This is a humorous speech that I gave at a Toastmasters Evaluation Contest. I was the test or target speaker. I love baseball. It is played in the summer when it's warm except in the season when it is a little different, but what is wrong with a snow flurry or two.
Recently, my wife and I went to San Diego. Our daughter and her husband treated us to a game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Diego Padres. My son-in-law is a marine and landed us free tickets. These tickets weren't in the cheap seats either. I am thinking that rank does have its privileges. He is a Staff Sergeant. Our seats were on the first base side not far past the dugout. What that meant was that we needed to be on the watch for foul balls and on our toes.
The field was wonderful! The outfield grass was perfect. ... Yea the sun was going down over the third base side and it was shining right in our eyes. Did I tell you that we had to watch out for foul balls?
I am used to going to Rocky home games. I was not used to being seated among 30,000 people rooting against me. My favorite player is Carlos Gonzalez. He whacks a double. Do I jump up and cheer and still expect to get home alive? Before I do that I have to wonder how many beers that big guy behind me has had?
I am earnestly watching my team at bat. In fact Todd Hilton is up, a lefty like me. Do you know what happens when your team is the visiting team and they are up to bat. 30,000 people decide it is time to use the rest room, get something to eat or anything that requires standing up. If Helton got a base hit, I'll have to see it on the replays after the game. Cause I am not going to see it now.
Have you ever been to a game and noticed how some people never pay attention to the game. They use the game as their social time. We had a guy near us who had his back to the batters the entire game. One thing he did not miss was the fries, the hot dogs, the peanuts, the popcorn and the nachos. Here comes another foul ball we all jump up. Oh it went into the upper deck. Our socializer needs new fries and may be clean pants.
Do you know what the most stupid thing is at a ball game? THE WAVE. What does it have to do with the game? NOTHING. What it does mean is that you have 30,000 board people with nothing else to do. Look here comes another foul ball! That'll teach you to do the wave.
Have you noticed the mega screen that all the ball parks have? They show the player stats during the game. Stats like their batting average against left handers, with runners in scoring position and less that 2 outs and the stock market up. Between innings they show the fans in the stands. It is a chance for someone to make a fool of themselves in front of 30,000 other people. And they do! They do dances that they must have learned from their electroshock treatments. We had a fellow sitting in front of us jumping around every inning. He was waving his kid around like he was a Padres flag. He never got his 5 seconds of fame.
It is getting late in the game and the Rockies are up by 2 runs. Someone somewhere starts chanting "Lets go Padres" Not to be outdone, my son-in-law who has his fair share of beer, Replies, at the top of his lungs, replies "Lets Go Rockies" Oh man are we going to live through this? Doesn't he realize how important this game is? We are battling San Diego for ... last place. We won and escaped alive. My son-in-law knew what I did not. He had half a platoon of marines further down our row and they had our backs.
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Table Topics - How to Take It Onby GeorgeHazzard65 views
Hahaha loved it! Of course Evan would say..."Go Padres!"
...I'm one of those social hours at the ball park...sorry! :)
gingerlita 5 months ago