CHEMTRAIL ALERT

TRANSCRIPT:
Barely have time to write the transcript, but just a quick heads-up.

My sources within Area 51 have informed me that there will be a huge chemical dispersal between Friday and Sunday--this Friday and Sunday--throughout the midwestern region. I advise you all to look toward the sky, and keep an eye out for any vertebrae-shaped contrails or rainbow colored jet exhaust.

I am not yet aware of the purpose of this dispersal, but I hear that it will be the most massive exercise ever of this nature. So, keep your eyes peeled to the sky, and I will pass along any new information to you as soon as I have it.

Thank you, and godspeed.

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