Greedy, Capitalist Squirrels

Nature is full of beauty, but don't be fooled. It is also full of greedy capitalists. See this squirrel? You may think he's cute, but he's part of the 1%. He only cares about himself and his growing pile of delicious nuts. You see, there are only a limited number of nuts in the wilderness and he is working hard to get as many of them as he can. He spends all day, selfishly searching for nuts to eat...he eats nuts with total disregard for less fortunate squirrels. The nuts he can't eat, he hides...he greedily hoards them so other, less fortunate squirrels can't get them. In just one autumn, he will hide over 3000 red acorns in various places. How many squirrels could he feed with all that wealth? Shouldn't he have to pay his fair share? Wouldn't nature be a better place if squirrels would spread the wealth around? The working squirrel would only have to work a bit harder to support the unfortunate squirrel. But, he doesn't think about the less fortunate squirrels, he only thinks about himself. He wants the other squirrels to die so he can have all the nuts. This evil squirrel must be stopped.

You see this other squirrel? He isn't finding any nuts. He is unlucky. If he had just 40-50% of the other squirrel's nuts, he wouldn't be so desperate. He watches as the squirrel buries the nuts, "Spread the wealth around" he says. But the greedy capitalist takes his nuts and runs away. When winter comes, the hard-working squirrel has plenty of nuts to eat while the other squirrel probably goes hungry. We must stop this injustice.

Category:

News & Politics

Tags:

• Liberal
• In
• Nature
• Garrett
• Hall
• Politics
• Satire
• Capitalism
• Liberalism
• Conservatism
• Socialism
• Redistribution
• of

[Hectotane]

1:15 = Oh my God that sounds so wrong. :P

[racheyloo35]

Redistribution of nuts...I love it! Don't let Obama find out about this. He might impose a new tax on the wealthy squirrels.