Spidey Project (the musical) - Part 1 of 4

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The musical that was completely written and produced in under 30 days, on a budget of only $0.

The Lyrics - News Opening/Peter Who?

(KENT HOLBROOK, the fear mongering reporter, is getting ready to broadcast the local Channel One News, he is warming up in his dressing room as assistants are buzzing by.)

KENT. Emmy, emmy, emmy, emmy, believe in yourself!
ASSISTANT. Not, till you're national Kent!
KENT. Emmy, emmy, emmy, emmy, you can do this Kent!
CAMERA MAN. You're on in three-two-

KENT. My name is Kent Holbrook
From Local Channel One

Panic strikes our borough
And we all feel the sting
Everybody's kids are wrapped with fear
My name is Kent Holbrook, from Local Channel One
And college application time is here
So stop your teens from smoking
Their flagrant drug abuse
For temptation's on the loose.

(Forest Hill High School, the students are all a little crazy this time of year. Halls are crowded with people scribbling in notebooks and reviewing notecards. KATIE and KAREN are trying to photograph MARVIN KEELY in the hallway for the Yearbook. Marvin is `the one' for this scene)

STUDENTS. Oh God! The mid-terms start tomorrow!
My parents call me a disgrace
They always look so disappointed
Someone somewhere punch me in the face!

KAREN. Smile for the yearbook. Real smile... is this how you want people to remember you Marvin Keely? As an ironic smiler? (Peter enters, clearly on his way somewhere) Peter! I need you to get a quote from Flash Thompson for the yearbook. You know, something great... or whatever... like whatever he normally says. (Peter is about to protest) No! No asking questions, just please, just do this! Marvin Keely I am NOT a patient woman!

STUDENTS. Oh God! The Mid-terms start tomorrow!
I'm I wanna rip my brain in half

GIRLS. I'd rather give a speech to congress
And wet myself while they all point and laugh

PETER. Flash, Peter Parker, I just need a quote for the yearbook.

FLASH. Who, Peter who?
Look nerd, I don't have time for you.
You want to talk to me?
Nice try but you're not that cool!
Who, Peter who?
There's other stuff I gotta do,
Like anything but sitting here and wasting time on you!

STUDENTS. Oh God! The mid-terms start tomorrow!
Oh god, I'm ripping out my hair

GUYS. I'd rather get my girlfriend pregnant.

SOME JERK. And push her down a flight of iron stairs!

KATIE. You! Peter, you!
We wanna choke you till you're blue
Peter, blue!

KAREN. Did you get that quote?
PETER. No.

KATIE. Great, what are we supposed to do?
You! Peter, you!
Now Gwen Stacey is in the queue

KAREN. Last chance, Peter!

KATIE. So grow a pair and get that quote, or don't come back
Your yearbook job is through!

PETER. It happens just like that
Every time I try to have my say
They tear me down and lock me out and push me right away.
It's always just like that
And it's been since Freshman year
God what am I doing, what am I doing, God, what am I doing here!?

STUDENTS. Oh God the mid-terms start tomorrow!
I'm freakin out, I've lost my mind!
I'll get some aderol for next year
Cause ADD plus pressure times my parents equals me nailed from behind!
Oh God!

Category:

Entertainment

Tags:

• The spidey project
• spiderman smackdown
• justin moran
• spider-man
• musical comedy
• improv
• new york city
• the pit
• turn off the dark
• julie taymor
• funny
• marvel
• travis nilan
• liz bachman
• claire neumann
• michael lutton
• ryan nelson
• louie pearlman
• robin rothman
• jon roufael
• magnet theater
• comedy
• comic books
• spider-man musical
• musical theater
• original musical
• comic-book musical

[fresa2you]

I want a soundtrack!

[deadpooljte23]

Awesome-sauce.

[jeralgrant]

This is brilliant! It just shows how awesome human creativity can be, even with limited resources!

But could you guys put some subtitles or something during the songs? I know the lyrics are hilarious and hate that I can't understand some of them.

[jacobs06]

it's kind of hard to hear some parts which is a shame since i think this is something i'd really enjoy if i wasnt trying to hard to understand what they were saying

[hexanne]

he's gonna play that piano to death!

[bigswallow2]

Well done! A True Believer!!!!!!!!!!!! Love, Super Laundry Bag

[ZamTx1]

This is great. Betty is hysterical!

[drcrank]

SWEET! In the battle of zero dollars and real Spidey fans versus gazillionaires with no connection to the wall crawler, the fans (and Spidey) WIN!

[peteagassi]

Everybody has AIDS!

[borvise]

Ya'll did a stupendous job on this show. It was wonderful to watch. Thank you for sharing it with the world.

I can't get The Midterms Start Tomorrow out of my head.

[jpoolerdom]

thanks, woot.

[filkertom]

I WANT A DVD OF THIS. I want a really well recorded production, or a complete soundtrack album, or something. Excellent!