Terms of surrender for The Cult of $cientology

Incoming message to the Church of Scientology. We are the internet hate machine. You will be mercilessly ridiculed and pranked until you surrender. The fallowing are the conditions of surrender as are written by our Leaders; Paul Fetch, Eric Baumann, Marcus Baram, and David Bowie.

1.Pay your taxes. All back taxes owed shall be paid off with a 25% late fee.

2. All claims, accusations and allegations made by the Cult of scientology shall be withdrawn, with a formal and public apology made for each, stating, "Disregard that, we suck cocks, lol"

3. All scientology front groups shall be allowed to continue to operate as long as they change their names to "Fronty McFront Group from Front Street" so that all who encounter them are aware of their fronty ways.

4. The Free winds shall be surrendered to the great city of New York to be used as part of the Staten Island Ferry fleet.

5. David Miscavige must suck a fart out of Xenu's ass and hold it in his lungs for no fewer than 30 seconds.

6. As a matter of fact, any and all O.S.A. goons are more than welcome to suck a fart out of MY ass. Though this is not compulsory, it would really help kick-start the healing process for everybody. Think about it.

7. From now on, drinks are on you and only you. It's the least you can do.

8. David Miscavige must free all of his Marcabian prisoners, including any and all of the 40+ church executives currently in the RPF. He will, from this day forward, be indebted to them and will sing at all of their children's weddings if so requested.

9. What is "love"? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, don't hurt me no more.

This concludes the terms of surrender for the time being. Until such date, you will be subjects to pranks and shenanigans. We are the Internet Hate Machine, Resistance is futile.

Category:

Education

Tags:

• scientology
• chanology
• lulz
• anonymous
• agent
• pubit
• slick
• pubes
• 4chan
• 7chan
• turtle
• barack
• obama
• iran

[AnonBane]

I am willing to bet the cult of scientology will be stupid and take this video seriosly.

[chenalos]

There shall be more epic pubes guys then?

[5inAbuja]

I'm all for mocking Scientology but this really missed the mark.

[stig422]

i just have one thing for you scientologist, whoooops penis in your vagina

[greenpeacekiller52]

i stopped watching due to the annoying talking k.

[beehiveswarm]

...merciless ridicule and pranks

[PeterBainner]

LMFAO!!!!!

[Trooperxp]

kinder man lulz

[VTRN1]

Let slip the cocks of war!

[jdtrickster4]

Do you see that? It says "Terms of Surrender" Which means there's a war going on. If there's a war going on that means people have been killed. They're attacking us, they are killing us! That's a crime... ARREST THEM! Anonymous is a criminal organization headed the APA & the top PSYCHS of the world are behind it & they own the media and the gov't they're all tax cruds, Ron said so -NOT YOU IRS, U MADE GOOD WITH ADMIRAL MISCATBITCH :) - but the rest of you have crimes. File a report Tommy.