I Must Get Into That Spot

I must get into that spot.
I'll wriggle and I'll worm,
and I'll squiggle and I'll turn,
for I must get into that spot!

It's only six inches by four,
but between you and me, this is war!
I'll knock over your drink,
and push by in a blink,
for I must get into that spot!

I know I'll be blocking the door,
and really there's room for no more,
but I'll step on your wife,
don't give us no strife,
for I must get into that spot!

I must get into that spot.
I'll charge like a Bull,
barge you into the wall
for I must get into that spot!

I suppose you'd consider it rude,
but that's my imperative mood,
I'll stamp on your feet,
and I won't keep it neat,
for I must get into that spot!

O what do you expect me to say?
"I'm sorry I got in your way"?
No, I'll laugh and I'll snort,
Shout - "You're a venerial wart!"
For I must get into that spot!

I must get into that spot.
I'll climb and I'll choke,
I'll slime and I'll poke,
for you see;
one simply and absolutely,
most definitely
and emphatically
determinedly and positively,
without questions of morality,
must
get into that blasted spot!

Category:

Comedy

Tags:

• Poem
• Poetry
• Bees
• Windmill Tavern
• Lambeth
• Noel Howard
• Noel Coward
• Ditty
• Spot
• Manners
• Politeness