* Delivered as an Icebreaker Speech at London Corinthians Toastmasters Club, 13 Jan 2012
I sat there, 7 LCD screens in front of me: A dazzling array of tiny flashing numbers in bright colors, feeding information into my brain. Under the table: 3 state of the art computers - the best that money could buy. As I clicked the button, a myriad of sophisticated algorithms executed their orders on stock exchanges all over Europe. Minutes later, I had the confirmation - I had sold $300 million dollars worth of stocks for my client.
Mr. Toastmaster, fellow Toastmasters and welcome guests - yes, I was one of those people. I was an equities trader at an investment bank - not just any investment bank mind you - I was working for THE investment bank - Goldman Sachs. At 27 years old, I was a master of the universe - trading millions of dollars for hedge funds, sovereign wealth funds and large pension funds. Just a year into the job, I was earning a salary multiple times that of my mother who had worked as a school teacher for 30 years.
There was only one small problem: I wasn't happy.
To explain fully to you how I got there would take the better part of an hour, but I will sum it up with one word: Anger. Anger was my fuel. I grew up in a middle-class Singaporean-Chinese family. My parents fought constantly about money. I thought to myself - if the lack of money was the root of suffering, then lots of money surely would buy happiness! I channeled all of my anger and frustration in doing well in school, meeting the right people, doing the right internships.
Another story parallel to my search for money was my search for meaning. Ever since I could remember, I've always wanted answers to the bigger questions in life: What is God? Does he exist? If he was perfect Love, why did he create so much suffering in the world? Why are we here? I went through the spiritual buffet line - Christianity, Athesim, Agnosticism, New Age, Personal development, Buddhism, and finally, A Course in Miracles - which is the spiritual path I practice and teach now. Through A Course in Miracles - I knew I had my answers. I had found much inner peace and fulfillment through its central practice of forgiveness, and had let go of a lot of my deep-seated anger - a true miracle.
They say it's a fine line between foolishness and bravery. 2 years into the job - I left the bank with the intention to teach ACIM online. Some might say it was foolish, irrational and idealistic. But I made the decision looking at my life from the highest perspective - what did I want to tell my grandkids when I was 90 years old, on my deathbed? Did I really want to tell them that Grandpa was a glorified moneychanger? My heart was very clear - I wanted to share the wisdom I had discovered in my spiritual journey. There was no greater meaning than teaching Love and Forgiveness. I wanted to make my passion, my career, and to make my career my life!
Today, I write on my website, make youtube videos, and use social media to communicate my message. I host a weekly show on an internet radio channel, where I interview A Course in Miracles teachers. I am also training to be a speaker - and I have my first speaking engagement in May.
The Zen monk Thich Nhat Hanh says that, "The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the green Earth, dwelling deeply in the present moment and feeling truly alive."
The miracle I am talking about happens on the inside, not the outside. A miracle happens when we change our perceptions towards a more peaceful, gentle view of the world. A miracle happens when we choose to forgive those who trespass against us, knowing that they are but a reflection of ourselves.
It's not a fairy tale ending. I don't have all the answers. Life continues to be exciting, challenging and uncertain. But I can be sure of one thing - I have found my meaning in life. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is absolutely priceless.
Mr Toastmaster.
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How Banks and Hedge Funds Pick Stocksby ForexHustle4,578 views
Love it! I didnt realise just how much you did in your past job - Im glad you found what you love now :)
anyaval 1 month ago