Caregiving 101: Don't be a CareTAKER

Person needs help, not thievery, not mundane chit-chatting on the phone with you boyfriend. CareGIVERS give; they are there for the Activities of Daily Living (ADLs): personal hygiene, food preparation, medication reminders, light housekeeping, common sense issues like answering the telephone (write messages with date and time and your signature), transport assistance, transfer assistance, prevention of falls or accidents. CareTAKERS: sit on the phone for 5 hrs, forget to feed me, forget to change my linens, forget to bathe me, fail to pick up a piece of trash (they actually just step over it), and at the worst, they steal. They steal your jewelry, your linens, your silver, your coats, your jeans, your shoes, your socks, and they drain you of your own energy. Give me privacy. Make sure I brush my teeth. Attend to my needs in a Serving manner, as this is MY house, this is MY stuff, and you are not to steal from me. If you do not want to take care of me, get out of my house. Otherwise, I expect that you will give me all of your attention and protect me from the outside world, protect me from thieves and liars. What can you do for me? 100 times a day, "Is there any thing I can do for you?" Go put me in the sun for 5 min. Let me breathe some fresh air. Put yourself in my shoes, for one day, you will need a caregiver (if you are lucky). How you Caregive today has a lot to do with how You will be cared for later. This is MY home and don't touch anything that does not belong to you. Do not go through my cabinets. Do not invade my home or my privacy. Treat me like a human being.

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[DysautonomiaMD]

When the elderly begin to lose memory, give money to strangers, let strangers reside in their own homes, etc.......it is good to have discussions about Power of Attorney for Health Care and for Financial matters. This way, loving children can ensure that their parent's live's holdings will have decisions made by you.

Regarding mean-spirited elderly, I'm sorry for your particular situation. It must be hard and I wish I could wave a magic wand and make it all better. Your own channel...:-).

[edwin4759]

i attached a video for you i write this song, maybe this will help in some ways

[DysautonomiaMD]

@edwin4759 : you are amazing. God sent you to us and look at what you have already done. You have made us smile and your love for people shows through all that you do. Please know that God sees everything you do, and He is storing great treasures for you in Heaven. In this life, the greatest command is to 'Love One Another'...as Christ has loved us. May you keep the spirit of love with you forever. Lolv.

[edwin4759]

i just wish that the good caregivers be given the best client so both can benefit each other... u r on the client side and u got bad experiences, i am on the service staff side and me too suffer same bad experience from clients, and agents.... but to me i dont take it as a lost, i gain more strength, and knowledge about what kind of people i will work for...

[DysautonomiaMD]

@edwin4759 : you give me hope that there are people out there who really care.

Thank you and

Highest Personal Regards,

Dr. Margaret

[jd450lh]

cont'd @DysautonomiaMD...you will in the future, find competent care givers.

May the Lord bless you and keep you my beloved sister in Christ!

Your Brother in Christ,

Jeff

[jd450lh]

My mother has had experience with some poor caregivers. It's sad to think that many of their patients are mentally alert, but need private care due to a problem with mobility and for this, they are taken advantage of. My mother finally fired the agency and brought in a friend who at least will clean the floors, vacuum and works every minute she is there; she has been a God send! I am sorry that you've had such a bad experience with care givers and I pray that (cont'd)

[LiquidButterflye]

I want to thank you for helping the elderly....but alot of the times what is overlooked is the careGIVERS themselves. My husband and I gave up our life after my father died, at the request of my mom, to come live with her., and it's been HELL ever since, the way we have been treated by her, now were stuck living here until we pool our money together, so we can move out. No one ever seems to talk about the elders that are MEAN spirited, and EVIL, and ABUSIVE, maybe I'll make my own channel.

[DysautonomiaMD]

@edwin4759 You are right. It is a special calling that brings our soul great joy.

Amen and Good For You for going to an Ombudsman who helped you! Hat's off to you & God Bless Your Soul.

I tried to do the same thing, but no one believed me, until strangled body was uncovered as a murder, not a natural death. Nursing home went under; 9 people indicted I think; company just ditched that home & changed it to something else.

All it takes for evil to rule, is for a good person to say nothing.

LoLv

[DysautonomiaMD]

@edwin4759 : hi. Yes..absolutely right ~ to get a reference from some one else who has already used a good caregiver...this is the stuff that life & love is made of. Best option.

Either the sick person or a family member may be there for initial interviews, but when every one leaves and the patient is sleeping, no one knows what the caregiver is doing.

Social workers are good at recommending a nursing agency, but are not responsible for any outcomes. Wish they could do something, though.

Tx.

[edwin4759]

@DysautonomiaMD i guess the calling is the most we can have pleasure doing... i always work with my heart only because when u r happy with what you do, u perform the best. i always love to take care of this people.... i worked in a facility of special people, i have learned to show them that they can also feel love and well taken cared off... the thing i hate were the staff i was working with for most of them were rude to them, i went to the ombudsman to report one staff and i got him jailed..

[DysautonomiaMD]

@edwin4759 : for chemotherapy patients and others, a sanitary restroom and kitchen are a necessity. Many clients may be unable to ask a caregiver to clean the stool off the back of the commode. It doesn't have to sit there for a week. :=). I'm just talking about every-day stuff we encounter, and I appreciate your perspective.

Sounds like you are some one with a good heart that cares and is dutiful beyond that which is necessary....I commend you for this, as you store treasures in heaven.