How to Slay a Vampire: The worst thing ever filmed?

Feast your eyes on these five-minute clips from How To Slay a Vampire, which may very well be eighty minutes of the worst footage ever filmed by human beings. No movie before or since has ever been made with so little effort or with so much scorn for the audience. Thrill as you watch an interminable sequence of plastic dinosaurs humping, multiple extended shots of guys sleeping, or an uninterrupted fifteen-second shot of a man standing still and pissing. It may be hard to believe, but none of these are anywhere near the worst scene of the film. That would be the excruciatingly slow sequence where the vampire fondles and dry-humps a blow up doll, which takes up close to one-tenth of the entire movie. If you decide to rent this and sit through the entire film, you are a masochist, plain and simple.

The crappy audio and grainy picture quality are part of the movie.

Category:

Film & Animation

Tags:

• How
• to
• Slay
• Vampire
• John
• Polonia
• Mark
• worst
• movie
• ever
• filmed
• most
• unfunny
• comedy
• Bite
• Night
• bad
• acting
• awful
• effects
• no
• budget
• dinosaur
• chronicles
• splatter
• farm
• peter
• rottentail
• sophomoric
• potty
• humor

[RIVERJETS]

Apparently you watched it all.