Can Straight Men & Gay Men Be Friends?

this video is basically about my question on whether to men of different sexual orientations can be friends, real friends. Is brotherhood really universal?

Category:

Entertainment

Tags:

• Friendship
• gay
• straight
• no
• homo
• brotherhood

[derfnoslen]

@keemy18 I'm not trying to defend my friendships but I am trying to paint a picture which is difficult with this character limit but I think society as a whole, males in particular have a long way to go in open mindedness concerning gay people. I don't think that limitation has anything to do with true friendship. If my friends know I'm gay, accept my boyfriend, and there have been times when they told me off for not bringing him around. That's pretty good in my book.

[keemy18]

@derfnoslen i get that. but im one for equality. im gonna naturally not share intimate details of my sex life with straight men. primarily bc i dont share intimate details with everybody no way. however, if i mention some sexual act i expect them to grow to the point of not seeing as so different from when they do it. if i can't do it, if it makes them uncomfortable for me then they shud see how it can make me uncomfortable when they talkin about eatin this or lickin that, ya know?

[derfnoslen]

@keemy18 I agree completely. I think I've reached a point where I decided it doesn't matter to me if they are not open to that kind of talk. I think gay men in general are probably more sexually open than straight guys. Your're a cool dude (no homo lol) and you have good conversation so I can't imagine a guy not wanting to be cool with you. I think you should give the straight guys a handicap and give them a pass on those issues... for now. Especially if they are cool in every other way.

[keemy18]

@derfnoslen see thats the thing about me. i'm demanding. i dont give handicaps. i dont expect handicaps in return. i demand a lot because i give a lot. i pride myself on being a great...if not exemplary friend. so i expect what i give ya know

[keemy18]

@derfnoslen but i love my best friend whose straight. ultimately we accept each other. and when there are points of tension we address them like adult men should.

[derfnoslen]

Well I can't say I don't feel that way sometimes. I won't say that I can't it's just that they get weird... It makes them uncomfortable. Perhaps we should define true friendship because I don't believe the things you've mentioned are key factors to it.

[keemy18]

@derfnoslen what i was saying was true friendship wasn't the surface things i mentioned. those surface things add up to the deeper and greater concept of ACCEPTANCE. i feel like friends accept each other, warts and all. and the fact that u feel like you had to share that you aren't feminine seems to me that its a defense of your friendship. that if u were feminine, they wudn't accept u. which i can understand. but the relationship i have with my friends...we accept each other as we are.

[derfnoslen]

This is a great discussion. I probably should do a video response but in response to you, most of your friends are women. If we are talking about relationships with men, straight men at that, gender rules have a major part. I have one straight friend that I can talk about guys with etc. That's it.

[keemy18]

@derfnoslen this, to me, is not adequate friendship. i feel like if i've really been accepted for who i am, and being gay is a part of that, why should i hide it? they dont. they can talk however they want about women, why cant i mention if a man is cute? why cant we laugh about that? why cant they put their 2 cents in about that guy u think is cute? that, to me, is true friendship

[derfnoslen]

I have many straight male friends that know that I'm gay. I'm not feminine or anything but I'd say we are all really close. But I never really talk about anything gay with them, I never share my crushes or if I'm watching a movie I can't say "wow, he's cute" stuff like that. I do kinda wish that I could. I comment on things that they like, I'll comment on a girl or listen to their sex stories or whatever. It's weird. I just kinda let the good outweigh the bad.