|How the videos on the Gerlach channel are organized|
|Quiz: What do you know about "relationships"?|
20 questions about the relationships in your life
|Requisites for satisfying relationships|
Learn the ingredients of a "satisfying, healthy relationship" in order to improve them!
|Options for improving your relationships - Lesson 4 of 7|
Key steps you can take to improve the satisfaction of any relationship - including with yourself!
|Are you a "Grown Wounded Child" (GWC)?|
Psychological wounds cause most relationship problems. This video highlights symptoms of such wounds in yourself and others.
|Have you promoted yourself to EQUAL yet?|
Many shame-based (wounded) people put their needs last, instead of EQUAL. Are you such a person?
|Practical options for improving self respect - part 1 of 2|
The most crippling of six psychological wounds from early-childhood traum is SHAME. Once recognized, it can be converted into self-respect and love over time.
|Practical options for improving self respect - part 2 of 2|
Specific options for shifting shame ("low self esteem") toward healthy self-respect and non-egotistical pride
|Declare and affirm your rights as a dignified, worthy human being|
Freeing your true Self and using a Bill of Personal Rights are two keys to effectivr assertion and healthy relationships
|Do you REALLY know what you need?|
Learn how to dig down below your surface needs to identify the primary needs that cause them.
|A simple, powerful AWARENESS exercise|
A simple 30-second exercize to improve your self-awareness - and your communication, relationships, serenity, and health
|Are you an empathic LISTENER?|
LISTENING is essential for effective communication and satisfying relationships. It's a learnable skill
|Tools for solving "relationship problems"|
Practical options for understanding and resolving "problems" with adults and kids
|How to reduce the 3 REAL causes of "stress"|
Three core causes of daily and chronic stress, and how to reduce two of them
|The term"mental illness" is outdated and harmful!|
(Non-organic) abnormal thinking and behavior is NOT an "illness" - it's a symptom of psychological wounds from early-childhood trauma
|Options for relating well to "difficult people" (behavior)|
See aggravating, obnoxious people a psychologically wounded and unaware, and assert your boundaries and opinions respectfully
|Recognize and adapt to "toxic" relationships|
A veteran family therapist defines "toxic" (harmful) relationships and suggests four ways to adapt to them
|Tip: use respectful "I-messages" with "unpleasant" people|
A three-part assertion message you can use to react to bothersome behaviors or attitudes
|Options for improving family (adult) relationships|
Family relationships are unique, compared to others. Options for resolving common relationship problems with adult relatives.
|Tip: How to manage "values conflicts" effectively|
Admit values conflicts and agree to disagree, rather than fighting, arguing, blaming, hinting, pleading, or criticizing.
|How to REALLY change bad habits|
"Bad habits" are caused by well-intentioned "false selves." Free your true Self, and reduce toxic habits!
|How to reduce chronic or excessive guilt to normal|
Excessive guilt is a common wound from early-childhood trauma. A veteran therapist shows you how to reduce chronic or excessive guilt to normal.
|Improve honesty in yourself and others|
Dishonesty is usually caused by psychological wounds - specially FEAR and shame. Once admitted, both can be reduced!
|Options for USING anger and frustration|
Anger and frustration feel the same, but have different causes. Learn to distinguish them and USE them to fill current needs!
|What you need to know about "abusive" relationships|
"Abuse" is really "aggression," unless it meets 3 behavioral criteria. Can you name them? Watch your terminology!
|The truth about being "emotionally unavailable"|
Being "cold" and "insensitive" is caused by six psychological wounds from early-childhood trauma. Once admitted, they can be reduced
|Options for regaining lost trust in someone|
5 steps to regain lost trust in an adult or child over time
|How to pick an effective (relationship) counselor or therapist|
Clarify your therapy goals, and use these criteria to pick an effective professional helper
|The truth about "multiple personalities"|
Minor to moderate "personality splitting" is common and NORMAL, not a "mental illness"!
|How "mature" are you? How do you judge emotional+psychological "maturity"?|
A veteran therapist explores "personal growth" and "maturity," and suggests sample criteria for judging your (or someone;s) "maturity."
|Tip: how to give EFFECTIVE verbal feedback|
Options for giving EFFECTIVE verbal feedback to someone
|How to "confront" someone successfully|
Learn how to turn "confrontation" (assertion) into a personal and relationship asset
|The truth about excessive fear and anxiety|
Excessive fear is one of 6 wounds from major childhood trauma. Use "parts work" to reduce fear and anxiety to normal.
|Do you know how to manage relationship "triangles"?|
Persecutor - Victim - Rescuer "triangles" stress all social groups. This video shows what causes them and how to manage them.
|How to resolve major loyalty conflicts|
Suggestions from a veteran family therapist on how to reduce guilt and anxiety over choosing between two or more people
|Options for improving your friendships|
A veteran family therapist offers perspective on improving the quality and quantity of your friendships
|Were you taught to be *empathic*? Can you develop your empathy now?|
Empathy is esential for satisfying relationships. It usually develops in childhood from empathic caregivers - and can be developed later,
|The truth about "emotional abuse"|
A veteran trauma-recovery therapist corrects common errors about "emotional (verbal) abuse," and proposes two options for "abusers" and "victims"i
|Options for parenting "difficult" kids effectively|
A veteran family therapist proposes that adult wounds and unawareness are the REAL problems undelying "difficult kids'" behaviors and attitudes
|The truth about "negative (relationship} energy"|
"Negative energy" refers to your own discomfort around unpleasant people. This video explores this and offers useful options
|The truth about "Narcissism" and "Egotism"|
Being "self centered" is a symptom of major psychological wounds and being governed by a protective "false self."
|The truth about "Borderline Personality Disorder" (BPD)|
A veteran trauma-recovery therapist proposes BPD is not a "mental illness," it's a SYMPTOM of up to six psychological wounds from childhood trauma
|The truth about "pathological liars"|
Compulsive liars are psychologically wounded and ruled by a "false self, not BAD." They don't know this or what to do about it.
|Get expert advice from your "Future Self"|
A safe, interesting guided-imagery exercise to tap into your unconscious wisdom
|Are you "enabling" yourself or someone else?|
Protect your integrity: avoid "enabling" wounded, unaware adults or kids
|How to tell if you have "recovered" from a break-up.|
A summary of key criteria for judging if someone has recovered "enough" from a break-up
|How to avoid or resolve relationship "cutoffs" (not speaking to each other)|
Three options you need to know to resume ruptured relationships
|What can you do about "approach - avoid" relationships?|
A veteran family therapist explains why some people seek and then avoid intimacy, and options for reacting to this
|Options for "scapegoats" and "black sheep"|
A brief explaration of two stressful group dynamics and options for managing them effectively
|What you need to know about "power struggles" ("arguing")|
A veteran family therapist explores "power struggles," with adults or kids, and ways to avoid and stop them
|Are you getting enough friendly physical contact?|
An initation to become aware of whether you're getting and giving enough nourishing physical contact to important people in your life.
|How well do you adapt to interpersonal rejection?|
Perspective by a veteran family therapist on how to understand and adapt to interpersonal rejection.
|If you're afraid of hurting other adults' feelings you may be harming them!|
|Have you praised the people you appreciate recently?|
|Have you praised the people you appreciate recently?|
An invitation to verbally appreciate the kids and adults (and strangers) in your life
|Beware of giving people unwanted advice!|
A veteran therapist suggests how to give effective advice to other adults
|The Truth about "Paranoia" (Reality Distortion)|
A veteran therapist proposes the real cause of "paranod" thinking ande behavior.
|Three keys to improving your Self control|
Effective options for imoproving your self control in social situations
|The truth about "laziness"|
If "laziness" is degrading an important relationshiop in your life, see this for insigjht and options
|An effectve way to reduce excessive procrastination|
Excessive procrastination can promote frustration, mistrust, and interpersonal conflict
|How to manage interpersonal boundary violations|