Living Interracial: James and Bukky Harthoorn

James and Bukky Harthoorn, married in 2005. Even though Bukky is from Nigeria, James met his future bride at a church in Iowa. Both said they had prayed about finding the right spouse, and were brought together through God.

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[James Harthoorn]

I recon people do look at us a little longer. But the truth is, if I see an interracial couple I look longer too. My daughter probably likes the extra attention. The other day she explained to someone at the park, "my mom is brown, my dad is beige, and my brother and I are golden brown". The lady said "it looks nice" and my daughter went bouncing on her way. I do think their is an extra challenge in teaching mixed race kids about identity, but it can be done and has advantages as well.

[James Harthoorn]

I don't recommend "interracial" marriages or discourage them. I recommend finding the person God has for you and if that means and "interracial" marriage that is great. I married my wife because of her character, personality and of course physical attraction is there as well. I married a person not a color. We didn't marry to make a statement, but we realized that in getting married were making a statement.

[James Harthoorn]

Good to read the comments. We haven't really seen racism even though we live in an area known for it. Things like the internet, however, bring out some interesting opinions. I had to laugh at the comment "The funny part of that statement with this story is that she is considered black here in American even though she is Nigerian". Speaking of defining the terms; I think the term "interracial" is incorrect. We are all in the same race; the human race and we come in different shades.

[sexychocolateHAITIAN]

WOW !! You are so blessed. This is my only concern when it comes to dating outside of my race. I've been black all my life and I've been the only black person @ work/school etc. So I'm used to all the stares and stereotyping and bigotry. I have thick skin to it. But, I would worry about the guy. Would he be able to handle losing some family members/friends and disapproving coworkers etc. How do u guys deal with it?

[JVLIVSPhoto]

Love is love and love knows NO color. I have cousins who are an interracial family and they held it together quite well so far. Almost 40 years now.

[karonnie1]

god bless you both

[lanicert]

Lovely couple. I am black (American) and my husband's family is also from Iowa. They have always been loving and accepting of me, and the ones who weren't had a change of heart before we were married. When we visit them in Iowa, we never experience any difficulty or discomfort from the family or the general public in the Des Moines area. We do get interesting glances when we go off the beaten track, though (Pella for instance, lol).

[73thelionofjudah]

Beautiful testimony of finding love!

[Ripley1156]

The guy is handsome!!!

[tmwamala601]

I also live in a Dutch community Northwest Iowa