doors, which deadened and muffled the young gentleman's voices. Here there were eight young gentlemen in various stages of mental prostration, all very hard at work and very grave indeed. Toots, as an old hand, had a desk to himself in one corner and a magnificent man of immense age. He looked in Paul's young eyes behind it. Mr. Feeder, B.A., who sat at another little desk, had his Virgil stop on and was slowly grinding that tune to four young gentlemen. Of the remaining four, two who grasped their foreheads responsibly were engaged in solving mathematical problems. One with his face like a dirty window from much crying was endeavoring to flounder through a hopeless number of lines before dinner, and one sat looking at his task in stony stupefaction and despair, which it seemed had been his condition ever since breakfast time. The appearance of a new boy did not create the sensation that might have been expected. Mr. Feeder, B.A., who was in the habit of shaving his head for coolness and had nothing but little bristles on it, gave him a bony hand and told him he was glad to see him, which Paul would have been very glad to have told him if he could have done so with the least sincerity. Then Paul, instructed by Cornelia, shook hands with the four young gentlemen at Mr. Feeder's desk, then with the two young gentlemen at work on the problems, who were very feverish, then with the gentlemen at work against time, who was very inky, and lastly with the young gentlemen in a state of stupefaction, who was flabby and quite cold. Paul, having been already introduced to Toots, that pupil merely chuckled and breathed hard, as his custom was, and pursued the occupation in which he was engaged. It was not a severe one, for on account of his having gone through so much, in more senses than one, and also of his having, as before hinted, left off blowing in his prime, Toots now had license to pursue his own course of study, which was chiefly to write long letters to himself from persons of distinction, addressed P. Toots, Esquire, Brighton, Sussex, and to preserve them in his desk with great care. These ceremonies passed, Cornelia led Paul upstairs to the top of the house. Which was rather a slow journey, on account of Paul being obliged to land both feet on every stair, before he mounted another. But they reached their journey's end at last, and there, in a front room, looking over the wild sea, Cornelia showed him a nice little bed with white hangings close to the window, on which there was already beautifully written on a card in round text, downstrokes very thick and upstrokes very fine, Dombie, while two other little bedsteads in the same room were announced through like-means, as respectively appertaining unto Briggs and Tozer. Just as they got downstairs again into the hall, Paul saw the weak-eyed young man, who had given the mortal offence to Mrs. Pipchin, suddenly sees a very large drumstick, and fly at a gong that was hanging up, as if he had gone mad or wanted vengeance. Instead of receiving warning, however, or being instantly taken into custody, the young man left off unchecked, after having made a dreadful noise. Then Cornelia Blimber said to Dombie that dinner would be ready in a quarter of an hour, and perhaps he had better go into the school room among his friends. So Dombie, deferentially passing the great clock, which was still as anxious as ever to know how he found himself, opened the school room door a very little way, and strayed in like a lost boy, shutting it after him with some difficulty. His friends were all dispersed about the room, except the stony friend, who remained immovable. Mr. Feeder was stretching himself in his grey gown, as if, regardless of expense, he were resolved to pull the sleeves off. Hey ho hum, cried Mr. Feeder, shaking himself like a cart horse. Oh dear me, dear me, yeah. Paul was quite alarmed by Mr. Feeder's yawning. It was done on such a great scale, and he was so terribly in earnest. All the boys too, toots accepted, seemed knocked up, and were getting ready for dinner. Some newly tying their neck-cloths, which were very stiff indeed, and others washing their hands or brushing their hair in an adjoining antechamber, as if they didn't think they should enjoy it at all. Young toots, who was ready beforehand and had therefore nothing to do, and had leisure to bestow upon Paul, said with heavy good nature, sit down, Domby. Thank you, sir, said Paul. His endeavouring to hoist himself onto a very high window seat, and his slipping down again, appeared to prepare toots' mind for the reception of a discovery. You're a very small chap, said Mr. Toots. Yes, sir, I am small, returned Paul. Thank you, sir. For Toots had lifted him into the seat, and done it kindly too. Who's your tailor, inquired Toots, after looking at him for some moments? It's a woman that has made my clothes as yet, said Paul, my sister's dressmaker. My tailor's Burgess and company, said Toots. Fashionable, but very dear. Paul had wit enough to shake his head, as if he would have said it was very easy to see that, and indeed he thought so. Your father's regularly rich, ain't he, inquired Mr. Toots. Yes, sir, said Paul. He's Domby and son. And which demanded Toots? And son, sir, replied Paul. Mr. Toots made one or two attempts in a low voice to fix the firm in his mind, but not quite succeeding, said he would get Paul to mention the name again tomorrow morning, as it was rather important. And indeed he proposed nothing less than writing himself a private and confidential letter from Domby and son immediately. By this time the other pupils, always accepting the stony boy, gathered round. They were polite, but pale, and spoke low, and they were so depressed in their spirits that in comparison with the general tone of that company, Master Bitherstone was a perfect miller, or complete jest book. And yet he had a sense of injury upon him, too, had Bitherstone. You sleep in my room, don't you? asked a solemn young gentleman whose shirt collar curled up the lobes of his ears. Master Briggs, inquired Paul. Tozer, said the young gentleman. Paul answered yes, and Tozer, pointing out the stony pupil, said that was Briggs. Paul had already felt certain that it must be either Briggs or Tozer, though he didn't know why. Is yours a strong constitution, inquired Tozer? Paul said he thought not. Tozer replied that he thought not, also judging from Paul's looks, and that it was a pity for it need be. He then asked Paul if he were going to begin with Cornelia, and on Paul saying yes, all the young gentlemen, Briggs accepted, and gave a low groan. It was drowned in the tintonapulation of the gong, which, sounding again with great fury, there was a gentle move towards the dining room, still accepting Briggs the stony boy, who remained where he was, and as he was, and on its way to whom Paul presently encountered a round of bread, gentilly served on a plate and napkin, and with a silver fork lying crosswise on the top of it. Dr. Blimber was already in his place in the dining room, at the top of the table, with Miss Blimber and Mrs. Blimber on either side of him. Mr. Feder in a black coat was at the bottom. Paul's chair was next to Miss Blimber, but it being found when he sat in it that his eyebrows were not much above the level of the tablecloth. Some books were brought in from the doctor's study, on which he was elevated, and on which he always sat from that time, carrying them in and out himself on after occasions, like a little elephant and castle. Grace, having been said by the doctor, dinner began. There was some nice soup, also roast meat, boiled meat, vegetables, pie, and cheese. Every young gentleman had a massive silver fork and a napkin, and all the arrangements were stately and handsome. In particular, there was a butler in a blue coat and bright buttons, who gave quite a whiny flavor to the table beer. He poured it out so superbly. Nobody spoke, unless spoken to, except Dr. Blimber, Mrs. Blimber, and Miss Blimber, who conversed occasionally. Whenever a young gentleman was not actually engaged with his knife and fork or spoon, his eye, with an irresistible attraction, sought the eye of Dr. Blimber, Mrs. Blimber, or Miss Blimber, and modestly rested there. Toots appeared to be the only exception to this rule. He sat next, Mr. Feeder, on Paul's side of the table, and frequently looked behind and before the intervening boys to catch a glimpse of Paul. Only once during dinner was there any conversation that included the young gentleman. It happened at the epic of the cheese, when the doctor, having taken a glass of port wine and hemmed twice or thrice, said, It is remarkable, Mr. Feeder, that the Romans, at the mention of this terrible people, their implacable enemies, every young gentleman fastened his gaze upon the doctor, with an assumption of the deepest interest. One of the number who happened to be drinking and who caught the doctor's eye glaring at him through the side of his tumbler, left off so hastily that he was convulsed for some moments, and in the sequel, ruined Dr. Blimber's point. It is remarkable, Mr. Feeder, said the doctor, beginning again slowly, that the Romans, in those gorgeous and profuse entertainments of which we read in the days of the emperors, when luxury had attained a height unknown before or since, and when whole provinces were ravaged to supply the splendid means of one imperial banquet. Here the offender, who had been swelling and straining and waiting in vain for a full stop, broke out violently. Johnson, said Mr. Feeder, in a low, reproachful voice, take some water. The doctor, looking very stern, made a pause until the water was brought and then resumed. And when Mr. Feeder, but Mr. Feeder, who saw that Johnson must break out again and who knew that the doctor would never come to a period for the young gentleman until he had finished all he had meant to say, couldn't keep his eye off Johnson and thus was caught in the fact of not looking at the doctor, who consequently stopped. I beg your pardon, sir, said Mr. Feeder, reddening. I beg your pardon, Dr. Blimber. And when, said the doctor, raising his voice, sir, as we read and have no reason to doubt, incredible as it may appear to the vulgar of our time, the brother of Vitelius prepared him a feast in which were served of fish two thousand dishes. Take some water, Johnson. Dishes, sir, said Mr. Feeder. Of various sorts of fowl five thousand dishes. Or try a crust of bread, said Mr. Feeder. And one dish pursued Dr. Blimber, raising his voice still higher as he looked all around the table, called from its enormous dimensions the shield of manoeuvre and made, among other costly ingredients, of the brains of pheasants. Oh, oh, oh! From Johnson. Oh, oh, oh! The sounds of the fish called scary. You'll burst some vessel in your head, said Mr. Feeder. You had better let it come. And the spawn of the lamprey brought from the Carpathian Sea, pursued the doctor in his severest voice. When we read of costly entertainment such as these and still remember that we have a Titus. What would be your mother's feelings if you died of apoplexy? said Mr. Feeder. A demission. And your blue, you know, said Mr. Feeder. A narrow, a tiberious, a caligula, a heliogabalus. And many more pursued the doctor. It is, Mr. Feeder, if you are doing me the honor to attend remarkable, very remarkable, sir. But Johnson, unable to support it any longer, burst at that moment into such an overwhelming fit of coughing that although both his immediate neighbors thumped him on the back and Mr. Feeder himself held a glass of water to his lips and the butler walked him up and down several times between his own chair and the sideboard, like a sentry. It was full five minutes before he was moderately composed and then there was a profound silence. Gentlemen, said Dr. Blimber, rise for grace. Cornelia, lift Domby down. Nothing of whom but his scalp was accordingly seen above the tablecloth. Johnson will repeat to me tomorrow morning before breakfast without book and from the Greek Testament. The first chapter of the Epistle of St. Paul to the Ephesians. We will resume our studies, Mr. Feeder, in half an hour. The young gentlemen bowed and withdrew. Mr. Feeder did likewise. During the half hour, the young gentlemen, broken into pairs, loitered arm in arm up and down a small piece of ground behind the house, to kindle a spark of animation in the breast of Briggs. But nothing happened so vulgar as play. Punctually, at the appointed time, the gong was sounded and the studies under the joint auspices of Dr. Blimber and Mr. Feeder were resumed. As the Olympic game of lounging up and down had been cut shorter than usual that day, on Johnson's account, they all went out for a walk before T. Even Briggs, though he hadn't begun yet, partook of this dissipation, in the enjoyment of which he looked over the cliff two or three times darkly. Dr. Blimber accompanied them and Paul had the honor of being taken in tow by the doctor himself, a distinguished state of things in which he looked very little and feeble. T. was served in a style no less polite than the dinner, and after T. the young gentleman rising and bowing as before withdrew to fetch up the unfinished tasks of that day or to get up the already looming tasks of tomorrow. In the meantime Mr. Feeder withdrew to his own room and Paul sat in a corner wondering whether Florence was thinking of him and what they were all about at Mrs. Pipgins. Mr. Toots, who had been detained by an important letter from the Duke of Wellington, found Paul out after a time and having looked at him for a long while as before inquired if he were fond of waistcoats. Paul said, Yes, sir. So am I, said Toots. No word more spake Toots that night but he stood looking at Paul as if he liked him and as there was company in that and Paul was not inclined to talk it answered his purpose better than conversation. At eight o'clock or so the gong sounded again for prayers in the dining room where the butler afterwards presided over a side table on which bread and cheese and beer were spread for such young gentlemen as desired to partake of those refreshments. The ceremonies concluded by the doctor saying gentlemen we will resume our studies at seven tomorrow and then for the first time Paul saw Cornelia Blimber's eye and saw that it was upon him when the doctor had said these words gentlemen we will resume our studies at seven tomorrow the pupils bowed again and went to bed. In the confidence of their own room upstairs Briggs said his head ached ready to split and that he should wish himself dead if it wasn't for his mother and a black bird he had at home. Tozer didn't say much but he sighed a good deal and told Paul to look out for his turn would come tomorrow. After uttering those prophetic words he undressed himself mootily and got into bed. Briggs was in his bed too and Paul in his bed too before the weak-eyed young man appeared to take away the candle when he wished them good night and pleasant dreams. But his benevolent wishes were in vain as far as Briggs and Tozer was concerned. For Paul, who lay awake for a long while and often woke afterwards found that Briggs was ridden by his lesson as a nightmare and that Tozer, whose mind was affected in his sleep by similar causes in a minor degree talked unknown tongues or scraps of Greek and Latin it was all one to Paul in the silence of night had an inexpressibly wicked and guilty effect. Paul had sunk into a sweet sleep and dreamed that he was walking hand in hand with Florence through beautiful gardens when they came to a large sunflower which suddenly expanded itself into a gong and began to sound. Opening his eyes he found that it was a dark, windy morning with a drizzling rain and that the real gong was giving dreadful note of preparation down in the hall. So he got up directly and found Briggs with hardly any eyes for nightmare and grief had made his face puffy putting his boots on while Tozer stood shivering and rubbing his shoulders in a very bad humor. Poor Paul couldn't dress himself easily not being used to it and asked them if they would have the goodness to tie some strings for him but as Briggs merely said bother and Tozer, oh yes he went down when he was otherwise ready to the next story where he saw a pretty young woman in leather gloves cleaning a stove the young woman seemed surprised at his appearance and asked him where his mother was and when Paul told her she was dead she took her gloves off and did what he wanted and furthermore rubbed his hands to warm them and gave them a kiss and told him whenever he wanted anything of that sort meaning in the dressing way to ask for Melia which Paul, thanking her very much said he certainly would. He then proceeded softly on his journey downstairs towards the room in which the young gentlemen resumed their studies when passing by a door that stood ajar a voice from within cried is that Domby? On Paul, replying yes ma'am for he knew the voice to be Miss Blimber's Miss Blimber said come in Domby and in he went Miss Blimber presented exactly the appearance that she had presented yesterday except that she wore a shawl her little light curls were as crisp as ever and she had already her spectacles on which made Paul wonder whether she went to bed in them she had a cool little sitting-room of her own up there with some books in it and no fire but Miss Blimber was never cold and never sleepy Miss Blimber I am going out for a constitutional Paul wondered what that was and why she didn't send the footmen out to get it in such unfavorable weather but he made no observation on the subject his attention being devoted to a little pile of new books on which Miss Blimber appeared to have been recently engaged these are yours Domby said Miss Blimber all of them ma'am? said Paul yes return Miss Blimber and Mr. Feeder will look you out some more very soon if you are as studious as I expect you will be Domby thank you ma'am said Paul I am going out for a constitutional resume Miss Blimber and while I am gone that is to say in the interval between this and breakfast Domby I wish you to read over what I have marked in these books and to tell me if you quite understand what you have got to learn don't lose time Domby for you have none to spare but take them downstairs and begin directly yes ma'am? answered Paul there was so many of them that although Paul put one hand under the bottom book and his other hand in his chin on the top book all closely the middle book slipped out before he reached the door and then they all tumble down on the floor Miss Blimber said oh Domby Domby this is really very careless and piled them up fresh for him and this time by didn't of balancing them with great nicety Paul got out of the room and down a few stairs before two of them escaped again he held the rest so tight that he only left one more on the first floor and one in the passage and when he got the main body down into the school room he set off upstairs again to collect the stragglers having at last amassed the whole library and climbed into his place he fell to work encouraged by a remark from Tozer to the effect that he was in for it now which was the only interruption he received till breakfast time at that meal for which he had no appetite everything was quite as solemn and genteel as at the others and when it was finished he followed Miss Blimber upstairs now Domby said Miss Blimber have you got on with those books they comprised a little English and a deal of Latin names of things of articles and substantives exercises thereon and preliminary rules a trifle of orthography a glance at ancient history a wink or two at modern ditto a few tables two or three weights and measures and a little general information when poor Paul had spelt out number two he found he had no idea of number one fragments whereof afterwards uptrooted themselves into number three which slided into number four which grafted itself on to number two so that whether twenty Romulus's made a rebus or Hick Hick Hock was Troy weight or a verb always agreed with an ancient Britain or three times four was Taurus a bull were open questions with him oh Domby Domby said Miss Blimber this is very shocking if you please said Paul I think if I might sometimes talk a little to old glove I should be able to do better nonsense Domby said Miss Blimber I couldn't hear of it this is not the place for gloves of any kind you must take the books down I suppose Domby one by one and perfect yourself in the days installment of subject A before you turn at all to subject B I am sorry to say Domby that your education appears to have been very much neglected so Papa says returned Paul but I told you I have been a weak child Florence knows I have so does Wickham who is Wickham asked Miss Blimber she has been my nurse Paul answered I must beg you not to mention Wickham to me then said Miss Blimber I couldn't allow it you asked me who she was said Paul very well returned Miss Blimber but this is all very different from being anything of that sort Domby and I couldn't think of permitting it as to having been weak you must begin to be strong and now take away the top book if you please Domby return when you are master of the theme Miss Blimber expressed her opinion on the subject of Paul's uninstructed state with a gloomy delight as if she had expected this result and were glad to find that they must be in constant communication Paul withdrew with the top task as he was told and labored away at it down below sometimes remembering every word of it and sometimes forgetting it all and everything else besides until at last he ventured upstairs again to repeat the lesson when it was nearly all driven out of his head before he began by Miss Blimber shutting up the book and saying go on Domby a proceeding so suggestive of the knowledge inside of her that Paul looked upon the young lady with consternation as a kind of learned Guy Faw or artificial bogal stuffed full of scholastic straw he acquitted himself very well nevertheless and Miss Blimber commending him as giving promise of getting on fast immediately provided him with subject B from which he passed to C and even D before dinner it was hard work resuming his studies soon after dinner and he felt giddy and confused and drowsy and dull but all the other young gentlemen had similar sensations and were obliged to resume their studies too if there were any comfort in that it was a wonder that the great clock in the hall instead of being constant to its first inquiry never said gentlemen we will now resume our studies for that phrase was often enough repeated in the neighborhood the studies went round like a mighty wheel and the young gentlemen were always stretched upon it after tea there were exercises again and preparations for the next day by candlelight and in due course there was bed where but for that resumption of the studies which took place in dreams were rest and sweet forgetfulness on Saturdays oh happy Saturdays when Florence always came at noon and never would in any weather stay away though Mrs. Pipchins snarled and growled and worried her bitterly those Saturdays were Sabbaths for at least two little Christians among all the Jews and did the holy Sabbath work of strengthening and knitting up a brothers and a sisters love not even Sunday nights the heavy Sunday nights whose shadow darkened the first waking burst of light on Sunday mornings could mar those precious Saturdays whether it was the great seashore where they sat and strolled together or whether it was only Mrs. Pipchins dull back room in which she sang to him so softly with his drowsy head upon her arm Paul never cared it was Florence that was all he thought of so on Sunday nights when the doctor's dark door stood a gape to swallow him up for another week the time was come for taking leave of Florence no one else Mrs. Wickham had been reached at home to the house in town and Miss Nipper now a smart young woman had come down to many a single combat with Mrs. Pipchins did Miss Nipper gallantly devote herself and if ever Mrs. Pipchins in all her life had found her match she had found it now Miss Nipper threw away the scabbard the first morning she arose in Mrs. Pipchins house she asked and gave no quarter she said it must be war and war it was and Mrs. Pipchins lived from that time in the midst of surprises harassings and defiances and skirmishing attacks that came bouncing in upon her from the passage even in unguarded moments of chops and carried desolations to her very toast Miss Nipper had returned one Sunday night to Florence from walking back with Paul to the doctors when Florence took from her bosom a little piece of paper on which she had penciled down some words see here Susan she said these are the names of the little books that Paul brings home to do those long exercises with when he is so tired I copied them last night while he was writing don't show him to me Miss do please return Nipper I'd as soon see Mrs. Pipchins I want you to buy them for me Susan if you will tomorrow morning I have money enough said Florence why goodness gracious me Miss Floyd return Miss Nipper how can you talk like that when you have books upon books already and master's and mistress's are teaching of you everything continual though my belief is that your daughter Miss Dombie would never have learned you nothing never would have thought of it unless you'd asked him when he couldn't well refuse but giving consent when asked and offering when unasked Miss is quite two things I may not have my objections to a young man's keeping company with me and when he puts the question may say yes but that's not saying would you be so kind but you can buy me the books Susan and you will when you know I want them well miss and why do you want them replied Nipper adding in a lower voice if it was to fling at Mrs. Pipchins head I'd buy a cartload Paul has a great deal too much to do Susan said Florence I am sure of it and well you may be miss return her maid and make your mind quite easy that the willing dearest worked and worked away if the those is Latin legs exclaim Miss Nipper with strong feeling and illusion to Paul's give me English ones I am afraid he feels lonely and lost to Dr. Blimber Susan pursued Florence turning away her face I said Miss Nipper with great sharpness oh them blimbers don't blame anyone said Florence it's a mistake I say nothing about blame miss cried Miss Nipper for I know that you object but I may wish miss that the family was set to work to make new roads and that Miss Blimber went in front and had the pickaxe after this speech Miss Nipper who is perfectly serious wiped her eyes I think I could perhaps give Paul some help Susan if I had these books said Florence and make the coming week a little easier to him at least I want to try so buy them for me dear and I will never forget how kind it was of you to do it it must have been a harder heart than Susan Nippers that could have rejected the little purse Florence held out with these words or the gentle look of the treaty with which she seconded her petition Susan put the purse in her pocket without reply and trotted out at once upon her errand the books were not easy to procure and the answer at several shops was either that they were just out of them or that they never kept them or that they had a great many last month or that they had expected a great many next week was not easily baffled in such an enterprise and having entrapped a white haired youth in a black calico apron from a library where she was known to accompany her in her quest she led him such a life in going up and down that he exerted himself to the utmost only to get rid of her and finally enabled her to return home in triumph with those treasures then after her own daily lessons were over Florence sat down at night to track Paul's footsteps through the thorny ways of learning and being possessed of a naturally quick and sound capacity and taught by that most wonderful of masters love it was not long before she gained upon Paul's heels and caught and passed him not a word of this was breathed to Mrs. Pipchen but many a night when they were all in bed and when Miss Nipper with her hair and papers and herself asleep in some uncomfortable attitude reposed unconscious by her side and when the chinking ashes in the grate were cold and gray and when the candles were burnt down and guttering out Florence tried so hard to be a substitute for one small domby that her fortitude and perseverance might have almost won her a free right to bear the name herself and high was her reward when one Saturday evening as little Paul was sitting down as usual to resume his studies she sat down by his side and showed him all that was so rough made smooth and all that was so dark made clear and plain before him it was nothing but a startled look in Paul's one face a flush, a smile and then a close embrace but God knows how her heart leapt up at this rich payment for her trouble oh Floyd cried her brother how I love you and I you dear oh I am sure of that Floyd he said no more about it but all that evening sat close by her very quiet and in the night he called out from his little room within hers three or four times that he loved her regularly after that Florence was prepared to sit down with Paul on Saturday night and patiently assist him through so much as they could anticipate together of his next week's work the cheering thought that he was laboring on where Florence had just toiled before him would of itself have been a stimulant to Paul in the perpetual resumption of his studies but coupled with the actual lightning of his load consequent on this assistance it saved him possibly from sinking underneath the burden which the fair Cornelia Blimber piled upon his back it was not that Miss Blimber meant to be too hard upon him or that Dr. Blimber meant to bear too heavily on the young gentleman in general Cornelia merely held the faith in which he had been bred and the doctor in some partial confusion of his ideas regarded the young gentleman as if they were all doctors and were born grown up comforted by the applause of the young gentleman's nearest relations and urged on by their blind vanity and ill-considered haste it would have been strange if Dr. Blimber had discovered his mistake or trimmed his swelling sails to any other tack thus in the case of Paul when Dr. Blimber said he made great progress and was naturally clever Mr. Dombie was more bent than ever on his being forced and crammed in the case of Briggs when Dr. Blimber reported that he did not make great progress yet and was not naturally clever Briggs Sr. was inexorable in the same purpose in short however high and false the temperature at which the doctor kept his hot house the owners of the plants were always ready to lend a helping hand at the bellows and to stir the fire such spirits as he had in the outset Paul soon lost of course but he retained all that was strange and old and thoughtful in his character and under circumstances so favorable to the development of those tendencies became even more strange and old and thoughtful than before the only difference was that he kept his character to himself he grew more thoughtful and reserved every day and had no such curiosity in any living member of the doctor's household as he had had at Mrs. Pipchins he loved to be alone and in those short intervals when he was not occupied with his books like nothing so well as wandering about the house by himself or sitting on the stairs listening to the great clock in the hall he was intimate with all the paper hanging in the house saw things that no one else saw in the patterns found out miniature tigers and lions running up the bedroom walls and squinting faces leering in the squares and diamonds and the floor cloth the solitary child lived on surrounded by this arabesque work of his musing fancy and no one understood him Mrs. Blimber thought him odd and sometimes the servant said among themselves that little Donby moped but that was all unless young Toots had some idea on the subject to the expression of which he was wholly unequal ideas like ghosts according to the common notion of ghosts must be spoken to a little before they will explain themselves and Toots had long left off asking any questions of his own mind some missed there may have been issuing from that leaden casket his cranium which if it could have taken shape and form would have become a genie but it could not and it only so far followed the example of the smoke in the Arabian story as to roll out in a thick cloud and there hang and hover but it left a little figure visible upon a lonely shore and Toots was always staring at it he would say to Paul 50 times a day quite well sir thank you Paul would answer shake hands would be Toots next advance which Paul of course would immediately do Mr. Toots generally said again after a long interval of staring and hard breathing how are you to which Paul again replied quite well sir thank you one evening Mr. Toots was sitting at his desk oppressed by correspondence when a great purpose seemed to flash upon him he laid down his pen and went off to seek Paul whom he found at last after a long search looking through the window of his little bedroom I say cried Toots speaking the moment he entered the room lest he should forget it what do you think about things replied Paul do you though said Toots appearing to consider that fact in itself surprising if you had to die said Paul looking up into his face Mr. Toots started and seemed much disturbed don't you think you would rather die on a moonlight night when the sky was quite clear and the wind blowing as it did last night Mr. Toots said looking doubtfully at Paul and shaking his head that he didn't know about that not blowing at least said Paul but sounding in the air like the sea sounds in the shells it was a beautiful night when I had listened to the water for a long time I got up and looked out there was a boat over there in the full light of the moon a sail the child looked at him so steadfastly and spoke so earnestly that Mr. Toots feeling himself called upon to say something about this boat said smugglers but with an impartial remembrance of there being two sides to every question he added or preventive a boat with a sail repeated in the full light of the moon the sail like an arm all silver it went away into the distance and what do you think it seemed to do as it moved with the waves pitch said Mr. Toot it seemed to beckon said the child to beckon me to come there she is Toots was almost beside himself with dismay at this sudden exclamation after what had gone before and cried my sister Florence cried Paul looking up here and waving her hand she sees me good night dear good night his quick transition to a state of unbounded pleasure as he stood at his window kissing and clapping his hands and the way in which the light retreated from his features as she passed out of his view and left a patient melancholy on the little face were too remarkable wholly to escape even Toots's notice their interview being interrupted at this moment by a visit from Mrs. Pipchin who usually brought her black skirts to pair upon Paul just before dusk once or twice a week Toots had no opportunity of improving the occasion but it left so marked an impression on his mind that he twice returned after having exchanged the usual salutations to ask Mrs. Pipchin how she did This the irascible old lady conceived to be a deeply devised and long meditated insult originating in the diabolical invention of the weak-eyed young man downstairs against whom she accordingly lodged a formal complaint with Dr. Blimber that very night who mentioned to the young man that if he ever did it again he should be obliged to part with him the evenings being longer now Paul stole up to his window every evening to look out for Florence she always passed at a certain time until she saw him and their mutual recognition was a gleam of sunshine in Paul's daily life often after dark one other figure walked alone before the doctor's house he rarely joined them on Saturday now he could not bear it he would rather come unrecognized and look up at the windows where his son was qualifying for a man and wait and watch and plan and hope oh could he but have seen as or seen as others did the slight spare boy above watching the waves and clouds at twilight with his earnest eyes and breasting the window of his solitary cage when birds flew by as if he would have emulated them and soared away end of chapter 12 chapter 13 of Dombie and Son this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org recording by Cynthia Lyons Dombie and Son by Charles Dickens chapter 13 shipping intelligence and office business Mr. Dombie's offices were in a court where there was an old established stall of choice fruit at the corner where perambulating merchants of both sexes offered for sale at any time between the hours of ten and five slippers, pocket books, sponges, dogs, collars and Windsor soap and sometimes a pointer or an oil painting the pointer always came that way with a view to the stock exchange where a sporting taste originating generally in bets of new hats is much in vogue the other commodities were addressed to the general public but they were never offered by the vendors to Mr. Dombie when he appeared the dealers in those wares fell off respectfully the principal slipper and dog's collar man who considered himself a public character and whose portrait was screwed on to an artist's store in Cheepside threw up his forefinger to the brim of his hat as Mr. Dombie went by the ticket porter if he were not absent on a job always ran officially before to open Mr. Dombie's office door as wide as possible and hold it open with his hat off while he entered the clerks within were not a whit behind hand in their demonstrations of respect a solemn hush prevailed as Mr. Dombie passed through the outer office the wit of the counting house became in a moment as mute as the row of leather and fire buckets hanging up behind him such vapid and flat daylight as filtered through the ground glass windows and skylights leaving a black sediment upon the panes showed the books and papers and the figures bending over them enveloped in a studious gloom and as much abstracted in appearance from the world without as if they were assembled at the bottom of the sea while a moldy little strong room in the obscure perspective where a shady lamp was always burning might have represented the cavern of some ocean monster looking on with a red eye at these mysteries of the deep when perched the messenger whose place was on a little bracket like a timepiece saw Mr. Dombie come in or rather when he felt that he was coming for he had usually an instinctive sense of his approach he hurried into Mr. Dombie's room stirred the fire quarried fresh coals from the bowels of the coal box newspaper to air upon the fender put the chair ready and the screen in its place and was round upon his heel on the instant of Mr. Dombie's entrance to take his great coat and hat and hang them up then Perch took the newspaper and gave it a turn or two in his hands before the fire and laid it deferentially at Mr. Dombie's elbow then so little objection had Perch to being deferential in the last degree that if he might have laid himself at Mr. Dombie's feet or might have called him by some such title as used to be bestowed upon the caliph Haroum Al-Trasheed he would have been all the better pleased as this honor would have been an innovation and an experiment Perch was feigned to content himself by expressing as well as he could in his manner you are the light of my eyes you are the breath of my soul you are the commander of the faithful Perch with this imperfect happiness to cheer him he would shut the door softly walk away on tiptoe and leave his great chief to be stared at through a dome shaped window with beads by ugly chimney pots and backs of houses and especially by the bold window of a hair cutting saloon on the first floor where a waxen effigy bald as a musselman in the morning and covered after eleven o'clock in the day with luxuriant hair and whiskers in the latest Christian fashion showed him the wrong side of its head forever in the common world as it was accessible through the medium of the outer office to which Mr. Domby's presence in his own room may be said to have struck like damp or cold air there were two degrees of descent Mr. Karker in his own office was the first step Mr. Morphin in his own office was the second each of these gentlemen in a small chamber like a bathroom opening from the passage outside Mr. Domby's door Mr. Karker as grand vizier inhabited the room that was nearest to the sultan Mr. Morphin as an officer of inferior state inhabited the room that was nearest to the clocks the gentleman last mentioned was a cheerful looking hazel-eyed elderly bachelor gravely attired as to his upper man in black and as to his legs in pepper and salt color his dark hair was just touched here and there with specks of gray as though the tread of time had splashed it and his whiskers were already white he had a mighty respect for Mr. Domby and rendered him due homage but as he was of a temper himself and never wholly at his ease in that stately presence he was disquieted by no jealousy of the many conferences enjoyed by Mr. Karker and felt a secret satisfaction in having duties to discharge which rarely exposed him to be singled out for such distinction he was a great musical amateur in his way after business and had a paternal affection for the violin cello which was once in every week transported from Islington his place of abode to a certain club room hard by the bank where quartets of the most tormenting and excruciating nature were executed every Wednesday evening by a private party Mr. Karker was a gentleman 38 or 40 years old of a florid complexion and with two unbroken rows of glistening teeth whose regularity and whiteness were quite distressing it was impossible to escape the observation of them for he showed them whenever he spoke and bore so wide a smile upon his countenance a smile however very rarely indeed extending beyond his mouth that there was something in it like the snarl of a cat he affected a stiff white cravat after the example of his principal and was always closely buttoned up and tightly dressed his manner toward Mr. Dombie was deeply conceived and perfectly expressed he was familiar with him in the very extremity and sense of the distance between them Mr. Dombie to a man in your position from a man in mine there is no show of subservience compatible with the transaction of business between us that I should think sufficient I frankly tell you sir I give it up altogether I feel that I could not satisfy my own mind and heaven knows Mr. Dombie you can afford to dispense if he had carried those words about with him printed on a placard and had constantly offered it to Mr. Dombie's perusal on the breast of his coat he could not have been more explicit than he was this was Carca the manager Mr. Carca the junior Walter's friend was his brother two or three years older than he but widely removed in station the younger brother's post was on the top of the official ladder the elder brothers at the bottom the elder brother never gained a stave or raised his foot to mount one young man passed above his head and rose and rose but he was always at the bottom he was quite resigned to occupy that low condition never complained of it but he hoped to escape from it how do you do this morning said Mr. Carca the manager entering Mr. Dombie's room soon after his arrival one day with a bundle of papers in his hand how do you do Carca said Mr. Dombie coolish observed Carca stirring the fire rather said Mr. Dombie any news of the young gentleman who is so important to us all asked Carca with his whole regiment of teeth on parade yes not direct news I hear he's very well said Mr. Dombie who had come from Brighton overnight but no one knew it very well and becoming a great scholar no doubt observed the manager I hope so returned Mr. Dombie eagad said Mr. Carca shaking his head time flies I think so sometimes I hear Mr. Dombie glancing at his newspaper oh you you have no reason to think so observed Carca one who sits on such an elevation as yours and can sit there unmoved in all seasons hasn't much reason to know anything about the flight of time it's men like myself who are low down and are not superior and who inherit new masters in the course of time that have caused to look about us I shall have a rising sun to worship soon time enough time enough Carca said Mr. Dombie rising from his chair and standing with his back to the fire have you anything there for me I don't know that I need trouble you return Carca turning over the papers in his hand you have a committee today one at three you know and one at three three quarters added Mr. Dombie catch you forgetting anything exclaimed Carca still turning over his papers if Mr. Paul inherits your memory he'll be a troublesome customer in the house one of you is enough you have an accurate memory of your own said Mr. Dombie oh I return the manager it's the only capital of a man like me Mr. Dombie did not look less pompous or at all displeased as he stood leaning against the chimney piece surveying his of course unconscious Clark from head to foot the stiffness and nicety of Mr. Carca's dress and a certain arrogance of manner either natural to him or imitated from a pattern that are not far off gave great additional effect to his humility he seemed a man who would contend against the power that vanquished him if he could but who was utterly born down by the greatness and superiority of Mr. Dombie is Morphin here asked Mr. Dombie after a short pause during which Mr. Carca had been fluttering his papers and muttering little abstracts of their contents to himself Morphin's here he answered looking up with his widest and most sudden smile humming musical recollections of his last night's quartet party I suppose through the walls between us and driving me half mad I wish he'd made a bonfire of his violin cello and burn his music books in it you respect nobody Carca I think said Mr. Dombie no inquired Carca with another wide and most feline show of his teeth well, not many people I believe I wouldn't answer perhaps as if he were only thinking of it for more than one a dangerous quality if real and a not less dangerous one if feigned Mr. Dombie hardly seemed to think so as he still stood with his back to the fire drawn up to his full height and looking at his head clerk with a dignified composure in which there seemed to lurk a stronger latent sense of power than usual talking of Morphin resumed Mr. Carca taking out one paper from the rest he reports a junior dead in the agency at Barbados and proposes to reserve a passage in the sun and air she'll sail in a month or so for the successor you don't care who goes I suppose we have nobody of that sort here Mr. Dombie shook his head with supreme indifference it's no very precious appointment observed Mr. Carca taking up a pen with which to endorse a memorandum on the back of the paper I hope he may bestow it on some orphan nephew of a musical friend it may perhaps stop his fiddle playing if he has a gift that way who's that come in I beg your pardon Mr. Carca I didn't know you were here sir answered Walter appearing with some letters in his hand unopened and newly arrived Mr. Carca the junior sir at the mention of this name Mr. Carca the manager was or affected to be touched to the quick with shame and humiliation he cast his eyes full on Mr. Dombie with an altered and apologetic look abased them on the ground and remained for a moment without speaking I thought sir he said suddenly and angrily turning on Walter that you had been before requested not to drag Mr. Carca the junior into your conversation I beg your pardon returned Walter I was only going to say that Mr. Carca the junior had told me he believed you were gone out or I should not have knocked at the door when you were engaged with Mr. Dombie these are letters from Mr. Dombie sir very well sir returned Mr. Carca the manager plucking them sharply from his hand thinking about your business but in taking them with so little ceremony Mr. Carca dropped one on the floor and did not see what he had done neither did Mr. Dombie observe the letter lying near his feet Walter hesitated for a moment thinking that one or the other of them would notice it but finding that neither did he stopped came back picked it up and laid it himself on Mr. Dombie's desk the letters were post letters and it happened that the one in question was Mrs. Pipchin's regular report directed as usual for Mrs. Pipchin was an indifferent penwoman by Florence Mr. Dombie having his attention silently called to this letter by Walter started fiercely at him as if he believed that he had purposely selected it from all the rest you can leave the room sir said Mr. Dombie haughtily he crushed the letter in his hand and having watched Walter out at the door put it in his pocket without breaking the seal these continued references to Mr. Carca the junior Mr. Carca the manager began as soon as they were alone or to a man of my position uttered before one in yours so unspeakably distressing nonsense Carca Mr. Dombie interrupted you are too sensitive I am sensitive he returned if one in your position could by any possibility imagine yourself in my place which you cannot you would be so too as Mr. Dombie's thoughts were evidently pursuing some other subject his discreet ally broke off here and stood ready with his teeth ready to present to him when he should look up you want somebody to send to the West Indies you were saying observed Mr. Dombie hurriedly yes replied Carca send young gay good very good indeed nothing easier said Mr. Carca without any show of surprise and taking up the pen to re-endorse the letter as coolly as he had done before send young gay call him back Mr. Dombie Mr. Carca was quick to do so and Walter was quick to return gay said Mr. Dombie turning a little to look at him shoulder here is a an opening said Mr. Carca with his mouth stretched to the utmost in the West Indies at Barbados I am going to send you said Mr. Dombie scorning to embellish the bare truth to fill a junior situation in the counting house at Barbados let your uncle know from me that I have chosen you to go to the West Indies Walter's breath was so greatly taken away by his astonishment that he could hardly find enough for the repetition of the words West Indies somebody must go said Mr. Dombie and you are young and healthy and your uncle's circumstances are not good tell your uncle that you are appointed you will not go yet there will be an interval of a month or two perhaps shall I remain there sir should you remain there sir repeated Mr. Dombie turning a little more round towards him what do you mean what does he mean Carca live there sir faltered Walter certainly returned Mr. Dombie Walter bowed that's all said Mr. Dombie resuming his letters you will explain to him in good time about the usual outfit and so forth Carca you needn't wait gay observe Mr. Carca there to the gums unless said Mr. Dombie stopping in his reading without looking off the letter and seemed to listen unless he has anything to say no sir returned Walter agitated and confused and almost stunned as an infinite variety of pictures presented themselves to his mind in which Captain Cuddle in his glazed hat transfixed with astonishment at Mrs. Max Stingers and his uncle bemoaning his loss in the little back parlor held prominent places I hardly know I am much obliged sir he needn't wait Carca said Mr. Dombie and as Mr. Carca again echoed the words and also collected his papers as if he were going away too Walter felt that his lingering any longer would be an unpardonable intrusion especially as he had nothing to say and therefore walked out quite confounded going along the passage with the mingled consciousness and helplessness of a dream he heard Mr. Dombie's door shut again as Mr. Carca came out and immediately afterwards that gentleman called to him bring your friend Mr. Carca the junior to my room sir if you please Walter went to the outer office and apprised Mr. Carca the junior of his errand who accordingly came out from behind a partition where he sat alone in one corner and returned with him to the room of Mr. Carca the manager that gentleman was standing with his back to the fire and his hands under his coattails looking over his white cravat as unpromisingly as Mr. Dombie himself could have looked he received them without any change in his attitude or softening of his harsh and black expression merely signing to Walter to close the door John Carca said the manager when this was done turning suddenly upon his brother with his two rows of teeth bristling as if he would have bitten him what is the league between you and this young man in virtue of which I am haunted and hunted by the mention of your name is it not enough for you John Carca that I am your near relation and can't detach myself from that say disgrace James interposed the other in a low voice finding that he stammered for a word you mean it and have reason say disgrace from that disgrace assented his brother with keen emphasis but is the fact to be blurted out and trumpeted and proclaimed continually in the presence of the very house in moments of confidence too do you think your name is calculated to harmonize in this place with trust and confidence John Carca no return the other no James God knows I have no such thought what is your thought then said his brother and why do you thrust yourself in my way haven't you injured me enough already I have never injured you James willfully my brother said the manager that's injury enough I wish I could undo it James I wish you could and would during this conversation Walter had looked from one brother to the other with pain and amazement he who was the senior in years and junior in the house stood with his eyes cast upon the ground and his head bowed listening to the reproaches of the other though these were rendered very bitter by the tone and look with which they were accompanied and by the presence of Walter whom they so much surprised and shocked he entered no other protest against them then by slightly raising his right hand in a deprecatory manner as if he would have said spare me had they been blows and he a brave man under strong constraint and weakened by bodily suffering he might have stood before the executioner generous and quick in all his emotions and regarding himself as the innocent occasion of these taunts Walter now struck in with all the earnestness he felt Mr. Parker he said addressing himself to the manager indeed indeed this is my fault solely in a kind of heedlessness for which I cannot blame myself enough I have I have no doubt mentioned Mr. Parker the junior much oftener than was necessary and have allowed his name sometimes to slip through my lips when it was against your express wish but it has been my own mistake sir we have never exchanged one word upon the subject very few indeed on any subject and it has not been added Walter after a moment's pause all heedlessness on my part sir for I have felt an interest in Mr. Parker ever since I have been here and have hardly been able to help speaking of him sometimes when I have thought of him so much Walter said this from his soul and with the very breath of honor for he looked upon the bowed head and the downcast eyes and upraised hand and thought I have felt it and why should I not avow it in behalf of this unfriended broken man Mr. Parker looked at him as he spoke and when he had finished speaking with a smile that seemed to divide his face into two parts you are an excitable youth gay he said and should endeavor to cool down a little now for it would be unwise to encourage feverish predispositions be as cool as you can gay be as cool as you can you might have asked Mr. John Parker himself if you have not done so whether he claims to be or is an object of such strong interest James do me justice said his brother I have claimed nothing and I claim nothing believe me on my honor set his brother with another smile as he warmed himself before the fire on my life my fallen life returned the other in the same low voice but with a deeper stress upon his words then he had yet seemed capable of giving them believe me I have held myself aloof and kept alone this has been unsought by me I have avoided him and everyone in truth you have avoided me Mr. Parker said Walter with the tears rising to his eyes so true was his compassion I know it to my disappointment and regret when I first came here and ever since I am sure I have tried to be as much your friend as one of my age I never assumed to be but it has been of no use and observe said the manager taking him up quickly it will be of still less use gay if you persist in forcing Mr. John Parker's name on people's attention that is not the way to befriend Mr. John Parker ask him if he thinks it is nervous to me said the brother it only leads to such a conversation as the present which I need not say I could have well spared no one can be a better friend to me he spoke here very distinctly as if he would impress it upon Walter then in forgetting me and leaving me to go my way unquestioned and unnoticed your memory not being retentive gay of what you are told by others said Mr. Parker the manager warming himself with great and increased satisfaction I thought it well that you should be told this from the best authority nodding toward his brother you are not likely to forget it now I hope that's all gay you can go Walter passed out of the door and was about to close it after him when hearing the voice of the brothers again and also the mention of his own name he stood irresolutely with his hand upon the lock and the door ajar uncertain whether to return or go away in this position he could not help over hearing what followed think of me more leniently if you can James said John Parker when I tell you I have had how could I help having with my history written here striking himself upon the breast my whole heart awakened by my observation of that boy Walter gay I saw in him when he first came here almost my other self your other self repeated the manager disdainfully not as I am but as I was when I first came here too as sanguine giddy youthful inexperienced flushed with the same restless and adventurous fancies and full of the same qualities fraught with the same capacity of leading on to good or evil I hope not said his brother with some hidden and sarcastic meaning in his tone you strike me sharply and your hand is steady and your thrust is very deep return the other speaking or so Walter thought as if some cruel weapon actually stabbed him as he spoke I imagined all this when he was a boy I believed it it was a truth to me I saw him lightly walking on the edge of an unseen gulf where so many others walk with equal gait and from which the old excuse interrupted his brother as he stirred the fire so many go on say so many fall from which one traveler fell return the other who set forward on his way a boy like him and missed his footing more and more left a little and a little lower and went on stumbling still until he fell headlong and found himself below a shattered man think what I suffered when I watched that boy you have only yourself to thank for it return the brother only myself he is scented with a sigh I don't seek to divide the blame or shame you have divided the shame James Parker muttered through his teeth and through so many and such close teeth he could mutter well ah James returned his brother speaking for the first time in an accent of reproach and seeming by the sound of his voice to have covered his face with his hands I have been since then a useful foil to you you have trodden be freely in your climbing up don't spurn me with your heel a silence ensued after a time Mr. Parker the manager was heard rustling among his papers as if he had resolved to bring the interview to a conclusion at the same time his brother withdrew nearer to the door that's all he said I watched him with such trembling and such fear and little punishment to me until he passed the place where I first fell and then, though I had been his father I believe I never could have thanked God more devoutly I didn't dare to warn him and advise him but if I had seen direct cause I would have shown him my example I was afraid to be seen speaking with him lest it should be thought I did him harm I attempted him to evil and corrupted him or lest I really should there may be such contagion in me I don't know peace out my history in connection with young Walter Gay and what he has made me feel and think of me more leniently James if you can with these words he came out to where Walter was standing he turned a little paler when he saw him there and paler yet when Walter caught him by the hand and said in a whisper Mr. Cocker pray let me thank you let me say how much I feel for you how sorry I am to have been the unhappy cause of all this how I almost look upon you now as my protector and guardian how very very much I feel obliged to you and pity you said Walter squeezing both his hands hardly knowing in his agitation what he did or said Mr. Morphin's room being close at hand and empty and the door wide open they moved thither by one accord the passage being seldom free from one passing two or fro while they were there and Walter saw in Mr. Cocker's face some traces of the emotion within he almost felt as if he had never seen the face before it was so greatly changed Walter he said laying his hand on his shoulder I am far removed from you and may I ever be do you know what I am what you are appeared to hang on Walter's lips as he regarded him attentively it was begun said Cocker before my 21st birthday led up to long before but not begun till near that time I had robbed them when I came of age I robbed them afterwards before my 22nd birthday it was all found out and then Walter from all men's society I died again his last few words hung trembling upon Walter's lips but he could neither utter them nor any of his own the house was very good to me may heaven reward the old man for his forbearance this one too his son who was then newly in the firm where I had held great trust I was called into that room which is now his I have never entered it since and came out what you know me for many years I sat in my present seat alone as now but then a known and recognized example to the rest they were all merciful to me and I lived time has altered that part of my poor expiation and I think except the three heads of the house there is no one here who knows my story rightly before the little boy grows up and has it told to him my corner may be vacant that it might be so this is the only change to me since that day when I left all youth and hope and good men's company behind me in that room God bless you Walter keep you and all dear to you in honesty or strike them dead some recollection of his trembling from head to foot as if with excessive cold and of his bursting into tears was all that Walter could add to this when he tried to recall exactly what had passed between them when Walter saw him next he was bending over his desk in his old silent drooping humbled way then observing him at his work and feeling how resolved he evidently was that no further intercourse should arise between them and thinking again and again all he had seen and heard that morning in so short a time in connection with the history of both the carcers Walter could hardly believe that he was under orders for the West Indies and would soon be lost to Uncle Saul and Captain Cuddle and to glimpse his few and far between of Florence Dombie no he meant Paul and to all he loved and liked and looked for truly life but it was true and the news had already penetrated to the outer office for while he sat with a heavy heart pondering on these things and resting his head upon his arm Perch the messenger descended from his mahogany bracket and jogging his elbow begged his pardon but wished to say in his ear did he think he could arrange to England a jar of preserved ginger cheap for Mrs. Perch's own eating in the course of her recovery from her next confinement End of Chapter 13