Jewel - A Housewife's Revenge

Lyrics :
Seems like that man took my heart
Laid it neatly out before him on the floor
Then he put on the biggest
heaviest winter boots he had
And stomped on it for three hours,
Maybe four
And I hope his Sorels are ruined forever
Cause you know he knows how to push my every button
Get down to my last nerve

Like the other day he forgot to put his beer can
In the recycling bin
And he meant to do it on purpose I'm sure
So I might just have to tell him
Why his dog, Ralph, that ran away three years ago
Won't be coming home again

Cause you know he walks around the house
In his underwear
Whenever my girlfriends come around
And perhaps if he were good looking
I might feel a bit jealous, overzealous
But all I feel is embarrassed
Looking at him standing there
And I hope he never finds his left slipper

And my psychiatrist says I should tell him how I feel
He says, "Oh great, I gotta listen to her snivel again"
So I have these little unfulfilled fantasies
Of putting arsenic in his teacup
We'd see who'd be laughing then
If only he was the type to drink tea

Now here he comes up the driveway
In his El Camino
With its black with a red-flamed firebird on front
He keeps the keys to himself
He won't take me out to the movies
Cause of football
So I'll just hold out on something else
I'll never cook him another single Hungry Man TV dinner again

I say, "Listen man, you better treat me with some
r-e-s-p-e-c-t
Cause I gotta a whole lotta what you need
Then a whole lot besides, and then still a whole lot more"

He said, "Yeah, if you were talking about your weight
that might be true - but otherwise what you give me is
Headache and heartburn"
So I took his Hungry Man TV dinner and his Sorrels
And I spit on him as I walked out the door.

And by the way, your dog Ralph won't be coming home again

Category:

Music

Tags:

• Jewel
• Kilcher
• A
• Housewife's
• Revenge

[darkkit1994]

I found the song a little creepy, but it was good.

[miscboy720]

I absolutely love this song.

[wlkgbrft1]

What is this crap? I compose and sing an impromptu song like this every night when I'm fixing my husband's supper, and he says "does there always have to be some kind of noise coming out of your mouth?"

[knoyknot]

Interesting...dark humour wrapped up in story-telling.