Someone Like You... Only Better

Uploading probably won't be happening too regularly... I just really felt like this needed to get out of my hard-drive.

Not sure what it looks like since my computer hasn't let me look at it, but even if nothing is timed right and it doesn't look a thing like I imagined to I'm keeping it up here. This is to remind me of the past and to keep me looking forward to the future.

The following is a rant that I wrote to myself in a Word document about two weeks ago. These past few weeks have been interesting, emotionally. So I needed to rant.

Not looking for sympathy or pity, just needed the closure.
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At first, we were just two kids who felt something for each other. You said that you loved me early on, and I desperately wanted to believe that you did. So I fell for you, I fell head over heals for you, and of course that's when you started to pull away. I loved you, I loved you with all my heart, but in the end that didn't matter much.

I should have said something; should have told you what I was feeling, should have made more of an effort instead of letting my emotions fester. For a while I blamed myself because of this, but then I realized that you didn't do anything to help our situation either. You sat back the same way I sat back and watched unchanging as our relationship fell apart.

Two days after we broke up, after months of being with each other, I walked down the halls, confidently telling myself that I didn't need you in my life, I saw you making out with another girl. I didn't let it show but my world shattered. I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life that day.

I was a mess. I missed you more than you could ever know, but my pride wouldn't allow me to let anyone see. I tried to make it look like I had moved on, it wasn't hard. In the week after we broke up four guys told me they liked me (one of them was your best friend). I hung out with them and laughed with them, but it wasn't the same. I wanted you back. And then you started talking with me, in a way we hadn't talked in a long long time. You told me how nothing had been going right for you since we broke up, how you kept messing up and making everything worse. A large part of me agreed with you, but there was hope that things might go back to the way things were if we both felt the same way. You started to ask me some personal questions and what do I do? I get so raging mad at you that I could hardly contain myself. How dare you?! I thought. How dare you act as though you were the only one going through issues? I had literally given you EVERY part of me and you dared to start asking me the stuff that you did. Needless to say, that sure as hell shut you up. I haven't talked to you since.

I realized something these past few months without you that I seemed to have forgotten: you don't own me. I don't know why I let you have this much control over my mental state, but never again will I fall under your spell. Maybe the hardest part of this whole thing is I can't seem to hate you for all we've been through. I don't know how many tears I cried because of you, yet I can't stay mad at you. I could say I hope you're happy with her, but if we're being honest there's a part of me that wishes you won't be. But don't you worry about that, because I've found someone that's like you, only better.

Category:

Gaming

Tags:

• ChasingReality2009
• Someone
• Like
• You
• Adele
• Someone Like You (Adele Song)

[TifaLockhart64]

I love this pretty song... Fantastic work