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No More Heroes: Battle With Dark Star (Rank 1st) Sorta Again

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Uploaded by on Feb 2, 2008

We come upon a long dusty road and a fearsome looking Knight looks like it's time for the final battle!



WHAT! YOUR MY FATHER!?!? BUT I THOUGHT THEY WERE KILLED HOW COULD THIS BE...

Oh someone took my kill again...Damnit
WAIT WHAT!?!?

Your my sister I MUST HEAR YOUR STORY...Oh alright I'll fastforward so the age rating doesn't go up and the game doesn't become No More Heroes Forever (tee hee)

"You are my half brother. You know that manga called Miyuki the japanese one? Well it's like that.

Your father abandoned my mother to run off with your mother. It broke her heart beyond repair, she killed herself knowing I had nowhere to go he took advantage of me.

Ever since I can remember he molested me. We lived in this rotten apartment and I was his slave.

Every day I cursed his soul, I swore I would kill him one day. But cursing didn't change anything. Thats when I decided to become a killer.

With no money to pay for training I paid with my body.
But to you I bet that son of a bitch looked like a hard working family man.

That was all an act. He didn't give two shit about cleaning up my life.

So I decided to clean it up myself thats why i do what I do and I got what I wanted killing him infront of your very eyes."


...Err wow that is quite something..

YOUR MY SISTER!?
I'm sorry it has to end this way Jeane having to kill my own sister...

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  • likes, 4 dislikes

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Uploader Comments (Blitzmage)

  • Out of the 13 bosses present in this game you only get to fight 10. Incidently, I heard a rumor online that that there will be aboot 50 bosses in the sequel NMH2 (or rather the Stereo guy was Assassin #50). Anyone backing this up?

  • There isn't much known about the game at the moment. The stereo guy was listed as 50 in a magazine scan but I highly doubt you will actually fight 50 assassins.

    Might do it the mad world way where you skip up a few ranks every now and then from random enemies or perhaps he raises up in rank too killing some of the others! Nobody knows for sure there is very little known pretty much all rumors you hear are speculation.

  • There's still one thing I don't get.

    Why does she have the same name as his cat? (Jeane)

    It's confusing. Just like in Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn, when a bird and a Godess shared the same name (Yune)... What's the point of having two characters with the same name in the same game? It's stupid.

  • Well he named his cat after his ex girlfriend that broke his heart...

    I'm not sure if they are suggesting surprise incest here...

  • Personally, I wouldn't say it's 100% impossible for Dark Star to be Travis' father. I mean, how the hell does he know so much about him?

  • No no no Jeane killed their parents defiantly. Travis was even there in the flashback he has.

Top Comments

  • Wow! Dark Star looks harder/better/stronger than any Final Fantasy boss.

  • OH SHIT! They KNOW they're in a game!! O.o

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All Comments (144)

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  • Jeane = Tifa + Britta Perry

  • lol since when was travis the game admin to fast forward?

  • @Axen901 ranked number 49 is charlie macdonald whos a football player. His cheeleaders count as a ranked assassin and when you kill them all you become number 25

  • @Blitzmage so Travis have got a bro and a sister

  • @VicGeorge2K6 no they're nukeing the 4th wall

  • They're breaking the fourth wall here.

  • WHOOOOOO!!! STEVEN BLUM!!!!!!! Well, at least he died by a hot chick's hand. :)

  • I will not! You know it's true

  • Ack sorry! I meant to give you +1 and ended up giving -1. On-topic, how many times you think those lines were used? lol Well I still think this one's a winner

  • shut the fuck up

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