Deadwives dungeon master speech

Funny argument from the Deadwives D&D sketch sequel.

"I'm the dungeon master, I control worlds..universes!
Every potion you drink, I MIXED!
Every magic item you find, I PUT IT THERE
You remember when you killed that hill giant?
I rolled a 20, Double damage!
No, You rolled a 19 Mark..I fudged it!
That giant would of killed you man
But I admired your spark
You wanted it so badly so I helped because I wanted to,
and I help people when I want to,
and right now your roasting in the hot belly of a platinum dragon
so why don't you ask yourself where your priorities lie."

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• D&D
• Deadwives
• sketch
• sequel
• argument
• dungeon
• master
• funny