Playing The Normal Game

Sometimes, we have to behave differently then we are used to, or in some cases, comfortable with.

Here I discuss some of the times I do this. Or try to, but unfortunately, I don't know how to pretend. I only know half the picture, though the other half is foreign to me. It's like everyone else can mind read except me. Also, is being normal a good thing to be called?

I'll put a little story here which isn't in the video:
I work part time as a deli sales assistant. There is a number-queue system where people take a number and wait for their's to be called so they can be served. Sometimes when there are not many people, they don't take a number. Then I can't work out their intentions - are they waiting in the area for someone else, just looking or wanting to be served? If you don't serve them, they get all grumpy at me. It doesn't really matter, because I just ask them. BUT just this year I learnt that if they want service, they look in my eyes and do this eyebrow raising type thing. This is useful, because when I go places where there is no obvious queue, I hate it, because I don't know how to get service and I don't want to just yell out 'service plx' because that's rude if people are busy. But doing the eye thing means you get service or they say 'be with you in a moment' if they are busy. In this case, doing things the normal way saves me awkwardness, which comes with anxiety, which is a good thing :D

This is in response to several videos made by the Aspie community quiet a while ago.

Proud to pass as NT: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JWqAp4LBuuw

Autism: Pretending to be Normal: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UpbMIG_rwkE

Category:

People & Blogs

Tags:

• nervousneuron
• neuroscience
• normal
• neurodiversity
• aspie
• aspergers

[Kangeroo04]

It sucks that people have to 'act' different to fit in with society, people different than society make up so much of the beauty in the world, and not to mention the really cool inventions we have!

[nervousneuron]

I agree, to an extent. It depends on what 'fit in with society' means. If it means not being antisocial (violent, etc) then it's a good thing. But when it comes to having some odd and eccentric behaviours, so what? Why should we have to change who we are if it doesn't hurt others?

[AnElephantThatPaints]

I dress nicely, and that is about it. I just do what what makes me feel comfortable. I do have a verbal filter, so i don't say the wrong things to people i just met. To me, the costs outweigh the benefits when I "play the game" and I think it is unfair that we have to do it. I know people are capable of more acceptance, because my high school is unbelievably open minded.

[nervousneuron]

Yeah, it's true. It's unfair, but that's life. For example, sure, you can go to that job interview in the garbage bag for lulz, but you have the choice: a decent attempt at getting the job vs self expression or what have you (but the win situation is when they find that funny and hire you for that :P).

[MePowlo]

i like the dress :) Also watched your video on addiction which was good too particularly at 12mins 30 when you adjusted the frame :)

On a serius note I understand where you coming from with this vid since i have AS and your neuroscience / behavioural science vids are very interesting.

Please do more with the frame set right - they're very interesting and educational at the same time.

Very cool :)

[tcass100]

Your Awesome..Totally understand the WoW stuff..LoL.

[SaintCaptainFreakOut]

My best friend has been going to counseling and receiving medication (untill he decided to go off the meds) for Schizophrenia. He discovered recently Dr Hoffer's Niacin Treatment, on Youtube, Now he has ordered a book by Hoffer. But Honestly, I dont think you have any real issues. I think you understand relatively well. I do the same things like make fun of myself. I say this because I wish that I could walk around in a world with nothing but ones like you, then I would have better chances.

[sugarspy76]

this was a great video.....keep it up...I enjoyed the differences but has anyone ever thought that maybe we are all alike cause they are a lot of NT's out there that actually are closet aspies LOL Some people just want to think they are normal but really who or what is normal in this day and age cause if 90 percent of the population has some sort of mental illness than really who is normal who?????? No one LOL Love it

[AnElephantThatPaints]

The thing about job interviews is that they only last an hour or two. You are right, sometimes it is worth it to sacrifice your individuality for that time frame. Or you can choose to interview over the phone like Temple Grandin did.

However, having to commit to a mask every day at work or school can be too stressful for some people. When people get denied or fired from jobs for irrelevant things like this, it is called a glass ceiling. It once affected women and African Americans as well.

[AnElephantThatPaints]

It can be helpful in the short term when dealing with people you don't know. However, feeling obligated to do so whenever out of your house, I think that is too much and unnecessary.