Wacky Bible Stories 3

1 Samuel Chapter 5

Category:

Education

Tags:

• bible
• christ
• christianity
• jesus
• atheist
• agnostic
• god
• devil
• heaven
• hell
• satan
• yahweh
• azsuperman

[azsuperman01]

@Cunit1874 How am I mocking God? I'm telling stories directly from his book.

[kstokdal]

what the fuck! an atheist got a promotion at work?! clearly the all powerful lord has been slacking on smiting sinners. thats ok, god can get lazy sometimes

[zideffil]

spark117, what's the matter with you? Don't you recognise great humour when you see it? Hemorrhoids is far funnier than bubonic plague or 'plague of rats'. That's another trouble with Christians - no sense of humour. Honestly though, can you REALLY tell us that you BELIEVE silly stories like this? I mean, if one reads the Bible as fiction/humour, one can find a usefullness for the book. Try reading Song of Songs or 'Solomon's Songs'. It's hilarious. 'She has eyes like the fishpools of Heshbon'

[dolores5552]

hey ur funny,could you do something from Jesus? Like some of his healings or times that he said "how long do I have to deal with you" or "ye of little faith". I chuckle every time i read him saying it.

[shootomatic]

LOL. you pick on bible versus....how weak. try picking on Gods grand design, consider what it is to be infinite. consider science and the beginning of the universe as we know it.

"it is he who has revealed the book to you, some of it's versus are precise in meaning, they are the foundation of the book. And some are ambiguous.Those who's hearts are infected with dis-belief observe the ambiguous parts as so to create dissension among men" - The Imrans.

[bluesmann8]

@kstokdal it rains on the just and the unjust but i wouldn't push your luck. god will not be mocked.

[wtfomgstudios]

@kstokdal And how the fuck does an all-powerful God say "Hey, leave me alone! I'm tired even though I have all power in this universe!"

[seeker6789]

I thought only the most holy people could handle the box. Even Unworthy Hebrews would die on the spot if they touched it. How did the philistines manage to steal it? And move it several times............ Gods wrath is painful and itchy.. LOL

[goatmilk51]

You are so funny LoL

[toulouse666]

So God is against homosexuals, yet he has an anal fixation... hmmmmmm, interesting!

[dixievfd55]

If to touch the ark of the covenant was to immediately die, then how did they steal it?

[d3vilnaruto]

I lovee your stories :DDD