John McCain's 'Straight Rap Express' - 2008 Election SATIRE (Adult Language)

In a last ditch effort to save his campaign, John McCain appeals to the youth and hip-hop crowd to inspire his message of peace through war, freedom through socialism, and conservatism through the liberalization of America.

Inspired by Lisa Nova, Snoop Dogg, Sarah Palin, and John McCain. This is for comedy purposes only and is in no way representative of anything more than a homegrown attempt at political satire.

***Lyrics Start***

What's up muthafuckas?

Uh huh.

You know it.

My name is John McCain.
I'm a Top Gun Maverick that crashed five planes.

Finished 5th from last in my class.
Now I'm runnin against a nigga and he's kickin my ass.

Flew the Skyhawk in Vietnam.
When I run this fuckin country I'll be bombin Iran.

Sittin in the big A-4
I'll take ten trillion dollars, then I'll ask you for more.

Yeah I came home with a limp.
My wife Carol had one too and she looked like a blimp.

She better lose some weight.
I met a Barbie named Cindy who brought beer to the date.

Best of all she was rich.
One whiff of all that money and I married the bitch.

And that's the way that I play it.
I can't sing worth a shit, so I might as well say it.

Hanoi Hilton is the place that they raped me.
Uhhh.
Vietnam is the place that they shaped me.
Gooks.

I'm a liberal Republican.
I got a socialist bailout with all my democrat friends.

In Bush I do conform.
Except for torture, global warming, campaign finance reform.

And now Sarah's my bitch!
Fucked up my whole ticket, is it too late to switch?

The economy is strong my friends.
Ain't gotta take a piss because I'm wearin 'Depends'.

I ride the Straight Talk Express.
$150,000 just to go get dressed? Uhhhhhhh...

And now I'm losin the race.
People votin Barack Obama cuz he's got a black face uh.

Hanoi Hilton is the place that they raped me.
What's up?
Hanoi Hilton is the place that they raped me.
That's right, my friends.

Why'd you spend all that money on clothes, Sarah? I'm supposed to be a conservative in this race! What is Barry Goldwater going to think?

Just keep saying Barack Obama is a terrorist.

I don't know what else to do.

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