Transactional Analysis 1: ego states & basic transactions

music: http://theramintrees.bandcamp.com/track/to-be-serious
First in a series on TA, offering some of the metaphors I think can be useful in conceptualising and dealing with interactions. This first video looks at the Parent, Adult and Child states, and basic transactions.
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Recommended TA texts:
1) Ian Stewart & Vann Joines: 'TA Today: A New Introduction To Transactional Analysis'
2) Thomas A Harris: 'I'm OK, You're OK'
3) Eric Berne: 'Games People Play'
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Category:

Education

Tags:

• PAC
• Parent
• Adult
• Child
• transactional
• analysis
• ego
• games
• stuck
• script
• TA
• complementary
• crossed

[karolis685]

When talking to our own children should we be in the parent state or the adult? Should everyone constantly strive to be in the adult state?

[TheraminTrees]

@karolis685 'Should everyone constantly strive to be in the adult state?'

—Not in my view — or the view of any TA writers I've come across. We'd miss out on all the positives of the Child and Parent states, which are explored in the next video. The thrust for me is that we shouldn't rely too much on C and P states because of their restricted awareness. So the aim is to strengthen Adult awareness — which ironically helps us to see where Child and Parent behaviours could work well.

[karolis685]

Can the child and parent states overlap? i.e. When you were a child your parents made you feel embarrased and shameful upon nudity and once you grew up and became a parent yourself you still feel what you felt when you were a child.

[TheraminTrees]

@karolis685 '... and once you grew up and became a parent yourself you still feel what you felt when you were a child.'

—Yes — TA capitalises Parent, Adult and Child when they refer to the mental states, as opposed to lower case parent which indicates the physical fact of being a parent. So someone who happens to be a parent still moves from P to A to C just like non-parents.

[Clearie552]

would a child-child relationship also be unstable because each person is trying to rely on the other for guidance at the same time?

[TheraminTrees]

@Clearie552 A Child-Child relationship might be unstable if the either one or both is looking for a Parent in the other. But if both are in Free Child it could work well, with both parties just enjoying a spontaneous, playful relationship.

[kobac]

I've read so many books on TA in which I have a great interest, but this video is one of my favourite materials I would recommend to a beginner interested in TA and what TA means. Thanks again!

[TheraminTrees]

@KaseyBrownFitness You can have a range of responses to nudity in the same state. In Adult state, I've had a chat and a laugh with some nude folks on beaches, and avoided others — my response differs because of all kinds of specific information I'm receiving, as well as my own priorities in the situation — eg, how much time do I have, are there things I want to be doing like reading a book, etc..

[SlagarNZ]

TA Today vs I'm OK - You're OK: TA Today reads more like a textbook. It's digestible, but reasonably structured and scientific in its approach, and filled with technical detail and exercises. It's certainly more up to date. I'm OK - You're OK, on the other hand, while lacking up to date detail and exercises reads more like a pleasant conversation, and guides you through TA. I enjoyed it more as an intro text. I'd recommend Joe Sixpack investigate both, and decide based on his reading habits.

[777wanabe]

ner! ner! ner!

[Joshden1]

round of applause

[prchecker]

love the video really good

[staranjela]

Very enjoyable thank you

[prchecker]

great video thanks