Am I Doomed To Get A Divorce?

Question: "How do I avoid becoming a divorce statistic?"

For more on Paul Carrick Brunson, visit:
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transcript of video:
This is Paul Carrick Brunson with Ask YourTango, answering all your love and relationship questions.

Today's question is, "With the divorce rate being so high, how can I avoid being a statistic?"

We often times are swayed by these doom and gloom statistics and I hate when I see these doom and gloom statistic.

The reason why is because not all data applies to us.

Let's take this 51% marriage rate for example. All data shows that that 51% is a complete broad stroke.

And for those that date in a very committed way, and that is for at least two years, the divorce rate shrinks to 20-21%.

My point is that dating, just like any other facet of life, is hard work and you want to do it diligently.

And so that's why two years is the number because you need to have enough time to be to not only hear someone's values, but observe how they act, right?

Watch those values play out.

You want to be able to determine if you speak the right love language. You want to be able to see your vision is aligned. You want to see acts of selflessness demonstrated.

There's many of us that are happy in our relationships and many of us that have very successful marriages.

I'm sure if you do it right - take your time and you're diligent, you will as well.

Category:

Howto & Style

Tags:

• divorce
• why
• statistic
• marriage
• data
• paul
• carrick
• brunson
• dating
• advice
• tips
• love
• romance
• relationships
• doom
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• commitment
• happy
• selflessness
• love language
• values

[Vogue1306]

Nice guy :)

[brainly]

thank u 4 this ans! dating in less than some weeks and getting married base on emotional love only wont work. love and need or love and satifaction love are two different things. reasearch has shown that "companion love" is what keep relationship together and to know if u have it then u have to get to know ur partner for a long time (or have deep spiritual connection)

[affiliate30]

this is all a bunch of bullshit, life is too short and there are millions of people out there who are way too fun to be with, I want to be with as many of them as I can before I die, long term relationships are bullcrap, they all go bad at some point, specially if you are not an experienced lover and all you get left with is time wasted

[heathr1424]

At least I can understand what he is saying compared to some of the other ones whose 2nd language is English.

The 51% statistic is way misunderstood anyway.

[deenman23]

@JayTheSex haha

[Chrixtal]

@Chrixtal Choose a couple like you would choose a friend, don't put any pressure on it, your couple must be your best friend, take the relation seriously, establish goals you can achieve together, and above all, you must be with someone you can have endless fun and laughs, someone you can share a similar sense of humor.

[Chrixtal]

It is not about the number, this was a grey advice; comunication, trust, love, caring, passion, etc... many couples while they date the keep this little "games", "if he/she does this I will do this other thing to him/her". I see many couples are not open to each other in many ways, some other just resign to somebody because this person was in their close circle of friends/school/job, and I know many of this kind. Many this are to say about this subject, but I would say, stop playing games.

[RCTPatriot75]

How do keep a women happy? You can't.

How do you keep a man happy? From time to time, shut the hell up.

[john123wayne]

the easiest way not to get divorced?

don't get married. :)