<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8" ?><transcript><text start="0.32" dur="5.88">hey everyone my name is streer from</text><text start="2.48" dur="6.76">college humor.com uh last time you saw</text><text start="6.2" dur="4.6">me if you&amp;#39;re not a college humor fan was</text><text start="9.24" dur="4.319">probably when I was being pranked at</text><text start="10.8" dur="5.36">Yankee Stadium by my friend Amir dear</text><text start="13.559" dur="5.361">Sharon I love you</text><text start="16.16" dur="5.32">forever you&amp;#39;re getting married right you</text><text start="18.92" dur="4.64">know how at halftime at basketball games</text><text start="21.48" dur="4.28">one lucky fan is always dragged out on</text><text start="23.56" dur="4.2">court is given the opportunity to take</text><text start="25.76" dur="6.359">some impossible shot to win a ton of</text><text start="27.76" dur="6.4">money well what if that fan were airr</text><text start="32.119" dur="4.041">what if he made that shot and it was</text><text start="34.16" dur="4.8">worth half a million dollars and what if</text><text start="36.16" dur="5">we saw him be told it was all fake</text><text start="38.96" dur="4.2">seconds later and be embarrassed in</text><text start="41.16" dur="5.52">front of 18,000 people wouldn&amp;#39;t that be</text><text start="43.16" dur="6.039">fun I think that&amp;#39;d be fun all access</text><text start="46.68" dur="4.16">look at that and in case you guys are</text><text start="49.199" dur="4.121">wondering how I could afford to do</text><text start="50.84" dur="4.399">something like this uh I didn&amp;#39;t what</text><text start="53.32" dur="4.48">happened was Kate in our ad sales</text><text start="55.239" dur="4.081">department thought this idea was funny</text><text start="57.8" dur="4.64">uh and decided to make some money</text><text start="59.32" dur="5.559">available so so Axe body wash you don&amp;#39;t</text><text start="62.44" dur="4.84">know it yet but you just made a very</text><text start="64.879" dur="4.92">large donation to the University of</text><text start="67.28" dur="5.32">Maryland scholarship fund you&amp;#39;re very</text><text start="69.799" dur="5.241">generous and they thank you for it so</text><text start="72.6" dur="4.44">guys I just got word that Amir is in his</text><text start="75.04" dur="4.36">seat he&amp;#39;s sitting next to a mutual</text><text start="77.04" dur="4.8">friend of ours Neil janowitz now Neil</text><text start="79.4" dur="4.64">was my accomplice and uh invited air</text><text start="81.84" dur="4.319">down Neil&amp;#39;s an ESPN writer and he said</text><text start="84.04" dur="4.039">he had to cover this game for the</text><text start="86.159" dur="3.841">magazine and to get him here to come</text><text start="88.079" dur="4.441">with him as a little added incentive</text><text start="90" dur="4.119">promised air he was going to rig it so</text><text start="92.52" dur="4.16">that he would get picked to take this</text><text start="94.119" dur="2.561">half cour</text><text start="98.52" dur="7.879">shot tonight&amp;#39;s winner is seated in</text><text start="101.399" dur="5">section 10 I know who it is</text><text start="106.68" dur="7.68">12 congratulations to our lucky winner</text><text start="110.24" dur="7.799">please stay in your seat Sports</text><text start="114.36" dur="3.679">Marketing have to back up a</text><text start="118.84" dur="3">little</text><text start="127.96" dur="3.719">shter I work for a website called</text><text start="133.16" dur="4.88">colo. and I&amp;#39;m wondering if you will help</text><text start="135.48" dur="5.08">you drank my friend tonight so here&amp;#39;s</text><text start="138.04" dur="4.04">what&amp;#39;s going to happen in a couple of</text><text start="140.56" dur="3.08">minutes by the way I&amp;#39;m here some back</text><text start="142.08" dur="3.32">signing paperwork through the tunnel you</text><text start="143.64" dur="3.92">can&amp;#39;t hear any of</text><text start="145.4" dur="3.68">this how you feeling it&amp;#39;s a lot of money</text><text start="147.56" dur="3.28">it&amp;#39;s $500,000 that&amp;#39;s why we got</text><text start="149.08" dur="4.439">insurance</text><text start="150.84" dur="6.039">is that a picture or video that was a</text><text start="153.519" dur="5">video you look good though in a couple</text><text start="156.879" dur="3.801">minutes he&amp;#39;s going to come out here and</text><text start="158.519" dur="5.44">try to make a blindfolded half court</text><text start="160.68" dur="6.12">shot for half a million dollar so</text><text start="163.959" dur="6.161">whether or not that ball goes</text><text start="166.8" dur="5.159">in I need you guys to scream and share</text><text start="170.12" dur="4.199">it be as loud as I know you can be</text><text start="171.959" dur="4.681">because I watching this whole game</text><text start="174.319" dur="7.441">please please please help me uh and I</text><text start="176.64" dur="5.12">will never take this seure m I promise</text><text start="187.16" dur="5.05">[Applause]</text><text start="188.959" dur="5.521">well done and our thanks to Aon</text><text start="192.21" dur="4.51">[Applause]</text><text start="194.48" dur="4.72">shanders all right so friends it&amp;#39;s time</text><text start="196.72" dur="5.68">for the half time half court</text><text start="199.2" dur="6.119">$500,000 challenge all right so let&amp;#39;s</text><text start="202.4" dur="6.28">address him here in his</text><text start="205.319" dur="5.351">blindfold one blindfolded shot for</text><text start="208.68" dur="3.6">$500,000</text><text start="210.67" dur="3.17">[Applause]</text><text start="212.28" dur="4.64">basket is straight in front of you half</text><text start="213.84" dur="15.53">cour is about five steps away it&amp;#39;s your</text><text start="216.92" dur="15.63">shot four 3 2 1 go 3 2 1 go 3 2 1</text><text start="229.37" dur="3.18">[Music]</text><text start="233.84" dur="3">go</text><text start="238.68" dur="3">go</text><text start="259" dur="1.72">[Applause]</text><text start="259.709" dur="6.36">[Music]</text><text start="260.72" dur="5.349">[Applause]</text><text start="268.6" dur="6.48">fo</text><text start="271.26" dur="9.06">[Applause]</text><text start="275.08" dur="5.24">,000 Milli what are you going to do the</text><text start="284.08" dur="4.009">[Applause]</text><text start="288.2" dur="3.93">[Music]</text><text start="295.08" dur="3">money&amp;#39;s</text><text start="298.56" dur="3">congratulations</text><text start="302.92" dur="28.559">[Applause]</text><text start="328.479" dur="3">never</text><text start="331.58" dur="3.17">[Applause]</text><text start="335.96" dur="5.01">Seconds come on</text><text start="337.96" dur="5.16">man so what happened when I shot</text><text start="340.97" dur="6.789">[Applause]</text><text start="343.12" dur="4.639">it oh you airballs so hard</text><text start="348.72" dur="6.36">man thank you Neil you&amp;#39;re not mad right</text><text start="352.68" dur="6.519">how what why would they cheer I asked</text><text start="355.08" dur="6.8">him to cheer for you ah yeah it&amp;#39;s been a</text><text start="359.199" dur="4.521">while hasn&amp;#39;t it those old feelings</text><text start="361.88" dur="4.439">coming back</text><text start="363.72" dur="5.24">again did you really think you want have</text><text start="366.319" dur="6.681">yes I really thought I have million</text><text start="368.96" dur="5.88">dollar I&amp;#39;m sorry man it too good this is</text><text start="373" dur="4.039">good because I know what I want to get</text><text start="374.84" dur="4.28">for you next time but I&amp;#39;ve been waiting</text><text start="377.039" dur="4.321">on it oh really you have yeah and it it</text><text start="379.12" dur="3.56">won&amp;#39;t be a year and a half I don&amp;#39;t have</text><text start="381.36" dur="3.48">I don&amp;#39;t have a girlfriend anymore what</text><text start="382.68" dur="3.28">are you going to do you can&amp;#39;t ruin any</text><text start="384.84" dur="5.45">more</text><text start="385.96" dur="7.419">relationships 3 2 1</text><text start="390.29" dur="3.089">[Music]</text><text start="393.57" dur="16.15">[Applause]</text><text start="409.759" dur="3">go</text></transcript>