Bo Burnham - "I'm Bo Yo" Super Extended - Aladdin Theater - 10/16/2009 *EXPLICIT* w/Lyrics

Bo gives us some fun snippets of other songs and then launches into his 11th song "I'm Bo Yo" which turns out to be a super long and crazy extended version. This was at the Aladdin Theater in Portland, Oregon on October 16, 2009. The first part he starts playing is the tune to "A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton.

Now I don't know if all boy scouts are gays
But they could probably "tie the knot" in like...
I got a safe full of cherries,
cause I pop it and lock it,
A girl's like a fridge,
once a week you should stock it,
And girl, if your into a rimming
it's only safe if your swimming,
but girl don't sit on the couch
cause I treat my objects like women.
I spit fire like I just blew a demon
My shits so hot I leave your toilet bowl steaming
I'm gonna tarot like the cards of the gypsies
You'll bleed for so long you'll get monthly ellipses.
If your pants are loose, I'll re-pleat ya.
You're a first time vegan and it's nice to meet ya

I'm bo yo I'm the greatest rappa eva
And I'll weather your weather whether you think I'm clever or not
Think your better you're not
Don't need a sweater I'm hot
I'm a real G that can really find your g spot
Whoa yeah! Help me out doorman!

Go to a Vagina orchard, count 1, 2, 3
Spin that plant around you got a third world CUNT-try
That's right, consider yourself warned
I'm offensive and creative like handicapped porn
Your playing with your breasts, excuse me, can I try it ma'am?
Your pushing 'em together like a titty Venn diagram
Look at that CRACK excuse me can I buy a gram?
Right below your diaphragm, ass looks like your hiding ham.
First base, were making out mother-f*****
Second base, I'm getting faked out yo
Third base, I'm getting take out
Try to take it home if I knew I'd take it out
But I just don't know
I said I just don't care
I said my flow is so cold
I need a tampon for my polar bear
And you can spell and smell my stink
B.O. lingers and it makes you think
*Chorus*
It was all a dream I used to read a quick Nick magazine
Ren and Stimpy, Tommy Pickles and the gang between
I'm watching TV in the dark
Every Saturday Double dare with my main man Marky Mark
Summers, Falls, Winters and Springs
I've seen 19 sets cut me open count the rings
But I wish that I could be 8, 9, or 10
Wearing "Life is Good" t-shirts that made sense back then
You wanna know me well here's a list
When I tried to hit puberty I swung and I missed
I like palindromes like "do geese see god?"
Or "go hang a salami, I'm a lasagna hog"
and I can do a rubix cube in a minute 20
Fast food and the internet's plenty for me
I'm simple with one dimple
and a weird mole thing on my left nipple

I'm part of the fattest country on the global scale
and were phat with a ph on the ph scale
Because we're so basic
Give us a house and a car and a kid
So we can raise it praise it blaze it up
and get lasic to see how bad we fucked it up
We all had braces our smiles are fake
Another mother saw her hunter daughter's water break (?)
The Miley Cirus virus is as bad as it gets
and similarly bad is simile Tourette's
'Cause like its like I like my right to like
but like I also have like a life to write right? Wrong.
This is a road kill song but I couldn't avoid the bouncing ball during the sing along
I'm a little tea pot whose steaming mad because the worlds not terrible cuz im hot
1, 2, Fuck You
I take a stroll around the block to relax my mind
and then I walk by the clock just to pass the time
and rhymin', mathematical timin', syntax impacts the intact hymen trust me,
you don't want to fuck with me check my record,
wrecked it on my SAT's I got a 780 math, 730 verbal
kick a Jonas brother and he'll fart out a gerbil
Voice so sweet call me Mr. Herbal Tea
more deadly than Joseph Goebbel's pee
in a swastika Dixie cup
I got a dick full of helium I'll fuck you up
Put up your fists its a battle of wits
and if you bring your facts sis
just the cattle with tits
and I'll get mad at their zits
and paddle their bits
with saddles and whips
and rattle their clits...that was rude.....
Yo, Cause girls are like donuts when I be busting Bo nuts,
I can make em cream-filled or give them a layer of glaze
I'm like Doug's friend Skeeter whenever I meet her.
'Cause I skeet her so hard people call her Patty Mayonnaise.
My girl's epileptic cause she's the one I'm jerkin with
Come on you Asian child laborer show me what your working with
Ooooh large machinery
'Cause there's an inverse relationship between respect and sex
I'm talking about religious sex like a Mormon sect
That says you can't have sex with members of different spects eeeaaaahh...

This description isn't long enough to put the last part in, but you get the idea. "This song's gonna end really awkwardly. Thank you." =)

Category:

Music

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[Sweetie19621]

My parents bought tickets to see him live for my birthday...lets jus say it was one awkward birthday.

[spod823]

STOP SINGING ALONG ITS ANNOYING AND HE HATES IT

[DaMincraftiest]

I'm Jewish and still love him!

[DaMincraftiest]

ha ha ha ha ha his Juicy cover was hilarious, and the Miley Cyrus turrets part!

[GamerCherri]

So this is where Words Words Words kind of originated?

[FunMinecraftHD]

I remember when they would clap along he would say, "You're not a fucking metronome." on Word, Words, Words

LOL

[keithallancomedy]

@SAMMYCOisDAVE no that aint it

[shortuf0]

I like how some of those lyrics made it into words words words

[SAMMYCOisDAVE]

@LegendKillaz rhiannah umbrella

[SAMMYCOisDAVE]

@hawhawk2 get someoen to film it and put it on youtube to prove that u done it

[LegendKillaz]

what's that song that he pretends to play at the beginning?

[Hellogoodbyeiamhere]

I love this guy to death. Funny thing is, Im mormon. I don care he is HILARIOUS!