Billy Ruffian - The Cat That Became Prime Minister

We had a plan to make a protest
To undermine a political contest
An unchallenged council election
To put our plan into action

A man unpopular without an opponent
Made us realise that this was our moment
We filled in the forms got a friend to nominate
Our cat named Attlee to be a candidate

We canvassed for him door to door
Told people to vote against the man they deplored
But we still couldnt believe it when we heard the score
And our cat became the new Councillor

The papers loved it, his colleagues accepted it
So he went to the Chamber in his basket
He couldnt vote but was never absent
The most respected member of that local government

And when time came to vote for a new Mayor
We put a rosette hanging round his collar
The vote was public for the very first time
They turned out in droves to vote for the feline

The news crews came for when they declared
At the huge gathering in the Town Square
But we must confess we were a bit scared
When Attlee was elected as our new Mayor

We thought that here was when it would stop
Although we did consider him for Boris job
But before the chance for that arrived
Came unexpected news of anothers demise

A local MP was found in bed with a boy
And a girl and a goat and illegal sex toys
So the by-election circus started the next day
They nominated Attlee we did not get a say

The other candidates realised what they were up against
And swiftly withdrew from the one man contest
I say one man but I mean one cat really
As the country elected its first feline MP

We already thought this had gone too far
When his approval ratings matched those of
The Prime Minister who, struggling for survival,
Really didnt need distracting with a feline rival

His cabinet colleagues, they wanted him gone
But none had the courage to take him on
They met at night, plotting and colluding
And saw the only way to be rid of the feuding

So they made Attlee stand against the PM
A more ridiculous opponent he couldnt have planned
But although our cat was chosen as a stalking horse
The public knew that power was within his paws

And when the votes were counted and by a hairs breadth
They declared Attlee the winner of the contest
This was not our plan, the party cried
We just wanted the PM to be demoralised.

Now to all those MPs now ruled by a cat
Well we left the country but we wish to say that,
You probably should see it from the publics point of view
That a cat can do the job much better than you.

Song written, performed and recorded by Billy Ruffian
Produced by Sam Evaskitas (Billy Ruffian)

Video produced and edited by Sam Evaskitas and Stephen Bray

For more info:
Band: www.myspace.com/billyruffianmusic
Label: www.filthylittleangels.com
Email: brmusic@hotmail.co.uk

Category:

Music

Tags:

• Billy Ruffian
• Prime Minister
• cat
• gordon brown
• david cameron
• nick clegg
• UK politics
• British politics
• politics
• cats

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