TSA Style Body Scanner Will Help Shoppers Accept How Fat They Really Are

Body scanning isn't just for invasive airport security anymore! Now, shoppers at London's Westfield Stratford mall will be able to submit themselves to the humiliation of a full body scan, in order to accurately determine just how fat they really are. Masochistic customers of the New Look store can step inside the space age contraption, strip down to their knickers, and get blasted by a series of PrimeSense 3D lasers. The resulting data will tell the person what size is best suited for them. The machine is meant to cut down on dressing room wait times, and ill-fitting returns, but will probably only disappoint a vast number of delusional fashionistas who were bent on squeezing their size 10 butt into a pair of size 4 slacks. Maybe ignorance really is bliss!

Category:

News & Politics

Tags:

• TSA
• body scanner
• uk
• london
• bodymetrics
• new look
• lasers
• scanners
• westfield stratford mall
• primesense
• 3D

[DeeDemonwitch]

They should employ people like me, it would be much cheaper. People who, when asked 'what do you think? does it suit me? does my bum look big in this?', will answer honestly.

[SCARREDMIND]

funny enough, under uk law if you put an under 18 in these 'scanners' there is a good chance you would get arrested for creating child porn.

[dan91709]

It always amazes me what people buy into... The problem with buying clothing that fits is that the sizes of the CLOTHING aren't always 'exact." In reality, the "automatic" size scanner is an expensive gimmick.

Oh well, at least you can feel like Woody Allen in the movie "Sleeper" for a few minutes. ..."What is that - Velvet?" :-)